Fire The Scriptwriter

Category: The Making Of The Album

The Third Ireland Diary, days 19 to 161

Day 19
Thursday March 17

Mark:

Oh I am not having fun this morning. The sea is really swelling and picking the ship up and down and I am really feeling it. All I can do is lie down on the kind of sofa bench we manage to make our own once we’re up and the actual bed is all packed away. Maja is up and about being social and attempting to introduce me to people but I’m sorry. I just can’t. If I lie down it’s kinda OK. But if I stand up, everything just seems to fall away beneath me. I don’t even feel like talking to the new friends I made yesterday. A passing nod if I see one of them when I go off on nature calls but that’s about it. Although there is quite a fun moment when one of them sings I Like You Better When You’re Naked at me as I pass him in the breakfast queue. Oh, did I just say breakfast? Sorry. No. Can’t. Oh, and now this. I really can’t believe this. Bizarrely, even just starting to write about the whole thing has caused something to psychosomatically happen and the world has ever so slightly started swimming and swaying again. I have to stop. Nope. Can’t even write about it.

On dry land and back in the car for the final leg of this epic journey, we start talking about what to do next. As we reflect, we start to conclude that the tour has really been a very elaborate dry run and the opportunity to develop ourselves as a live act. A great experience, but we don’t think wider Europe offers much for emerging bands. Where can you go? Scandinavia? No. Eastern Europe? Not really. France, Spain? No – and in particular here, I have intimate personal knowledge of Spain’s grass roots music scene. It does have one and it can be very good. The problem is, it doesn’t have an audience. Maybe Germany. Which really means Berlin, and we do feel we’ve created a toe hold there. After that, possibly Amsterdam, and maybe Prague.

Having done what we’ve done in the past few months, we now feel ready to begin to announce ourselves on the real marketplaces of emerging original music – Ireland and America. But really, more prominently for us, Ireland. Especially as it’s where we have our base so that automatically makes more sense. Of course, we do have America in the diary for late summer so that will take care of itself at the time. Until then, we decide we’re going to play as much as we can in Ireland and really try to get ourselves established there.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but today is March 17, which means we’re arriving back home in Ireland on St Patrick’s Day, and at a perfect time too. And it’s perfect for another quite bizarre and coincidental reason. It was a year ago today that we had the idea to write songs and tour the world and agreed that we would do just that. And here we are, exactly one year later, returning from our first international trip playing songs that have all been written by us since that day.

Maja:

It feels absolutely epic to return to Ireland today. Today is St. Patricks Day, which is well celebrated in Ireland. I’ve never been in Ireland during St. Patricks Day before, so I don’t really know what to expect. As we’re driving through the small villages we manage to catch the St. Particks Day Parade, which apperantly is a thing I am about to discover. The traffic slows down and we observe what looks like an whole village walking on the street, in funny vechicles, in trucks, drinking, being dressed amusingly in green. It’s marvelous. As a little truck drives by with a couple of lads dancing around on the back, I open the window to wave at them. And get squrited with a water gun. Thanks a lot.

I am over the moon that we got to catch the parade somewhere. A couple of hours later we reach home, and oh my gosh. I haven’t been home in too long. The unload the car and put the house in some order before we’re ready. We’re going to the Trap. To tell everyone we’re home!

As we reach the Trap, everyone is already drunk and most are home already. It seems like most drink at their non regular bar at this particular date so we don’t find a lot of people we know. But Angela who runs the bar gives us a big welcome home, and with that, we’ve landed in Ireland.

We’re back!

Friday March 18 to Monday Monday April 4

Let’s just cover this section of the return in one go. Over the week of arriving, a lot of rest happens, and then we slowly start to get the studio back together while also gently putting the house back in order as our mass of road equipment starts to get reassimilated. We’ve already decided that when we hit the road again, we’ll have less stuff than we’ve taken this time. A little more streamlined if you like. But for our first tour we did OK with what we took and not once did we find ourselves wishing we’d brought this or that. And we’ve learned a hell of a lot, not least that we can actually do this. That we can go into bars cold, get gigs, entertain and generate income. We also discovered that our level needed to come up a little more in terms of stage equipment, sound knowledge and in a few areas of actual performance. We bought and used the equipment, in the process gaining more experience of setting sound. And then during the enforced break in Sweden we really worked to up our performance game. Now we’re going to take a little time at home to rehearse in our Irish studio and pull up those few more performance levels we think we need. This will mean going deep and working on tiny percentages such as backing vocal placement. And with some of our increased vocal performance levels, quite a few of the songs now need to have a key change and these keys need to be discovered and practised.

During this practice, a new setlist starts to take shape as we start putting together what will become known as our smash set. This is to be a short 25 to 30 minute set of eight to ten songs, every one of which are just big. Which means no Insanity, Breakthrough, Wide Blue Yonder or even Smile Is Going Round, which has gone from a slightly up tempo pop tune to a gentle, insistent slow burn. With that change it regained its place in our affections and in the set as it was in danger of dropping out altogether. But it also means there’s no place for it right now. This short, intense set is designed to hold us up in the demanding, and frankly slightly hostile atmosphere of coverbar world where we intend to place ourselves. I’ve never seen anyone attempt this. Not on the scale we’re about to, going out there time and time again into such environments. But really, the theory here is that this is about taking ourselves directly to the end audience. To explain that, let’s take a look at this. First of all, and most simply, we think it will give us more gigs, or at least it will give us more venues to be able to take a run at. There aren’t a huge amount of venues for original acts, and even fewer for those making their first steps. Those bands tend to play quite sparsely, placing shows quite far apart to maximise audiences basically because there are only so many times in a given period even their more committed friends and family members will come out to see them. It can also be quite hard to get shows in the early days. You have to persuade a promoter to fit you somewhere on a bill, normally at the bottom of a three or four band evening. Then, if you do well, you can start to climb further up until you’re doing your own headline shows and then progressing with this to play bigger and bigger venues. That’s the hope anyway. I think you can already see that this is quite a time consuming process. The plus side is that on the way you’re playing to open minded audiences that want to get out and see new, emerging acts so they’re generally more eager and forgiving than your average bar crowd. But this audience is not huge. It also means that you’re not coming to the attention of the wider public at all. That doesn’t happen until you really get up in the atmosphere as a headline act playing pretty decent sized venues, hopefully with attendant press coverage, massively hopefully including some kind of TV or radio play. And believe me, looking at it from grassroots, this is a high bar to be aiming at with very few even attaining that level of success. But even then, for a band starting to show signs of breaking through, those early TV and radio slots will tend to be of the niche programming variety. So no. The general population won’t even be vaguely aware of you until you’re at least nibbling at the bottom rung of the fame game. What we’re doing is going straight to that end audience now. That means we have to able to grab them instantly and keep them grabbed.

Maja:

Right from the beginning we engineered the songs to captivate the toughest of audiences that wouldn’t always be open to listening to original music. So no singer songwriter vibe, no calm songs about heartbreak. Only short intense songs without too many instrumental breaks, with a lot of dynamics to keep people’s attention glued to us. And that’s also why we only play for 30 minutes in the kind of bars we’re playing now. People can’t keep their focus for much longer. They start to want to get back to talking to their friends, order a new pint and the music, however captivating, starts to overstay its welcome. That meant we needed to write about ten short intense, catchy songs of around three minutes each, and we needed to build an intensity of performance to keep the audience’s focus. There’s also no time for talk, because the audience doesn’t really want to listen to what you have to say. Get on with the music please. That is, if we even want you to get on with that.

So where we are now is that we need to get in there, present ourselves during setup, do our show swiftly and do the talking after the show, when people know what we’re about. The idea is that the people get to speak to us afterwards, when they are still in shock over how amazing our show just was. That way we don’t need to explain as much and it’s easier just to let them talk. We’ve already shown them that we’re rockstars, and they get the chance to take that in.

Mark:

This period now is about really consolidating ourselves and being able to put all the above into action, mixing in all the experience we gained from Germany. We settle on a set, selecting what we believe are our biggest songs. And as we do, we realise we’ve inadvertently written out the track listing for our first album. Oh. We have our first album. Which will be this set and some of our slower songs such as Insanity,

With that we’re ready to get to work. We put no pressure on ourselves. We’re going to be ready when we’re ready. We’re thinking two to three weeks to focus on rehearsal and then we’ll get back on the hustle trail as we start to take on Ireland. The idea now is to get all these up to standard, and then make one take, one track recordings of each one, to make what we call representation recordings. These will essentially be to show to prospective album producers so that they can get an idea of where we’re coming from, and they will also give us something to show to bars when looking for bookings.

And while we’re settling back into our small country town Irish life, people around here are starting to ask us when we’ll be playing in the local bar again. Almost every other time we’re out someone will ask. Even in the shops. And so many of these people we don’t even know. Yes, it does feel pretty good.

Day 38
Tuesday April 5

Mark:

Warm pitch to start today. From when we played on the ferry to Ireland from France we have a recommendation from a guy called Cockney. This is to a bar called Joseph McHughes in Liscannor, Co. Clare, about two hours drive away. Our plan from there is to drive to the nearby town of Lahinch and see if we can pick up a gig there, then we’re going to go have a look at Galway which I’ve always heard so much about as a live music centre and which everyone has been telling us we simply have to go to.

We find Joseph McHughes, a pub in a tiny area. Practically two pubs in a car park and that’s it for round here. In we go and we find the manager. We introduce ourselves and drop the name we have. ‘Oh yes, Cockney,’ she says. ‘He sent you here did he?’ Indeed he did. Saw us play on the ferry over. ‘Well, if you want to see how you go we could fit you in this Saturday.’ Oh wow. Straight in. Yeah we could do that. We chat times and come up with 9pm. Brilliant. That works.

Now we drive to Lahinch and have a look around for a bar that looks like it could work. We settle on a place called The Corner Post. Again, it’s a pretty quick pitch and the guy says we could do 10:30pm this Saturday which would work perfectly as he has a large party in that night. Fantastic. And just like that we have two gigs booked for Saturday. Now let’s try our luck in Galway.

No. Galway does not happen. It looks fantastic. Colourful and lively looking, so full of promise with, just like we’d been told so often. Bars offering live music on almost every corner, and on all the streets in between. And the lovely Eyre Squre in the centre surrounded by bars. Yes, there’s a lot of hustling to be done here. But we’re not far into it before we realise there could well be two problems with Galway. And the more we try our luck, the more our initial thoughts are confirmed. First, with it being such a tourist hub, and with music being one of its principle attractions, of course everywhere is booked. All. The Time. And with mostly the same people holding residencies in a given bar. Yeah. It soon becomes apparent the whole place is tied up by booking agents, who we’re encouraged to get in touch with. But for what? A two hour show? Chucking in covers and trad songs? That’s not our thing. There’s a strict model here and we just don’t fit into it. Second, we don’t get to speak to a single manager, so no decision makers. And even if there were, we very much get the impression they still would have referred us to their agent. We had such high hopes of Galway and we’ve turned up absolutely nothing. And after picking up two gigs so easily in tiny seaside towns.

On the way home, we conclude that has to be the way to go. Forget the so called famous music epicentres. We should be focusing on the midlands – the area of Ireland we live in – and the outer areas of the cities. As for the villages, hit them all. Even, or especially, the tiny ones. Maybe the managers there want music but don’t get pitched so much. We really think that’s a good idea for what we have, but oh, what a disappointment Galway has been.

Day 39
Wednesday April 6

Huge relief today as a result comes in we’ve been eagerly awaiting and dreading at the same time. Ed Sheeran wins his courtcase which he’s been fighting alongside his songwriting partners Steve Mac and Johnny McDaid.

If this means nothing to you, just let me say first, that this is huge, just huge for us. There have been a lot of concerning plagiarism cases recently, or at least it’s felt as though it’s proliferated recently and in a way, I actually kind of get it. Bear with me. I’ll come to that. But while there may be some genuine grievances in plagiarism cases, so many of the ones flying about around the current time are purely spurious and nothing more than shakedowns. People with no chance of doing anything for themselves trying to legally steal from those who’ve actually gone out and made it. It basically boils down to, I once used words, that songwriter is using words and made them into a big money making hit. Therefore he or she owes me money. I’m not even exaggerating that much. The Ed Sheeran case felt like a bit of a landmark moment. If he won, maybe this could set something of a precedent and signal the end of these kinds of pathetic, money grabbing, empty spurious claims. But if he lost. Oh man. If he lost. We really don’t want to think about it. It could have been the end of songwriting as we know it. As Ed said himself summing up the experience afterwards, 60’000 songs go up on one particular streaming service every day. I had to go back and check that. Yes. Every day. Which makes 22 million a year. And that’s just on one service. And all of these songs use the same 12 notes. If you’re reading all this Diary because you love your music but have no idea about how to go about making it or how it’s made, yes, there are just 12 notes available to us. That’s if you don’t count the notes in between that we generally don’t have but which are used in some eastern forms of music and I’m not counting them. Those 12 notes. A, Bb, B, C, C#, D, Eb, E, F, F#, G and G#. Yep. Taking away the eastern stuff which can sound a bit strange to us, going back centuries, or even millenia, every song, music score, piece of classical music and every single song on every single Beatles album, uses just these 12 notes and nothing more. Because there is nothing more. Again, as Ed said, coincidences are bound to happen. And yes, there is some imitation, homage and reference. But downright copying? Not as often as you might think. I mean, consider it. Really consider it. I write a song about my wonderful, magic football which I love very much. Try, if you can, to imagine the wonderfully unique melody that only I could possibly have come up with. ‘Maybe you’re gonna be the one that plays me/ Don’t call Saul/ You’re my wonderball.’ Now seriously, do you really think I’d be calling my friends to come round and hear my amazing new song and think they wouldn’t pick up on it? No. Outright copying, for the very most part, just does not happen. Songwriters are creators who want to create. Not copy something else and pretend it’s theirs. Alright, there are some bad actors out there, but for the most part, the people doing the bad acting are the ones accusing others of doing it and then trying to nick all their money.

Now we come to this. If Ed had lost, there’s no two ways about it. It would have been open season on songwriters and as close as dammit to finishing up our chances before we even got out of the gatefold. Anyone who ever had a hit ever, from this day on, would have had it stolen from them the second it got the tills ringing. Basically, the industry into which myself and Maja have set sail and are attempting to steam dead ahead into would have been all but destroyed. I don’t think it would have stopped us doing what we’re doing but I think we would have been living in state of denial that it was even a thing anymore to actually have a go at making something in there without having it stolen from you the second it actually became something. Believe me. The long long wait of a week or so from the conclusion of ‘evidence’ in this case to the actual judgement coming down was agonising.

I did say that I did get it didn’t I? Well this is that bit. We’ve said before that it’s never been easy to make it in music at any level and in any discipline. But to try to get anywhere now as an original act, I don’t think it’s ever been harder. So for those trying but never getting anywhere and not seeing how they can get anywhere. What can they do to shorten their odds of at least getting something out of this game? Try to take it from those who have it. Yeah, record companies have been doing that to artists forever, but now artists are doing it to each other. And so often, it’s done in the hope that the person being pursued just decides it’s not worth the hassle of defending and just settles out of court so that they can get on with their current album writing/recording, touring, or whatever else it is they’d rather be doing. In a lot of these cases it’s really nothing less than a good old fashioned shakedown, and I can’t help but think a lot of the ‘artists’ are put up to it by the music industry’s own take on ambulance chasing lawyers. No win, no fee. Hello. I’m calling about some chords you recently used. Is that right. Did you recently use chords? Er, yes. Great. I’ve just heard that someone else did. For no money up front, and just a split of the robbery, er, rights, I’ll get them to admit they used the same chords as you and give us the royalties. Great. Thanks. One further question. When you did these chords, did you also use words? Er, yeah. Wonderful. Open and shut case. We file tomorrow, and by the day after that, every songwriter in the world will wish they never bothered writing any songs in the first place. Because, well, if anyone with a pen and a musical instrument can ‘prove’ they didn’t actually write them without copying and can now take all their money, what’s the point anymore?

And that, my friends, is what Ed Sheeran, Steve Mac and Johnny McDaid have just saved us all from.

Day 40
Thursday April 7

We have so much in place. All we spoke about, all we had to do. We’ve moved countries – from England to Ireland. We’ve set up our house, with the studio. We’ve toured and learned what equipment was needed and bought it and learned how to use it. We’ve written our songs and got our performances in shape. So our rehearsal is essentially done. And that in itself has been a huge process. We’ve built the website with all the content. We have a brand. Attached to that we have new cards, beermats and posters on the way. We have The Diaries themselves, which I’m writing in as I write. So much of getting all this done has included tons of admin, and so much of the other extraneous activities involved in building a new life, while working on extrications from the previous one, and getting the house and travelling bits all in order. We’ve done all that too. The album is on the way now and we’re on that in the studio. The Diaries are taking care of themselves right now although yes, publication of them at some point is on the cards and that will add another layer to the to do list what that comes about. But right now, our activity has boiled down to a very simple equation as we seek to start to build our presence in Ireland – our local(ish) area then beyond. Book a gig, play the gig, talk to the people before and after.

And we’ve concluded, after what we’ve discovered on the ground, that we should concentrate on our own midlands area and the surrounding areas of Dublin, especially the towns just outside it. Afterall, half an hours drive from Clara and you’re practically in Dublin.

Mark:

Now we feel ready to begin recording our debut album, it’s time to make a phone call we’ve been wanting to make for some time. It’s time to call a producer. I’ve had a guy in mind and we pretty much know what we want from him. His name is Steve, he lives in Madrid, and he was one of a two man production team who I worked with when putting together the Drunken Monkees album. Following that I was in a blues band with him for the better part of two years – the two years preceding The Costa Blanca Diaries which kicked off Mark’s Diaries and the whole Diary thing. It was while working with him that I began the total reinvention of myself as a bass player and, I suppose as a musician.

Maja is really getting hold of the production side of things and I have a fair idea of the process too, so we’re not looking so much for a hands on producer. We can do the heavy lifting and big brush strokes ourselves in terms of getting raw tracks down and getting them to sound somewhat serviceable. Really what we need is someone who can advise us about being more effective as we put this thing together, and then put the finishing touches to it all when everything is done. We put the call in and have a great chat as we talk for the first time in years and he and Maja meet – on the phone – for the first time. During this call we get it all sorted out. We will record two or three tracks as well as we can – probably two – send them to him and he will tell us what we could look at to get them to another level. We’ll then make any improvements needed before taking that knowledge and applying it to the rest of the recording process, getting his views, opinions and guidance along the way. Then, when the whole thing is done, he’ll cast his eye over the full job and polish it all off until we have the finished product. That’s the working theory, he’s well on board and we’re all totally clear with what we have to do.

Now, before we begin the actual recording proper, we’re taking a trick from the Metallica playbook. What they’ve often done before the actual sessions is to record covers to test and get used to any new equipment and maybe personnel. That way they don’t waste time or creative energy going through this with material they plan to actually use. For our version, we’ve decided to record Oasis’ Supersonic. Not for any kind of release, but just to get used to all the toys and tools so that we can hit the ground running when the real production begins. Tomorrow we have our first gigs since returning to Ireland, so the first gigs of what is essentially our Ireland tour, then the next day we’ll begin work on recording our album, starting with pre production.

Day 42
Saturday April 9

Two gigs today. Two. About ten minutes drive apart on the western coast at the top of country Clare. It’s a drive of two and a half to three hours and in the vicinity, we have the famed cliffs of Moher – Liscannor, where we’re playing our first show at Joseph McHugh’s, is the closest village to the cliffs, just four kilometres away. One of the joys of touring and wide range gigging is the opportunity if offers for sightseeing and this area is apparently one of the most spectacular in Ireland, which is of itself renowned for its overall spectacular landscapes, most of all the coast regions of enormous number. So yeah. I’m quite excited about the prospect of finally getting to the cliffs of Moher. I never made it there when I lived here before.

The cliff chain runs for about 14 kilometres and raise to a maximum height of 700 feet – a little over 200 metres, with even the lower regions coming in at well over 100 metres. From these vantage points you can see the Aran Islands and a whole bunch of mountains over in Galway. As such, you might not be surprised to learn that they’re Ireland’s top attraction, pulling in around one and a half million visits per year.

We have this wonderful romantic vision of driving up to the edge of the cliffs and being able to contemplate the far below pounding Atlantic while running through a few warmup songs. You know, the kind of thing you might see bands do in videos which look quite amazing, but have no bearing in reality. But yeah. We are going to go do that reality.

Or so we think.

When we arrive in the general area, we discover the whole thing has been somewhat commercialised and that simply driving up to the cliffs and looking after yourself isn’t a thing. Instead you have to park in the visitor carpark which has a charge, and then there’s the whole ‘Cliffs of Moher experience.’ It looks like it’s a whole daytrip thing rather than just come and briefly hang out thing. That’s not part of any of our plans at all. So we decide to forget about this part of it all and just go park near the venue and have a little play there. We’re still on the coast, so we’re still able to find a lovely seaside spot to park up, get the guitar out and have our planned little warmup play in the car, with the front seats reclined all the way back to give ourselves a little more room. We spend a little time leisurely working through a few songs, then rest a little bit more, then we’re ready to drive the last few metres to the venue before heading in to set up.

It’s to a slightly bemused clientele that we roll in and begin to prepare ourselves. But we have been afforded a really good space to play in. A whole wall area directly opposite the bar. Up to the bar and over to the left, unseen around the corner, a small group of men is gathered. Once we have set up somewhat organised, I take myself round there and introduce us with cards, and they seem quite warmly welcoming and intrigued as to what we’re going to do. While I’m doing this, Maja takes the right hand side of the bar and introduces us over there and we then both make our way across the bar area itself before meeting in the middle. Right back to the very first days in Berlin, then onto Hamburg, we realised that it was a good idea to let people know this will be a short show, and one of originals only, and generally give people some kind of idea of what we’re about. That done, we return to our stage area to continue preparation. As we’re starting to put our equipment together, an old man comes up to me and asks if we’re going to play trad. ‘If you don’t you’ll have me to answer to,’ he says in some form of mock aggression. But he isn’t changing his stance too much and it looks like he really is expecting some kind of response and acquiescence. As we’re enjoying our mini standoff and I’m trying to explain to him that we’re only going to be doing our own stuff, no trad, a lady enters the picture, comes between us and talks gently to him, explaining what’s going on. For a start, the man also seems a bit perturbed and a little angry that we’re getting the chance to play in here when he wasn’t able to get himself booked. The lady quickly introduces herself to me as Helen, then returns her attention to him. ‘These guys have got something different going on altogether,’ she begins. ‘They’re not being paid by the bar. They’re actually very brave people just rocking up to places, doing their own thing and then passing the hat.’ He still doesn’t seem to understand and still wants to remonstrate with me but she guides him out of the back door, turning to me and saying, ‘Don’t worry. I’ll sort him out.’ Great. When she returns, san slightly confused old man, Maja’s arrived on the scene and I introduce them to each other. Helen then addresses both of us emphatically, saying, ‘I think what you guys are doing is brilliant, and just so brave. Just to have got off your backsides, created something and then started to bring it round to people who have no idea what you’re about to do, and sink and swim on your own devices, I think that’s just amazing.’ Thankyou very much. ‘You know what?’ she continues, ‘I have to go. I can’t stick around, but I’m going to put a fiver in your hat just for the pure stones you guys have to go around and do this. All fair play and respect to you. With that, she produces the promised fiver and drops it in the hat, then she hugs us both, wishing us all kinds of good luck both for tonight and beyond, and heads out the front door.

As we approach showtime, a large group of girls on a birthday night out around the towns and villages comes in. This is a thing in rural Ireland – groups of people renting a minivan for an evening and going round a whole bunch of different places. We often see such vans in Clara. A few of them, including the birthday girl, come and say hi and are very very interested in what we’re about to do. They say they’ll be up front and are really up for it. Great. Out of nowhere we have our main audience. When we start, they are exactly where they said they would be. Four or five of them starting to get into the swing of it and dancing. But the group as a whole kind of holds back and the girls dancing seem to get slowly discouraged and they fall back as well, meaning we’re playing to a mostly disinterested looking bar; the guys around the corner have stayed firmly around the corner. However, through this veil of indifference a few people really stand out for their levels of interest. A few guys sitting facing the bar have turned round and are looking at us in something resembling confused shock. Like, what the hell is this. More and more, this starts to spread about the place and now and then, one of the guys round the corner comes and has a look for a while. We’re a long way from totally winning the bar over, but people do at least seem to be listening and a few people seem to be really deep into what we’re doing but quite unsure of how to react. My take on this is that most, if not all, of the people in here have never seen a grassroots original band. Sure, they’ve probably been to a Stones or U2 concert, or seen other bands on varying rungs of the fame ladder. But right down and dirty brand new unknown acts playing their own music and songs that mostly no-one’s ever heard before? No. Don’t think so. I would say that the entirety of bar concerts anyone in here has ever seen has been coverbands. Which means they really have no idea of what to make of us. If there was to be an emphatic response, I also think that’s been a bit dampened by the more dominant personalities in the room. Maybe one or two of those guys round there are being a bit cool for school, or non comitant, so the others feel they can’t really show too much enthusiasm. Ditto for the group of girls, which seems to have totally lost interest. But none of this phases me or Maja the tiniest bit as we continue to perform as though we own the place and it’s our very own little Wembley. That’s just how you have to do it. Back down, show the slightest amount of fear, lack of confidence or hesitation and it’s all over. Keep pushing forwards and at the very least, you’ll find a way through. And so it is here, as those who are into it really seem to be picked up and transported by the way we’re totally giving them a real show, regardless of what the general feeling in the room might be. Our thoughts on all this are a little borne out by the round of pass the hat which I take on once we finish. The guys are polite enough but mostly decline, and one of them even says, ‘I’d pay to you stop.’ I don’t miss a beat or take offence. Instead, I just smile the smile and say, ‘Well, look, we stopped for free so you’re all good.’ The girls? Well, as one, they just don’t want to know at all and I don’t push it. Afterall, you can’t and shouldn’t. The hat’s there. All you can do is make people aware of it and they’re free to react in any way they want to. But out of these cold hard pockets, a few people almost seem at a rush to get to me and drop something in, and one or two even call me back when I inadvertently miss them out and start to walk off. Like we thought during the show, something has connected somewhere. OK. One down. We pack up and leave with no-one seeming to notice we’re doing so. Fair enough. Onto the next place.

We find quite a lively atmosphere at The Corner Post in Lahinch. This is a two room bar. The front is quite traditional and loung-ey, then off to the side of that through a small doorway is a much larger room, currently operating as something of a dining room for three long tables around the two walls right and left, and one at the top of the room. When we enter, Michael, the manager, says we can set up wherever we want in the lounge area. Every table is taken, and there’s just one space available which is right inside this room at the bottom of the two steps up to the dining area. However, it’s full of tables right now and Michael suggests we wait until the big group has gone and then we can put the tables in there and begin at the rough start time of 10pm. That big group is a hen night, so all girls out on the town. This request to wait until they’re leaving so we can use their space for the tables that are in our way doesn’t strike me as odd until we’re packed up and leaving at the end of the night. He’s just said we should wait until that group is gone before we start because their presence is preventing us from setting up. However, it’s because that group is here that he’s booked us in here tonight. In all the busy-ness of the evening, this little fact seems to have been forgotten. And anyway, when 10:40 rolls round and they’re still there, we decide we can’t wait any longer and move the tables into there anyway, positioning them just about appropriately with the help of the bar staff letting us know where they can and can’t go. OK. We can set up and get started now. We do this with one speaker to the right of me stage right, taking care of this room, and the other speaker to the left of Maja pointing in towards the girls. Just as we’re set up and ready to go, they all start singing Zombie by The Cranberries. Hearing this, I join on to accompany them on guitar and they react in full-on joy. With this simple call and response, they are with us. Just a few more minutes of last minute preparations and we’re all good. We’re in and the girls are up on their feet and loving it. But we’ve started far too late and they now are indeed about to leave. They manage to stick around for the second song as they wait for stragglers to be ready, but then they really are out the door. As they file past us, I’m chugging on an E chord as we enter the break of Run. We hold off on the vocals and talk to the girls as they walk past, thanking them and encouraging them to take cards. They take it all in fun and plenty of communication and thanks and warm words come back from them. But then they’re gone and we’re left playing to a tiny bar of a few patrons scattered round tables with two or three actually sat at the bar. But, just like at McHugh’s, we once again find ourselves looking into faces staring back at us in some kind of disbelief and uncertainty of how to act to what’s going on. And the applause is wonderfully warm when it comes. The bar staff are also totally into it, and when we finish, almost everyone is happy to put money in the hat that I take round. But that everyone really does not add up to very many people. But still, we’ve made something of an impression in here tonight, although I’m a little disappointed to hear that Michael wasn’t able to stick around and had to head off to meet someone. Oh well. Like the last place, we leave without organising a return date, but that’s absolutely fine. They’ll call or they won’t. In the meantime we’ve got a whole country to have a run at as we just continue to push relentlessly forwards.

Day 43
Sunday April 10

We do have plans for that relentlessness today in the form of more hustling, but after arriving home near 3am last night after two gigs and the drive, we take far more time to feel up and at it than we expected. Instead, we watch movies, and later on, get to gentle work with pre pre production as we call up Supersonic and start to learn and rehearse it.

Day 44
Monday April 11

We ordered a few things from Thomann and they arrive today. As ever, a Thomann delivery can feel a bit like Christmas, especially when you don’t remember everything you’ve ordered and that’s just what it’s like today. By the time we’ve finished and have allocated new and already existing bits and pieces to road set up and studio gear, we have two complete sets of equipment meaning we can just keep our live stuff packed and ready to go. No more need to pull down the studio, take it out, then put it back together again. All we need to do now is unhook the studio monitors to take out as live speakers, and off we go. Among all this we now have an extra speaker stand meaning we can now set up two speakers either side of us on stage for a much more professional look rather that what we have been doing which is one speaker on a stand, another on a table. And more, we also have the capability to fit all this on the trollies we have, so while we will be using the car for the foreseeable, we can still walk around with all this stuff if we have to like we did in Berlin and Hamburg.

To get all this done, we dive into a busy day going through everything we already had and everything new and splitting it all into sections, while also making sure each piece of equipment is marked to denote where it belongs, which serves the automatically dual purpose as marking it as ours for when those tricky moments can arise, such as a DJ, another band on a bill, or simply a musically well supplied venue thinking you might just innocently and accidentally be taking something of theirs. I had a very awkward situation in a previous band. We were packing our gear up when the duty manager of the bar insisted the speaker we were loading onto our trolly was theirs. This really strained polite relations for an uncomfortable ten minutes or so until someone finally remembered that one of their DJs had taken theirs home with him the previous night to fix it.

Back to today and by the time we’ve finished with our delivery we now have enough for two fully functioning studios in the house and a live setup. With this we begin setting up a whole new studio in the upstairs spare bedroom. This is where we decide most of our recording will be done. The larger downstairs studio will now be used for preproduction, and especially as a place where I can work on practicing and maybe even recording bass parts at times when Maja is in the studio upstairs.

