Day 200

Wednesday January 24

Something I forgot to mention in the last entry. This whole push we’re just starting now, which is about to manifest in its first live show in just a few minutes, is something we wanted to get started on possibly as far back as early November. Which was when one sickness after another kicked in. And as each subsequent period happened, we could see the calendar inch, then speed towards Christmas, knowing that if we didn’t get at least one show on the board by mid, or even early, December, we would just have to sit back and wait till late January. Which, as stated by the very date of this entry right at the top of this paragraph, is exactly what happened. 

Right. On to today.

Rock’n’roll wisdom #782. It’s harder to play to five people than it is to five hundred. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Apart from anything else, this can cause a situation where, even if one or two people (up to 40 per cent of your audience in this situation) like you, no-one wants to break ranks and clap and cheer if everyone else is staying silent. So in a sense, the silence can become exponential. Have I just invented exponential silence? I do believe I have.

So yeah. You really do feel naked when being stared down by just a few people in a bar. Or possibly even worse, not being stared down. Which means they just keep their backs to you and hunch over their pints, probably hoping that by the time they turn round to go to the toilet or whatever, you’re not there anymore. If it’s five people being like, we really want to see you, show us what you’ve got, that can be really good. But apathy bordering on unwelcomeness? We really do get the feeling that the people in here tonight either couldn’t care less whether or not we were there, or really wish we weren’t. No-one’s being rude and there isn’t a single thing in any way anyone acts that we could complain about. But you can just tell enthusiasm levels are non-existent. And we’re going to stand up and play to this now.

It’s a sceptical crowd (crowd?) on a wet and reluctant Wednesday. I totally get it. If I was in a relaxed cosy bar just trying to have a quiet pint and maybe catch the last bits of the football while chatting quietly to a few mates or casual bar acquaintances, then two hyped up bunnies with a guitar smashed in saying they were going to play some of their own songs? Yeah. My reluctant cynicism would kick in too. Yeah. I really think I’d be like, ‘Fair play to you guys, but not tonight, eh?’ Maybe I would be keen to go ahead to let the guys show what they had, but I have to admit that would be nothing more than associative bias.

We think Dominic is really keen to hear us, but anyone else just couldn’t care less. But we’re set up, we’re set to play, and we’re going to do it. Sometimes, in more, let’s say, politely reluctant environments, we’ve gone in gentle, people have worked into it, and then, on one particularly memorable occasion, have eventually been like, ‘OK. Give it now. Let’s see what you’ve got.’ None of that here. But we don’t wait. It’s a slow Wednesday and this is our first chance to make a first impression. The next impression won’t be the first one. I understand that’s how it goes. We go straight for the tried and tested crowd pleaser I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). And we play it like we mean it. Straight up, raw, and stadium. Wow. Actually, not a bad reaction. The guys have swivelled round in their chairs and are watching us with some interest now. We barely take a breath. Into Rock’n’Roll Tree. Halfway through this the phone cameras are out. And we get a good vocal reaction when we hit the final climax. Everyone’s totally with us now. All on the same side and they’re ready and waiting for more. One more, we say. We only intended to play three or four anyway, and it seems like quick in and out is the way to go. We’ve got ourselves ahead in tonight’s competition. Let’s stay there. The Cat comes out and the filming doesn’t stop. People are leaning forward into us now. Dominic is loving it. And so are we. As big a reaction as you could expect from five guys when we finish this one. 

But as the last notes echo and fade and the guys quietly turn back to their pints, the cavernous bar swallows up all our efforts and it’s already as though we were never there. We have absolutely no idea how it’s gone. If anything, badly. We sidle back to where we came from, almost trying not to be seen, and order a pint at the bar. We sit there in silence, the rest of the bar feeling like it’s also in silence. Some muted conversation down there but not much else and no-one’s looking in our direction. It’s as though we’ve never been in. ‘Oh, I feel awkward,’ says Maja. Yeah. I feel it too. But we’re going to stick around and front this out. We did great. We decided a long time ago that if we ever bombed in a bar it was them and not us. Then Dominic comes over. He stands over us in silence for a while then says, ‘You guys were shit.’ I look him in the eye with a ‘no hard feelings’ smile and say, ‘Thankyou very much.’ I genuinely have no idea if he’s joking or not and up front honesty is always to be appreciated. Even if, or maybe even especially if, it’s negative. Almost immediately he seems to decide he can’t do it to us anymore. ‘No, I really enjoyed that,’ he says, breaking into a smile. ‘Especially that third one. That was your best one.’ Oh wow. Yeah. We’ll take that. Then, as if taking us into his confidence, what he says next kind of suggests that how we thought it was going down was how it was going down. He tells us that when we started, all hyped up and into it, one of his regulars down there said something to him like, ‘What the hell is this?’ Yeah. We saw that guy. He didn’t give much, but there was a kind of intrigued interest going on the more we played. Well, at the end, Dominic says that guy turned to him, nodded and said, ‘They were quite good.’ Apparently that’s a big deal. We’re now told that this is a discerning music fan who is slow to praise and quick to criticise. I’m sure you know the type. Open but cynical I think would be fair. Possibly keen and on the lookout for something new and great, but perpetually underwhelmed and disappointed with what they’re being offered. But no. He liked us, and Dominic says that’s significant. More. As we’re packing up that guy comes over to us and is enthusiastic and very friendly in his praise. Oh wow. That was a moment. One by one almost everyone else in the bar also comes over to say well done and to tell us how much they enjoyed it and that it was great to hear something different. Really, if that’s not a triumphant gig from hard beginnings, I don’t know what is. For a first time out, no fanfare, no anticipation. Wet Wednesday with the football on and all that. Yes, we will take that. 

Whatever has happened tonight, Dominic thinks there’s been enough to at least have another go. He comes and talks to us again and we start to talk about what we might do next to see if we can at least try to make this work. First, he says he should have known it would be quiet on a Wednesday and that this might not have been the best night to try to kick things off. He suggests next Tuesday for another try. That’s quiz night. He says there’ll be a decent few in and it could be good to see what we can do with that with a few songs during the break. Brilliant. We’re on.