Day 45
Tuesday April 12

Mark:

After a little studio time, as afternoon comes, we start to get ready for what will be our first real hustle day. I say this because we’re not totally counting the Clare/Galway hustle for two reasons. First, the Liscannor/Lahinch trip was based on actual leads and being able to drop a name, so at the very least they were warm rather than completely cold calls. And second, because Galway wasn’t so much a hustle, more an exercise in collecting emails and phone numbers and not being able to pitch to anyone.

And I say ‘we get ready’ because we fully pack the car as if going for a gig because, should the circumstances arise, we want to be ready to play a venue there and then. Either a manager could be like, you can play tonight/now if you want, or we could actually offer it if we think the window is there. This packing of the car includes overnight provisions including an overnight bag, our blow up double mattress, and sleeping bags. Because, well, you just never know.

Our first hustle target is our nearest decent sized town of Tullamore, the biggest town in our county of Offaly.

The plan is to first ask if a bar actually does music of any kind because if it doesn’t, it’s not likely to be viable and there’s no point wasting anyone’s time. But even then, nothing is set in stone. As we make our way round the town, quite a few places don’t, and we say thankyou for your time and goodbye.

One of the places we have highest hopes for is The Goalpost where Pat plays, so at the very least we already know they have regular live music. We pop our heads in and immediately see it’s too busy for anyone to have any time to talk to us. Oh dear. It’s approaching 6pm and we may have left it too late for today. OK. Carry on.

So straight to Fergies, the main live venue of Tullamore. There, we meet Fergie himself. The bar is empty and we’re thinking, ‘Here we go.’ But he seems totally uninterested and not massively communicative and is really just like, ‘I’ll have a look and get back to you if I think it’s something I could go for.’ Fair enough I guess and maybe he’s inundated with bands, or has enough going on already, and that’s just his way of dealing with new people coming in. But we were expecting a little more, even if just a touch of engagement and interest in what we were doing. Especially when we’re able to say we don’t charge and are going for the hat approach. Maybe that’s the part he doesn’t like and it might not be for everyone. Who knows?

Just outside the door of this bar we see a poster advertising a lineup of original acts coming soon in a venue called John Lees. Which is just round the corner. Oh yes. This was already on our list but we hadn’t yet checked to see where it was. A band called Double Bill who we saw at the trap last week told us about this place. Thanks for the tip lads. We’re here now. In we go.

Oh well. The main man, John, isn’t in. It’s suggested we try again after eight.

Another few bars with no managers in sight. This is starting to get slightly frustrating.

We decide it could be time to see if The Goalpost has calmed down. It has. A little. The barman points the manager, Darren, out to us who is out in the bar, and we go and introduce ourselves. He Politely listens to our pitch and, when we’ve finished, says, ‘You can’t argue with that.’ It’s a wonderfully casual and encouraging acceptance. He asks us to leave details and says he could possibly put us on the weekend after next. Thankyou very much. We’ll say no more and see how that pans out.

Onto the next town, which we’ve selected as Moate. This journey takes us all the way back to Clara, and through the other side.

As we arrive and take in the small town, which is comparable in size to our own Clara, we see that there are three possible bars. Peadars, Egans and The Gap House. While Clara is a town centred around a few streets and something of an identifiable shape, Moate is one of those towns you see so often in Ireland which consists of one single, long street on something of a main road with constant fast traffic passing through it, all using it simply as a place to go through to get somewhere else.

Peadars’ outside advertising makes it very clear this is a bar for live music, so we feel quite good as we go in. Once more we discover no manager is in, but the bargirl Anita is open to us and seems really interested in what we have to say and says she will let the manager know. Great

Egans is a small looking place, but when we go in it’s surprisingly big. No manager again, but the girl who introduces herself as Rachel thinks the manager could well be interested. Again, OK.

Now we go for The Gap House, a really quite large looking place right at the end of the town with the main road shooting off either side of it. We enter and find ourselves in the front bar which is quite sparse of furniture on its pristine wooden floors. There are two guys sitting at the bar and one behind it. We go and ask the barman if they ever have music and he politely says that no they don’t. No worries at all. Thankyou for your time, we will bid you good day. Maja walks out and I follow. But then I quickly turn around and decide to introduce ourselves to the patrons and barman anyway and give them cards, just because. These are accepted with some degree of well graced bemused amusement with a touch of genuine curiosity. I then ask the barman’s name and he gives it as Dennis. Lovely. Thankyou and goodbye. We leave again. Maja is out first again. ‘Do you charge at all?’ Dennis calls out to our backs. I turn round. ‘No we don’t. We only play half hour shows then we pass a hat around and see what happens. ‘Oh,’ he says. ‘In that case you could probably come back and do something one night when I might know I could have a few in.’ Oh wow. A possible gig out of absolutely nowhere. And we were on our way when the window opened. ‘That would be wonderful,’ says Maja. ‘Great,’ says Dennis. Leave it with me and I’ll give you a call sometime.

As we walk out into the street and the door swings shut behind us we collapse in fits of hysterical laughter. I have never, never experienced anything like that in a bar hustle before.

As we return to the car, we notice a poster for a craft beer festival in this town sometime in July and it will include live music. Cool. Another contact to add to the list. I cross over the road and jot down the details. We will be in touch.

Now we’re off to the one bar village of horseleap. One bar. Does that qualify it as a village? No idea. Anyway, that’s where we’re going now. We arrive and see it’s not just one bar, it’s also one shop, with both places housed in the same building and run by the same person. Literally. Behind the bar we meet Brida who is happy to hear our pitch for what we have to offer. As we’re talking to here, there’s a tinkle and we realise someone’s walked in the other door outside and has entered the shop. Brida excuses herself and disappears off to the side of the bar. Oh, she is now behind the counter of the shop. It’s the same counter. This side looks like a bar and that side looks like a shop counter. But it’s the same piece of construction. Only in a place like this. She comes back and we chat for a little while and she says that yes they do have music occasionally, and yes, there could be room for us, but she has no idea when that could be just yet. OK. Positive. Maybe something to think of for the future. We thank her for her time and leave it there. Yeah, we could do something in here if we catch it at the right time.

We need to go shopping which means we need to go back to Tullamore. Which just happens to coincide with the little after 8pm time when we were told the main man would be in John Lees. As we enter the town we notice a large bar on the edge of it that we’ve driven past many times. Large enough to have its own car park. Why the hell not? We stop and walk in. It really is quite big and split into two more or less equally sized bars with the front door giving you the option to go left or right into either one of them, and they’re joined again at the back by a little walkway, creating a kind of circle. A social circle, if you will.

It’s quiet and the bar girl we speak to says that yes, the bosses are in and that she can introduce us to them. She leads us into the opposite bar to the one we’re in now and points out two people sitting on the public side of it, right at the far end. Thankyou. We go down and introduce ourselves to them. They are Gordon and Maria, and they listen attentively as we give them our pitch. They look at each other, have a silent conference, and then Gordon says, ‘Why not? When would you be thinking of?’ We have a think and the four of us settle on this Friday. So that’s it. Just like that, Gig booked.

Back out in the carpark and we’re giddy with the excitement of a result in a bar we really weren’t considering and not one person has mentioned to us as a possibility.

Now we have John Lees, which is on the way as we head to the supermarket. We’re met by the barman who happily takes us out back to meet the man himself, and oh, this is a much bigger place than we expected. We’re to discover it’s three venues in one. The front bar, the really quite large covered beer garden area, and yet another small venue complete with stage in a room leading directly from that. John shows us it all as we talk about who we are and he tells us about the kinds of events the place has. They include a Ukraine benefit concert coming up next Friday – the 22nd. He says he’s happy to chat to the guy organising that to see if he could find a spot for us. Probably a 15 minute show for us. If that bill is full, John says he’d be prepared to organise another day we could play to see how we go and take it from there. Like our man Darren at The Goalpost said, can’t argue with that.

We know there’s been a lot there to take in, so to recap, out of today’s hustle, this is what we’re looking at.

15th April – this Friday: The Lantern
Friday 22nd April: possibly John Lees
Saturday or Sunday 23/24th April: possibly The Goalpost

There are also call-back possibilities to venues showing at least some kind of interest.

Peadars, Egans, and The Gap House of Moate.

Paddy Ryans of Horseleap, although we’ll probably just leave that one and see.

And a festival event to get on to.

Day 46
Wednesday April 13

We have another delivery today. This time our stationary, which means we have new cards, a whole more ton of beermats, and posters. And stickers, and now even one of those ink stamp things for The Diaries. Very cool. We decide this is a perfect opportunity to go visit a few venues we’ve chatted with to maybe give them a bit of a nudge. First stop is The Lantern in Tullamore, which we’re playing on Friday. So they have our first posters now.

Walking through the town on our way to The Goalpost we bump into our musician friend Pat. He’s with a couple of friends and introduces us to them as rockstars. ‘These guys are badass,’ he adds. Absolutely fair enough and taken. He was one of the first people to tell us that we were wasting our time trying to play originals with no covers at all. Now he’s all, ‘Go for it guys,’ and introducing us as rockstars. Feels like a turnaround of acceptance.

Now into The Goalpost, again, ostensibly to drop off beermats, and posters just so they have them to hand should we be booked. Seeing what we’ve brought, Darren says, a little gleefully and with a touch of, what the hell do we have here, ‘You guys really aren’t messing around are you?’ Nope. We most definitely are not. With that, Maja declares to him, ‘We are going to be famous. We just are.’ Darren looks on with a smile and a wry shake of the head that says, ‘That might just be true.’

When we arrive for the drop at John Lees, John is there and immediately greets us, saying, ‘Have you seen my email?’ We explain we’ve been out for a while, and that no, we haven’t. ‘No problem,’ he says. ‘I’ve spoken to the organiser and you guys are on the bill for that show next Friday.’ Not only that, but it emerges that our 15 minute slot is at 11:30, the last performance of the night with the whole thing beginning at eight. Our very first bone fide headline show. ‘So we’ve got you booking in for that and we’ll see how it goes,’ he says. Brilliant. Just brilliant.

Tullamore done and it’s back out to Moate to to do the same drop of posters and have a cheeky chase-up there.

The first place we pop into is Peadars, where Anita is once more behind the bar. Shesays the manager isn’t there today either, but that’s fine as we tell her we’re just here to drop off these bits and pieces that just arrived today. The bar was empty last time we were here, but there are four people in here today enjoying a quiet drink and they all throw us a hello as we walk in. This makes it slightly easier for us to do what we sometimes do on the hustle which is to say hi to customers and give them a card.

We carry the guitar around everywhere now when we’re out and about like this. First, when we’re out and taking all our gear, because, well, you never know, the guitar doesn’t fit into the boot. So for security reasons we don’t want to leave it lying around all obvious in the car. But secondly, we bring it along anyway for its conversation starter potential and again because, well, you never know.

This turns into one of those ‘You never know’ situations. As we’re thanking Anita and making our way out the door, one of the four people says, ‘Are you really leaving without getting that guitar out giving us a song?’ You see what I mean? Well, what can you say to that? I guess we can. The other three customers instantly become more animated, with one of them even calling out, ‘I hope you’ve brought a hat.’ Oh yes, we have. Yep. We carry that everywhere with us too. Because, well, you never know.

There is a little table area that musicians usually use in the corner opposite the bar, but we’re not going to use it. Instead, it just becomes somewhere to store the guitar case. We have two people sitting at the right of us at this end of the bar, a guy at the other end and, opposite, the man who first suggested we should play, seated at a table near the door. Me and Maja have a quick conference wondering what to play and go for Rock’n’Roll Tree. As we begin, I gently nudge Maja forwards, whispering at the same time for her to do so. And so she does. So Maja is now pretty much on her own standing right in the middle of the bar with me a little behind. This reason for this is to put her closer to the people so that she can be heard better above the guitar because, well, she doesn’t sing massively loud and this is a big song and there’s only so much I can reduce its volume. The guys and lady in here immediately go for the song, reacting to each dynamic change with increasing delight. A minute or so in and a few phones are out filming us, one of them being held by Anita behind the bar who is looking on joyously. By the time we come to the climactic end, at least two of of our small audience are off their seats dancing, and the cheers and applause make it sound like we’ve just played a far bigger room. We react to them with thrilled laughter and profuse thanks and I make to put the guitar away. ‘What do you think you’re doing?’ I hear someone call out. You’re not putting that away now. At least one more.’ Yes. More, come calls from all around the bar. ‘I can’t,’ says Maja almost silently to me. ‘My voice won’t do another one like that. Not without an amp.’ Well, what about a low key one? OK. We’re not convinced a quiet song is the best way to proceed, but it’s all we’re going to be able to manage so after a bit of a conference we settle on Smile Is Going Round. This song began life as something of an upbeat mid tempo-er but after it was dropped from the set, I suggested we give it a go as a more sultry number. Before we were halfway through that experiment, we knew we had accidentally unearthed a new keeper. That was a magical rehearsal moment. Now we pull this version out for the first ever time. The effect truly is magical as me and Maja take turns to switch sides in the bar, walking around the place and around each other. As we do, the regulars come and join us, taking turns to dance with each one of us, with one particular moment seeing Maja swaying with one of the guys while I dance with the lady as she has an arm draped round my shoulder.

The Diaries has seen quite a few moments that a Hollywood script editor would have thrown out, and this surely has to be added to them. Two people walk into a bar with a guitar. Get cajoled into playing, then the whole bar gets up and dances with them to songs they’ve never heard before. Oh come on, says script editor. But here we are and that exact thing is happening. We finish to rapturous applause with each person almost rushing to shake our hands or give us a hug. And we get all their names. Pauline and Eamon this end of the bar, or at least they were when we started. John down the other end, and that was Frank who got it all started, and he very vocally claims the credit now and rightly so.

During the wonderful aftermath I’m mentally debating whether or not to bring the hat out. Afterall, we have only played two songs. While I’m still going through this in my mine, Maja picks it up and goes with it. Oh. OK. It’s happening then. There is one mild, slightly jokey protestation that this isn’t quite the Irish way of doing things, but Maja doesn’t back down. And the protest is half hearted at most, and possibly not even really meant at all as every single person drops money into the hat. I think it was possibly more of a surprise, and then they maybe thought, well, why not. Within this, Maja asserts herself saying, ‘This is what we do.’ And I add my bit that the record companies take most of the money and streaming barely pays anything to start with. But this does pay apparently. And we get to keep it all.

Hat done and questions start about who we are and where we came from, and we delight in tag teaming each other as we fill them in on our story and their collective heart melts a little more with each extra detail. Then Anita drops in with, ‘I’ll be sure to tell the boss about this. Hopefully he’ll have you in for a show.’ Hopefully.

Soon after that we say our goodbyes and head out across the road to the car, laughing and shaking our heads in total euphoric disbelief as Maja says, ‘We might just be the first people ever to drop into a pub for 20 minutes and leave with more money than we went in with.’

Now onto The Gap House. A little disappointingly Dennis isn’t there so we speak with bargirl Sarah instead and ask if we can leave a poster and beer mats with her. She’s a little confused, but is like, er, OK.

Next it’s back into Egans where we find the one barman standing in the middle of the bar chatting to the few people who are in – one guy at the bar and two people at each of the two tables opposite the bar. He says he’s not the manager but he’s happy to talk. Talk music? Well, we have regular people and that’s it really. What if we’re not charging but want to do our own thing for half an hour and pass a hat round? Oh. OK. When would you like to do that? Whenever really. Next Thursday, he offers. Just come in whenever, he suggests breezily. And just like that, job done.

Back home and we decide to go to the trap for one or a few. Once in there and comfortably seated at the bar, we say hi to a few lads and they give a big enthusiastic hi to Maja as it’s the first time they’ve seen her since that first show in here. While we’re chatting, one of them, called Steve, tells us about a bar called Gussies 5km down the road in the village of Ballycumber that has an open mic style thing on Sundays from 6-8. He says he’ll be there with his friends, and now, so will we.

Later on, the bosses, Jimmy and Angela drop by for a drink. I leave Maja with the people we’re chatting to and show them the new beer mats and ask if we can leave a few. No problem. And they them and want to know where we got them printed. Maja’s been on that so I say I’ll go and get her for them. So go back to the table and Maja disappears to chat to Jimmy and Angela for a while. It really goes on a while as I see them in deep conversation. When she comes back, she says, we got it organised. We’re playing here Wednesday May 11. Wow.

So this is where we are and what we have now.

Home recording studio
Home rehearsal/pre production studio
Car packed with overnight needs
Fully portable road gear
A producer to guide us
A website
Pre production underway on our debut album with actual production imminent.
New beer mats, new cards and posters, with a bunch of all three out in a load of bars
An income. An actual income. Not enormous amounts, but we have now proved that can actually generate real hard currency money playing live with our own songs

A few new gigs in the diary from today:

The Lantern, Tullamore, this coming Friday.
Egans, Moate, Thursday 21st April
John Lee’s, Tullamore. Confirmed for our first headline show Friday 22nd April
Gussies, Ballycumber: a new open mic thing, whatever it turns out to be for this Sunday
The Trap booked for Wednesday 22nd May
And money that we didn’t have when we left, from the hat from a mini show we got asked to play on the spot. Which means a show played out of nowhere today can be added to the list above.

Oh, one thing before we leave this entry. While we were in The Trap, my phone rang. At first I thought it was the manager from Peadars calling to book us. But no. It was the guy from Egans, apologising massively, saying he’d jumped the gun, had spoken to his boss since we left, and the boss had nixed the show, saying their’s was purely a trad bar. Paul can’t apologise enough, but I tell him it’s all cool, and add that I really appreciate him letting us know. So, while you’re here, you can go up to that list and just cross that gig off.

Day 47
Thursday April 14

With a live performance yesterday and four more assured – with a fifth that quickly went by the wayside – we take a day off hustling to concentrate on Diary writing, which has been massively neglected lately, and to get some real mileage in the studio. But a maker’s gonna make, a ballers gonna ball and a hustler’s gonna hustle. Late on we decide to go for a decent sized shop at one of those edge of town supermarkets that Tullamore has. One of them, bizarrely, has a pub at its edge. It’s not so much a pub with a carpark, as a carpark that just happens to have a pub. Apart from being massively curious as to what this kind of pub could be like, we also look at each other and are like, why not? It’s a bar, we’re here, they can only say no. It also has a sign at the door that says it has music. OK. In we go and the barman calls the manager over who seems to be off duty and having a drink with friends. But she still comes and is happy to hear what we have to say. Her name is Jenny, she is absolutely lovely with us and personally very interested in our story and what we’re doing. But she says the customers wouldn’t be. This, she explains, is one of those bars where people come for a quiet drink and know that’s what they’re getting when they choose a bar like this. They wouldn’t thank anyone who rocked up and, well, rocked. I totally get this. As much as I love my live music and have often sought out original bands, if I wanted to chat to a friend or friends, and just chat, we would steer ourselves away from potentially louder places and choose that one over there that never had any live music. If someone then came in and proceeded to do the music thing live, I know we wouldn’t be impressed, even if we were impressed. So Jenny is purely reflecting her business and all good. But I really feel we make a big impression on her and Maja doesn’t hesitate to give her a few cards. We leave with all her good wishes, and feeling like we’ve once more left with something on the table. If you’re trying to spread by word of mouth, and where we are, we feel that’s the most powerful tool you can have, we’ve once more put that word out. Jenny, just thankyou for listening. Sometimes that in itself can be good enough.

Day 48
Friday April 15

When we were being told to please please not attempt to play original songs to coverband audiences, they’ll throw things at you, please don’t do it, lads, I’m telling ya, you’ve got to throw a couple of covers in or they’ll eat you alive, I think The Lantern in Tullamore would have been pretty high on anyone’s mind. Right on the edge of town, it’s a pub for 50-something year old hard men who want to play pool and watch sport. And maybe once in a while get in touch with their more sensitive side by waving their hands in the air to Sweet Caroline while making sure not to touch anyone else’s hand. It is not a place you go into and try to sing your own songs. It just isn’t. Which, of course, is exactly what we’re going there to do tonight. ‘Don’t do it lads,’ I can almost hear as we walk in the door. To be fair, our initial experience is to be greeted with nods of friendliness and a few murmurs of at least appreciation as we park up right next to the door and start loading the gear in. We enter the cavernous room on the right hand side of the bar and yep, there’s live soccer on the telly. The most popular thing in here is the pool table, and there are a few guys hanging round still wearing their hi-vis tops. Over in the other bar are two large tables hard at playing poker. I’m only assuming it’s poker. At the very least, it’s a card game requiring serious, silent and slightly menacing levels of concentration. Yep. We wrote some songs that we’re going to play in here tonight.

From all this, Gordon looks up and welcomes us with a generous smile. Like quite a few people before him, he’s given us this gig without even having heard us. I don’t know what must be going through his mind, but he’s bright and positive and interested to hear how we’ve been getting on and seems genuinely please when we tell him we have our first headline gig, also in Tullamore, for next week.

We feel the curiosity levels rise all over the place as we set up in the corner showing nothing but quiet assuredness and confidence. You really can’t overestimate how much this can be as important as any performance. Show fear or nerves in the centre of all this and you can be done before the first song starts. Show total confidence and people might just sit up and think, ‘Oh, OK. Let’s see what we have here.’ Seeing what they have here is exactly what the guys and ladies in this place do. They give us at least that, and show amusement and some decent level of interest as we do our pre show thing of handing out cards and letting people know what we’re about to do in here.

You really don’t want to show your hand too much at an originals gig, but that’s tricky when you have to soundcheck in front of everyone, which is what we do now, with the jukebox still on – Gordon did offer to turn it off but we said it was fine. This is a very important element of the night. We don’t want to go on too long and start annoying people and lose them before the first song, but we also have to get it right. To that end, for the first time, we begin by just soundchecking with the monitor that is only facing us. Get the mix right in there, then turn on the speakers. Here, I ask Gordon to let me know if things get too loud, and I play guitar at the highest levels of volume I can manage while Maja gently turns up the dial. I stop it at a pretty decent place and glance over to Gordon at the pool table, and he winks an approval. Great. Get some vocals in there and make sure they’re high enough in the mix. We’re done. See you in a few.

Gig time and everyone is holding their positions. Backs to us at the bar. Coldly concentrating on the next pool shot. We just launch straight in. A four count and I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). This has them going straight away and ears perk up and people at least half turn towards us. The pool guys are nudging each other just ever so slightly to maybe pay a little attention. And there we are, smashing and rocking it out and acting as though the bar’s full of a crowd that came out tonight to see nothing but us and wanting a show. Maja’s hair is flying all over the place and she’s roaring at the ceiling. Next to her, I’m pounding away on the guitar like I’m trying to break up a road. In perfect time and rhythm of course. When we finish, it’s to cheers, shouts and a very insistent applause. We say nothing. Right into the next one. Rock’n’Roll Tree. And on and on it goes. Run really gets people going tonight, more than it ever has, Beanie Love really has them smiling and some actually bouncing with us. In between all this, Gordon walks past us and drops what is actually a performance fee into the hat. We’ve actually just been paid. For the first time. Not a bar manager kindly dropping a personal fiver in. An actual decent standard rate for a regular bar band. After this, Fire. Oh, Fire. Pardon the pun, but this is a gentle slow burn that asks an audience to just trust you and hop on for the ride and see where it goes. By the time we get to it, they’re ready and prepared to at least see which direction this thing is headed in. It’s a quiet opener and I take my cue from Victor Wooten, and his lesson that sometimes it isn’t volume that gets people to listen, but lack of it. I dial back as far as I can on the gentle arpeggiation of the earlier stages of this song and the bar falls into the sudden quietness we’ve brought upon the place. We have them. We really have them. This song builds. And falls back, and then builds again to climax in a burning adrenaline rush. When the final rush hits and then pitches into silence, the bar erupts. Oh wow. If ever there was a crowd that epitomised the kind of crowd we thought we could come and play to where few others would even attempt, this is the one. And, right from the beginning, back in London, we had the confidence that we could win such a room over. Before we even had a single song written. And here we are. We’re even point blank refusing requests to play this or that song, or to have this or that person come up and sing with us. We’re here to do our thing and that’s he end of it. We smile and we’re polite. But firm and clear. We play originals. No covers, no singalongs. The message is received and respected as what could have become demands just shrink back and cease.

After the gently epic intermission of Fire, it’s onto Six Sense Lover, brand new song How You Rock’n’Roll, then the frenetic, almost metal sounds of My Game My Rules, which we attack like we never have before, with Maja spitting the words out with a new fury of viscious, daring threat. And the finale, we just howl it into the air and up at the full moon that we know is out there looking down on us tonight. As we finish and collapse in a pool of sweat and heavy breathing like a distance runner coming off the last tortured strait, the bar picks up where we left off, filling the room with sound and at least some cry of ‘Encore.’ The call isn’t insistent enough though, so we decline to continue. But hey, encore definitely got called and we’ll take that.

We feel we’ve passed quite a few of the sternest tests tonight. Now for the final one. The hat. Which has already seen some action with a few people stepping forwards and making a drop. I make special care to go to them first and express my appreciation. Now I head off round the rest of the place and each group I approach opens up, lets me in, then closes around me as everybody puts in. Everybody. Some even cajole friends to get their wallets open. There’s a mood of triumph in here and handshakes are all around with people also keen to chat briefly and ask how we’ve been getting on generally and when we’ll be back next.

When I get back to Maja, she’s busy chatting to a few guys who’ve come over and hands me one of our beer mats. It contains a handwritten message and her autograph, and now I’m requested to add mine. We’re told, ‘You guys are going to be something, and this will be going behind the bar for everyone to see that you were here.’ Oh wow. We even have a private party request and we negotiate a provisional fee that any professional band would be happy to accept. Whether or not they follow through is irrelevant and we suspect they won’t. But they were impressed and interested enough to ask and we’re delighted with that.

Now, those beer mats. We’ve just had them redone and we deliberately made the open space on them clearer to make it possible to autograph. A massively presumptuous move, but really, it felt anything but. And here we are, on our first full gig since receiving them, and we are indeed being asked for our autographs.

Once we’re all packed up, it takes a while for us to be able to leave. It’s all hand shakes and hugs and, for Maja, huge hugs. A few even tell me how refreshing it is to hear someone doing their own thing, that all they usually hear are the same songs by different people. Didn’t see that one coming. And then we’re home. We’ve only played a half hour show so it’s still nowhere near last orders. We unload the car into the downstairs studio and before we know it, we’re back out the door again and down to The Trap where we grab our massively appreciated post gig beer and just sit there in a daze as we try to take in what we’ve just done.

Maja:I just want to write a little of my experiences

Day 49
Saturday April 16

Mark:

We wake up still a little overwhelmed about last night. The biggest thing we feel is vindication. Everything we thought we could do when we started has just been done. We always knew we could. But actually doing it. Actually going through the experience and coming out the other side like that is a whole different thing. A relief? A triumph? No. The word really is vindication. But really, you know, you know and you know. But until you really do, all you truly have is belief in yourself. Hard, cold, unshakeable belief maybe, but at the end of the day, it’s still only belief. Now it’s actual, total knowledge.

We’ve walked into a cold solid coverband bar with our own music and were met with, well you saw it just like we did. Cheers, encore shouts, autographs and payment. But as much confidence as we’ve always had, getting autograph requests in such a venue this early in the game was never a part of even our most optimistic vision.

Now we feel, for the very first time, that we have a few shows coming up with no weight on them. Open mic tomorrow, whatever that really is, then headlining with four songs in original venue next week. And it’s Easter weekend now so the bars will be busy so we can’t even get out and hustle.

Day 50
Sunday April 17

Into Ballycumber and Gussies for tonight’s open mic. What will this be all about? For a start, we see that Gussies is one of three bars on a short stretch of road. So surely it’s not going to be full of guys and girls rocking up with their guitars like what we saw in Berlin. We’ve arrived a little early and are enthusiastically greeted by the already slightly busy bar. All stools at the bar itself are taken, so we order cups of tea and take a table by the window.

While we’re there we work on what will become something of a mission statement for our website and ‘donate’ button. We hammer it out for a while until it looks like this:

This is what we do

We believe society wants and needs new music that comes from the heart

However, most hits are now written by using algorithms

We don’t have a record deal yet, but then, most record companies keep most of the money anyway and then find ways to take the rest

Streaming pays next to nothing

Bars generally don’t pay original acts, but we understand and have no problem with that

Which is exactly why we have the hat

Please think of the Donate button as the online equivalent of the hat and help keep us on the road

Just before 7pm, Emmet, the man of the night comes in, sees our guitar and comes and says hi. We ask about what’s going on and it very quickly becomes clear that this isn’t quite an open mic in the way we might imagine such a thing. Instead, it’s more an open trad session where you have the performers, or in this case, the performer, and people are welcome to sit in at the table with them, or now and then, people might be free to do their own thing, maybe as in the case of an open mic, so I can see the overlap. I’ve always known trad sessions operated kind of like this. It’s just that we weren’t totally sure what we were walking into was essentially a trad session, just a one man affair. And a very popular one; as soon as 7pm nears round the doors barely stop opening as more and more people come until there’s hardly any room left in the place. He starts and it is indeed all Irish ballads and rebel songs. Fair enough. But we don’t really fit into this. But Emmet’s game and a few songs in he invites us to do our thing. Just like we did in Peadars in Moate last week, we don’t accept the invitation to take the performers’ spot. Instead we do the whole perform out on the floor thing, with me and Maja again moving around the place, around each other and at times just moving as one. We play two songs and we do get a pretty decent response, but we also feel that people aren’t totally sure how to take us and our in your face approach. But, much like Clare a few weeks ago, it’s clear that within the slightly bewildered uncertainty, some people are massively into it, especially a small group of guys over in the corner at the end of the bar. We finish and take a seat and order a couple of cokes and settle back to hear what else Emmet has got in his locker. We feel we’ve given a good account of ourselves and have at least been appreciated if not quite fully embraced. Maybe we were just too up, loud and brash. If so, fine. That won’t make us back down at all. But maybe we’ve judged a bit too quickly about how we were judged. About ten to fifteen minutes later and we’re starting to be asked why we’ve put the guitar away. Surely we’re going to do more. As encore shouts go, it’s the most benign I’ve ever heard. We smile politely and say thanks for the encouragement, but encouragement turns to insistence. Come on. You’re not done. Get up and do some more. I’m almost apologetic as I catch Emmet’s eye and say, ‘Are you OK with us getting up again?’ No problem, he says. But we’ve decided to play more to what the room might want this time and give them something slower, laid back, but maybe just a little intense. We go for Insanity, a song we love but which isn’t in our big smash set. Everyone’s talking as we stand in the middle of the bar and start, totally unamplified. Maja doesn’t even begin to attempt to sing over the noise. Instead, she starts so quietly even I can’t hear her. But a line or two in and the bar starts to quieten down, until all that can be heard is Maja’s gentle delicate voice and my softly arpeggiated guitar. A few people even start to talk a little again but are quickly asked not to by their friends. By the time we finish, it’s fair to say talking has resumed a little, but everyone is still with us and we get the warmest of applauses.

Trad audiences, it seems, are lovely to us and give us a fair crack, but something about us might not connect with them quite so much. And that’s fair enough. Which is why that guy booked us the other day in Moate before it was suggested to him that he might want to reconsider. Now, this isn’t going to make us run scared from trad bars and we’ll happily play any time the opportunity presents itself but tonight’s experience has shown us that if we see a trad bar, maybe we shouldn’t try to book our own show there. We can all still be friends, but it’s possible we should just respect each others’ space even as our spheres occasionally collide. They totally have their thing going on and when they go to it, they expect to see, well, their thing. And maybe, just maybe, a touch of us as well.

However, we have made one little mistake that we will learn from. We gave out beermats and cards before we played. Sometimes this is the right thing to do, but in an open situation like this where keeping the audience informed is not our responsibility, possibly not. What it means now that we have no reason to go round the bar and up to people again. Oh well.

Maja: My recording experiences

Day 51
Monday April 18

It’s two O’Clock in the morning and we’ve only just begun the talking.

I’ve had an idea for a few days a new concept for the website and have been developing wording to go with it. I introduced it to Maja last night during the trad session and, there and then, before Emmet arrived, wrote the first draft on our shared web folder. She gets up at 2am and starts fiddling on the computer to make this new thing work. Then, after a few hours sleep, at 5am we’re both at it as the wording gets refined and she returns to the website to also refine the aesthetics.

What this is all about is putting some wording on our ‘Donate’ button. I feel quite strongly about the word donate. It suggests giving to a charity, or giving because you feel generous, or just, really, the problem is with that word too. Giving. Afterall, when you go to a shop and pick up some milk, the money you give to the cashier is not a donation. When you go to a concert, you don’t donate in return for a ticket. And when we used to go and buy albums and CDs, even the record companies paid their bands royalties. These were not donations. So we’re putting our work out for free consumption if that’s how anyone wants it – this very Diary you’re reading now. Our live shows. Our album, which we’re working on right now. All there to just be taken and no problem. But this is what we do. And to sustain it, to make it realistic, money has to come from somewhere. OK, from a record company/ record deal or the joke income, er, stream, of streaming. But there, money is coming from a public that has decided to pay for a product. Record companies pay a fraction of a fraction, and are trying, and succeeding in many cases, to take more and more from more and more of their acts’ activities. And the streaming services don’t even pretend to bother to pay. Not really. So what is a new act to do if they’re trying to be viable on their own two feet as we are? Make it for ourselves. At least that is if we’re saying we don’t want to play the industry’s game, at least not the way they’ve got it set up. Until maybe someone comes along that we actually want to work with but we are doing our best to learn the very painful lessons of so many predecessors who put it all out there for so many other people to get so rich from. People who knew about absolutely nothing about music but knew how to squeeze money, even if it meant choking the people they were squeezing from.

So yeah. The ‘donate’ button is there, and I don’t like the word, but to be fair, there really isn’t a satisfactory alternative. Support? But if someone goes to see a band and pays the demanded entry, they might be supporting them, but that payment to enter isn’t a voluntary donation because the fan cares so much about the band’s individual members’ welfare, even if they do care a little. It’s being paid because if it isn’t, the doors remain closed. So yeah. I want to kind of supercede the word, and I think it’s time our button had a bit more weight. And no, we don’t want to introduce a pay wall. I’ve thought long and hard about how to do this and, as far as we are now, this is it.

This is what we do

We believe society wants and needs new music that comes from the heart

However, most hits are now written by using algorithms

We don’t have a record deal yet, but then, most record companies keep most of the money anyway and then find ways to take the rest

Streaming pays next to nothing

Bars generally don’t pay original acts, but we understand and have no problem with that

Which is exactly why we have the hat

Please think of the Donate button as the online equivalent of the hat and help keep us on the road

Oh, and that algorithm thing. Something we’ve only recently learned about and it suddenly makes so much make sense because so much of today’s music, at least what’s topping the charts and getting all the radio play, all sounds the same. Why? Because it’s literally designed that way for maximum effect. You want to write a number one song? Have a computer analyse the current number one and write something that hits all the same buttons but doesn’t quite sound the same, but really, does. Refresh and repeat.

As well as being on it at 2am, then 5am, we’re also up again early after a little more sleep to really get onto fully organising the house which just needs those few more touches we haven’t got to since arriving back from Hamburg. The feeling here is that we are actually beginning the recording of the album today and to be fully committed to that, we want to know the space behind us is clear and free of any nagging details. We don’t want to be recording or mixing a track, while knowing a ton of housework is sitting behind us. Of course, housework is never really done, but we want to at least feel on top of it. By around 7:30pm, we feel that we really are. The place looks and feels amazing. House in order and pre production track done and lessons learned. We are really, truly ready to go.

Eight O’Clock on the button and the first actual session of album recording begins. We finish this first session two hours later with a first full rough drum track and doubled guitar track for our first song.

Day 52
Tuesday April 19

Mark:

Although we’re now in the album recording process, our thoughts are still very much on hustling and playing live. Among this, we’re also starting to think about getting ourselves more onto the original scenes around the country. This will be a totally different kind of hustle. Getting onto an original scene is more about knowing the people. Networking, really. Maybe playing open mics in the main cities and actually getting to know the promoters and other acts you could do gigs with. But for now it emails as we start to try to get ourselves onto some festivals. I’m not massively sure what can come of this as again, I believe it’s going to be who you know and what your reputation is, but emailing certainly can’t hurt. So I’m downstairs researching and sending emails on that while Maja is upstairs working on and learning more and more about music production. And in between my other bits and pieces down here, I also have the job of getting into our downstairs studio from time to time and working on pre production so that I’m ready for Maja when she needs me. Part of my pre production is determining the BPMs for the songs so that she can possibly at least lay a raw drum track for me to play to when my recording time comes, and with that, I’m also practicing recording for real down here, learning to play some of the songs to recording level, so that by the time I get upstairs, I’m as ready as I can possibly be and hopefully don’t need too many takes; unlike vocals or bass, acoustic guitar generally has to be done in one take, so a full perfect performance with very little chance for drop-ins. This can only happen if a song has a natural stop/s and you’ve at least recorded up to a stop. And all this has to be done with energy and feeling. And as we’re double tracking the guitars, I have to do it twice. So by the time you get in there, you truly do need to know what’s going on.

Studio and pitching it is today and then around 7pm we start to get ready to go hustle in Athlone, the largest town in our immediate area.

What we’ve neglected to do before setting off however, is to check if there’s are any big sport on tonight. There is. Liverpool v Manchester United, one of the biggest Premierleague fixtures of the season. Which means all the bars are far too busy for a manager to have any time to talk to us.

But we’re here so we still decide to take the opportunity to have a look around and see the inside of some of these bars for the first time. One of them is Sean’s Bar, officially recognised by The Guinness Book of Records as the oldest bar in Ireland. Of course the Guinness book had to say it was an Irish bar. But at around 1000 years old and in the most central major settlement in the country, it probably is. It’s actually known what the oldest bar in the whole world is, but I’d say this place has a pretty good claim. As such it’s about as traditional as you can get. There’s no football in here for a start and we see there’s music every night. But when Sean, the manager, happily comes out to see us, he explains they only have trad music in here. Given our experience of Sunday night, we know what that means and thank him for his time. But he has a little more to give and very generously namechecks a few bars for us that we might like to try, including The Brazen Monkey which we’ve already been in. This is a new bar, he says, so could be a good opportunity for us. Indeed, the guy we spoke to in there said as much but the manager wasn’t around. Which is the case just about everywhere else. Around 10pm and we decide to head home. But then, just at the last corner before our carpark, we see that the bar Flannerys is far quieter than it was when we first arrived and poked our heads in to see that it was packed and the soccer was blaring. Why not? Let’s pop in again and say hello. It’s right there. You never know.

Maja: I’m going to write about our performance

Past the first bar, might as well try. Davey, Lee, Paddy. Sasha behind bar. Phil. Tells us about Jimmy Stewart in Mayors, Ballycumber, and Chrissy in Dark Horse.

For possibly the fifth time in a row, dinner doesn’t happen for us until sometime after 11pm. There’s just so much going on right now and so much to do. And we’re loving it.

Day 53
Wednesday April 20

After a day in the studio we think about returning to Athlone and trying again, but having learned our lesson, we check the schedules first. Yep. Another big match on. OK. Let’s carry on where we are.

Day 54
Thursday April 21

With Maja away in Sweden for ten days from Monday and with a gig tomorrow – our first headline – we decide to forget about the hustle, just keep on hunkering down and keep at it. So again, studio and catchup on Diary writing.

Day 55
Friday April 22

As soon as we arrive at tonight’s gig at John Lee’s in Tullamore, we’re greeted at the entry with, ‘Oh, you’re The Diaries. I saw you guys last week.’ Oh hello. Yep. He was randomly at Gussies in Ballycumber when we played that mildly luke warmly received performance at the trad night. We’re to discover it was slightly warmer than that, the first clue being when he follows his introduction up with, ‘We’ve got you on last tonight because it’s pretty hard to follow what you do.’ He then gives us a bunch of drinks tokens, we have a brief chat, and then me and Maja walk into the venue looking at each other in gleeful disbelief. And what a great looking venue it is. It’s essentially a covered outdoor show. Long, very attractive beer garden with a cool booth style seating system. You won’t get wet, but it’s open to the wind and general outdoor temperature but with powerful gas heaters, the kind that shoot up that single column of fire. So it’s warm enough. Then a really great stage set up with a log panelled backdrop decorated with multicoloured flags and a poster for the event.

While we are in essence headlining what is a benefit concert for local Ukrainian refugees, some of whom are in attendance, we’re the only musical act on tonight. Everything else is comedians and poetry readings. And a magician/comedian act.

We’ve decided to come decently early to catch as much as the whole show as we can. This is to generally see what’s going on and support our fellow performers which does facilitate the hoped for hang later, but apart from that, we really do simply want to enjoy an evening of entertainment that we also happen to be part of.

We are in and out a little bit, but we catch three main sets. Ross, David and Alex.

During this, about 20 minutes to half an hour before our 11pm start time, I have a massive surprise when I recognise a few guys from the Ballycumber performance. And they recognise me too and we have a lovely hello in the back of the bar far away from the stage. My pleasant surprise at seeing some friendly faces turns to absolute shock when they say they’ve come here tonight specially to see us. After we arrived, Dave called and let them know it was us, the act from the other night, and that was it. They were on their way. Do you have any idea how hard it can be sometimes to get friends to come out and see your shows? And here are a group of lads we’ve never met, who’ve gone, ‘Hey, The Diaries are playing tonight. We should go.’ Now I learn that they were only very much passing through Ballycumber that night and decided on the spot to drop into one of the three bars in the village for just the one – and it was just the one – and we just happened to play our first set of two songs while they were there. They weren’t around when we were cajoled into playing a third, but it didn’t matter. By then they were sold. And here they are.

By the time showtime comes around, the atmosphere in here has been completely warmed up by a wonderful set of stand-up routines and at times irreverently observational poetry readings. There’s possibly even a sense of anticipation in the air as we finish setting up and prepare to launch into what will be a well paced five song set. For the tougher cover bar crowds, we play what we call our smash set. For tonight, 15 to 20 minutes, we’re going to start off with two big ones – I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) followed by Rock’n’Roll Tree before taking things right down with Fire and Insanity, then bringing it right back up again with Six Sense Lover. Fire is in our smash set as a slight gamble as it starts delicately before slow burning into something else, but Insanity really is a gentle lovely flower of a song, although it’s cutting in its observations of those who would dissuade you from following your own path. ‘What they want what they need/ They’ll give anything just to see you bleed/ Just the once then they’ll say their right… and so on.

From the very opening frantic one-two-three-four count as we kick ourselves off, this whole place is with us. And the guys who came out to see us are right at the front and wonderfully rocking away. Sitting down, but still very much rocking away. As great as the stage setup is, it is a little strange as it faces directly to that one booth opposite with the rest of the venue at stage left. So, to play to the whole place, me and Maja have to set ourselves up kind of in a line. Both of us facing diagonally but sideways with me having a perfect view of her back the entire time. But this also means that for the first time I’m able to see her full performance, and man does she perform tonight. I see the crouches and the near jumps and the expressive arms and the reflexive thrashes to the pulses of the songs, and her hair whipping right, left and up and down, spurred on by the gusting wind that comes through us every now and again as if to remind us that we are actually almost outside. And that wind is cold and we’ve made our own individual decisions to remove our bigger tops and play as though we were all warm and toasty inside, although those warm and toasty places very quickly turn hot and sweaty for us. But tonight, it’s wonderful to have that wind and I greatly welcome its chilly bellows.

As you probably know, we always go for it, but there’s something a bit more special in tonight’s air as we feel it blow through us in those welcoming cold blasts as we continue to ignite. It could be that maybe for the first time ever we feel we don’t have to force the issue and instead have a crowd that is really on side and with us right from the beginning. We don’t even have to worry in the slightest when we bring the tempo right down as they continue to hang on to every note. We feel this first with Fire, as real fires flame upwards all around this inside/outside room. Then into Insanity, then right back out the other side as we announce our last song, then finish it the roar that’s been accompanying us all evening. No encore shout, but that’s OK.

Out on the floor and it seems everyone wants to talk to us as we immediately have so many people come and say hello. Before we know it, we’re the centre piece of a group photo with more and more people joining. Out in front the official photographer for the event does her best to fit them all in. Then we hear thanks, thoughts, and even a little analysis as we’re described in the most complimentary terms as punk. We’ve heard that before, but here it goes a little further from Dave, one of the organisers who also performed earlier. He says that it’s not so much that we’re punk music. More, he says that punk was always meant as an attitude. Of being individual, of just going for it, of just totally doing your own thing. ‘I really see that in you guys,’ he says. And there’s more. Much much more. As me and Maja go our separate ways to better work the room, we meet the guys who specially came to see us. Reera (I’m certain I spelt that wrong), Cras, who filmed the video of Rock’n’Roll Tree and Padraig. I believe there were a few more too. Among all this I get a massively enthusiastic review of ourselves saying that we are totally on our way and headed for serious places. ‘I’m not the guy to do that,’ my companion says, ‘But you will meet that person. And soon. I’m telling you.’ Man, it is so nice when the faith is coming from someone other than yourselves.

As we hang around and go deeper into the vibrant evening, there are other chats, and people saying they might be able to hook us up with this or that venue or this or that promoter, and the Daves say we are very much in their minds now for future shows. And we also hear the word on a load of open mics and other contacts in Dublin from a chat I have with Ross who makes it clear he doesn’t claim influence, but says that he will pass us on some details that we really should chase up. And true to his word, he does. Cras sends us the amazingly shot video, Ken says he’ll mention us in his blog, and by Sunday, without any notice, we’re just up on the Instagram site of the Tullamore Arts Society. There’s been so much here tonight that has seems to have suddenly elevated us into a place where things just feel that little bit more real.

And one of those videos from Crass
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIjQ81X8dzs

OK. We’re building on our German experience now. We’ve worked on our level and are finding out that our thing really does have the capacity to hit. It did in Germany a few times as well to be fair. Maybe there will always be gigs that don’t quite work, but even in some of our shows that haven’t made it so big, we still felt there were one or two people who were really into it. And then we have something like tonight, with people following us here, and paying to see us after catching us somewhere else. That’s a whole new thing. And taking tonight after pulling off The Lantern, a venue we were told even seasoned cover musicians saw as a tough crowd. Yeah, I think we have this now

Day 57
Sunday April 24

We’ve noticed the occasional creaking sound at the end of our guitar recordings. I have to stay absolutely still to prevent it from happening. But that’s not so easy during songs when there are quiet, or stop/start sections. Little noises have been creeping in there too. I’ve been trying to minimise this in the studio by making sure I’m not wearing anything with buttons, like a shirt. No belt for trousers, and no buttoned trousers either. But still that noise. We discover it’s the strap moving just ever so slightly around where it’s attached to the guitar. Maja comes up with a genius idea to fix this. Put a cut open sock on the ends of each strap and attach them to the guitar through the socks. Now I can move around all I want in front of the most sensitive microphones and there’s no unwanted noise at all I now also have a guitar sock. Come on. Rock’n’roll.

Day 58
Tuesday April 27

I’m on my own for another week or so with Maja having left yesterday for a ten day visit back to Sweden. Top of my to do list is to basically record as much guitar as I can. I’m fairly confident I’ll at least be able to get all the guitar parts down in this time and maybe even one or two bass parts two. I get to really setting things up today, all ready to just blast it down. To continue with her own things, Maja’s taken her interface with her and I’ve got mine. I get to it and after a little while I discover that – well, let’s not get too technical and boring here – my interface doesn’t record in the same way hers does. Which will probably render anything I record on it unusable if we’re going to go for commercially viable levels of quality and consistency. Which we are. At first this is very frustrating because this was the main thing I was planning on doing with my time alone. But then I realise there is plenty I can still do, even if it’s just prep. I can do pretty damn good levels of practice and preparation with what I have. I’m not going to make predictions or get ahead of myself, but yeah, I’m still good with what I have here, just a different kind of good. I’ll take that.

Day 61
Friday April 29

Studio today and the sock falls off the guitar. This is possibly the first time anyone’s ever said or written that in the history of guitars. And yes. That is the most exciting and diary worthy thing that happens today.

Day 66
Wednesday May 4

Maja’s back today and wants to do absolutely nothing. Fair enough.

Day 67
Thursday May 5

Out to buy drumkit and three shops including Dublin
Do we want to write about this?

Day 72
Tuesday May 10

We’re supposed to be playing in The Trap tomorrow but we’ve been checking and there are no posters up and no mention of us on their website. We decide to cancel as it looks like no-one knows we’re playing. We meet Jimmy there and he tells us they lost the posters. ‘But people know alright,’ he says. Word has got around. But if you could bring more and we’ll get them up, that would be good. OK. We’re back on again, not as if we were ever really off, except maybe in our own minds. However, he asks if we could put our time back to 9:30 from 7:30 as one of Clara’s soccer teams has a big match and everyone will be at that. Cool. Done.

Day 73
Wednesday May 11

And what a gig it turns out to be. Fantastic attendance with a massive anticipation around the place for seeing us. And we meet it head on and in full. Huge reactions to everything and, at the end of it all, three encore shouts, two of which we respond to. I’m fortunate enough to have quite a lot of experience of triple encore calls. And in that experience, the third rarely goes well and you end up wishing you’d stopped at two. So we do, and still leave them wanting more.

This is also the first outing of our brilliant new backdrop which adds a whole new level to our stage appearance.

A few highlights of this one.

First, there are many shout outs for I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). So we play it early on, then of course it gets a massive call for when the encore shouts begin. And yes, we play it again.

Almost everyone here tonight came out just to see us, with one guy leaving work early in Dublin to be able to get here in time, and a few other people coming from 10 miles away and beyond.

The last time we played in here was November 5 last year, which happens to have been our first ever show. Fully six months ago. So it’s incredible for us when someone requests one of the songs we played that night – Bang Bang. Which we actually wrote entirely by accident the night before that show. They don’t call it out by name, instead saying, play that one you did without any music. Yep. That’s Bang Bang alright. Even more remarkable, we don’t even do that one anymore, or at least we haven’t done it for quite a while. So I’m sorry to report that we’re unable to meet this request for one of our own songs.

We have had this quite a bit at other shows, but it’s so cool to be able to say again, that we have people all around trying to sing along to songs they’ve never heard before. We know, because some of those songs we’ve never played in here before.

The total time for this show clocks in at 50 minutes. That’s 50 minutes of people hearing songs they’ve never heard before – apart from I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). But when we announce we’re at our last two songs, a whole bunch of disappointment is directed at us. After which, yes, we get all the encore calls.

And yes, at 50 minutes, this becomes our longest ever show, unless you count what we did at Bei Theresa in Hamburg, but really, that one just felt like a glorified rehearsal.

The hat really is getting some actual respect. We did well at The Lantern back in the middle of April and very much again here tonight. I think for the first time we’re realising we can actually make money doing exactly what we’re doing right now.

Day 77
Sunday May 15

There’s a coverband playing a mid afternoon show in the back garden of The Trap today and we go there for a really cool return as time and again we’re congratulated on our midweek show. We even get introduced to some people as the next Oasis. We’ll take that. After the coverband has finished their set, the stage at the back of the garden is left tantalisingly empty. As the DJ turns the volume up, me and Maja walk up the slightly spiralled ramp which leads to the side of the stage and basically get busy dancing all over it. After a while a few regulars come and join us. A little while after that when we think we’re done and go to walk down the ramp we’re very much told, no. You guys get back up on that stage. And so we do as Maja discovers she’s now very much the centre of attention, a role I think she’s decided she very much relishes in. When we finally do come down, I take off to the bar. When I look back, expecting to see Maja right behind me, I see she’s somewhat disappeared into a crowd of people who have welcomed her off the stage.

Day 78
Monday May 16

The Diary’s going to have a slightly different feel for a little while maybe. After a bit of a flurry of gigging activity, we’re not really trying to do much more right now than record. We don’t think anyone really wants a full blow by blow account of the studio, and it could also get quite confusing as we’re working on all the songs simultaneously; a vocal on this one, then that one, then a drum track on this one, then a bit of mixing and production over here and so on. So what we’re thinking is going track by track in here at the end of recording and maybe talking a bit about the experience of laying each one down. Most of the days we don’t write anything, assume we had our heads down in the studio, or maybe relaxing between studio days, because we really are about to get very busy in there.

Day 82
Friday May 20

Yeah. It’s kind of like this. A long and tough studio day today and we decide to go to The Trap for a quiet drink to take things in and decompress a little. We walk in and, rather than finding a chilled atmosphere we discover a full on band is playing and the place is packed. What have we missed. We quickly retreat to the street. A quick glance at our phones tells us it’s Friday. Damn. We thought it was Wednesday. It’s quite possible one of us even thought it was Tuesday.

Day 89
Friday May 27

We’ve been hitting the studio really hard for a while now and learning a lot. This is taking a lot longer than we thought it would and it’s going to take a lot longer yet. There is so much more to do and learn than we had possibly began to imagine at the start. As such we’ve been discovering that this is what it’s really all about at the moment. Learning how to use the thing – on so many levels – and, in some cases, just learning how to work together in what can at times be a bit of a pressure cooker environment where sometimes there are no right or wrong answers but where everyone has an opinion. We’re also really trying to figure out how we actually sound as a band; all this time we’ve been operating as a one acoustic guitar act, but suddenly we’re throwing bass and drums into the mix along with maybe a couple of other subtle elements. How does this rhythm section interact with us and how do we interact with it? What is this whole thing supposed to sound like? These are questions we’re wrestling with all over the place as we recruit a virtual bassist and drummer and they’re made up of the same people – me and Maja. For bass I’m playing and coming up with the parts, with Maja’s input as well. And it’s the same with the drums. We’re using midi drums for this but with real drum sounds recorded from source. It’s a big beast to tame and something Maja was working on for over a year to try to figure out. So even at what feels like an early stage in our midi drum journey, she’s already been on it a year. It’s only in this past phase of sessions that we’ve been able to work with them in a coherent way. And we’ve been doing that together. It’s been like trying to tame an enormous beast, finally getting it to bend to your command, and then trying to figure out what exactly you actually want to command it to do, while essentially still trying to work out all the details of the game.

With this and everything else it’s fair to say we’ve been getting incrementally fried, and we’re feeling done. For now.

So we’re taking a day or two totally off. Kinda. With that we take a drive to Ferbane, a village about 20 minutes away. We want to go and visit a few different places and maybe have a look at a bar or two. No hustling. Absolutely no hustling. But we may talk to some people, if you can give that another name please.

After walking up and down the peaceful roads of Ferbane we decide to go and have a look at a bar called Henneseys. It’s a decent sized front bar with a large restaurant out back and we’re able to have a quick chat with Fionulla, the manager. We’re not looking for gigs. We are NOT on the hustle. But we introduce ourselves to her anyway and she really likes the sound of what we’re doing and says yes, come back and try to organise something when you want to get onto that.

Ferbane really wasn’t that big, so now we decide to take a drive to Birr and see what that place is all about.

Well, what can we say about Birr? In population terms it’s not even twice the size of Clara and almost a third the size of Tullamore. But damn it has a lot of bars and we get a positive reaction from just about every one of them. By the time we’re done, Birr could well be our new favourite place. Who knew? We walk round the town and at pop our heads into most of the bars. Sometimes we do more than that. In a fair few of them we’re able to have a chat with a manager and one or two regulars.

In one bar we meet a customer called Speedy. He hears our pitch to the manager – we’re kinda on the hustle again, or at least introducing ourselves with intent, whatever you would call that. What can I say? We can’t help ourselves. We bump into him on the street as we’re leaving and he gives us a rundown of the bars of almost the whole town. This gives us a very good list to start with. He says it’s so great to meet people who are doing their own thing and having a go and he’s happy to do his bit to help.

I think it’s also fair to say we’re starting to develop a bit of quiet confidence in what we do. In one bar, the pitch – or whatever it is today because we are definitely not hustling – is going well and the manager says, ‘So you do a bit of everything?’ ‘No,’ I reply absolutely straight. ‘We only do our own thing.’ We get a bit of a nod of acceptance and respect from that as it goes. ‘I guess it wouldn’t hurt to have a go,’ he says. Thankyou very much. We’ll be back.

And on and on it goes with people just being impressed that we’ve come here and we’re having a go at having a go and doing our own thing.

Yep. Birr. We will be back.

Day 90
Saturday May 28

Out for another countryside walk today. We head towards the larger town of Mullingar (pop: 21,000). There are a few lakes dotted about around the outer edges of this town so we quite fancy a gentle countryside stroll. We find one of the larger areas, park the car next to a beautiful good sized lake and head into the woods. However, all is not quite as calm as we were looking for. We’ve landed here bang in the centre of the local music festival and, as we’re walking around trying to enjoy nature and calm our thoughts, the air is vibrating with bass drums and electronic music. I’m quite liking the contrast in ambience but Maja is finding it just upsets what she was hoping would be a tranquil mood. ‘No,’ she says after about 20 minutes. ‘This really isn’t working. I need to get out of here.’ That’s a shame, but understood. So back in the car it is. We’re gonna go check out Mullingar and see if we think we can do any damage here.

Well yes, we do believe we can is the conclusion. Where Birr was a lot of lovely, older style traditional bars, Mullingar is very much of the times and a lot of the places feel like slick city bars. We drop into quite a few but while yesterday we hit the town in mid afternoon and all was quiet and we were able to chat to people, this time we’ve arrived early evening on a Saturday and things are quite a bit livelier. But that’s OK. We’re just on a kind of fact finding, vibe feeling mission. The vibes are good and the facts will speak for themselves when it comes time to try our hands here. For now, yes, we’re also getting a really good feel for Mullingar and have a pretty good idea of what bars we might well have a go at first when we return.

By the time we get back to Clara, the soccer Champions League final is just about to begin. Oh OK. Why not. We pop into The Trap, the decision to head there made easier by their advertisement of a barbecue out back. That will do us just nicely thankyou very much. But more than that. We get out there and discover it’s free. Yep. Free hamburgers and a great seat and table from which to be able to see the big match. A great way to conclude our two days off and two wonderful days of definitely not hustling.

Day 94 – 124
June. Just June

As the month develops we get deep into album territory. This is where we often lose track of time and declare we should take a break for a snack or something, only to discover it’s 10pm, or maybe even later. This includes one day when we decide to do a roast dinner, only to discover it’s past 11pm by the time we emerge. That’s fine. Put the oven on. We’ll do it now. Dinner comes out of the oven around 2am. Yep. This is what it’s like now. While this is the most extreme example of how things are going now, it’s also a pretty good indication of where we are. And each day when we go to bed, that night’s sleep just feels like a necessary interruption before we begin again. Sometimes not much more than a glorified nap with thoughts already deep into the next day. As soon as we wake up we know what to do and we know how we want to do it and we’re almost directly back to the studio. Yes there are days when we get smashed by tiredness or allergies or some such thing and do little more than stay in and around bed all day. But on the whole, as June rocks on and on we roll with it, you could say we’re somewhat starting to find our rhythm.

During the month, Maja has a great idea. What will become known as the ‘Now hustle.’ So far we’ve been booking shows for a week or so in advance, and then turning up on the appointed day with all our gear, to set up and play them. So far so conventional. Maja’s idea changes all this. What if we just turn up at places and offer to play them there and then? And turn up totally prepared. Which means one speaker, which we’ll carry in a backpack, bought specially for that purpose. So we take ourselves off to the biggest sports and outdoor shop in Tullamore and find exactly what she was thinking of. So now we can walk semi conspicuously into a venue with one of us carrying a guitar and the other one wearing a backpack. Who would know? Make the pitch and say we’ll play there and then. No idea how many songs we would do. Maybe 20 minutes worth? Pass the hat, pack up and then onto the next place. We have the backpack, we have the speaker, we have the guitar. And we have just about the right amount of cheek and confidence to go with all that. You know what? It might just work.

Day 125
Friday July 1

We’re up and about and I’m all ready for another day in the studio when Maja suddenly says, ‘I want to gig tonight.’

So, rather than working on the album today, we get busy seeing what a set could look like and working on that. Which means only the smashiest of smash set songs. We’re thinking of a top length of six songs per show, maybe fewer. And hoping to play at least three shows. We’re also going to have Maja on the mic, but myself unplugged. We’re not anticipating massively busy bars so we’re confident this will work. People often play acoustic and unplugged. We’re just giving Maja a bit of an extra mic boost so that she doesn’t have to blow her voice. We rehearse a bit later than intended, and then it’s time to get our gear together and leave. But we’ve never done this before so the organisation also takes a bit longer than intended. We’re not ready to leave until sometime between 6:30 and 7. Meaning we don’t even arrive in Birr until around 7:30. Way too late to make any real impact, we think, but we’ll just get started and see what we can do.

The very first bar we go into, the manager says he doesn’t feel comfortable with the concept of the hat, but he likes that we’re trying to do our own thing. The place is really busy right now so he invites us to call him later in a few days and arrange a show, for which he’ll be happy to pay us. He also says that when we do come back and play, we can sit in the corner and be something like pleasant background music. We thank him very much and leave, with no intention to call. Fair enough to everything he said, but right now for us, this is all about the hat. But also, damn. There’s no way we’re going somewhere to be background music.

We go right into the bar next door where there’s just four people in the place. But we’ve already decided we’re not going to let that put us off. Four people plus a bar staff is four people plus a bar staff to help spread the word. It all counts. The manager in here is up for it, but asks us to come back at 10 when there will be more people in here. OK. That works. First gig in the book tonight. We leave them posters and beer mats. We’re in and we’re on.

Now we head down the high street and into a bar called The Palace where we meet bar manager Nadia. She’s well into it and says we can come back and play at 9. Great.

It’s approaching eight now and we have two gigs in the book. We go nearby to a bar called Molloys where there’s just five or six people spread across the bar. Never mind. We do out pitch. ‘You’re talking about playing now?’ Asks the manager. Yep. ‘Sure, you can do that,’ he says. ‘There’s a bunch of guys out back. If they want to see what you can do, you can play for them.’ Great. We head out back and find a large concrete garden with a bunch of guys in their early 20s sitting around a big round table watching rap videos. They’re all attention as we tell then what we’d like to do and they’re well up for it. One of them goes and turns the TV off and they wait expectantly for us to start. We’re right into it with Six Sense Lover, and yes, they’re with us. We carry on through another three songs, declare we’re done and they want more. All through this, various people from the front bar have been coming out to see what’s going on. We give the boys here their encore, then produce the hat. They almost fall over each other to put into it and we’re not just talking coins either. This is a decent haul from a great start. They also give us the heads up on a few venues we should check out. Brilliant. Thanks a lot guys. We’re on it.

From here we get to The Palace quickly to see Nadia and tell her we’ll be running a little late as we have some places to check out before our show in here at 9. No problem. The first bar we were told to look at is insanely busy. The manager meets us and takes our card, but really, there’s no chance to chat and really hustle here. I leave them to it.

The next place is Kellys nearby. It’s quietish now and the manager, John, is interested but wants to see what we have to offer first. He wants to hear at least one song. ‘Go and rattle away in that corner there and we’ll see how we go,’ he says. We don’t set up the speaker. Instead, I hang back a little with the guitar and Maja stands on the corner of the L shaped bar, right in the middle of the people sitting at it and facing the bar staff. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). What else? We blast through half of it and climax at the end of the second chorus rather than going all the way to the end. This is enough. The place erupts and John says, ‘Very good. I’ll see you guys at 11.’

So that’s it. Having arrived in town a little after 7:30, we now have shows at 9, 10 and 11, and did our first one at 8. And we’ve just shown what we can do in this bar to get that show at 11. That also counts as a performance. But now we’re actually in a rush. It’s already way past nine and we have to do this next show, make it to our 10 O’Clock, then round it all off at 11.

The Palace goes so well that Nadia immediately books us again. For 11am gig for Monday, July 11. That’s eleven of the A and the M. OK.

Now we pack up as quickly as we can and take ourselves to our 10pm where we discover they’d forgotten they already had something on so we were double booked. No problem. We’ll see if we can do Kellys early. We can. It’s 10:30 by the time we get started in there so pretty close to the booked time so all good. The reaction in here is huge with two encore shouts and John, the ever so sceptical at the beginning manager almost dancing his way around the place. And again, the hat does its work, just as it did in Mollys and The Palace. Including the audition, that’s four shows around here tonight with another one booked that didn’t quite make it. And from a standing start at 7:30. Damn. And the hat has done really well for us. This is a thing now.

A big takeaway from tonight is that we have to be better organised with how we organise and carry things. A few times we were asked for cards, or wanted to give beer mats, or just give cards around a bar, and we had to scramble a bit to find them. We also found ourselves rushing to pack up a bit a couple of times, meaning we then had a bit of trouble setting up quickly at the next place. We just need to tighten ourselves up a little bit on all this. It’s all about the percentages in the details. And it’s nights like this that let you know exactly what you need to sharpen up on to pick up those percentages. On the way home as we reflect on tonight, we also conclude that four songs is pretty much optimum, with one more to be added for an encore. We also decide not to hustle any of the bars we play for future gigs. No. Instead, hit a town and move onto the next one. Otherwise we could find ourselves bouncing between towns all the time playing this or that single gig that we booked, when we could be in some new place hustling a whole bunch of gigs on the spot, just like we’ve done tonight.

Now going to try to catch last orders at The Trap. Well, we do, but we’re only just settling in when people start to ask if we could bring the guitar and carry on in here. We resist, but the requests become a clamour. OK. We’re doing this. I bring the guitar back and we do another set, totally unamplified this time with me hanging back and Maja giving it her all out front. And for the fifth time tonight we totally smash it. I think we’ll take that for a result. Just so much bigger, better and way more vast than anything we could have expected when we left the house, especially as late as we did. And yes, we’ve also brought in a lot more money than we could have imagined from doing this. People, we’ve taken totally our own songs, own vibe and our own style. And it’s happening. We are doing this.

Day 126
Saturday July 2

Just decompressing and going over yesterday. First, just an amazing experience and result. And yes, as covered yesterday, we learned a lot, not least in how we could do it with just that bit more more slickness. But we have also seen if this is viable, and yes it is. Now we know for a fact that we can go out, play shows on the spot in the way we want, and make money.

We conclude that if we can just get out there enough and continue doing what we did yesterday, we can totally make a living out of this now. And that is a big, no, huge, moment to have arrived at. But now we have to concentrate on the studio for a little while longer. Yesterday was really about satisfying that curiosity itch as to how much this could actually work. Now we know it can, we get back to work.

Day 132
Friday July 8

We decide to have another go at that instant gig/hat thing. This time we’re going to try Athlone, the second biggest town in Ireland’s midlands region. The biggest is Portlaoise, the third is Mullingar and the fourth is our own Tullamore.

After a couple of places in which the manager isn’t in and so it’s almost a waste of time to hustle, we come to The Brazen Monkey. We were deliberately heading in this direction as we’ve heard in previous visits how this was a new place that would welcome new music, and so it proves to be. And it certainly does all look brand shiny new and all refurbed. However, the manager would like to hear at least something of a song first. We do our half of Naked thing and yep. Come back at 8:30. It’s about seven now. Cool. A bit more hustling to see what else we can shake out, while having one in the book.

What follows is a slightly frustrating time with few managers being around tonight. Then we come to a bar that says yeah, sure. Go for it. Great. We start setting up, then the person who said yes comes back. Turns out that person was a supervisor, and the manager has told them no. Apparently another band has been booked and is about to arrive. I can confidently report (giving all benefit of the doubt while others may not) a band could have been booked but none arrives. We know for an absolute fact that no band arrives.

We’ve got time for one more hustle and we decide to hit a place called Vals. This is a quiet locals type bar but we checked it out a while ago, had quite a positive response and were encouraged to come and try to play should we ever return to the area. Well, here we are. We go and meet Val once more and he says that yes, absolutely. Come back at 10/10:30 and do your thing. Great. Now for The Brazen Monkey.

We arrive and the vast bar is practically empty. Oh. OK. No worries though, says Gary, the manager. There’s a big crowd coming at 9. Hold off and then you can play for them. Oh wow. Cool. We have our speaker with us for Maja’s vocals but Gary’s adamant we won’t need any amplification at all. Just do your thing, he says. But no. We mic the vocals thankyou very much. So we set up and wait.

Nine comes, and so does the promised crowd. A lot, a lot of them. Enough to totally fill the bar. It looks promising until we realise that there’s very little reaction to a live act being on. Not only very little reaction, they don’t even seem that aware that we’re here. Also, up to now we’ve been playing much smaller bars to not so many people and where you could reasonably expect to play totally unplugged. Although Maja does have a mic, which is how we’re set up in here. We get started and people around us are into it, but that doesn’t last too long – two songs at most before we realise we’re doing little more than playing to ourselves – as the people out front keep pounding the jagermeisters. They’ve just got off the boat – literally. One of those Viking type trips and they’re clearly well into their evening. I try to take the show to them and disappear into the thick crowd with the guitar while Maja continues singing from the stage. It’s like this. I can go where I want because I’m not plugged in. Maja has a lead and so can be heard, but can’t go and take on the crowd like I can. I’d like to say it’s a valiant effort on my part to do just that, but really it doesn’t work and I’m basically ignored. I get back to the stage and me and Maja agree we should do one more song and call it. That will make it four songs for this show. About standard, but we were expecting more and, after a promising start, it really didn’t take off. I must say it’s with some reluctance that I start to take the hat round. I’m met with almost incredulity. As though I’m some beggar who just wandered in off the street. Yep. So many people in here, especially those towards the back, didn’t even know anything was going on.
Hey mate

Bottle of wine and Never Dine Alone. Babble On really got us, then Without You had us dancing in the kitchen. Without You is up there with Maja’s favourite songs. Great job mate. From Maja specifically: ‘Keep going and keep strong.’ Not at all to be confused with me not wishing you to keep going and being strong. Remember: The Diaries love you.
We start to feel not so bad about this when the lady in charge of this unwieldy crowd comes up and asks to borrow Maja’s mic. Maja’s reluctant, but the lady assures her it’s just for a few seconds. It clearly isn’t, as she starts to call out a whole itinerary and then starts trying to line up some kind of game. Yep. Pretty big liberty taking. But now we see that the whole place ignores her too. We really were against it. This crowd is up for nothing but seeing how many Jagermeister shots they can do, and now I see that, it all makes sense. This is one of the most mind bending, personality altering drinks there is, and it’s all over the place. And now, as our new and unwelcome microphone friend continues to struggle against the tide, we see just how puerile this group is, as a single, unthinking group entity. All of a sudden, for no apparent reason, people start randomly bursting balloons like this is the most fun game ever. For us, the place has now become something we just need to escape from as we try to talk between us. Another balloon bursts at a painful frequency and volume. Then another, and another and another. A few more and we’re getting visibly angry, almost panicky with the ear splitting regularity of the things. The jager has taken full effect and a large group of actual adults has been turned into a bunch of follow the leader toddlers. The biggest and most fun pleasure in their lives right now being the loud bursting of balloons. Oh, this is just the best game ever. Except it really isn’t. And we’re packing gear away and so can’t even cover our ears. We get everything down as quickly as we possibly can and flee out into the still sunny street without even bothering to acknowledge or say anything to Gary. First, we just had to get out of there. Second, we feel we’ve been totally hung out to dry here, and feel even worse towards him for the insistence that we wouldn’t need any amplification at all. What the hell was he expecting us to do? Well, we’ve done it and we’re done. Off to Vals. Well, the ‘show’ we’ve just done hasn’t been as totally lost as we thought it was as a few guys want to talk to us now outside and say how much they enjoyed it. Wonderful. When they ask where we’re going next and we tell them, they ask what we’re bothering to go there for?

We’re met at Vals by a very sedate crowd. Everyone seated at the small bar. Expected. And a young family seated at the table opposite the bar. Cool. As soon as we begin, the place opens up for us and everyone’s totally into it. Especially the family and their two boys. We power through a fantastically fun and relaxed set with the whole place on our side. We really are helping to make their evening and, after our last experience, they’re making ours as they restore our faith in impromptu audiences. When we finish, Val is first to generously put into the hat. Then everyone else follows. We leave with the best wishes of the bar ringing harmoniously in our ears rather than the attack dog balloons from which we escaped the last place. Guys, that’s why we bothered to go to Vals and why we shouldn’t have bothered with your lot and that last jagermeister soaked disaster.

Day 133
Saturday July 9

We played at a place called Gussies in the nearby village of Ballycumber a few months ago. You might remember. A whole bunch of people came to see us and pay €10 for doing so shortly after. So it’s with some confidence that we return today and book ourselves in again to play tonight. We meet someone who says he’s the manager, he’d love to have us later. Eight O’Clock give or take. Great. That gives us an hour or so to go to Ferbane. We’ve decided to check out Hennesey’s, where we met the lovely Fionulla a little while ago. She’s delighted to see us when we arrive and very quickly books us for 9:30 tonight. Before we leave, she makes sure to get posters from us and to take pictures of us with them for her social media. Two shows almost immediately in. That will do us. Now off to Gussies.

We arrive and there’s someone else apparently in charge now. We go and say hello to the guy behind the bar, but before we do, he says, ‘No. You guys are no good.’ He says it with such brutal finality. Sorry? ‘I remember you. You were in here a few months ago. You were no good. It didn’t work. ‘But we spoke to someone today who said he was the manager and we booked to play here with him.’ ‘No you didn’t.’ Oh, this is fun. Fair enough. Someone was messing about. I know we’re going to get nowhere here, but I can’t let this next thing go unremarked. ‘I get that you didn’t like it,’ I begin, ‘but there were people here last time who came to see our next show. And they paid for it.’ ‘No they didn’t,’ he says. ‘Yes they did,’ I say. ‘No they didn’t,’ he says. ‘Yes they…’ actually I don’t. But he does continue. ‘You were no good.’ We’re stunned. We’re actually laughing at this guy even as we’re being rebuffed in the rudest of terms. It’s the only way to react to his unreasonable absurdity. Although this might just be his gruff friendly/ unfriendly way because in his next breath he says, ‘You might want to try Flynns down the road. They have music.’ OK. Er, thankyou. And we’re gone. We will not be returning to Gussies.

We find Flynns and the manager is hesitant. He puts it to the quiet regulars in here. Do they want us to play? They’re non committal, although one or two do give quiet voices of assent. That’s enough. We set up under a lot of bemused gazes. Then we begin. Under a lot of bemused gazes. The ones that are well mannered enough to not be bemused have their backs to us. So maybe they are bemusedly gazing, just in a different direction. Or maybe doing gazing of an even more negative kind. No way of knowing. We being the only way we think we can under such tough circumstances. With a blast of I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Gets them every time. Even when we only do the half length version, which is exactly what we do now. Nope. Nothing. Or at last not much. OK. Rock’n’Roll Tree. Again, very little. Now we hit them with another of our old faithful encore songs. How You Rock’n’Roll. When even this fails to elicit much more than an approving sigh – yes, they can sigh approvingly here apparently – we look at each other and are like, yep. We’re done. After yesterday’s embarrassment at The Brazen Monkey, I can’t face doing the hat in here. Maja says she’ll do it then. And the first guy she goes up to puts a tenner in. Wow. Did not see that coming. A few other people put in too. Coins, but hey, we’re always grateful no matter what it is. We leave with a haul of around €15. We’ve had better results, but hey, a packed Brazen Monkey yesterday yielded less. It’s with some triumph that we reach the car. We really can’t take that result in after a gig that felt so totally flat. Next.

We meet something of a similar bemusement at Henneseys, but a more familiar kind. A, ‘We’re not sure what to expect, but OK, do your thing,’ kind. It helps relax everyone that Fionnula is so welcoming, and as soon as we begin, people relax even more. Or, more than that. They’re very quickly with us. Two songs in and the experience of Ballycumber is totally washed away and drained behind us. Yes. This is very much more like it. And the hat agrees. We count it as soon as we get to the car and it’s given us the highest result from this type of gig so far.

Day 134
Sunday July 10

We take some time to really talk about and have a good look at last night and consider how we’ve done so far with all these instant hat gigs. The more we talk, the more we realise ,as long as we just do the miles, we really are now a fully, financially viable, independent proposition. With that we declare ourselves professional songwriters and performers. The huge moment just got huger.

It gets even madder when we go out for a pint in Dolans and get asked for our autographs by someone we’ve never met. And this in a pub we’ve never played.

Day 142
Monday July 18

Maja decides today is a Diary holiday. The sun is fully out, our time is ours to do what we want with it, and we’ve been using it very busily lately. So yeah. Makes sense. Also, Maja’s going to Sweden again next week for a visit so we should take these hot sunny days of summer while we can. We’re taking this one. We have a think and a look and decide we’re going to go to the seaside. We settle on a beach in Galway, get packed up and set off.

Although it’s a Monday, there’s still a very healthy attendance at the large beach we discover, but at the same time, plenty of space for us to set ourselves up wherever we want. This will be the classic beach day of reading in the sun and swimming in the sea. And what a great sea it is, full of some of the biggest waves we’ve ever seen, but just small enough to be playful and not dangerous. And play in and among them we most definitely do, along with the rest of a very joyful crowd of swimmers and wave riders. Although, with all these waves comes a tiny little bit of inconvenience in the shape of hundreds and hundreds of jellyfish. They’re spread all over the beach and they come upon us in, well, waves.

We ride the crests up and down, surf/swim, then out again. Then off for some sunbathing/reading. Then back out into the water. It’s a few hours of summer beach perfection until we declare ourselves done and head off for a drive. New destination: The cliffs of Moher.

What to say about this world famous landmark? Just that they’re so high, you can look down and see birds flying high above the sea. We’re over 200 metres above that sea at some points as we walk along the cliff edge. Well, not quite the cliff edge. Are you crazy? No. We’re safely inside the short wall, a comfortable distance away from the actual edge thankyou very much. But close enough to marvel again and again and again as we look along the seemingly endless stretch to more cliffs in the distance and even a small chain of islands. And again, with it being a Monday afternoon, we almost have this 14 kilometre long thing to ourselves as we pass very few tourists. It’s an absolute privilege to be here and we’re aware that we are in the presence of, and standing on top of, one of the true natural wonders of the world. And yep. I’ve just checked out worlds greatest cliffs, and right at the top, standing above all the others in more ways than one, is this very spot we’re standing on right now. It’s not just a walk. So many times we just stop and stare and try to take it all in. But really, that’s an impossible feat. You can never take this all in. You have have to keep trying and keep looking. Until that sad moment comes when you realise you have to go home. It’s either that or stay here forever. And believe me, that may well not be so hard to do. This truly is scenery the like of which neither of us has ever seen. With that, I’m touched with more than a tinge of guilt that I lived in Ireland for nine years way back when and never came here. Well, I’ve put that right now.

And we’re still not done as we get back in the car and head off in search of dinner. Now onto the lovely little town of Lisdoonvarna. We find a large hotel restaurant here and settle down for fish and chips while being entertained by a pretty cool and lively cover duo. But what blows me away here more than anything is that they’re playing for tips. It’s always been a given that original acts do not get paid. They can make money if people pay to see them – no upper ceiling; how big do you want your stadium? But unless you’re famous and are playing Mr millionaire’s birthday party, original acts do not actually get paid. It’s up to them to hustle. And on that, we have the hat. Cover acts on the other hand very much have a ceiling. It can get a little high, but it will never reach the stratosphere – alright, the occasional tribute act. You’ve got me. But you see what I mean. No. Cover acts get paid. Fill the diary, chuck the odd wedding in and you’ve got a nice enough full time earner. You won’t be retiring to the Caribbean in your yacht on it but if you’re able to play the game well enough, you can get by while it’s rocking. And that’s why people play covers. But for a tip jar now? That’s harsh. I’d never seen it until Hamburg, and I’ve been aware for a while that it can be common in some tip heavy cultures. But in Ireland? No. Original bands hustle – or take all the non paying gigs they can get in the hope of reaching the next level – and cover bands get paid. Original bands can strike it rich, but usually don’t, while cover bands can get by, and usually do. But here we now see the first creeping of the metaphorical hat into coverband territory. In Ireland. All of this is to say that I feel much better about the hat now. The first time we did it here we were told it wasn’t very Irish, although to be fair, we did quite well that night. On our first full hustle, the first guy we asked said he was uncomfortable with it. And to be fair, when we were contemplating it after our Berlin and Hamburg experiences, I was uncomfortable with it – still not quite got it in/on my head so to speak – and my one reservation about it being a financial way forward in Ireland was that culturally, it would not be accepted. I still can’t believe it has been totally accepted in the way that it has.

In Germany, once we became aware of the ubiquitous concept of the hat, whenever we saw a band we put in generously because, well, that’s what we were hoping people would do for us. Which could mean putting in two or three times a night because we were bar hopping, checking out venues and bands. Who would all then put a hat in front of us. And it was Germany, so we always carried cash; it’s still essentially a cash society. Now here we are, a lovely dinner in front of us after an amazing day out and we have a live act to enjoy it all to. And they really are very enjoyable. And guess what. Yep. We have no cash. Oh OK, we manage to scrabble a few coins together so that we can make it look like we’re joining in, but really, it’s not much more than appearances and solidarity between fellow hustling musicians. Sorry lads. We tried. And believe us, the intention was there.

Day 148
Sunday July 24

We decide to go to Trap just for a drink or two. As soon as we walk in we’re met with clapping and a small cheer from a section of the bar standing near the door. Now a few of those people come forwards and request a picture with us. Oh. OK. We do that and then continue checking the place out, because there’s clearly something going on out back. We walk through the bar and into the back function room which really is rocking. Just as we’re at the door and about to enter, someone comes out, see us and also requests a picture, giving his phone to a friend to do the, er, honours, I guess. Damn. This really feels like being famous.

The back bar thing is a Status Quo tribute act and they’ve really brought the crowds out tonight. General live music fans and committed fans. And Status Quo inspire a level loyalty in their fanbase that very few other bands enjoy. That loyalty is on full view here and is actually a little inspiring as the committed few work the room and pull other people up to dance. We grab a drink, find a great spot at a table in the middle of the room and get right into it, and yes, a dance or two. In an atmosphere like this, with a band this tight and into it, you really can’t not.

A few rounds in and I head into the front bar for another. Before I reach the actual bar, I’m enthusiastically introduced to a guy called Roy. Roy, I’m told, is a major promoter. He counts Dublin’s 3 Arena as one of his venues. Damn, this is the place that used to be The Point, Ireland’s biggest purpose built music venue with a capacity of 13,000. While I’m standing there, Roy is told all sorts of great things about us. Then he says to me, ‘Could you do a song or two for me in here now, or not now exactly, just some time tonight?’ I’m not entirely sure, but I’m met with something of a chorus of persuasion, so I say I’ll see what I can do. I’m not going to just get the guitar and have me and Maja do something in here without any licence at all. Not to mention the fact that she’ll want to be amplified. So I go and pull Maja out of the back room and tell her what’s just been asked and would she be up for it? Well, yeah, sure. We’ve both had a few drinks, but hey, it’s just a few songs and we know what we’re doing well enough. Let’s do it. Now to see if this can be done. Jimmy’s around and I ask him for a quick chat. I explain to him what’s going on and what we’ve been asked to do. It’s quite loud, even out here in the courtyard type area, and he’s not completely sure what I’m asking. To be fair, neither am I. His initial response is, ‘Not a chance.’ It’s not been planned and besides, there’s another band playing right now. I tell him we had no intention of this, but have an opportunity to play for a major promoter who’s specifically asked us to perform for him here and now. Jimmy ponders for a few seconds and says, ‘Yeah, but what money are you asking for?’ Money? No. Nothing. We don’t ask bars for money at all. We do the hat. But this being a kind of live audition, we might not even do that tonight. He thinks again. Whatever he says next I decide I’m going to have to have to accept because we’ve had enough of a back and forth and the volume is quite difficult to talk through. ‘Oh, OK then,’ he says. Brilliant. We’re on. I go and tell Maja, then I go into the front bar to tell Roy. He’s nowhere to be seen. But no worries, I’m told. He’s around. Just go get your gear and do your thing. OK. One impromptu instant show coming up.

By the time we’ve got back home, returned and set up, the show in the back bar is coming to an end. Word has got round that we’re about to play, and an expectant crowd is starting to form. Great. Except Roy is still not among them. He said he would be around all night and whenever we played would be fine. Well, where is he? I’m told various things. Out back, or maybe even gone to Dolans for a quick one. But we should just start, we’re told. If he doesn’t come, he can be sent a video. But that’s no good. We could have already just have given him a video link if that was the case. He wanted to see us. He asked us. Where is he? All fine, but the increasing crowd is starting to get a bit restless and really wants us to start. We say we’ll wait another ten minutes and if he doesn’t come, well, we’re all set up to play now. People clearly want a show, and so we’ll just play. But just the two or three songs, as that’s all we were planning to do, just so Roy could have a look.

Two or three songs. Yeah, right. But this is in danger of becoming like The Brazen Monkey; I have an unplugged guitar, while Maja has a microphone. I do my thing, walking among the room chugging out a few isolated chords as something of an introduction while Maja gets ready. I can immediately see this is very different to The Brazen Monkey. People are waiting. Their attention is held. They want to see us. Not slam Jager and burst balloons. We start. And it’s on. Instantly. The room is with us all the way. There’s not a single hope we’re getting out of here playing just two or three. Two or three in and it’s clear the room is just warming up. The cheers greeting the ends of our songs are enormous. Some of the reactions enter soccer jubilation territory. This is mad, and we’re just riding it. Me all over the place and Maja doing her thing from the stage. And in and among it all, our friend Cyvina is filming. We’re going to miss the end on the video because we were not expecting anything like this and my battery is not fully charged. But I can report that we get enough.

After song four or five, someone comes up to me to make a request. I tell him we only do our own songs, sorry. ‘These are all your own songs?’ he asks in incredulity. Yep. He takes a big step back and says, ‘Carry on.’ Brilliant. And so we do.

We end up playing around 40 minutes and it’s a full on sweaty affair, with the whole room involved and engaged. And here’s Jimmy, coming in for the party as well, and the two of us just rock it out when me and Maja break out our latest song – The Cat – for it’s first appearance.

When we finish, the call for an encore is absolutely irresistible. We blast into How You Rock’n’Roll. We’ve already played I Like You (Better When You’re Naked), but of course we’re not going to get away with not playing it again. Bar regular Alan is with us right at the front, being a great cheerleader and supporter, and now he turns MC. He announces to the crowd that we’re now going to play what he calls our hit. You all know it, he says. Over to us. It’s into a frenzy that we launch our final song and our second encore. And when it’s all over, Cyvina comes up to us and in some jubilation presents us with our hat. Oh wow. She’s already taken it upon herself to do the hat. And it’s full. People really have gotten into the spirit of it and very generously put in. By far our biggest ever take. And for a show we had absolutely no idea of when we came in here tonight. It’s fair to say it’s up there with the very best we’ve done, and certainly the most vociferously received. Although yes, Laksmi in Berlin still holds its very special place in our memories. But tonight? Oh wow. Just the size of it. The full show-ness of it. The hat result. The expectation. Yes, this was a big one. But Roy is still nowhere to be seen. As far as we’re aware, he missed it all.

And here’s a part of what he missed.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xhjg2Wp0I8&t=29s

Day 149
Monday July 25

The owner of our local music shop in Tullamore recommended a specific guitar for us a while back, one that he was just starting to get in. He has a really good feel for our sound and totally understands what kinds of demands our hard hitting, low tuning and high energy performances place on a guitar. This is a monster of a guitar from Tanglewood and we go in today to have a look at it. He says it can handle low end better than just about anything in the price range, has a larger, stronger body, and can be extra reinforced just for us. It’s a Harry Potter wand moment. As soon as we take it off the wall, it already feels like ours. And I don’t need to play it for more than a few seconds to confirm that fact. It has a sound and feel unlike anything I’ve ever experienced from an acoustic. Just enormous. Huge action – meaning the strings are set high above the fretboard. But that’s fine. The way we play, we really need that extra room for string vibration.

Day 151
Wednesday July 27

Maja leaves for Sweden today. The plan now is that I will have a couple of weeks to really hit the studio, rerecording all the guitar parts with the new guitar. Then the bass down, then onto the drums. Basically to get as much as I can of the backing tracks down. We’ve decided to take advantage of Maja’s Sweden trip for a brief European tour because, get this, she’s driving there from here, then driving all the way back again. So, we decided, why not come back together, hitting a few different countries on the way? And we decided to begin that together bit in Berlin, sometime in the second week of August. Then after Berlin we’ll play it as we go, hitting another country or hopefully two, before returning to Ireland on August 24 through France.

Day 152
Thursday July 28

My studio stuff doesn’t quite work out as planned. The day Maja leaves I get sick. And stay sick for a little over a week. I do manage to get some studio time in when I’ve recovered, but not as much as I was hoping for. During this period we decide to head to Berlin on August 11 by which time I’ve at least managed to get all my guitar parts in.

Day 158
Wednesday August 3

A message comes from Maja to tell me that she’s bought the equipment we need to go wireless, something we’ve been discussing lately. Now she’s gone and actually sorted it out. Just brilliant. Another step forwards in our presentation. We’ll be trying this out for the first time when we play the first show of our next European tour.

Day 161
Saturday August 6

Recovering from being sick and just kind of meandering to take off, while getting back into the studio and really getting those double tracked guitars down. Then my phone pings. It’s a guy saying he works with Roy and that Roy would like to meet us. I Text back and say that Maja’s not in Clara right now and that we’re going on tour soon, but I’m around. Great, comes the message back. If you’d like to meet, Roy’s in Dolans right now and he’d like to talk to you. Oh. Oh. OK. So I take myself off to Dolans, and on the way I get another text telling me exactly where he is in there. Fine. And yep, I do find him. It’s a good job I was told where he was actually, over by the side next to the fireplace. Because the place is packed. Of course it is. It’s Saturday night.
He’s a bit surprised and confused when I go and say hi and that I understand he wanted to see me. I’m now confused that he’s confused, and I show him the text communications I’ve had in the past half hour or so. ‘Oh, that’s just someone in here playing silly beggars,’ he says. I’m confused even more. ‘I do want to talk to you as it happens, but this is someone just trying to insert themselves into the deal.’ The deal? What the hell? Roy continues. ‘Look, I was planning on calling you,’ and he pulls out our card from his top pocket. Right there in his pocket. He immediately tells me to forget whoever was texting me, and I never do find out who it was. But it looks like someone got wind that Roy was interested in working with us and decided to, as he says, insert themselves into the deal as a middleman. What the hell? People are inserting themselves into potential deals involving us now? Apparently. ‘So you did see us?’ I ask. ‘I did. I kept myself at the back, but I saw alright. Then a few days later I saw a bit more on some videos I was sent.’ Oh, again. OK. ‘Look,’ Roy continues, ‘I know Maja’s away…’ He knows? ‘When is she getting back?’ ‘Well, she isn’t,’ I begin. ‘Well, she is, but I’m meeting her before then. In Berlin in a few days, and then we’re going on tour for a few weeks.’ ‘Great. And you’re back when?’ ‘August 23rd. So, last week in August.’ ‘Cool,’ Roy says. ‘When you get back, give me a call and we’ll see about starting to get some gigs arranged. You’d be looking at something in the €500 region. Sound good?’ This is mad, but I don’t blink. ‘Yeah, but you do know we only play originals right?’ ‘I do.’ ‘Great then. I’ll let you get back to it and I’ll be in touch.’ ‘Do that.’ We shake hands and I’m out of there, his number on a piece of paper he’s just written on for me. I go across the road to The Trap, get a beer, go in the back garden and get in touch with Maja.

‘You’ll never guess what’s just happened.’

As we discuss this, now and in the next few days, we decide this is even bigger than getting the fabled record deal. We talk about that thing when bands have this or that label interested in them, or maybe when a new band gets signed and it’s all go for them, but a record deal could still go all kinds of ways south. This is much more than that as far as we’re concerned. This is what looks like a major promoter looking to get involved and to throw us straight in. Record deals. For a start, what does that even mean today? No, this is getting in with someone offering gigs, very well paying ones right from the off, and with a line to The 3 Arena. The Point. Ireland’s biggest music venue. We have no idea what to imagine. Support gigs with major artists? Probably some smaller gigs to start at smaller venues to see how we get on. Surely not straight to the arena. I’m guessing we’d have to really earn our stripes first. But he’s talking real money straight from the off. What kind of gigs would they be? Not basic pub gigs, that’s for sure. Not at €500 for a new original band. And what kind of new original band gets €500 a gig? What kind of gig even pays that for an original act? But even forgetting the money, with no idea how regular those kinds of gigs would be, this really does look like a potential line to really getting this thing started. We conclude that our job now is to sharpen ourselves up with a solid series of gigs in Europe, then get back and make the call.

Could this really be it? Or whatever that ‘it’ thing is?

A songwriter’s thoughts on Ed Sheeran’s Shape Of You court case win. April 2022

Day 39

Wednesday April 6, 2022

Mark:

Huge relief today as a result comes in we’ve been eagerly awaiting and dreading at the same time. Ed Sheeran wins his courtcase which he’s been fighting alongside his songwriting partners Steve Mac and Johnny McDaid.

If this means nothing to you, just let me say first, that this is huge, just huge for us. There have been a lot of concerning plagiarism cases recently, or at least it’s felt as though it’s proliferated recently and in a way, I actually kind of get it. Bear with me. I’ll come to that. But while there may be some genuine grievances in plagiarism cases, so many of the ones flying about around the current time are purely spurious and nothing more than shakedowns. People with no chance of doing anything for themselves trying to legally steal from those who’ve actually gone out and made it. It basically boils down to, I once used words, that songwriter is using words and made them into a big money making hit. Therefore he or she owes me money. I’m not even exaggerating that much. The Ed Sheeran case felt like a bit of a landmark moment. If he won, maybe this could set something of a precedent and signal the end of these kinds of pathetic, money grabbing, empty spurious claims. But if he lost. Oh man. If he lost. We really don’t want to think about it. It could have been the end of songwriting as we know it. As Ed said himself summing up the experience afterwards, 60’000 songs go up on one particular streaming service every day. I had to go back and check that. Yes. Every day. Which makes 22 million a year. And that’s just on one service. And all of these songs use the same 12 notes. If you’re reading all this Diary because you love your music but have no idea about how to go about making it or how it’s made, yes, there are just 12 notes available to us. That’s if you don’t count the notes in between that we generally don’t have but which are used in some eastern forms of music and I’m not counting them. Those 12 notes. A, Bb, B, C, C#, D, Eb, E, F, F#, G and G#. Yep. Taking away the eastern stuff which can sound a bit strange to us, going back centuries, or even millenia, every song, music score, piece of classical music and every single song on every single Beatles album, uses just these 12 notes and nothing more. Because there is nothing more. Again, as Ed said, coincidences are bound to happen. And yes, there is some imitation, homage and reference. But downright copying? Not as often as you might think. I mean, consider it. Really consider it. I write a song about my wonderful, magic football which I love very much. Try, if you can, to imagine the wonderfully unique melody that only I could possibly have come up with. ‘Maybe you’re gonna be the one that plays me/ Don’t call Saul/ You’re my wonderball.’ Now seriously, do you really think I’d be calling my friends to come round and hear my amazing new song and think they wouldn’t pick up on it? No. Outright copying, for the very most part, just does not happen. Songwriters are creators who want to create. Not copy something else and pretend it’s theirs. Alright, there are some bad actors out there, but for the most part, the people doing the bad acting are the ones accusing others of doing it and then trying to nick all their money.’/ You’re my wonderball.’ Now seriously, do you really think I’d be calling my friends to come round and hear my amazing new song and think they wouldn’t pick up on it? No. Outright copying, for the very most part, just does not happen. Songwriters are creators who want to create. Not copy something else and pretend it’s theirs. Alright, there are some bad actors out there, but for the most part, the people doing the bad acting are the ones accusing others of doing it and then trying to nick all their money.

Now we come to this. If Ed had lost, there’s no two ways about it. It would have been open season on songwriters and as close as dammit to finishing up our chances before we even got out of the gatefold. Anyone who ever had a hit ever, from this day on, would have had it stolen from them the second it got the tills ringing. Basically, the industry into which myself and Maja have set sail and are attempting to steam dead ahead into would have been all but destroyed. I don’t think it would have stopped us doing what we’re doing but I think we would have been living in state of denial that it was even a thing anymore to actually have a go at making something in there without having it stolen from you the second it actually became something. Believe me. The long long wait of a week or so from the conclusion of ‘evidence’ in this case to the actual judgement coming down was agonising. 

I did say that I did get it didn’t I? Well this is that bit. We’ve said before that it’s never been easy to make it in music at any level and in any discipline. But to try to get anywhere now as an original act, I don’t think it’s ever been harder. So for those trying but never getting anywhere and not seeing how they can get anywhere. What can they do to shorten their odds of at least getting something out of this game? Try to take it from those who have it. Yeah, record companies have been doing that to artists forever, but now artists are doing it to each other. And so often, it’s done in the hope that the person being pursued just decides it’s not worth the hassle of defending and just settles out of court so that they can get on with their current album writing/recording, touring, or whatever else it is they’d rather be doing. In a lot of these cases it’s really nothing less than a good old fashioned shakedown, and I can’t help but think a lot of the ‘artists’ are put up to it by the music industry’s own take on ambulance chasing lawyers. No win, no fee. Hello. I’m calling about some chords you recently used. Is that right. Did you recently use chords? Er, yes. Great. I’ve just heard that someone else did. For no money up front, and just a split of the robbery, er, rights, I’ll get them to admit they used the same chords as you and give us the royalties. Great. Thanks. One further question. When you did these chords, did you also use words? Er, yeah. Wonderful. Open and shut case. We file tomorrow, and by the day after that, every songwriter in the world will wish they never bothered writing any songs in the first place. Because, well, if anyone with a pen and a musical instrument can ‘prove’ they didn’t actually write them without copying and can now take all their money, what’s the point anymore?

And that, my friends, is what Ed Sheeran, Steve Mac and Johnny McDaid have just saved us all from.

The Second European Tour Diary, days one to twelve

Day one
Thursday August 11

The second European tour starts today for me at sometime just before 5am as I’m up and then out to catch the first train from Clara to Dublin. 5:35am. First it’s a Dublin flight to Hamburg. There’s no taking in of the familiar Hamburg sights as it’s bus from the airport to the bus station. And from there a bus to Berlin where Maja will be waiting, having arrived sometime late afternoon. While the last tour eventually only took in Berlin and Hamburg, after we had to retreat, first due to Covid, then the war in the east, this time we really do think we’ll get to at least a few countries. However, in that last one, we at least managed to also stay in two places in Sweden before playing a show aboard a ferry between France and Ireland. So technically still a European tour, right?

This time round we’ve decided to give camping a go as it could be a cheaper alternative to hostels and hotels, and may well be a fun addition to the experience. Here I should probably mention the conclusion of our last stay here. We’d been hoping to have some sort of accommodation sorted out with Lenny, the manager of Fargo who said he’d be happy to look after us should we ever return to Berlin. Well, here we are, but the timing just hasn’t worked out. When we got in touch with him to say we would be on our way in a week or so, he came back to say that he was away this week and beyond, so we had to make our own arrangements. And here we are.

I land in Charlottenburg, Berlin at 5:30pm, having left the house almost exactly 12 hours earlier. Now to go and find, not just Maja, but also her friend Adrian who is travelling around Europe and has planned it so that he’s able to connect with us in Berlin. They’re at a camp site somewhere in the outer west district of the city, not too far from where I am now. I won’t pretend it’s easy to find the place. It really isn’t, and I’m not helped by the glorious clear blue sky and bright sun, which would normally be wonderful and welcome, but which mean today that I’m often totally unable to see my phone screen, and so am often not able to read my map screen. Which means I have a really healthy and bracing walk in the wrong direction so many times. When I finally get within hearing distance of them – literally – I discover I’ve come to a river with the nearest crossing about three or four hundred metres away, which means three or four hundred metres all the way back on the other side. Then I still have to negotiate a complicated industrial type complex, all the while somehow trying to communicate to Maja exactly where I am so that she can come and meet me. We finally make it, and this weary traveller wanders into camp. Seriously, if I’d discovered one more wrong turn I would have been thinking, screw the correct entrance, and I would have been starting to climb fences.

After Maja, it’s an emotional reunion with Adrian, whose Malmo apartment we stayed in during the hiatus of our first European tour back in December, when returning Covid restrictions all over Europe forced us to retreat to Sweden.

Oh wow, this is the welcome beers of all welcome beers as Maja has led me to the wonderful outdoor bar of the campsite, which also, very mercifully, does food. All my road dust is shaken off and the three of us now totally relax and catch up by the river which was so clearly mocking me in that last exhausted leg of my journey. As the bar closes, we finish up and Adrian leaves us for his hotel. We will be seeing him again tomorrow. In the meantime, we’re off to our first night of camping. Let’s see how this goes.

Day two
Friday August 12

First thing in the morning, Maja books us into a hostel. Nope. Not staying here. No how, no way. For a start, we’ve discovered there are just so many hidden charges. It’s advertised as a really good, cheap alternative and the prices do look very attractive. Until you get here and reality kicks in. Even a charge for parking. It’s a campsite. Way outside the main city. With caravans and large tents. Of course you’re driving. The charges mount up so much that by the time they’re all added up, you can get a lovely warm bed in at least a hostel, with probably a bathroom and toilet across the hall, hell, in your room if you’re lucky. And there won’t be sand all over the place. Oh yes. The sand. When you think of camping, you think of being in a wonderful field or meadow. Here, they’ve just plonked us in what looks more like a carpark. Oh damn, I can’t imagine what it would be like if it was raining and all that sand and dirt around us just turned to mud. No. Just no. And, kind of by definition, it’s really far away from anywhere we can play gigs in. Driving to the city everyday with all our gear then just having it with us until it was time to drive back here? No thankyou very much. The idea of making it camping was all good and noble, and may well be somewhere else in the future. But here? Absolutely no way. Maja gets on it and finds Isas Hostel on the corner of Templehofer field, just south of the main city.

We’re shown to a no frills but perfectly large and comfortable six bed-room. Three bunk beds. And the luxury of our own fridge, or at least a fridge to share with potential room mates as we’re the only ones here right now. The hostel we’ve found is as cheap and cheerful a place as you could imagine. Cheap at the price and totally cheap looking, but also totally good enough for our kind of stay with better showers than we’ve encountered at some much more expensive places; a shower can be a dealbreaker for me, so I’ll always take a good shower over nice furniture and pretty carpets thankyou very much. We have zero complaints and the staff are wonderfully friendly and helpful. A special shoutout to the cleaner, Fatma. It’s in a really cool and busy district, so everything you could want for easy shopping and eating, and very well connected for public transport. And all for about the same price as that ridiculously overpriced and horrendous campsite we’ve just left.

I’ll let you know now. We’re here for six days and, with just a few overnight companions – all of whom prove to be lovely, some of whom we don’t even see awake – we mostly feel like we have the place to ourselves. Which, as things work out, is just as well.

Out in the evening to meet up with Adrian who’s going to accompany us on our hustle tonight. Oh, Berlin, Berlin. Here we come.

We know exactly where we’re going. We’re heading directly and deeply into Neukolln. This is an area we’d earmarked as a happy hunting ground before our first visit here and so it proved to be. Almost. Back then, in late December 2020, Covid restrictions were beginning again, but we were also discovering that Berlin practically closed in the runup to Christmas. So we pitched to a lot of managers who loved what we were offering, but said the time wasn’t, but please come back if and when you’re in town again. That’s exactly what we’re doing now, but it’s one of those nights when there are no managers around and all our pitches continually fall on unable ears. Yeah. They all just fall. Instead of the friendly, semi familiar faces we were expecting to be greeted with, all we can find are young, left in charge bar staff who have never seen us before and, in any case, can’t authorise what we’re here to do. I can sense Adrian’s frustration, and perhaps, embarrassment for us when, after another knockback, he asks what our strike rate is. I keep my mood upbeat as I tell him it can be one in four, or one in five. But really, if the boss isn’t in when you show up, and no-one there feels they can make a decision like this, there’s nothing you can do, no matter how good your act or your pitch for it. Very occasionally, a supervisor may take it upon themselves to say yes, but once someone says the boss isn’t here so theyI don’t know, there’s absolutely nothing you can do to make it happen there and then.

We’re Six bars in now and we also spent quite a bit of time walking to this area. We’re carrying a speaker, the guitar and our bag of accessories. It’s not a huge amount, but try a long walk with this lot and after a while you really do start to feel it. We’ve been walking for a while. We decide now that for any future hustles, we’re going to identify the target area and just get public transport there. Walking to an area with our gear is just wasted energy. We actually carried more stuff on our gigs last time, but we weren’t doing the now hustle then. Instead, we walked round unhindered to hustle gigs for some later date, then when we returned to a venue who’d taken us, all our stuff was on trollies, so the walking wasn’t as hard as it’s proving now.

Once more, Adrian waits outside while we enter a bar called Palermo. There’s a whole bunch of people sitting outside, and two or three people inside what is a single square space of a bar. Perfect for gigging. I ask the guy polishing glasses if he’s the manager. He is. I give my pitch, and he says, ‘Of course.’ That’s how it goes. When it’s hard, it’s hard. Then you come across a person like this, it suddenly becomes the easiest job in the world and you wonder what all the fuss was about. I run outside and tell a clearly relieved Adrian, ‘We’re in.’ I think, more than anything, he’s relieved for us, that we’ve finally been able to show him that we can come through. That this thing can be done. Now to actually do it.

This will be our first ever wireless gig and we set the speaker up by the large, fully open window, meaning it will also be heard out on the street. There’s some gentle expectation as we count off our first song, and we’re off. The tour is on. First date, Bar Palermo, Nansenstraße 31. Time, 9pm.

As soon as we start, the people are with us and Tomas, the manager, is looking upon us very approvingly as he rocks along. Now Maja does something she’s never done before. She goes outside and starts working the tables on the street. As she does so, I stay inside and dominate the bar, playing from the very centre of the floor to the very few people who are in here and who are really getting into it now. A little while on and we swap places with Maja coming inside as I go outside and start to rock the songs up and down the little strip of street of tables. Then we’re both outside, but again, in different places as Maja plays for that table, I play for this one, then we come together in the middle, then we’re up and down together, then separating again to spread ourselves all over. One in, one out, and change it round again. It’s a total, in the round, fully interactive show. The people love it and Adrian is just mesmerised, delighted at what we’ve become right before his eyes. The performance is one thing, but we can see that the songs themselves are really hitting too. And afterwards, after we’ve also satisfied the punters with the demanded encore, the hat does its thing and agrees that we have in fact been loved in here tonight. After such a faltering start, it is a totally triumphant return to Berlin, but witnessed by just a handful of people. But that’s what now hustling bar gigs is all about. Just a few people at a time, a few times a night. And add up those numbers.

However, it’s already been a trek to get here, we’re all a bit tired, Adrian’s been dragged round long enough. He’s seen how it’s done now, seen us in in action, the action has been fantastically successful and we agree we should take this as a result. We call it a day for hustling. It just so happens we’ve walked pretty much all the way through Neukolln and now find ourselves not too far away from Fargo. Perfect. Where else would we want to go right now?

Day three
Saturday August 13

We’re really slow to be up and in any kind of ready today. But as we do, Maja declares she’s still really run down and tired and just not up for hustling. That’s absolutely fine and totally understandable. We just meet up with Adrian when we’re ready to go out later on, and it’s just a wonderful Berlin hang.

Day four
Sunday August 14

Maja’s really tired again, so once again we call off the hustle. But Sunday Slip at one of our favourite Berlin venues, Zum Krokodil, is on tonight so we can at least manage that. This is a really cool little twist on the open mic format. Hosts Wynton and Liliana give it much more of an event feel with Liliana performing her wonderful stand-up and Wynton doing his freeform jazz/looper thing. Both remember us from last time and we’re enthusiastically welcomed when we arrive.

Their thing is all presented as a kind of ad hoc cabaret show, complete with theme music for the two halves, and just really slick stage organisation and full introductions to each act. Most of which are stand-up comedy performers. Musicians, poets, and anyone else with something to show off on a stage are also welcome so we fit right in here. And we have a little twist on our own act tonight. We’ve finally decided the time has come to do our random show, which is to write our songs down on a piece of paper and put them in a glass for audience members to pick out to decide which songs we’re going to play. Well, we say audience members, but we end up presenting the glass to Wynton everytime, but that’s all fine. It still turns out to be as random as it could possibly be. The first song picked out is Freefall, something I don’t think we would ever have thought of to introduce ourselves to an open mic as it start so gently, but really, why not? And isn’t this the point of the random glass? It really does force us into situations we wouldn’t have chosen ourselves, and also makes us see how the songs can perform in circumstances we wouldn’t necessarily think of for them. We’re wireless now, and we begin our performance taking full advantage of that fact. To the side of the stage is a corridor running up the side of the venue. So you can go down that and emerge at the back of the audience. I do that now and we start with Maja on stage on her own and me behind everyone. I hit the first chord and Maja begins to sing. The audience is transfixed immediately, but also confused, as people start to look around, and then seem to conclude that she’s singing to a backing track. But as the song develops, I make my way through the tables and see the surprised expressions on people’s faces of, ‘Oh, this is what’s going on.’ I time it so that I climb up onto the stage right as the chorus kicks in, and this gets our first vocal reaction of the night from the audience. We’re on. After Freefall, Wynton pulls out Nobody Said. This is a particular surprise to us because we haven’t played it for ages, and damn it’s a heavy song. Then we’re stunned when he picks out our actual heaviest song to follow it up with: My Game, My Rules. This is a big ask, but it means we perform a three song set going from our lightest to our heaviest side. And if last night rocked, tonight smashes. Adrian now sees what we can do to a crowd that is actually already up for and expecting original music, as well as what we can do when we have a full venue and a big stage to have a run at. He’s left reeling at the experience, and if the other night gave him a taster of what we’re all about, after tonight, he totally, fully gets it.

Here’s the full thing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ooka97gxLTA&t=2s

Day five
Monday August 15

Last night was great, but it’s beginning to look like Berlin really isn’t going to happen for us this time. Maja is just totally run down and probably sick. We’re barely even leaving our room at this stage.

Day six
Tuesday August 16

We resign ourselves to the fact that nothing musical is happening for us today either. But with this now being our last two days in Berlin, there is one little thing we can and must do, and that is to go and have a look at Templehofer Field. We can’t not go and have a look at Templehofer Field. This is a huge airfield which is now a public park, bigger in area than Hampstead Heath. But unlike Hampstead Heath, one of my favourite places in London, you can take this field in all in one go. It’s just one enormous, flat space and also a major piece of history. For a start, this was the airfield used during the Berlin blockade during 1948/49 when a plane landed every 90 seconds bringing supplies for a Berlin essentially under siege. Having been closed as an airport and then, in 2010 opened as a public space, it is now the largest inner city open space in the world. And oh, it looks like it. An enormous expanse unlike any I’ve ever seen, and it feels surreal to walk through it on an actual runway. In what is actually an open air museum complete with the kinds of historical story boards found in museums. We spend an hour or so in the wonderful sun having a gentle wander around the place. Then, happy that we have now managed to see this attraction right on our doorstep, we head back to the hostel.

Day seven
Wednesday August 17

Maja’s feeling much better today and, for the first time feels like going out and doing stuff. This will be our last day in Berlin as we plan to leave for The Hague tomorrow, then possibly Anwerp after that.

There’s going to be no hustle tonight though. Today’s the day of the open mic at Laksmi and this has been top of our return list since arriving. Our experience there during our last Berlin visit remains one of our favourite ever performances and nights. The place went mad for us that night and then, as the event ended, the evening just went on and on and we felt pretty much the centre of it. So yes, we have particularly high hopes for tonight. But before we take that on, we want to have at least one real look at Berlin in the summer, having experienced it a bit in the winter. We’re going to make a return to the Brandenburg Gate and Checkpoint Charlie. A very different feeling walking up to and through these places in the summer, wearing T-shirts rather than full on winter clothing. But we did well in December and never really felt uncomfortable walking around. It is really hot today and Maja says it possibly felt better in the winter. That’s the Swedish northern-ness in her. I’ll take summer anytime. But yes, like everywhere really, there is a very real contrast. The most expressive change, I guess, is that this time the outdoor bars are open, including an artificial beach type bar near Checkpoint Charlie. A large courtyard type place surrounded by bars and foodstalls. Of course we go in and take a beer or two in the sun.

After a lovely summer daytrip, we return to the hostel for a little bit of a rehearsal, then take ourselves out to Laksmi. We’ve really been excited about our return here as it generated in us a kind of instant nostalgia. So it’s very special to walk back here again, to the so called Red Bar. The last time we were here, we were told by host Moves Johnson, that it was the best bar in Berlin. It may well actually be. It manages to be both intimate and large at the same time, with a mid sized bar area at the front, supplemented by something of an offshoot area to the left as you walk in. There’s a raised seating area down the opposite wall to the bar, then at the back, the place extends to a whole other area of seating, almost separate from the venue, but still with sight and sound access. And for open mics, while Zum Krokodil has the large stage and great sound, this place has wonderful intimacy. Both places have audiences eager to hear something new, but Laksmi just takes it for atmosphere as far as we’re concerned, probably because of its smaller size which makes an audience feel that much bigger. It’s also totally unplugged, which could be a handicap, but like Krokodil, the people in here really do and the sound effortlessly carries all the way to the back, which is where we end up sitting because the place is already packed by the time we arrive.

As soon as we do, we see Moves. We have a wonderfully high energy catchup. We’ve been chatting with him online a little while we’ve been here, and we’ve been seeing his little flyers all over town. We even sent him a picture of us standing in front of one on our first night here. He’s only too happy to enthusiastically introduce to the host David, and offer his solid endorsement. David’s very interested to meet us as he’s already heard of and is aware of us. Moves says he still talks about us since our first show here, and it seems other people around know of The Diaries. Going forwards a little bit, there is certainly some air of anticipation when the time comes for us to be called to the stage. As for what happens when we get there, we’ll jump around a touch more here. Our plan was to ask Moves if he wanted to hear I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) again, or if he would like to hear more songs. Within a few minutes of chatting, he totally pre-empts us with, ‘I really hope you guys play I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Whenever I tell people about you, I talk about that song.’ This is how we find out we’re still being talked about in this significant corner of Europe, and how we settle the question about whether we should play it tonight or not.

We would like to stay at the front and hang out with the guys, but there really is no room, so we head to the back area and find the last two seats together out there. We’re settled and ready for the show.

We get called up five or six acts in. This venue really, is where we first developed our act of just playing in and around an audience rather than on a stage. It was the unplugged nature of it that led us to the thought of just moving around and playing everywhere. Also, with Maja not confident of singing too loudly at the time, this moving around allowed the guitar to be further away from her and so she was able to be heard without having to sing too loud. Since then, and now especially with our new wireless gear, we’ve really developed into this as being a thing and a whole way of performing as far as we’re concerned. Now we totally break it out here, with Maja going up to the stage and me hanging a little back so that I’m more in the centre of the crowd, in the walkway between the bar and the raised seating area.

Maja’s standing, imperious, looking over the heads of everyone. And I’m down on the floor and the air is silent. It feels like there are only the two of us as I look up and say, ‘Are you ready?’ ‘Yes.’ I count it in and we’re off. And the atmosphere in the bar lifts, and keeps lifting as the song builds, and falls, and builds again. Along the way, people look as though they’re on a rollercoaster ride as they at times seem to be almost pushed backwards and then forwards and then side to side as they propel themselves along to our own pulsating energy. And it’s hot in here. Seriously hot. We’ve been sweating just watching the thing. Now sweat is almost flying off of us, adding to the steaming drama of the moment with Maja leaving the stage and stamping her authority all over the place. The whole time I’m powering along behind her, all animal, soaking wet energy. All the way to the climax and the place goes totally wild as we finish. Before they’ve even quietened down, we’re on it again with the percussive intro to Six Sense Lover. Oh, they’re with us now, as if they ever weren’t. This is our room, this is our crowd. When we hit the thunderous final act of the song, the whole place looks like they’ve just been tipped over the edge of the top of the rollercoaster and we see them, all but waving their hands in the air as it powers down, G force increasing all the way. And we’re in the middle of it, making it all happen. Scream for me. Scream. Screaeaeam. Final, explosive hits on the guitar to conclude our final show for this visit to Berlin.

And yes, they most definitely do.

After that, well, it feels like we’re the only people in the room. We receive the congratulations of the bar staff as we’re awarded our free beers for performing, and we take them outside. Because, after a performance like that, in this heat, an ice cold beer outside is simply the only thing that will do.

When we return, just like last time, we feel like the centre of attention for the rest of the night. That night goes on for quite a long time. By the time it’s all over and we’ve said our goodbyes, being demanded, and promising to return, we don’t get back to our hostel until sometime approaching 4am. And we’re up kind of earlyish in the morning. First, we’ve got to make the check-out time of 11, then we’re off for a seven or eight hour drive for European tour leg two. We’re off The Hague in Holland.

Day seven
Thursday August 18

For the next two nights as we tackle The Hague, we’re staying with a friend to whom I’ll give Diary privacy. The approach to this coastal city is spectacular as you drive straight at the tall buildings, speed quickly through them without breaking stride, then down in a tunnel and on your way to your destination. Brilliantly effective, a fantastic virtual welcome, and as different as it could possibly be from driving through gridlock in London. Which is why that city has the M25 and the North and South Circulars. Don’t ever try to drive through central London on your way to somewhere else.

When we talk about our plans of the now hustle and the hat, we’re immediately told one thing. Forget it. It won’t happen here. No-one can get gigs here just like that, and even if they do, no-one will even consider putting into the hat. It’s basically a full on attempt to talk us out of it. Well meaning, and very much what we heard – quite aggressively at times – when we first spoke about trying this in Ireland. Politely – kinda – I shut it down. Thankyou, but we’re doing this – this may come out a little sterner and full-stoppy than I intend. We’ll get gigs or we won’t. People will put in or they won’t. Simple. With that the conversation ends.

Day eight
Friday August 19

Maybe also get a bit more feel of the city in after watching this as a reminder
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4CZtSILLuE

Shall we go straight to it? Shall we? After all the warnings and doom, and no-one I know could do anything like this, so don’t even try?

Oh alright, we will.

Our easiest and most successful ever hustle, and the most the hat has pulled in in a day. And we called that day at 8pm after having played four times. Yep. We’d played four times, money each time, by 8pm. Two bars asked and three bars played. We’ll get to that. As for the fourth one, we’ll get to that too. By nine we were back with our friend in a bar and yeah, we were quite vocal about what we’d done. In all fairness, he held his hands up and admitted he was wrong. In another all fairness, I’ll venture to say that he wasn’t actually wrong. It couldn’t be done. By anyone he knew. But we could do it. Either that or his friends hadn’t tried hard enough.

By four in the afternoon we think it’s time to get out and get this thing started. Into the city, it’s a wonderfully sunny day and we’re walking through the spectacular main plaza. Maja sees a couple of girls coming towards us pushing a trolley full of boxes of beer bottles. She’s on it as soon as our paths intersect. ‘Hi girls, where are you going?’ They could have been taking this lot to a bar, but no, they’re off to a party which they’re clearly taking responsibility for. Maja gives them cards, introduces us, saying we’ve just arrived here from Berlin on our European tours, and offers to come with them saying says we could play for them and their guests. I hang back and leave the three of them to be girls talking among girls. It’s a fun watch. Who knows where an afternoon and evening like this could lead? If they say yes. For the girls, and for us, this is a bit of a sliding door moment. They do seem to give it some consideration. They talk to each other, saying what, we have no idea, and they’re clearly taken by Maja. They’re intrigued and part of them seems to want to say yes, but probably, understandably, they don’t want to take responsibility for bringing strangers into the midst of their friends, who are then going to play who knows what, and it doesn’t quite work. No. They are not ready to make that kind of commitment for two people they just met on the street. It’s with some considerable good nature that they say thankyou, but no. Maja’s done her best and decides it’s best not to push. Lovely to meet you girls. Have a great party and we may see you around.

After this fun and very close encounter, we set ourselves up with an early evening dinner at a cheap and cheerful enough Chinese restaurant. Nothing fancy at all, felt more like a cafe. We leave and find ourselves back on the street quite full and thinking it could be a good idea to walk around just a little, and not try to play straight away. So we’re not hustling right now. Not quite yet. We are definitely not hustling. We start to make our way down the street, but we’re spotted immediately by people sitting outside a bar directly opposite the restaurant/cafe we’ve just emerged from. They see our guitar and beckon us, playing air guitar to indicate their interest. Come, come. Oh, OK then. We go and they enthusiastically gesture that we should go inside. The windows here are wide open, so they will hear anything that happens in there. We go inside. It’s quite busy, but the place just starts to open up before us and a clear path opens up between us and the bar. You play, you play. Variations on this are being heard all around as smiling faces and expressive hands indicate us to the bar manager right at the back, who as yet still seems oblivious to what is happening. By the time we reach him he’s turned to face us and the clamour from his bar that we play. Poor guy. He doesn’t stand a chance. The decision has very much been made for him. As for me, I barely begin my pitch when he puffs out his cheeks in friendliness and says, ‘Of course.’ What else? He indicates us to a spot by the wall, but very central and says, ‘Please.’ Brilliant. First bar, first show. We definitely did not hustle. But we do now as we go round the bar giving cards and beermats and generally introducing ourselves.

And yes, they really go for it. All originals, all in English, and we’ve got the people in here bouncing, stamping their feet, clapping along, at times trying to sing. Then when it’s all over after five songs, the hat puts in a solid shift, and we get pulled this way and that to pose in photographs. And the manager comes over to smile, say well done, put some money in the hat, and then give us some advice that we really should also try to add a few covers so that, you know, people can hear a song or two that they know. We smile and say thanks for the advice. Has he not just seen what we’ve done without covers thankyou very much? Well, he put in, so he does have some idea. I think in some corners of thinking, even when we appear to have entered those very corners of thinking, this thing we do still doesn’t quite compute. But you have to do covers. No-one walks into a bar they’ve never been to – and in a new country at that – and belts out a bunch of their own songs and makes money. No-one. Maybe he’s right. Maybe they don’t. But we do. It all happened so quickly we didn’t even get the name of the place. We do now. De Waag.

It’s 6pm and we’re already down one very near missed party and one show. By 6:30, we’re starting another show in Caseys, a large Irish bar. If you don’t count the girls, this is two gigs in two hustles, and really that last one doesn’t even count as a hustle. It’s more us that were hustled there. We’ve actually come here at the recommendation of those girls and the place really does stand out. Once inside, we spoke to the bar supervisor, who told us that Joseph, who organised the music, was around and available. Joseph came, and as soon as we did our pitch, said, ‘Set up wherever you want and go for it.’ This place is much longer than it is wide, so we set up our speaker by the bar, which runs about halfway along it, with a step down to the back level. Opposite the bar is an open wooden flight of steps up to a currently closed extra bar, and from where Joseph came to say hello. He has business to see to, so unfortunately he’s not able to stick around and see how we get on.

Which is essentially very well, if quite hard work and a little lonely at times. The place really is enormous, with the few customers in here right now spread all the way left and right, and very few people in the middle. We really work the whole area, but we feel spread too thin ourselves this way, but a big impression is still made. Not least when we ascend the staircase and perform, looking far down on everyone, and see that at least a good amount of people in here are looking up. It’s a strange, very disjointed show, purely because of how much space we feel we have to cover to connect with everyone. But while you’re connecting with that table over there, you’re far away from that bunch of tables all the way over there and so on. And when I go to one area and Maja’s all the way over the other area, it’s an impressing dynamic I’m sure, while making it quite hard to be dynamic.

But the hat tells us that people are at least on our side, even as we decided to cut it short after three songs, feeling the room slowly slip away from us after such a strong start, and fearing we could lose it altogether with a fourth song. However, even now, a few people voice disappointment that we’ve finished so soon. And when I go to the raised seating section just by the front door, I’m met very positively both financially and personally and am assured by a few people there that they will help put the word out on us. That really, is everything a tour is about. Getting your own word out there and hoping the people you play for will take it up and put more of it out themselves.

As we walk away from this venue, having played five songs at the first place and three just now, we conclude that, with this kind of hustle, four songs is optimum. Go in with a target of four, pull out at three if it really isn’t working, or is showing signs of maybe testing limits as we felt just now. And then, if shouts come for more, chuck in a fifth. With that, we feel we’ve just consolidated and confirmed exactly how we should be doing this.

Now we hit the backstreets with no destination in mind, until we’re gestured, De Waag like, into a place called Bar T’Achterom. Again, it’s the people sitting outside who see us and beckon us over. The bar manager, Dave, sees this and as soon as we go over to him, indicates that yes, we should play if we want to, as he also indicates there aren’t many people in here. Indeed there aren’t. This is one of those places that looks like a bar/small nightclub. The kind of speckled black floor area, and stage like area at the back which we will not be using. Instead, we’ll set up here at the front where there is one table of people inside near the fully open window, and a few tables of people outside. All seem eager and encouraging, and Dave himself, before hearing a note, offers us a beer. We’re very happy to accept as we set up and get this thing going. And it may well be the smallest and most intimate of places we’ve played today, but it’s our biggest reception and we do indeed get to play that fifth song. And even a sixth as they really do want to hear more and more. Two encores. But we’re not done here yet. As I’m finishing up the hat outside, a few people arrive at the place. They’ve heard something as they were coming down the street and now they’re hearing enthusiastic reports about what we’ve just done here, out of nothing. The lead guy of the new group would like us to continue, but we really are finished. It wouldn’t be right to fire up again. But he has more to say. ‘I will give you 20 euro,’ he says, ‘If you would come out onto the street and play a song for my wife.’ You cannot turn that down, and it’s all in such good nature and in such a good vibe, that yes of course. We’re on our way. So, unplugged, we head out onto the street and down a little way from the bar. He pays us before we even start, and then we launch into I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) just for the benefit of his wife, even as the whole corner of the street stops with people taking in our performance. Some staff and managers even emerge from a few bars to see our street stopping performance, even as we continue to play for just one person who yes, films the whole thing as her personal memento.

We finish to applause and cheers from the full street, and hugs of gratitude from our private audience. It’s only 8pm. We’ve played four times and if we want to, could continue hustling and play three or four more; we could probably jump right into one of those corner bars right now as we’re told one of the people watching us from there was a manager. We’re assured he would be most welcoming if we decided to make the first move. But we feel done and maybe we should join our host for a beer at some point before it gets too late. Before all that, we decide to take our own break from a very successful and busy day. Another round please Dave. Then we take a table outside and hang and chat with the locals, while toasting to a fantastic day in The Hague which we were told couldn’t happen.

Back for more beers to round off the evening and to think about where we might want to tackle next. Between us and France is Belgium. We discount Brussels, thinking it might just be a bit too formal and grown up. For cities in Belgium, that leaves us with Ghent and Antwerp. Antwerp’s nearer, and A comes before G. So yes, with about that much consideration, we have our next destination. There and then, Maja books the hotel.

Day nine
Saturday August 20

So yes, we’re finishing off this tour with a weekend in Antwerp. We arrive at our hotel at about 3:30pm after a wonderfully sunny two and a half hour drive. We’ve just put our bags down and have flopped on the bed when my phone rings. I answer it and a girl introduces herself Julia, one of the two girls we met yesterday who were having the party. Are we still around? Sorry, we’re not. Oh, that would have been interesting. We have a little chat as I enquire about their party and she also asks how we got on. Then she says that anytime we’re ever in The Netherlands again, anywhere in the country, we should let them know. Wow. Just like that, we discover we have something of a start of a student following in Holland.

Well, we’re here now and we should get going quickly enough. We have two days and it’s already deep Saturday afternoon. First, lunch. And a bit of a look around. We leave the hotel and discover that we’re right into the heart of things as a short walk takes us to a long promenade type area, very busy and somewhat near the river. We’re looking straight down what looks like a stretch of kilometres, and the whole thing appears to be just restaurants and bars. Before we even left the hotel we discovered we both really fancied a burger. A proper big bar one with fries or something. We take in a little more of this promenade, but yeah, we really lit up at a place called Ellis Gourmet burger, and a few minutes after walking past it, we’re turning and making our way straight back there. First off, just about the best burgers ever and an absolute perfection of the image I think both of us had when we said, yep, let’s do that. Also a fantastic outside setting. But then the final touch is that this the staff are truly brilliant. I have some experience of this you may know, and I can see when a team of restaurant/bar staff really are working around each other as a team and I totally see that here, along with a complete image of calm, always having time for a quick chat and to make sure everyone is doing well. We ask our guy about places to play, explaining that we’re on tour and are here for two days. He’s straight on it, explaining that the main bar area is up the street from where we are now and points us in the right direction. Now fuelled up and with a great first impression of this city, we thank him very much, go get our gear from the hotel and set off.

Back out again and we haven’t gone very far from the hotel and in the direction we were pointed until we come to what seems like a fairly local bar. We go in and find the manager who says that yes, we could possibly do something in here, but the jukebox is on now and she’ll have to see how many songs have been paid for. She leads us to it and about half an hour of songs are cued up. We’re welcome to wait until that lot’s been played, or we can try later. We thank her for her accommodation and say we may try some other time. Now we begin what is going to be quite a decent walk, loaded as we are, as we discover that Antwerp, not totally unlike Hamburg, has all the bars and venues concentrated in one place and, unlike in Hamburg, our hotel is totally on the other side of the city. Still, it’s a great walk and once we hit the first places, we’re in dense hustling territory.

Down a side street and a few people sitting outside a bar ask if we’re going to play. They’re a little bit on the older side and we’re not entirely sure, but they seem very interested so we go in and check it out. The manager, who we learn is called Azeeza, loves the idea and says sure, go for it. It really is a slightly (muchly) older clientele in here, although there is a sprinkling of slightly younger people. We’re only talking about 10 in total so a quiet early evening audience, but they’re intrigued about the prospect of getting something different, and when we start, they get into it instantly and are with us all the way. Azeeza is dancing her way around the place, and we have a guy in who clearly represents the metal element. Just for him, we pull out a few songs that aren’t total go-to additions for our smash set. My Game, My Rules, which is at times to be fair, and when that goes down brilliantly with him and everyone else, we decide to dust off Nobody Said. Yes. That also works. We declare ourselves done after five songs, but then the encore shout goes out and yes, they want to hear I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) again. How could we possibly refuse? And yes, these guys look after us very generously. We’re invited to stay for a drink but we have hustling to do. With that, Azeeza makes us promise to come back later and claim it then. Yes, come back later, comes back the consensus from an eager new audience. How could we possibly refuse? We’ve almost walked away from the place before we realise we’d never even got the name of it. It isn’t in big obvious lights like most bars, instead being displayed in quite small letters we see now, from the other side of the street. De Leuwvan Vladeren.

Out into the main streets now and the biggest thing we notice is that everyone is sat outside. We keep thinking of hustling bars, but then when we enter them, there’s no-one inside. Then a bar manager tells us that it’s so rarely warm here that no-one wants to miss taking advantage of the lovely weather. Oh dear. So this is kind of what we’re looking at. Bad weather makes for uncomfortable walking around hustling conditions but much better hustling opportunities. Nice weather. Yep, much better to be walking around in doing all this, but not so good for business. We really had never thought of it that way.

It’s the same when we come to Kids, a really central, really big bar that looks like it might well be the place to go around here. Inside it’s all set up for live music with a stage and a very clear live vibe. We meet manager Twist who says they have a band about to play, but he says that if we come round tomorrow sometime between four and five, sure we can play. Wow. Just like that, we have a gig in the book for tomorrow.

A little further along and we find a cool looking corner bar called De Vuile Was, with other corner bars around it. We go and talk to the guys there who seem to be jointly in charge and they’re cool with us having a go. We set up inside but again, people are generally outside, so we go out there and do our thing in the street with the amp up against an open window. The guys here at our terrace are really getting into it, people are coming out of the other bars and checking us out, and people are hanging out of apartment windows and filming us. This goes very well, but during our second song we see the managers of our bar talking to the manager of the bar across the small square. The guy comes back and says we have to stop because we’re disrupting the other bars too much. Oh well. But they’re really cool about it to be fair, and the hat gets a decent amount of action from our little audience. And at one of the tables we get talking to a girl called Kim. She says that her friend Alan runs a bar called The Corner House, a little way across town. We should go and see him. He’d love to have us, she says. We thank her and set off to our new destination.

On the way, on the final street before we come to The Corner House, we see a guy on the other side of the road. He’s looking at us with some little bit of interest and is standing outside some kind of quirky music shop. We wave at each other, and he beckons us across. And just like that we meet Barry, from California, who owns that very cool looking music shop. He’s very interested to hear about what we’re doing and how it’s going and takes a card. We chat to him for quite a while and he says he’ll definitely check us out. Of course we mention the show at Kids tomorrow, which he’s very impressed to hear that we have, but he has plans for around that time so unfortunately won’t be able to make it. No worries. Some other time maybe.

Now we walk that last hundred metres or so to The Corner House. There, instead of meeting Alan, we meet a guy called Sufian who says he took over the place some time ago. Oh. OK. We talk about what’s going on anyway, and he says he’d love to have us now but the place is totally empty. But please come back again tomorrow and if there’s any sign of a few people being around he’d love us to play. Brilliant.

We’re quite far off the beaten track now but there is another bar or two nearby, and Sufian points us in the direction of an Irish bar. But when we get there we just feel the vibe is all wrong, and nothing else of the limited options around here feels right. Well, we’ve played two shows today, got a good feel for the place, and it’s going to be getting on a little by the time we arrive back in the main area. Also, with the long walk out in the first place, we’re kind of almost walked out. And we have to get back to the hotel yet tonight as well. We’ve also got two gigs in the bag for tomorrow so that’s a result in itself. So we decide to call it for today and go for that drink at De Leuwvan Vladerenthere.

As soon as we arrive, we’re welcomed enthusiastically by a few people who are still there from when we played, and by Azeeza, who’s now semi off duty and has a table out front where we join her and other assorted locals for a drink. Almost immediately, her and Maja get talking and between them, arrange for us to play here tomorrow at eight. Damn. That’s three gigs in the book for tomorrow now. Practically no need for hustling anymore. Another drink after this one? How could we possibly refuse?

Day 10
Sunday August 21

Oh wow. Today it’s like we’re on an actual real tour. Final day of the thing and we have a full schedule actually booked. Three shows in the diary. So also, for the very first time, no need at all to go out and hustle. And we only arrived in this city yesterday, totally cold with no contacts having been made ever. With all that being the case, we have a very slow morning followed by a lovely lunch in one of the restaurants in that nearby practical restaurant city. Then, 4pm, like proper touring pros, we’re off for our first engagement at Kid’s. We’re totally delighted to have landed a gig here because it seems, as far as bar gigs are concerned around here at least, Kid’s is the most prestigious gig in town. Right in the centre, hugely prominent, hugely popular judging by the crowds we saw here last night. And by far the most custom built and apparently storied live music venue we’ve seen in Antwerp.

We arrive at Kid’s at around 4pm and the place is totally empty. Also, Twist isn’t there. However, the duty manager is and he says Twist told him to expect us and to have us play outside where there are five or six people currently hanging out and where it’s hoped a few more may come along. OK. We can do that. We get ourselves set up, give cards to the few occupied tables – maybe 10 people by the time we’re about to start – and get going. Well, this really becomes a thing as we rip it up between the outdoor tables and quickly get the attention of the whole street. This is a wide pedestrianised area with bars all along both sides and a good amount of foot traffic in between. We don’t attract too many people to actually come to this bar, sit down and spend money, but we do practically stop the foot traffic in its tracks as the scene in front of us transforms into something of an open air festival, complete with people standing in the middle of it all and dancing as we continue to do our thing. And it’s out there that we begin to project our energy as this starts to be in danger of becoming some kind of event. The people around us also totally come to it as we start to feel like we’re the only thing happening in town right now. And this is where we pull out Make Me Shine for the first time. Not the most assured we’ve ever performed a new song, but it certainly does seem to bring out the air drummer in people. While out there in pedestrianisedville, hands are being pumped into the air like we’re in a summer’s field main event stage.

When we finish, a guy called Coch buys us drinks and we sit with him and his friends, one of whom we at least learn is called Jack. They are regulars of decades standing here. As I might say, the taste setters among the cognoscenti. And they approve. ‘I would rather see The Diaries than U2 anyday,’ he exclaims, almost to the ether as he contentedly faces up to the sun, beer in hand. Now to us: ‘You guys have such an energy and an honesty of performance and with some really good songs. It was fantastic to see.’ We’ll take that.

As we’re basking in the same sun and a few more warm words from a few more people, we become aware of the shadow a gun holstered policeman talking quite sternly with the guys, who are all pictures of innocence. No idea what he’s talking about it seems. When he’s gone, we ask what that was all about. Apparently, some people in apartments across the road called the police to complain about us. The police were hearing reports of something that sounded like a riot and now here they are.

Oh wow. On our last tour we got kicked out of our hotel. Now here we are in Antwerp being accused of starting a riot and having the police called on us. All from one completely effectless acoustic guitar and a single vocalist.

The policeman, if anything, seems bemused, and doesn’t even register our presence, sitting right next to him, guitar case propped up against a chair. Who? Us? While he’s thinking, ‘What? Them?’ It’s like we’ve come, smashed, and are now invisible.

But almost as mad as the police being called on us is the report we hear that Twist made of us yesterday when he let it be known we would be coming. Apparently he said that he’d booked a folk act. Just a guy on acoustic with his girlfriend singing. A lovely little sway in the sun he seems to have had us down as. Yeah right. Just wait till you get the police report.

We would love to stay and have another beer, and indeed are invited to, but like the trend setting, riot inciting tour musicians we are, we have an engagement to get to. And another after that, so it’s time to rock on.

We arrive at the Corner House and damn. It’s empty again. Sufian profusely apologises. Not his fault. Empty is the last thing he wanted. He wishes us all the best and we thank him very much just for being up for it. I think now would be a good time to bring to your attention that over these past few days, in The Hague and now in Antwerp, we’ve yet to be told no by a single venue. There has been a time or two we’ve not covered when a manager or decision maker hasn’t been around, but apart from that, where someone had it in their gift, not one person has turned us down.

No gig, but we’re in the vicinity of Barry’s place so we decide to go by there on the way back and see if it’s open and if he’s around. Oh well. The shop’s closed. But as we stand there talking, he hear us us and and comes out to the street and asks how it’s been going. We fill him in, and then tell him about tonight’s show that we booked last night. He says he’ll come.

By 7:30, we’re back in De Leuwvan Vladerenthere where we’re now apparently recognised regulars on just our second day in town. A few guys are there from yesterday and they’ve brought a few more friends who are eager to see what all the fuss is about, and yes, a buzz ignites around the place when we walk back in. We’re set up by a little before 8 and the clamour begins for us to begin. But we want to wait until at least eight to give Barry a chance to get here. Afterall, our shows are so short that if we start ten minutes early and someone arrives five minutes late, they’re lucky to catch one song and maybe an encore. By ten past eight, the calls for us to start are becoming a bit too hard to ignore so we decide that yes, we really should just get on with it. Almost as soon as we start getting ourselves ready, Barry walks in. He came. Just brilliant. And we’re on.

Yes, this does become the biggest show of the past three days. We’re playing to people who could almost be regarded as fans by now, they’re delighted friends, and the wonderfully enthusiastic Azeeza who is something of a cheerleader for us by now. And Barry who is wide eyed in joyful shock as we practically rock the beers off the tables. When we’re done, the party continues and we jump right in, circulating and chatting to all the regulars around the place and staying all the way to closing time.

Tour over with a totally triumphant last performance and de facto party, we set off on our walk all the way through town back lto the hotel. On the last leg, we see the juke box bar we tried our luck in on that first leg out yesterday. No, we’re not thinking of hustling it. How could we possibly top that last show? We’re done. But we would quite like another drink or two to keep this evening going. And dammit. We’re in full on relaxation mode now, tour all done and only the journey home left. No more hustling, no more left to prove. At least for now. We approach the bar and it is indeed still open, which is to say there are still people in there enjoying the evening. But no. We’re informed as we reach the doors that it’s closed. Oh well. We tried. But inside we’re greeted by Miguel and Eddie who were at our last show, and the one in the same bar yesterday. They enthusiastically welcome us in, even though the bar will remain closed. But just like that, we’re transformed in the eyes of the staff and locals and then introduced to a guy called Jelle. He comes and talks to us and we’re told he’s the guy who knows about music around here. We have a great feeling for him immediately, which is reciprocated as he says he’s off to a bar that’s open till 5am, and would we like to come? Oh yes. Yes please. So, saying goodbye to our new friends in here, we set off deep into the back streets to be led to a bar practically no tourist would ever see.

It’s not massively big and looks something like a taverna. Cold hard floors, a few tables lining the window, a bar running almost the whole length of it with neatly arranged bar stools. And a game machine at the back. We buy our beers, including of course taking care of Jelle’s, and join him with a few regulars he knows at a table down on the floor.

Of course, talk soon turns to what we’ve been doing here, and our tour, and our experiences in general, then curiosity to what we actually sound like. Well, only one way for everyone to find out. Is it our most sober and professional performance ever? Maybe. Maybe not. Is it loud, raucous, and cheered and stomped at? Oh yes. And now we are done. Totally, completely. Concluded at an almost secret late late night bar in the back streets of Antwerp, saluted by the last standing locals of the weekend. A perfect end to a city that has given us just the best welcome and experience. As we’ve made it ourselves, so it has responded in as good a way as we could possibly have hoped, and more. As with Berlin, with Antwerp we believe we may have found another of our touring homes. A place we feel we can return to and develop on what we have achieved in just these two days. And that is what international touring is all about. We will be back.

Day 11
Monday August 22

Breakfast in the town centre. A quite superlative vegan falafel on the restaurant strip. This sets us up perfectly for our drive to our small hotel in France. And that’s all she wrote for today.

Day 12
Tuesday August 23

Up and out by 12, in perfectly good time to go wine shopping in France before leisurely trundling to the ferry. European tour number two. You were great to us. Thankyou. You are done.

The Album Diary, days one to 65

Day one
Wednesday August 24

First, much of our time for the foreseeable here will be days of continuing to record our debut album and as we said a Diary or so ago, we won’t be chronicling that day by day or session by session. Instead we’ll wait until the album is done and then give a little (or not so little) rundown on how the recording of each song went. So expect whole chunks of days with little or no Diary content and assume we’re either in the studio or just doing not much of anything at all. Assume we’re in the studio.

But first we have to get there and we drive through Ireland today from the south and we’re back home by 1pm. During that last little leg we have a chat about this thing we do when we just turn up and play and decide to call it the Now Hustle.

Day two
Thursday August 25

Right. We’re going to have a nice few chilled non playing days and/or go into the studio. Not so. Maja decides she wants to carry right on playing and announces she’s found an open mic in Dublin tonight, which would make it our first ever Dublin appearance. Oh. OK. Yes. Lets. It’s at a place called Ma O’Reilleys in Rathmines in the southern area of the city, a little way from the main touristy hustle and bustle of Templebar.

We drive up there, all packed up with our usual car supplies. I’ve never gone on such a mission for an open mic before. Yet another first I suppose. We find Ma O’Reilleys and it looks really quite small from the street. But once inside, it goes back and back, as so many bars in Dublin do. And then, past the quite small initial bar area, you descend a small flight of stairs and there’s the wide open venue area. All old style, charming uneven floor and large upturned barrels for tables. You know the thing. Then, past the stage, the venue continues on the right hand side with even more seating and tables. These places really do go on and on.

We’re introduced to host Dave, otherwise known as Chef, and with that, we’re on the list and all set. Before it all starts, we chat to a few people and it’s generally a really welcoming atmosphere. In contrast to at least one open mic you may remember us playing in Hamburg where, while it wasn’t quite unwelcoming, the performers just didn’t mingle too much and we barely spoke to anyone. Here, as I expected really given my extensive experience of the Irish open mic scene, there really is a sense of community as we watch so many interactions going on all over the place. And some of them come and say hello to us. Berlin was a bit like this too to be fair. We also chat to a guy sitting behind us who’s never played an open mic, but would like to and is here tonight to see how it all goes down. It’s really cool to be able to give him a few pointers and, hopefully, a little encouragement for his own future performances.

When our turn comes, Maja heads to the stage and I hang back somewhere in the middle of the room, guitar on. Our wireless is all plugged into the mixing desk and we’re ready to go. As Maja’s standing there, one of the earlier performers sees me all primed and comes up to me to ask when I’m going on. Now, I say. I’m with her. ‘Oh, I really didn’t realise. OK.’ With that, I can see the very real interest with which he is now regarding us, one performer on stage, the other essentially still with the audience. And it begins. Maja holds the stage for a while as I charge all around the place. Then I make my way to the stage and it’s Maja’s turn to come out and roam. Then, when we hit a gentle part of our two song set I spot an empty stool at a large table near the stage with six or seven people sitting round it. I gently wander over to their table and sit down and join them, still playing while Maja continues to do her thing. Then, as we explode, I’m up again. Then we’re both on the stage, then exit stage right, exit stage left to continue to work the venue. Yep. We certainly are giving an account of ourselves at our first Dublin appearance and our first Irish open mic.

When it’s all over, we head back to our seats, greeted all the way down the venue. And especially at the back as our virgin open mic friend exuberantly receives us. When the time comes to leave, we’re called over by a few guys who are clearly among the top music dogs around here. First, they just want to say great show. Second, they eagerly want to tell us about another open mic in town we really should check out. At the Eile in Templebar. Brilliant. Thanks a lot lads. We’ll check it out.

Day three
Friday August 26

Right. Time to call Roy, our prospective Irish booker, or whatever it is he’s thinking of doing with us. Remember him? He’s the guy who said he saw us in our last show at The Trap. The 3 Arena booking guy who said he could get us big shows and we should call when we get back from Europe. It’s with some anticipation that I’ve been waiting to make that call and the time is now. I call from my English number, the number that’s on our cards. No reply. Oh. That’s anticlimactic. It happens. OK. A little later I call from my Irish number. The phone is answered and I introduce myself as Mark from The Diaries. The line cuts. I call again and get an engaged tone. OK. Phone issues. So I send an SMS. Mark here, guy you saw and asked to get in touch. Phone issues. Call me when you get the chance. I am paraphrasing here. I’ll tell you now, that message is never replied to and no call comes. This is disappointing to say the least and we’re having trouble getting our heads round it. We have to conclude that Roy’s been round the town for ages talking himself up and basically acting the big I Am. Then when he’s introduced to someone and actually has to deliver, he’s essentially and inadvertently had his bluff called. Now the time has come and he can’t actually follow up and deliver on anything he’s always said he is. Meaning the guy’s a bluffer, an imposter, a fraud and a general spouter of hot air. It becomes clear what’s happened. I’ve called on my UK number, the number on the card and he’s recognised it and ignored it – Oh damn. I can’t talk to those guys. I have nothing and I’m just going to be exposed for the charlatan and big talking wannabe that I am. Then, when I’ve called on the Irish number, he’s quickly realised I’ve got him and hung up in a panic. Now he’s been found out, backed into a corner and he has no idea how to respond. So he doesn’t. Maybe he’s decided he doesn’t like us afterall, you may be thinking. Maybe. Well, the big man, or an actual real big man, would take the call, apologise, say he’s decided we’re not quite for him afterall and wish us luck. But no. The second he’s been asked to step up and stand behind his words he’s gone and hid behind them instead. Pathetic. And yeah. As we absorb his failed contact with reality, initially very disappointing. We really thought we had something here. But all along, that little token of promise we’ve been carrying around with us for the past few weeks has turned out to be a forgery all along. Oh well. We carry on.

We do that immediately with Maja talking to the Songwriter Collective running that open mic we were told about at Bar Eile. We’re on the list for this coming Wednesday.

Day four
Saturday August 27

We haven’t yet done it but we have had a go at trying to couch surf on our tours, but ended up doing the hostel/hotel/camping thing. But we’re on the system so if you’re asking you really have to be offering as well, and we are. This afternoon we receive our first guest, an American living in Dublin and having a bit of a bike travel around the country. At around 4pm we’re very happy to welcome Quirk to our house and he’s a fantastic guest and the three of us just get into it with a lovely lazy afternoon. It’s pretty cool when we take him out back to show him where he can park his bike and also to introduce him to our back garden. He’s totally blown away when he sees what this place is. An enormous gravel and moss expanse dominated by two old style 19th century ruined mill buildings, in between which you walk to come to the river at the bottom of it all. Yes, it is a spectacular setting to be living in and to have as your own private garden. And fantastic to experience the wonder of it through someone else’s eyes.

After that, we settle a bit, then it’s drinks in the garden in the shadow of ‘our’ mill buildings. Then a roast dinner before we head out to introduce him to some of the wonderful nightspots of Clara, in tonight’s case, The Trap and then Nigel’s Place. He’s found us by reading this very Diary and decided he just had to see our world for himself. So yeah, before we go out we give him a live blast in the kitchen of I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Out into The Trap and the regulars do us proud, especially when I introduce Quirk for the first time and one of our friends sings back at me, ‘I like you better when you’re naked.’ Yep. He’s now seen it for himself. It really happens.

Day five
Sunday August 28

After a great night last night, which continued back at ours until sometime around 3/4am, we’re all off to bed. We knew Quirk was off this morning by 7:30am. We said goodbye last night. No way we were getting up that early. We come down to a wonderful bottle of wine sitting on the kitchen table. Class. He could have presented it last night and had us say thankyou and everything, but then we all know it would have been opened last night – what else would you do? But no. He clearly wanted us to have it to ourselves and us alone, so he’s just dropped it silently into being. Thankyou very much night. It was amazing to meet you and what a wonderful night.

Day five
Wednesday August 31

Another day, another Dublin open mic. This time at Bar Eile just south of Templebar. We get there early because we intend to do a bit of a hustle around Templebar. This is intended to be a Now Hustle, so we may get a show or two or even three in before the open mic tonight. Just imagine that. Turning up to an open mic for the first time and telling people you’ve already played three shows that day. Afterall, we managed to play four times by around 8pm in The Hague in our one day there, so Templebar? We’ve really got this, right?

Wrong.

I really don’t want to get into writing detail about this. Bottom line. It took us around four hours and six kilometres of walking and hustling to discover that Templebar is not the place for us. Not a single sausage could be found. Sure, original gigs do happen plenty around here. But for a Diaries’ Now Hustle, that dog just don’t hunt. Everywhere, and I mean everywhere, was coverbar city or just not suitable for us – a lot of bars with lots of different little sections and alcoves. Lovely for hangouts, not so lovely for creating an all in it together show atmosphere. That’s not to say the day went off without its mild interest in what we were doing, but to actually get in and play somewhere, just no. Like Galway, we discovered that Templebar is just too bang on tourist and cover oriented with so many bars having booking agents, or their music just totally tied up. And with it being a Now Hustle, we carried our gear around for those six kilometres without getting the relative rest of a gig. We’re hurting by the time we hobble back to Bar Eile. OK. At least we’ve learned a lesson from another crash and burn. Let’s just do a nice open mic, introduce ourselves to these lovely people and go home.

We do indeed find a friendly and welcoming crowd, and a few familiar faces from Thursday at Ma O’Reilleys. One of them, singer/ songwriter Mark L’estrange, runs his own podcast interviewing creative people including songwriters. We get talking to him and he really likes our story and asks if he could do an interview with us there and then. Brilliant. Yes. He’s as delighted as we are as he says he’s never done of these live and in situ before. So we do our first ever interview as an open mic is going through its soundcheck.

You can hear that here:
https://open.spotify.com/episode/1HNfnzlTVgJkA6JamzPSl3
And see Mark’s Spotify site here:
https://open.spotify.com/show/5TCdO32br6Kphg2cCTnmiq

As for this being an open mic, it isn’t actually called that, instead it’s called the Songwriter Collective and is run by email with all the performers already arranged to play and is in a function room above the pub meaning that while it is actually open to the public, it’s not so much advertised or set up as such. This is a place for songwriters to come together, play their songs to each other and maybe try out their own new material in a forgiving and supportive environment. Cool. We’re down with that.

When our turn comes, we blast into I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) with Maja on the stage area and me running all around the place. She will have her turn out here of course as we develop and get into our thing. Only, tonight is one of those nights and we don’t. Halfway through I sense something’s wrong. The guitar’s tuning seems off. Then, as I’m pondering this, the top string just goes. It just goes. Bang and it’s broken. I stop, then Maja, confused, stops, and I say, ‘Sorry guys. A string has just broke.’ Then someone points out that no it hasn’t. Instead, the string bridge pin – the thing that holds the string – has come loose. Oh. OK. I pop it back, retune, and we’re off again. We just about limp to the end of the song when I see that it’s come loose again and, like our painful walk that got us to this venue in the first place, I barely limp along to the end. I do this by trying to stay away from the E string as much as possible. That done, I try to get the pin back in again but it just ain’t happening. I’ll say now that this is all happening live on stage with an expectant audience and I want to get the show back on the road, like, now. So it’s fair to say my presence of mind to do the right thing isn’t quite right. The right thing would be to calmly take the peg out altogether, detune the string, then put the peg in, just like you were restringing a guitar, and tune up again. All sorted. But no. I’m trying to get it in with the string fully tuned up. I even start to try to hammer it in with the capo – gently-ish. But hammering and generally making banging noises all the same. Do not try that at home. Or at an open mic with an audience of musicians watching. No-one will lend you a guitar. Or something like that. Another thing that could happen is your string bridge pin could totally break in two.

So that’s all we get to do and I am not a happy bunny. In the heat of the moment, all I can think is, one broken guitar. In the middle of a show. But it’s only a pin thing, but still, apart from the guitar, that’s one broken performance and we’ve come all this way, walked all round what is essentially the capital of Ireland’s music scene for no result, and now this. Not even a full account of one song after driving – and walking – all this way.

But yet again, we discover we only need one song to make an impact and that sometimes it really can all be about just making that three or so minutes happen. After we’ve stayed to enjoy the rest of the performances, we have a steady stream of people coming to greet us and say how much of an impact we had tonight. A standout is someone who says, ‘You guys had us pinned to the wall.’ OK. We have managed to make it all worth it.

Day 25
Tuesday September 20

It’s that time again, with Maja taking a 10 day trip to visit Sweden. So take it that not much is going to happen in Diaryland until at least the first days of October.

Day 37
Sunday October 2

Maja’s birthday and we decide this is going to be done with a day out in Athlone. And we really do Athlone quite well, hitting all the bars we’ve seen and hustled and really liked the look of. Sean’s Bar, the first place we hit, remains the highlight of what is a great day. Apart from anything else, this is possibly the oldest bar in the world; no-one actually knows for a fact the oldest, but Sean’s Bar dates back to the 900s and, at the very least, is acknowledged as the oldest bar in Europe. And what a place. The main front bar, while wonderfully appointed, feels like a trip back in time, complete with a part of the original ancient wall mounted behind glass. The bar staff are knowledgeable, proud of their place of work, and enthusiastic to answer questions and engage in discussion about the building and it’s history, or anything else you care to chat about really. Including guiding you through the drink options. Yes, they really know their stuff in here.

Then, if you pass through the bar, there’s is plenty more to explore as the place has expanded and expanded through the years. It just goes on and on, right out back and up a flight of stairs and into a whole other bar. Empty right now, but also with a great selection and all set up for a birthday party for later. We hi-jack the party decorations and take a few photos with Maja, making it look like all this was laid out for her.

After Sean’s Bar, we also take in Peddlar Macs, a huge and cavernous live music venue which we have almost all to ourselves right now. So we settle in at the bar, chat to the bar staff and watch the football. Then it’s off to The Dark Horse. This is a venue we’ve always very much wanted to play, but anytime we’ve been here, there’s been either no manager around or the staff has simply been too busy to really be able to try to talk to. It’s like that today as well but anyway, we’re not on the hustle. Instead, we settle in as punters only and enjoy the attentions of the very friendly and accommodating staff. While here, it’s time for lunch/dinner, and that’s provided with a simply amazing nacho plate. Three bars and Athlone, you have served us very well today. We might have visited more places, but with the footy on, a few bars were too rowdy for our purposes here today, so we very happily take what we got.

Now for the train back to Clara and once there, we continue with the day, first dropping into Dolans. We’re there, enjoying a quiet pint and chatting with a few of the regulars when Maja gets a gentle tap on the shoulder. It’s someone saying a friend of theirs has recognised us from seeing us live. That friend has only ever seen us on video, was too shy to come herself, and we’re now being asked if we could go down into the next bar room to meet her and get some pictures. Absolutely. Down we go – it’s a split level bar, so a few steps down. We meet the friend who says very little and doesn’t even look at us that much. We happily pose for pictures with her. Then everyone else with her wants to have their picture taken with us too. We’re only too happy to do that as well. That done, it’s us who gratefully offer our thanks, and we head back up. ‘The price of fame eh?’ says one of our companions. Yeah. Apparently that happens to us now.

After this, we go to The Trap to finish off. There, word of Maja’s birthday gets around and she’s pulled into dancing with a whole bunch of people before having Happy Birthday sung for her. What a wonderful way to round off what has been an absolutely fantastic day.

Day 41
Thursday October 6

We decide to take some time out from recording to go hustling again. You might remember we checked out Mullingar some time ago, so today we go to do it for real. When we arrive and park, we see a pub straight across the road and go and introduce ourselves. The place is called Columbia, and the manager is outside the main bar under some kind of alcove and organising the slightly outdoor seating area. We have a quick chat with him and immediately he’s like, ‘Yeah sure. Come back at eight. We have a comedy night on. You can play before that if you want.’ Job done.

Out and back into the town and we think about places we saw last time, and decide to go for a bar called Dolans. We go in and it’s all a slightly older crowd. The guy behind the bar, who’s called Kian, is a supervisor rather than a manger, but in a rare departure from convention, he says no problem. Go for it. Brilliant. He may well have been prompted by the locals’ reaction to us turning up with a guitar because as soon as we walked in, they perked up and asked if we were going to play for them. ‘If the boss will have it,’ I say. Cue Kian.

We start to set up and people start to ask what we play. When we say it’s poprock and our own originals, some disappointment goes up that we’re not trad. One guy actually finishes his pint and walks out in some level of protest or disappointment, but everyone else stays, fuelled by a quite strong sense of curiosity.

As soon as we start, we feel their polite curiosity turn to, first something approaching acceptance, then, among some at least, maybe even a gleeful enjoyment. We’re doing well if there’s ten people in here, but almost all of them are tapping their feet and some are trying to sing along. Yes. Early walkout notwithstanding, we have won this little crowd over.

We play our four songs and then finish with all good wishes being called out. Now we head to a bar called Dalys. It’s a little after 7pm and if we can get a quick yes, we can fit another gig in before Columbia.

In Dalys we meet barmen Dan and John who say the manager is around somewhere. We wait a while, with Dan in particular being very interested to hear what we’re about. But time ticks by and there’s no sign of the manager. We’re asked if we can come back another day, but no. We’re doing Mullingar today and no idea when we might return. It’s clear the manager is far too busy to see anyone and time starts to press us to get to Columbia for eight. We thank Dan and John for their time and interest and head on over.

Once in Columbia, we’re led through the bar to the comedy room, which is in a small beer garden, meaning it’s outside. Oh OK. Cool. Maja is wearing her most flamboyantly colourful jacket meaning people assume she’s a comedian. Well, she is here to perform so it’s good she stands out. But no. We’re here to do our thing before the comedy. While Maja sets up, I go back out into the bar area to tell people who we are, what we do, and to let them know we’re about to start. I succeed in pulling a few people in, one of whom is a fledgling singer songwriter himself and really keen to check us out.

It’s not quite 8pm, but the small beer garden is now about as full as it can be so we might as well start. All I can say is we just rock the place. We’re all over it, with Maja at times totally dominating the stage and then the whole space. By the time we’re finished, after five songs and an encore, we’re totally spent and it feels the audience isn’t far behind us. I think we’ve set it all up pretty well for the comedians now. Come in and do your thing. We were planning on sticking around for some of that, but we think it’s the right time now to just say thankyou and make an exit and head on home. No more hustling for tonight. So that’s what we do.

Day 42
Friday Oct 7

Another day, another hustle. And why not? Let’s just keep going. Dublin today, or more accurately, the outskirts of Dublin, as we decided after our Templebar debacle. And to be even more accurate, Dalkey. A wonderful looking small town we discovered last Friday on a drive and walk around after a city based errand. It’s a really lovely looking, high end town, full of images you might see on a postcard and restaurants for that special occasion. And it fits into our thoughts of hustling out of centre Dublin towns to try to attack Dublin that way rather than penetrate the centre which, as we discovered, is already pretty sewn up. If we can build a reputation in Dublin out here, maybe that could carry us into the centre.

We start at the top of the town, planning to work our way down. We do that very quickly because every venue says no, although we do get a few invitations to come back some other time. This isn’t quite as brutal a rejection as it may seem. In some places the manager wasn’t around, while a few have other things going on tonight so experimenting with something brand new and unseen isn’t really on their agenda. Fair enough.

We get to the end of the road – literally – and all that’s left to try is the Dalkey Duck. We go in and meet the manager, Joel, just as he’s leaving for the night. He has his coat on, backpack. All ready to go. But he stops and is happy to have a little chat with us and listen to our pitch. Very simply, he says, ‘I likek it. Have a look around. See where you think and go for it.’

And so we do, setting ourselves up in the centre of four sections of a very alcoved bar. So we’re not really playing to any section, but are instead able to wander about and have a go at all of them. And yes it works. We really work all the areas, pull most people into seeing what we’re about, and yes, they very much talk to the hat afterwards. Dalkey, and especially Joel, you came through in the end. Thankyou very much.

Having exhausted the possibilities here, we’re not entirely sure what to do next so we decide to head on home, but avoid the motorway for a while to keep an eye out for potential places. In this way we find ourselves driving through the village of Sallynoggins, which has one huge pub, seemingly situated behind a petrol station. We go and park up and walk in with all our hustling gear. When we do this, we do this ready to go, even if the car is right outside and it’s the only place in town/the village.

We go in and the place really is absolutely cavernous. There’s a bar at the far end, not much tableage in between us and it, and all the way off to the left are some stairs leading up to another raised level which could be a huge stage if they chose to play it that way. It looks like the place could hold a few thousand people all standing and staring at that stage if someone were to take on that challenge. As for the locals, they really aren’t taking advantage of this enormous place they have and most action is around the bar with high tables there, and people sitting around the actual thing. We go and are directed towards a guy called Dylan who, like Kian just yesterday in Mullingar, is a supervisor rather than a manager. But, just like Kian, he very quickly and easily says, ‘Cool with me guys,’ and points us to the actual stage area, across from the bar and in the corner, to the right of the front door as you come in. We go and set up over there and almost immediately, stage lighting comes on and bathes us. But we have no intention of staying here for our show.

As we set up, a few regulars are very interested to hear what’s about to happen, and a few in particular really want to hear our story and totally love it. They’re sold. The whole place then starts to take note as me and Maja set ourselves up in totally different areas of the bar, and signal to each other that we’re ready. And bang, off we go. This is a really special show which at times sees us being almost 20 yards apart and working totally different parts of the bar at the same time. I concentrate quite a lot on the high ‘stage’ area to the left which has six or seven young guys hanging around a table next to a pool table. Oh, they love that. And even more when Maja comes up to join me and we really do turn this area into a stage from which to perform to the whole populace from up on high. Then we go back down and generally just meander and prowl all over the huge floor, then at times into the more intimate feeling bar surroundings. And of course we give our new friends plenty. Dalkey might have been a tad of a letdown, although it got salvaged in the end, but Sally Noggins is what’s made today’s trip out here truly worthwhile. It really is one of the big and memorable ones for us.

Day 46
Tuesday October 11

A momentous day today as we receive the email we’ve been waiting for. It contains an attachment of our first mixed and mastered, ready for release album track. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). This goes straight up on around 15 platforms through an online distribution service. It’s been a long, hard studio road to get here, but The Diaries are finally out into the real world.

Day 49
Sunday October 16

Maja:
We’re still feeling a little bit tired from the emotional roller coaster it’s been to host our couchsurfer friends and from losing our shower and replacing it with visits to the swimming pool. But today, it’s time to go gigging again. Or at least try to.

As the evening draws near the rain continues to fall. I mean we’re no strangers to rain here in Ireland, but this is something spectacular. Last night I woke up at 3 AM to the biggest skyfall I’ve experienced so far. It wasn’t like pitter patter, it was like, SPLASH! And as the evening draws near, it’s picking up again. We load the car up at around 7 pm, and have to run from the house to the parking lot just to avoid the equipment from being destroyed by rain. As I set out on the road, the rain is absolutely smashing down. It’s just picking up more and more. I have the wipers on max and wish they could go faster as I struggle to drive 30 m/h on a 100 km/h dark country road. This is by far the strongest rainfall in which I’ve ever driven.

As we arrive at the Pull Inn in Pollagh, the rain shows no sign of stopping. We park up next to the door, grab our gear, and run in through the door, not having any idea what’s going to await us inside.

The pub is packed. It’s a small pub but it is absolutely packed and some people are even standing without any barchairs close by just having a pint. And now everyone is looking at us. We’re smiling as the most common question gets asked ‘Are you going to play here tonight?’ ‘Maybe, we’re just asking for permission first’. And with that we make our way into the bar, and ask the bargirl. She runs to ask her manager for permission. As she’s doing this, the owner of the bar, Gary, walks in through the entry doorway. ‘Oh, The Diaries! How are ye doin? Ye playing tonight?’

Now we are.

We start setting up, which is now a very quick process with minimal equipment. Mark goes away to tune up the guitar, and I connect our PA to a plug socket I find in a corner somewhere and turn on our wireless equipment for my microphone and Mark’s guitar. When Mark comes back from tuning we do a short line check for the levels, ‘one, two’. Then we’re off. It’s literally this simple nowadays. If we use the toilet and ask for some water at the bar which we usually do, the whole thing takes maybe five minutes. It’s incredibly smooth and quick and everyone is so used to it taking more time so we’re always met with impressed surprised faces.

And off we go. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). And the crowd of maybe 20 people is shouting, cheering and bobbing along. It just continues like this. And when I hit the money notes, the big notes that continue for a really long time, I can hear how the crowd is just exploding into applause, going harder and harder with their shouts the more I carry on. It’s amazing. Just such a confidence boost for me.

In this manner we do four songs, and an encore. Then, as we get ready to do the hat, thinking we’re done, we get convinced to just keep going. Forget the encore. Just keep going. This is coming from Gary, the owner, and everyone is cheering him on. We have to do this.

It’s a bit much for me vocally to keep up only playing big songs like this, but we go for it. Another three songs. And oh my god. I wish we had been recording this. This is just the best gig so far. The cheers are deafening, the crowd are completely getting into it. It’s like we transformed this little countryside bar into the coolest rock concert on earth. That’s what it feels like.

As we finish, I’m also screaming yeah, at the top of my lungs, with my hands in a victory pose over my head, totally embracing the explosion of the pub.

As we’re packing up to leave, something that’s never happened to me before happens. A stranger comes up to me, shakes my hand and tells me ‘You are an amazing singer.’ Thank you so much. No-one ever praises the singer. I think it’s just assumed that they know they’re good because if the band gets praise, that means the singer gets praise as well. People don’t really feel the need to tell the singer specifically that they were amazing. So to finally be told this, is amazing to me. Wow.

Mark:

All that stuff Maja just said about singers rarely being singled out for praise is, in my experience with many fantastic singers I’ve worked with, absolutely true.

Now into the car we go. And the rain has stopped. If it hadn’t, we would have gone straight home, probably at super slow speed again. But as it is, after a show like that, let’s just keep going. And we feel like going safe. So Ferbane it is to target Hennessy’s, where Fionulla was such a supporter of ours. But when we get there, the place is totally empty, apart from one guy who looks at us like we’ve just dropped out of the sky before suggesting we try Gleesons down the road. Everyone’s in there, he says, and he’ll be popping down himself soon.

So we go and have a go at hustling Gleesons. The manager’s up for it so we set up, introduce ourselves around the bar, and hit our first song. It feels OK, but just kind of a little bit off. We finish to a smattering of applause and we hesitate a little as we think of what to play next. This isn’t our usual kind of exuberant flow. As we’re just deciding on Rock’n’Roll Tree, the manager, says, ‘Sorry lads, this just isn’t the place for it tonight.’ Oh. OK. It happens. He sounds apologetic as he continues, ‘Some old university friends are in here for a catch up after quite a few years and they really just want to talk rather than have loud music going on, and they came in here because it was quiet.’ You know what? Fair enough. But it’s still not a nice feeling to have to go and meekly take your gear down after being told to stop playing. We do it with good grace, and a few of the guys in here are kind enough to make a point to tell us they were really enjoying it and it’s a shame we’re having to leave. Again. OK. Great. Thankyou very much.

So we head back off to the car, passing Hennessy’s on the way. As we do, the guy who directed us to Gleesons comes out. We stop and chat to him and he introduces himself as Tommy. He’s massively surprised we’re not playing and says he was on his way to see us. We tell him what happened, and then he tells us what just happened to him. It seems he was a bit too shocked to say anything earlier on. He’s been following us online through our Youtube videos for some time, he says. He’s been into all our adventures across Europe, especially Germany, and just assumed we were a German based band. Then, out of nowhere, on a ridiculously quiet night in his local, we just walked in the door. This European internationally travelling band he’s become a fan of. He just had no idea how to react. It seemed too surreal and simply not possible. And now he’s equally shocked to hear that not only are we actually based in Ireland, but just a few miles down the road from him in the tiny town of Clara. He’s also quite disappointed that, once he’d got over his shock, that he had the opportunity to see us live, and now we’ve been stopped from playing. We tell him we’re thinking of heading to Banaher now, the next town further down the road. We can’t guarantee him a show, but would he like to come with us. Yes. Yes, he would love that. As we get in the car and set off, he says, ‘I feel famous now. I can’t believe I’m actually in the touring car with The Diaries.’ Oh wow. We really can’t let him down. This hustle has to work.

I am delighted to report that once we get to Banaher, we decide on the large, well lit and lively looking corner bar, named for some reason, The Corner House. We arrive just 20 minutes before closing and once he hears we’re only looking for a short show, the manager in there is well up for it, and all the regulars are equally keen. After what I’m sure has been a lovely but quietish evening, they now have the prospect of some live music to round it all off. We give them exactly what they had no idea they were looking for. Or probably they even weren’t, but here it is. Diary Shaped, Pollagh warmed up, Ferbane rejected, and fully up for it now. And this lively and happy crowd is with us every step of the way. Up front, mingling very nicely, and euphoric in something like disbelief, Tommy is almost acting as cheerleader. A few nights ago we had it really big at Sallynoggins. What’s happening here tonight is just all different kinds of levels of special. And as I said, The Pull Inn happened earlier on too and it’s so easy to forget that. A gig of that magnitude, almost wiped from our memories just an hour or so later by even more epic events. What an amazing turnaround, and what a rollercoaster night.

After saying a triumphant goodbye to The Corner House as we’re clapped and cheered out the door for the second time tonight – a night which also included a bar telling us to stop, just to remind you of that – we drive a wonderfully satiated Tommy back home, receiving his thanks for a memorable night, and seeing him off with warm hugs as he joyfully walks home. I really think this is one night that will stay with him. It certainly will with us.

Day 50
Monday October 17

After Dalkey and Sallynoggin, we return to Dublin tonight to tackle Maynooth. Or so we think. It looks like a largish town, but we discover it mainly has just four or five bars on the edge and that’s it. And none of them are suitable for us so we bypass our first target and head to Leixlip.

We don’t find much there either. We see a bar with just a few people in it having a very quiet time and think, why not? We’re met by a lovely manager and I’m really sorry, I didn’t record or remember her name. She says they have bands in the back bar and we’re welcome to set up and play there and see what happens. There’s no-one in the back bar, but we’re here, the staff are up for it, so we decide to just settle in and treat it like a rehearsal, although yes, just like any other show, we really go for it. The difference being that tonight, Maja mainly sings to just me as we wander all over this vast shiny polished floor we have all to ourselves. A few people meander through on their way to the back garden, or to the toilet and back, and they give off positive vibes, but no-one stays. Now and again a member of the barstaff comes and joins us in mildly perplexed but enjoyable curiosity. We play five songs to absolutely no fanfare and declare ourselves done. Maja also says her voice can take no more, so that’s it for tonight. This is our Dublin trip for today.

Then we walk through to the other bar. We think we’re heading straight for the door and out, but no. A group of guys call us over to their table and all get their wallets out and put money in our hands. Oh wow. We have the hat handy, so in it goes. Thankyou so much. Then another table, then another until we’re comfortably over our average take for a show. This really is unbelievable. The Diary adventure has seen many surprises and unexpected twists and turns. In its own strange way, what we experience here tonight is right up there.

Day 52
Wednesday October 19

We think we’re going to hustle Tullamore tonight but when we get there we realise we’ve made the rookie mistake of forgetting to check if there’s any live soccer on. Oh well. Back home and back into recording. Just as we get started, the phone rings and it’s Peadars in Moate, asking if we could play tonight. Well, yes, we could. We stop the session there and then and head on out.

This turns into just the most amazing gig. As soon as we walk in the door a cheer goes up from around the bar. There are 15 to 20 people in here, a lot of people in such a small space. We play five songs, then yes, a big encore call. Then another encore call, which we also play, then we say thankyou very much, and goodnight. But no. The calls keep going up and up. We don’t do third encores. But tonight is going to be different. As we’re insistently packing up, one of the regulars grabs the bar keys and locks the front door. ‘You’re going nowhere now,’ he says triumphantly. We’ve been kidnapped. The ransom: More of our own original songs. Is he joking? Is he serious? We take it as a good natured prank, but hey, if someone wants it that much, you really might as well just give it to them anyway. So yes. Of course we do. Encore? Not really. Let’s just carry on. We must do OK because they do actually let us out. Thanks guys.

Day 53
Thursday October 20

If you’ve been with us from the beginning, you’ll know that we’ve been pretty much living on Maja’s savings and other associated finances for some time and always knew it wouldn’t last forever. Way way back when, when Maja first floated the idea that we really go for this and just keep going as long as we could in a full time capacity, she said that if and when the time came, she would get another job in the same industry and we would just keep on going. Well now that time has come. With that, we start to discuss what this actually means. A big part of us wants to stay in Ireland and keep this as a base and travel and tour around like we have been doing. A lot of the kind of work Maja does can be remote working, often fully remote working and we have discussed this kind of thing a lot and at times kind assumed this was what would happen if and when the time came. But why not open up to possibilities as well? We’re only considering major cities where we could really make The Diaries work, but those cities kinda go hand in hand with tech jobs as well so the synergy really is there. The big ones pop out effortlessly. London, New York, Tokyo, Clara. Why not? If it’s remote, the opportunities then become where we make them. So London, New York, Tokyo or Clara it is with our preferences half leaning towards just staying here and branching out, and half towards London because, well, I have a history there. And Maja really fancies fully experiencing real London rather than the lockdown London she saw the first time around. We did get our week or so there back in December, but even then, it was clear things hadn’t yet got properly swinging again.

So yeah. It’s that time.

But first, we hustle.

Athlone.

First stop is Flannerys where we had a really cool little impromptu session one day. The lady behind the bar is reticent, saying there’s no point and that no-one will give anything here, but she’s also resignedly like, if you want to try, go for it.

So we do. It quickly becomes clear that some of the tables just want to talk, so after a fast start, we reread the room and just go for a gentle set. This produces one of the biggest hat takes we’ve ever had.

Now we head to Careys where we meet a rowdy English crowd just coming out. When they hear we’re going to try to play, a cheer raises up and they walk in with us. The bar lady looks up, sees what we’ve brought in, and is well up for it when we say what we want to do, especially seeing we’ve just brought a whole crowd of at least 10 people back into her bar. Then the mood changes as our new ‘friends’ ask what we’re going to do. As soon as we proudly say it’s all our own songs the mood changes. They are not interested. At. All. Dismayed disappointment turns to aggression. ‘You’ve got to play some Irish. You’ve got to play songs we know. Nope. We’re doing our thing and you’re going to love it. No. We’re out of here. Come on. We’re going. That’s the apparent leader of the group. A few of the ladies really want to stay and see what we have, especially when we realise we have seconds to rescue the situation and so start up with Naked. Of course we do. Two or three of the ladies love it, but I think the leader guy just doesn’t want to be seen to have backed down or changed his mind, especially when he made up that mind with zero information other than knowing what we weren’t going to do. Come on, we’re leaving. His aggression has transferred to them now and it becomes more insistent and impatient and yes, maybe even threatening, as they get more and more into us, calling the rest of the group to come and join them. The mister ain’t having it. This has become almost a challenge to his authority and he just can’t have that. He doesn’t quite grab them and pull them out, but he looks like he certainly wants to and it may well only have been a matter of time. The ladies look at us almost with apology, or maybe more, disappointment on their own part. Then, cowed like naughty children, they follow their master out into their night of fun.

As soon as they’ve gone, the atmosphere in the bar changes dramatically. It had started all cheers, giggles and smiles. Then descended into something quite dark, a new experience for us. Now it’s just quiet. Just five or six people dotted about the place quietly having a drink. We don’t really know what to do. We certainly can’t continue with the raucousness we started with in a vain attempt to win that drunken, narrow minded English crowd.

Now we meet Bridget, the manager, and Joe, the regular hanging out with her at the end of the bar, and they ask us to continue, but maybe give them something a little less lively. We start and immediately everyone turns their backs, a few people start talking at normal volume and one guy shakes his head and walks out. We get halfway through – what song it is I actually can’t remember – and I do something I’ve never done before. I stop playing mid song and say to Maja. Come on. It’s clear we’re not wanted here. Let’s go. Without acknowledging anyone, we just start to pack up.

I could not have begun to have predicted what happens next. Bridget and Joe begin the protest, saying we have to carry on. Please. The few guys in the bar join in and ask if we could. Oh. OK.

So, totally unplugged now, we stand in front of the bar and take it down a few other notches, choosing to play our most gentle versions of our most gentle songs. Breakthrough, Smile Is Going Round, Wide Blue Yonder. Each time we’re met with something like, is that really your own song? This is a new, quiet kind of wonder and what had started off very tense, then descended into just fraught, is now possibly our most chilled gig ever. Followed by another great result for the hat, which Bridget kicks off by dropping in a 20. Everyone else in the bar follows her lead. Then Bridget goes even further, asking us if we would have enough original songs for a 45 minute set. Yes, we would. So she asks if we could play a gig in her other place, The Canal Turn in Ballymahon, a couple of Sundays away on Oct 30. Yes we could. We leave this venue in a state of shock. What an absolute mash up of emotions and experiences that was.

On the way home, we decide we’re not done. We’ve always wanted to play Paddy Ryans of Horseleap, the one bar in a one bar, well, street. Is it even a village? This is the bar that doubles as a general store. Go in the left door, bar. Go in the right, store. Then the store and the bar are run by the same person who just operates from behind the counter, then bar top.

We go in and see the lovely Brida, who’s said no a few times, but has always been encouraging, saying it could work if we were to turn up on the right night. It seems tonight is the right night and she gives us the nod. It’s still a quiet enough bar though and we don’t intrude too much. We kinda get things rocking a little, but for the most part we play our songs somewhere down the middle of the road, erring on the side of gentle. It works and the whole place is totally with us the whole time.

By the time we’ve finished and are in the car home, we’re looking at our most successful hat take for a night ever. And it’s been physically the easiest gig day we’ve ever done. We can often feel wrecked after one show. As we joyfully drive home, we almost feel like we haven’t played at all. Really. Did tonight even happen?

Day 54
Friday October 21

We’re planning on going out again tonight but we really are feeling a bit tired. Also, Maja doesn’t feel great in her voice so we leave it. We don’t even hit the studio.

Day 55
Saturday October 22

Yesterday is explained as we discover Maja is sick and will be deep into next week, meaning we have knock the gigs on the head for a while. But with an actual longer show in the book now, we want to start looking at bringing back a few songs we’ve not played for a while; we’re not looking at doing a smash set for The Canal Turn, rather a well paced 45 minute show. So we intend to look at a song called Run, which got bumped from the album but which we think still deserves a live chance. Then there’s Fire and Beanie Love which we’ve not played for ages. After that, we want to get onto writing a few unfinished but promising songs. Make Me Shine kinda fits that. It’s only been played once – in Antwerp when we still didn’t yet feel fully comfortable with it. Also, it still hasn’t totally been fully learned. What we did in Antwerp was a little bit of a mess of a jam and an imitation of what it was supposed to be, so this still feels like a new, unfinished one.

Then there’s A Thousand Doors. This has been floating around for ages. It began life in Sweden, then we knocked it around in our first hotel in Hamburg, but it still didn’t quite come together. But all that considered, we have high hopes for it. Enough that it even has a place on the album. We have a whole load of other new songs coming up in various stages of development. Among them is Give Me The World, a metal type song. I’ve wanted a metal type song in our repertoire for ages and this could be it. , so this will be coming up too. With all this considered, for the first time in ages, we prepare for a week of rehearsing and writing.

Day 57
Monday October 24

Just because we feel like it, we go into The Trap and organise a gig for Tuesday November 1. So that’s two full set gigs coming up now. With Maja far from 100 per cent, we reinforce our thoughts that it’s time to step back from intense gigging and hustling and get back to developing ourselves again for a while.

The album is also going far into back burner territory as Maja has to get on with the next stage of whatever it is she’s going to do. This process starts today with the first feelers going out to say she’s back on the market, along with all the admin that goes into that. With that, the recruiter calls start coming in. Our studio is now a full on tech job hunting office.

Day 60
Thursday October 27

It’s starting to look like a remote thing might be the most viable with Maja needing a visa to go, well, anywhere really. New York, Tokyo, London. Clara would still work though. But yeah, once the possibility of those cities start to get into you, especially with their respective music scenes, most of all London, which I know very well, and more importantly, on which I’m known at least moderately well, you do start to get a bit of an itch.

Day 63
Sunday October 30

After quite an intense, non musical week, we have a gig tonight. That one Bridget asked us to do at The Canal Turn in Ballymahon. It’s a full 45 minute gig and we really wanted to have some of our new songs ready for it – Give Me The World, A Thousand Doors, Make Me Shine. And yes, Beanie Love which isn’t a new song, but which we really haven’t been playing much. But rehearsal just hasn’t happened this week. We have enough to do it though anyway. We’ll just have to go and see what happens, although it’s fair to say neither of us really feels fully ready for a full set right now. Just as we’re getting ready to leave, we get a call from a bar we’ve never played in before asking if we’re available tonight. Oh wow. That’s a development and a slight level up. The phone’s starting to ring this end now. Unfortunately – or fortunately because it’s pretty cool to be able to say it to be fair – I have to say that we’re already booked tonight, sorry.

We make the 30 minute drive to Ballymahon and expectantly enter The Canal Turn, expecting the metaphorical bunting to be laid out for us. It seems we misunderstood the date, or simply didn’t check it or nail it down enough. Bridget isn’t here, neither is anyone else really. Just four or five guys hunkered down at the bar. And the manager has no idea anyone was due to come. We say we must have made a mistake and maybe it will be sorted out during the week and he might see us next week. Let’s see how that goes. I would like to say we’re disappointed and have a dejected and extra wasted journey home but we’re really not. We didn’t feel at all ready for this one and the drive out has given us a little break and the scenery to look at of what, for us, is a lovely new town.

Day 65
Tues November 1

The Trap tonight and since Sunday we’ve managed to somewhat get a few of those new and newish songs together. So tonight will see the first outing of Give Me The World, the first confident outing of Make Me Shine, and the first outing for a while, and the first outing in here, of Beanie Love. We’re much more up for this one than we were for the show on Sunday and we’re hoping to have a good turn out, especially as we can barely leave the house without someone asking when we’re going to play again. And we can certainly barely enter The Trap without someone asking where our guitar is. So yes, we have high hopes for tonight, especially as it’s been deliberately arranged around a big live soccer game with us all set to go on as soon as it finishes. For the first time in ages, we’re all action before leaving the house as we prepare our full setup. We’re going all out for this one. Two speakers on poles. The backdrop. Mixing desk for better sound, and greater and more varied range of wireless equipment. Even a mic stand for me for when I feel like returning to the stage area to give my backing vocals a bit more thump.

We reach the doors of the bar and are all anticipation, and yes, a little bit nervous. Because, what if no-one’s here? This feels like when you have a birthday party booked and are waiting to see if anyone actually shows up. We stop, take a deep breath, and enter.

Well guess what. Nobody’s shown up. Damn. People say hi in their normally friendly way when we walk in, but apart from there’s barely a ripple. No-one seems to know we were coming. All we have is a few guys around the bar and a few others only mildly interested in the last minutes of the soccer. And there we are, standing with two trollies and wondering what to do next.

It doesn’t take long for people to realise we’re there to play and the interest levels suddenly go up a few notches. We feel like we’re intruding really, but insistence rises that we should do something now we’re here so we decide to forget about the full setup and just go for it for a little while with the one speaker. Not a full show. Three to five songs for the people who are here, then we’ll call it.

Just as we’re getting ready to start a whole bunch of other people walk in. The guys that work at our local Centra. Oh wow. They came. Antoinette, Lorca, Aoife, Karen, Caleb. Then a girl walks in with a few guys in tow and they quietly sit just off to the side. As we begin, that girl sings along with a few of our songs, clearly knowing some of they lyrics of even some of the verses. The guys with her look a little bemused, like they’re out of place, and we’ve never seen any of them before. We barely speak to any of them all night either and the girl seems a little shy, but it really seems to us like she knows who we are, I can only guess from videos she’s seen online, and has connected with us enough somewhere to want to be here tonight and has told some friends they should come too. She really looks like an actual fan. Yes, we ditch the plans to play three or four songs and bale. People have proper come out to see us. They get the full show. Then, when we’re finished, our friends from Centra want even more. We’ve already done our few encores so really shouldn’t. But, unplugged, we go and sit at their table and play a few of our more gentle songs that we don’t feel we have the opportunity to play live so much. So they get Breakthrough, Wide Blue Yonder and Insanity.

The Album Diary, day 70

Day 70

Sunday November 6

Way back at the beginning when we were trying to decide what kind of act we would actually be, we came to the idea that we would play in bars that either didn’t have regular music at all, or bars that mostly had cover music. With that, we knew we were going to be a high energy pop act, which would mean veering very directly into rock territory with an acoustic guitar while attempting to keep hold of the total pop element. The act itself would also have to be fearless and pretty much in your face with the aim being to basically overwhelm whatever room we were in. Be bigger than the room. Always be bigger than the room. With that, we felt we would be able to walk into totally indifferent, or even hostile environments and win them over with songs they immediately connected with, combined with sheer force of performance and personality. This was our vision right at the beginning months before we had a single song. If we ever told anyone of this plan, if we were lucky, we were just ridiculed. So we very quickly realised we should just not talk about and get on with doing it.

We had our first early and undeveloped thoughts about this concept in March 2021, less than four weeks after we’d first met. We moved to Ireland a couple of months later in May, then had to detour almost immediately to Sweden, where we stayed until late July, all the time still not managing to get to any kind of songwriting. Once back in Ireland from Sweden we began working out in our new Irish home studio almost every day. At first we were working just from my own back catalogue of songs. But then on August 6, we finally wrote our first song together – All Kinds Of Wonderful. Ten days later we wrote our second song, I Like You Better (When You’re Naked). Three months after that we played our first gig, then we were onto our first European Tour, starting in Berlin at the end of November. All this from a standing start in August, working from a template developed in March.

I’m recapping all this first of all because it simply seems a good time to be doing it, but second, because tonight is the night of our show at The Canal Turn. By now we’ve done a lot of shows following the exact plan we set down almost two years ago, a plan that was shot down by everyone we were forward enough to mention it to. I think I’ll also say here that by the time we were preparing for our very first show, ridicule had turned to begging, at times aggressively so. Meaning people were really strenuously, for our own good, advising us not to attempt it. ‘I’m begging you not to do this,’ was one exact line we heard. While another new friend, who would later become quite a keen supporter and admirer, was almost aggressive in his assertions that we absolutely had to put some covers in our set. I should add that that aggression was directed in our own interests as he desperately tried to sway our intentions. 

For some reason, The Canal Turn is almost the exact identikit audience and demographic I had in my own mind when I was thinking and talking of all of this. A middle aged, musically conservative audience of perfectly pleasant people, but the kind of crowd who would only react to music in a vociferous way if it had the words Caroline and Sweet in the title. All the right words, not necessarily in the right order. And tonight, we here to play at least a full half hour rather than the usual 15 to 20 minutes we play. Nine songs. An actual full-on original show to a full-on committed coverband audience. If they’ll let us get through it.

Yes, they’re sceptical at the beginning but, to be fair, ready to give us a chance. But oh man, they very quickly have no idea what’s hitting them and they are absolutely loving it. Hands in the air, fists pumping, trying to sing along, shouting out ‘More’ after every song. Oh, the whole lot. I’ve just gone and had a listen to it all to see if it actually fits my memory of it, but it does and so much more. The impromptu, made up as we went along setlist goes like this:

I Like You (Better When You’re Naked)

Six Sense Lover

Make Me Shine

Rock’n’Roll Tree

A Thousand Doors

Fire

Give Me The World

The Cat

—–

How You Rock’n’Roll

Oh, and Freefall and Beanie Love to start but we forgot to press record at the beginning so the above is what we have.

We’re not far in before they’re loudly thanking bar manager Martin for booking us. But when A Thousand Doors comes, I still feel a bit uncertain as everyone starts talking over this tender song. But that’s probably more because this is the first time tonight they’ve really had the chance to. However, as the song develops and begins to enter epic territory, it really starts to feel epic as heads turn and the clapping along with us begins. By the end it’s just huge and there’s a call for a standing ovation, matched with, ‘You’re brilliant.’

This is followed up with another slow burn – Fire. After which the place really loses it with calls of ‘Number one. Number one.’ ‘I’m Your number one fan,’ ‘I want a record deal’ It almost feels like everything we’ve been doing has been building up to this show. Yes we’ve won hard audiences over before, but this really feels like an audience that was simply not there to be won over, but has totally crossed over to the other side with us.

After this, it’s a total sprint to the end, complete with encore, which we oblige. Give Me The World is a bit rough, but fair enough, a brand new song, and I wasn’t sure about that as we began, but yes, they’re totally up for this one too. Then The Cat is a tad rough to be fair but still smashes it. Then How You Rock’n’Roll sends them off happy. We kind of simultaneously pack up and talk to people, and all around the sense if of joyous disbelief joined with hugely vociferous and insistent hugs and handshakes, with calls to Martin to have us back. And indeed Martin himself is very gracious and appreciative.

As we walk out of the door, having waved at the bar one last time, the whole place erupts in applause, and this is the sound that accompanies us right to the car, where we settle into the seats in disbelieving jubilation and the relief of job totally smashed and done. Oh wow. Yes, yes, and just yes.

Yes there are a few rough spots, but tonight’s recording could almost be put up as a live album. Now, there’s an idea. I literally thought about this as I was writing that line. Then I mentioned it to Maja just as I’d finished this entry. And you know what? We’re doing it. It really feels right. Tonight’s show is such a good representation of where we are at this time and what we’ve done up to now. And it’s an excellent example of reactions from audiences who have never heard us. While it may only contain ten songs, we’re going to leave every bit of audience participation on there because really, they’re the tenth track.

The video of the show isn’t the best spectacle because we really couldn’t get a good angle for the camera, but you can see the whole thing here:

The Album Diary, days 82 to 115

Day 82

Friday November 18

We decided right at the beginning we weren’t going to write a day by day account of this next thing, but now it’s concluded, we can at least finally let you in on what’s been going on. October 20 was when we realised we would have to move onto the next stage of this thing, something we’d known was possible right from the start. That next stage being Maja re-entering the workforce so that we can keep this thing going. We wrote about this way back in the summer of 2021, revealing that Maja was and is a cloud engineer, a very highly sought and well paid profession. Well now she’s returning to allow us the possibility of continuing. But really, before things got real a few weeks ago, she had already said to me casually, one day while swimming in the local pool, ‘Would you like to move somewhere like New York or London? Maybe even Tokyo?’ We actually started mulling over the possibilities there and then while swimming laps. It’s actually happening now. After a long four week period of applications and interviews, today an offer was accepted and agreed and the job starts in London in January. So that’s it. We’re moving to London. Maybe even as early as next month.

The past few weeks, everything has been on hold as Maja has been preparing and attending online interviews. Now that process is complete, we now start looking for an apartment in London and getting this whole place packed up. How all this is going to happen, we have no idea just yet, but it is going to happen.

Everything on hold means all album production ceased, along with hustling gigs pretty much. This was why we were kind of relieved actually when the we arrived at The Canal Turn for the first time and discovered the mix up of dates. We’d managed no rehearsal and weren’t entirely sure how on our game we would have been. Having it replaced for the following week allowed us to get on it again and ensure we were able to put in the performance we did.

So we know we’re going to London, but for a while there were very real possibilities of a few other cities. Tokyo dropped in for a while, as did Amsterdam. New York was never a fully viability due to Visa requirements. But there was also the possibility of a remote position, meaning we could have stayed right where we were, although if that had happened, sometime next year we still would have probably aimed at a London move. 

London’s a huge place, so you might be wondering just where specifically. Shoreditch. We’d already decided that if we were to move to London we wanted to live in Shoreditch, one of my absolute favourite areas of the city. Along with Camden, it’s the creative capital of the capital. Full of one-off shops and the coolest venues with so many of them open to original music. And, being so central and well served by all kinds of public transport, it’s very well connected to all the other music scenes around the city. Plenty of other cities, and indeed London areas, may have their own cases to make, but I would say that Shoreditch is the best place in London to be if you’re a songwriting act. Which would make it the best place in the UK. And if London is the best place in the world to be doing this, which many – myself included – believe it is, then that makes Shoreditch the single best place in the world for The Diaries to be.

It’s totally central and somewhere I actually fantastised about living in from time to time when I used to live in London. It seemed an unattainable location actually. So Maja was looking at maybe working somewhere in Soho, or maybe the financial district, which is just down the road from Shoreditch, with Soho being a little further away but still a perfectly comfortable commute. 

While going through the process, one day Maja began musing about where the UK’s equivalent of Silicon Valley could be. I had no idea. I’d never had cause to think about it really.

So we looked into it. Do you want to guess where we discovered it was? I’m sure you have. Yep. Shoreditch. The roundabout next to Old Street tube station, which I’ve always looked upon with such fascination, even has a nickname. Silicon Roundabout.

What was that I was saying about Shoreditch being the best place in the world for The Diaries to be? Tomorrow the apartment hunt begins. And right now you really can guess where we’re looking to move to.

Day 85

Monday November 21

It’s starting. The plan is to drive to London with a full car load. The rest of everything we have will be put in storage in Dublin, and then a removal company/person will take that to the apartment in London that we don’t have yet.

But first we have to make sure that what we’re planning on taking with us can actually go with us. So today the car is brought into our back garden, then we identify the essentials and pack the car to make sure it does actually all fit. It does. We’re on. Right. Time to get boxes and get this whole house packed up and ready to go.

Day 90

Saturday November 26

Maja realises that, with Christmas happening with my family, if she wants to visit her family in any near future, it has to be now. Within minutes of that, she’s booked a flight leaving this Monday and returning Sunday December 11.

Day 92

Monday November 28

So that’s Maja off to Sweden and me on my own for a little while. 

I think I’m going to get into quite a lot of things, including songwriting, some album recording – mostly drums and bass – and Diary catchup. But the day after she leaves I get sick and have basically have the first week wiped out. Once recovered, I get into songwriting, completing Without A Gloria, Talk About The Weather, and The Beanie Shop. We also have a song in this batch called Moving To London which I get a good look at as well. 

And yes, during this time I do what I can about packing and preparing, but there is an awful lot we will have to do and decide together. And of course, I have no idea what Maja wants to do with her own stuff with regards to taking, storing or taking to our favourite charity shop. So I can’t do anything about that at all. But I’m satisfied that, by the time she gets back, I’ve done everything I can during her Sweden break.

Oh, and that charity shop. For local knowledge, it’s across the road from the Mace petrol station and has become one of our favourite places in Clara. Run by volunteers, including Lisa who becomes a very good friend of ours, it’s a wonderful shop and something of a drop-in place for a chat and a cup of tea. I want to name a few more names, but I know I’ll miss people out so I’ll leave it at Lisa who becomes our best friend there and a big supporter of The Diaries.

Day 105

Sunday December 11

Maja’s back from Sweden which means if we start tomorrow, we have exactly one week and a day to pack everything we have and leave the place as we found it when we first moved in. This will be a big planning job as we decide what we want to take, what to throw away, and what to give to the charity shop.

Taking our stuff to the storage unit in Dublin will ultimately take four trips, and we end up taking three carloads to the nearby rubbish/recycling centre. The amount of stuff you accumulate in a little over a year and a half. And we consider ourselves streamlined and definitely not hoarders. 

Day 109

Thursday Dec 15

A visit to Tullamore just because, and we take ourselves to our favourite coffee shop, The Riverside Cafe. We first came here in our first two weeks in Clara just as such places were allowed to open, but only for outside consumption. We heard the story then of how it was a fledgling business with a big heart. Well, it’s still here and we’ve continued to come from time to time. We have a chat with the manager today and tell him we’re leaving Ireland next week so this will probably be our last visit. We give him a card, and with that, he goes behind the counter and comes back with a present for us. A wonderful bag of Coffee Perfection coffee bags. This is a family run coffee company from County Meath. What a lovely gift and something to remember this fantastic cafe by. Thankyou Tullamore. We’ve loved our regular visits here. But I’m not best pleased at myself for neglecting to get the manager’s name. But thankyou to you too.

Day 110

Friday December 16

The ladies at the charity shop are well aware of our shows having seen various videos. They’ve often asked when we were going to play locally, but as you know, we generally do the Now Hustle so have no idea when or where until the day or even the minute. So we promised to do a show for them one day. It’s not been so easy to get calendars to match, we understand, so today as we’re out and about we decide to just go in and offer to play for them today. We go in and it’s Lisa and her friend Rosie looking after the shop. Of course we want to play for everyone and anyone, but we really wanted Lisa to get the chance to see us, and now here we are. She’s delighted to see us and to that we’ve said we’re going to play but the shop has to close in the next hour or so and then that’s it for Christmas. Oh wow. We’ve only just caught them in the shop’s very last hour of the year. OK. We’re on it. We make a quick dash home to get the guitar and return as soon as we can. Now it’s on and among all the racks of clothes and toys and general charity shop bric a brac we do our thing with Lisa and Rosie joyfully bouncing along. It really is one of the most fun songs we’ve ever done. Just the four of us in here, but vibe is almost blowing through the walls. We play four or five songs before finishing with Beanie Love. This has been a very impromptu set which we’ve made up as we’ve gone along and this particular song has been last by accident really. But they go crazy for it, telling us that’s our show stopper, encore, show closer, everything. Wow. OK. You kind of have a feeling a song is good, and have faith in what you do, or at least try to, and we’ve felt good about this song from the beginning. But to get such emphatic feedback is amazing. We’ve given them I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) How You Rock’n’Roll, Six Sense Lover, Rock’n’Roll Tree and The Cat, and they’ve chosen Beanie Love as their favourite out of the lot of them. You really know nothing about your own songs most of the time. You often find out where the best ones are by listening to your audience. 

Thankyou very much ladies. We really have got just under the wire here as they are getting called away and have to close the shop, almost as the last notes of Beanie Love are still reverberating around these four small walls. 

Tears are shed as we hug and say our goodbyes before walking back home down the road, ecstatic at the show we’ve just done and the sheer fact we were able to do it. We truly didn’t want to leave Clara without Lisa having seen us play. We also can’t believe the sheer last minuteness of it. And this show might only have been for just two people in an empty charity shop, but oh it felt epic.

Of course, anyone who’s ever moved house knows that however long you think anything is going to take, or however much you think you have to do, multiply it by five or maybe even ten and you might, just might, be half way there in your estimation. And oh is there a lot a lot a lot to do. Just overwhelming at times, but keep going. One foot in front of the other. One car load after another. One box packed after another. It’s pretty much the same with recording actually. As I’ve often said, approach any day in a studio and you’re like, oh today we’re going to get that, that and that done, and maybe some of that and that. If you’re lucky, you might be there till midnight and get half of one of the thats done. So it is here. Which means we feel like we have hardly any time to do anything at all outside of what we’re doing to get all this done in the first place. Which explains why the charity shop show, that was so important to us, only just made it under the tightest of wires. And why we feel up against it to even think about playing a last goodbye show in The Trap. But it would just be wrong not to. And of course we want to hang out in there a little and have a drink or two with so many of the people who’ve been with us since the beginning, were at our very first show, and have become friends and simply part of our community, or rather, we’ve become, or at least tried to become, part of theirs.

With that in mind, we head off into The Trap for a Friday night out. During general mingling we chat to Jimmy, one of the bosses. Somehow he hasn’t heard that we’re leaving but we’re actually glad about that as it means we’ve told him ourselves. But it’s still mad to see the way his face falls when we do so. ‘You’re going to have to play here before you go,’ is his immediate reaction. Fantastic. Exactly what we were thinking. This is also a good place in which to tell you what our actual leaving plans are. 

We have an 8:30am ferry on Wednesday from Dublin which means we want to be on the road by 5:30am at the latest to absolutely ensure we arrive by 7:30. We’re banking on having a few last minute things to do that morning, maybe bits and pieces we can’t do until the last minute, including a few checklist things our landlord has asked us to be in place to ensure easy takeover. So we’re planning on being up by 4am to give ourselves an hour and a half in the ‘morning.’ Which essentially means that although we’re technically leaving Wednesday morning, we’re really leaving very late Tuesday night. All this is to say that a night out Tuesday is out of the question. And with The Trap having music Saturday and Sunday, the only available night to have a last show is Monday. And that’s exactly what we settle on.

Apart from telling Jimmy, a few other people hear the news for the first time tonight, while there are other people who already know and come to say hello, have a chat and generally say nice things about what we’ve achieved in our time here, from playing our very first show in The Trap to the two European tours to our continuing travels playing around Ireland. All from scratch and all from our base in our house in Clara which we used to do exactly all of this.

The overriding sentiment is that we’ve made a big impact on the local community, that we really have been taken into the hearts of so many people here, and that we will very much be missed and people are very sorry to see us go. One person tells us that we actually can’t leave, going on to almost asking us not to. Then, for us, there’s a huge moment when someone else tells us we enhanced Clara. Oh damn. Enhanced Clara. I can’t think of a bigger compliment and that one just about floors us.

And there are a couple of friends who’ve begun their own songwriting efforts which we like to think we’ve inspired. During the evening, they ask if we would mind if they covered I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Oh wow. Lads, of course not. Go for it. It’s an honour to be asked and we look forward to hearing it.

When we first arrived and first started thinking about playing live, we discussed at some length where we would play and if we would even think about playing locally. The thought being we might want to keep this kind of to ourselves as far as the local community was concerned, and maybe there was a little feeling that if we didn’t go down well, then that could impact our experience here. Can you imagine getting to know people, making friends and then getting booed out of your first show? I really did feel quite trepidatious going into that first one. Indeed, one guy said if we weren’t good he’d throw things at us – said in jest, but really… And another person, who we’d come to get on very well with said they couldn’t hang around after we started. That person stayed till the end, said I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) was the best song she’d heard in years, and became a firm supporter of ours. So yeah, I really felt there was a hell of a lot riding on that first show. I don’t think Maja felt quite the same and indeed, she really didn’t have any nerves about it at all which blew me away quite frankly. And as that particular evening went on, it became clear these were not words of bravado, but a statement of matter of fact. Conversely, in our first conversations about whether or not we should play around here, right down to where we would like our first show to be, there was an underlying arrogance, or at least confidence. No. Arrogance. And it was me who voiced it. I thought it was important our first show was in Clara and that people here knew what we were doing and that we would be seen to do it. I had the idea that Clara could develop a sense of ownership of us. That this was where we started. That, in some kind of sense, the people of Clara could grow to feel some kind of ownership of us, or at least feel a part of our story, and if that was to be the case, there was an importance that this had to be where it all began. Not just from living, writing and working here, but also to be the place where we first ventured out into the (spot)light. And so we did. And here we are, last show in Ireland booked, in the same place we played our first show anywhere. The Trap. As we hear the thoughts of people who have become our friends and supporters, people who we are going to play for again on Monday, our last night out in Ireland, at least for now, it’s clear that everything we said to ourselves at the beginning, with breathtaking arrogance to be fair, has come to be. This is the birthplace of The Diaries and we have also very much made it our home. There can be no doubt. Clara totally has a place in our hearts and we know we will miss it very much.

Day 113

Monday December 19

The night of our last show in Ireland – for now. And as you know, it’s the same venue we played our very first show in just over a year ago on November 5 – The Trap. You can read about that particular show in The Tour Diaries Prologue.

Just as the contrast between where we are now and where were were that day is enormous, so it is between tonight’s show and the last one we played. In The Canal Turn, we were facing a sceptical crowd that we really had to win over. Here, they are on our side as soon as we enter. If anything, they’ve been waiting for us and a cheer goes up as we walk in the door. They even know a lot of our songs. This is a home fixture. But more. A goodbye home fixture.

It’s possible we’ve never had so much expectation. Laksmi, Berlin maybe. And the return to Peadars in Moate was also a bit special to be fair. But The Trap. That’s different altogether. You might think that would allow us to relax a little. Of course it’s nice to walk into a place and people know what you’re about, but relax? Not at all. You simply can’t be complacent. If anything, you have to go for a show like this even more; unlike any other show we’ve ever done, tonight I’m feeling the tingle of responsibility that I don’t want to let down. More than anywhere else right now, this is our crowd and we really truly have to give them what they came for. Oh, that’s another thing. As you know by now, our general model is to essentially ambush. There’s none of that tonight. This time, people are ready and waiting for us. And they expect. We have to deliver.

We really wanted to get into The Trap at some point in the weekend for our last weekend in Clara and we did that on Friday. As for the rest of the weekend, we were just so busy packing and organising with the clock very much ticking against us. Oh, there’s been so so much to do and there still is. It just feels never ending. But tonight we get a bit of a respite as we head across to The Trap again to play our last show at what will definitively be our last night in the bar.

I wrote a blow by blow account of our last show at The Canal Turn so I won’t recount a full show again, but what I will say is that the turnout does us proud and that we hear so many comments that are so heartfelt that I really don’t want to put them in here. But what comes across from everyone we talk to tonight, before and after the show, is how much they love that we just put ourselves out there. That we include the audience. That we don’t just stay on the stage, that we move around the venue and take the show to the people. We also hear that our presence has been positively felt about the place, in here and out and about. And of course it’s great to see that the songs do indeed hit home as we play them in here for the last time. And yes, when it comes to the two song encore, we do indeed finish with I Like You (Better When You’re Naked), a song who’s very popularity, it feels, was born in The Trap.

As we come to our last few songs, off duty bar staff Adam and Amy, who’ve wonderfully come out tonight to see us, approach us in a rare moment when we’re both on stage, and present us with two amazing bouquets of roses. At this, the whole place erupts in a spontaneous applause which becomes the longest sustained applause we’ve ever had. I can’t speak for Maja here, but I feel, in that moment, that they’re not just clapping tonight’s performance. They’re clapping for us, The Diaries, for everything we’ve done to get to this point. And maybe, clapping for all of the performances we’ve done in here with The Trap being the place we’ve played more than any other; tonight is our seventh live appearance in here. And it’s the first place we ever played, which by extension makes it the first place we played in Ireland, and it now becomes our last show in Ireland. 

With that – maybe it’s people seeing their last chance – as we finish, there’s a clamour for autographs on our very own Diaries beer mats. So much so that, as Maja sets herself up at a table to be able to write on them, a queue forms. An actual queue. For autographs of The Diaries. 

It should be mentioned, mostly as a silent thankyou to the people who came out for us tonight, that we don’t do the hat for this show. But bar owner Angela is totally on hand for us with free drinks, and our friends here help keep us topped up after that as well so that’s still a result.

During this aftershow glow, people insist we return someday, and we fully and truly agree. Now we have a wonderful wonderful post show mingle around so many of these people who have become our friends. However, there are still some we’ve been on nodding acquaintance with for a while but have never really spoken to properly. That changes tonight in quite a few cases.

When the time comes for us to leave, we do so with the applause of Clara ringing in our ears and accompanying us out into the night. 

Oh, we are going to miss this place. 

We moved here in May 2021 and so have been here just over a year and a half. It has course been covered in The Diaries, but it’s worth mentioning again here that the total catalyst for the move was Brexit; once me and Maja had become an item and saw a future for ourselves, we knew that Maja couldn’t stay and work in the UK and I couldn’t move to Europe and live and work there. So we needed a solution. That’s where Ireland came in; it was in the EU so Maja was OK there, and owing to its border with the UK’s Northern Ireland, a Common Travel Area was created meaning I was OK there as well. Once that was decided, we then further decided to make the most of the move, seeing it as an opportunity to find a detached house – in a countryside area we thought, because this would make it the most cost effective solution. The idea then was to use that house as a base to write songs and have a place to rehearse and record any time day or night, a concept that would have been financially far out of reach in London.

As you know, that’s exactly what we did. We had different ideas of what would happen next, one of the possibilities being to keep the house in Clara and use it as a base to return from European and world touring. Then the London move and opportunity came up, and here we are.


Clara, and all at the Trap, thankyou very much. 

Day 114

Tuesday December 20

Our last day in Ireland. And our last day of packing, organising and cleaning. It feels like we’ve been doing this forever and there’s still a ridiculous amount to do. It doesn’t feel like we can get it all done today, but we have to. Tonight we leave. Well, actually tomorrow, but as we’ve been saying and thinking, we’re going to be up at 4am, planning to actually leave by 5:30am so that really counts as Tuesday night.

After last night’s amazingness, I’m up at 8am and on it straight away, although yes, there is a mid morning break and slump before we’re up and properly at it again. The flowers we received from Adam and Amy last night are on proud display and we even manage to get a few photos of the flowers in different parts of the house.

When we started this process, we really thought we’d get more or less finished with a day or two then left to chill. Oh how funny that is. We haven’t even managed a buffer day. Instead, we’ve feel up against deadline the whole time and we don’t even get a respite from that today as the job just goes on and on and on. Finally finally finally, as 2am rolls round, two hours before we have to get up again, we declare ourselves totally fully, truly done. We even have the car packed. Now there are just those very last minute of last minute things to do that can’t be done until we’re ready to go. Which is why we’re up an hour and a half before we have to leave. Which means we get to go to bed for a full two hours. A little more than a nap. I don’t even manage that much. I don’t sleep at all. Then the alarm goes at 4am and we’re up and on it again. Time to finish up and leave. This is it.

Day 115

Wednesday December 21

It actually feels really unsettling when we truly finish everything. By 5:30am as planned, Maja’s waiting in the car, which is already started, and I close the door. For the first time ever we don’t have the keys to get back in again. This really is it. We’re out of the house and it’s no longer ours. We’re locked out. Time to move forwards. Time to move to London.

I walk away, get in the car, and we’re off. Goodbye Clara.

We arrive at Dublin’s ferry terminal around 7, then we’re onto the ferry at 8. We’ve been on the go for exactly 24 hours.

Although this is only a short crossing to Wales, we still booked a cabin. Mostly because Maja still has a long drive on the other side and we kinda had a feeling that the day before this would be a big one. Here we are and with the 2am finish, it’s all played out even more extreme than expected. We really need to sleep now and we need to sleep properly. Oh wow, the bed feels incredible and the sleep is instant and truly glorious. We then wake around 11am, not long before arriving in Wales and have a shower which feels like just the most ridiculous level of luxury. Oh wow we are now ready to be on our way again. And although it’s full on daylight and midday, we’ve really done little more than nap, so it still feels like we’re in Tuesday.

We’re expecting a drive of around five hours but our GPS takes us very much on the scenic route, during which time we suddenly find ourselves driving through the village of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. Well, it has a Co-Op, so that will do for a nice pitstop. And yes, the name of the village is on its frontage. 

Now, I always thought Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch was the longest place name in the world. I’ve just discovered it isn’t. To get the name of this place – I copied it off the net. Of course I didn’t look it up and type it, or even more ridiculous, remember it. But no. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch isn’t the longest place name in the world. That belongs to Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu. 

Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu, I’ve just discovered, and I might just have inadvertently copied and pasted this next bit, is a hill near the town of Porangahau, south of Waipukurau in southern Hawke’s Bay, New Zealand. But if no-one lives there – and no I haven’t bothered checking – that means that Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu is simply the name of a hill, while Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch is the name of an actual village where actual people actually live. So by that reasoning, could it possibly be claimed that  Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch is indeed the longest place name in the world and not Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu?

Of course I have absolutely no idea what I’m talking about.

Maja:

And neither have I. I just thought it was really fun to take a selfie in front of Co-Op in Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, day zero

Day zero

Wednesday December 21

Maja:

I can’t believe we’re almost in London. I can’t believe it. That’s the thought that keeps running through my mind as I continue to drive. The Welsh country roads soon change to the motorways of England as we continue the journey. I’m so tired it hurts, but I don’t want to stop. Every minute at a parking lot is a minute that we could spend in our new apartment. The scenery changes and we finally stop for a quick bite at a rest stop not far from London. I stumble out of the car, and for the first time since Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, I’m able to stretch my legs for a bit. Mind you, that means stumbling from the car to the restroom, trying my best to walk straight so as to not show Mark just how dizzy and exhausted I am. I end up lying down on the bench in between families of screaming children as I wait for Mark to order us dinner. The glamorous life on the road. The world is moving, and it’s not strange since I’ve been in transit for so long. It’s 7 pm by the time we get back in the car after our short break. One hour to go. Only one more hour.

The city is getting closer, is all I can think of as all the signs come by one at a time. First the warnings about the ULEZ zone and then the scenery is starting to change. I can see the city lights! ‘Mark, Mark, Mark! Look! It’s London!’. Yes, I speak like that. For real. All the time.

All of a sudden we’re in the middle of the city. Or as what I consider to be the middle of the city. It’s a place I actually recognise and know very well myself. We’ve magically ended up in Archway and we’re driving towards the best view of the city that I’ve ever seen from the car. Now we’re passing under that bridge me and Mark stood at during lockdown when we were taking a walk to pick up some plates. Can you believe that? I actually know where we are. In London. I can’t believe that. You can see the red lights giving a strong contrast to the night sky. The London night skyline. It’s stunning, and only for a moment I’m able to enjoy that view I’ve missed for years now. Or what is it, almost two years to be exact. But the moment is short and I can’t stop the car so we continue along, crossing Archway which I remember so well. I wish I had time to stop and walk around, because I’ve missed it so dearly. But we still have a long way to go. I can’t believe how much further we still have to go. Straight towards the tall buildings. I thought Archway was central! But we continue along, the roads are smaller and I have to focus as I navigate us safely to our new home. We drive by a lot of famous places I don’t know yet, and some I do. And after a while, we arrive in Shoreditch. This is so central it’s a part of the congestion charge zone, and my first reaction is how prominent the nightlife is. It feels almost scary. A bit daunting. I’ve never really lived centrally in a city before. It’s always been in the suburbs, or smaller towns. Never totally in the city. In the Capital of Europe, London. One of the coolest cities of the world, and now I am in the coolest part of that city. I can’t believe it. 

I navigate to a little side street, park the car temporarily and leave Mark there as I run to a place to collect our keys from the guardian. I’m a bit confused as to where that guardian is, I have to call him up and ask because even though I’m outside the building I can’t figure out which building. He comes out and greets me outside and I follow him into the reception of some place that just looks strange. It looks like a building site, but maybe more like how I imagine a movie set. It’s temporary but seems in use and a lot of like fabric hanging making the corridors look strange to me. But I don’t get to go further inside than the entryway where I’m handed the keys and then sign some papers. I try to ask some questions but the guardian doesn’t know anything so I just leave. I’ve got the keys. And have had an absurd experience. I guess that’s Shoreditch for you. I go back to the car. ‘Hey Mark! We got the keys!’ Cue hugs and kisses and loud cheers, and we’re off again. The last hundred meters or so down small roads. I’m able to park the car just outside the apartment and we see we’re on the first floor. Which is something to be very grateful for when you’re moving. The road we’re on is quiet. It’s a cul de sac, so no cars around and I can’t hear the city at all. Which is amazing, for being this central. We stumble into the empty, unfurnished apartment, to check it out before we start unpacking. Can you believe we live here now? I can’t. I. Just. Can’t. 

My little tiny Toyota is filled until bursting. I can’t believe we managed to get all we got into it. Six guitars. PA system. Vinyl collection. Clothes. Computers. And a few things we forgot to put into storage in Dublin; The seat part of the drumchair for example. And yesterday as Mark was cleaning the house, I was putting the seats apart to press clothes in under them. You know the space under the seats. That’s a perfect place for our spice collection. The spare tire. Oh, let’s fill that area with guitar leads. Great! 

And now in the matter of minutes we take each and every item out and dump everything on the floor. Thank you car, you did great once again. 

As we lock the car and go back into the apartment there’s only one thing left to do. We blow up the airbed, put the sheets and duvet on and fall into it. I can’t believe it. 

‘Mark. We made it.’

And we fall fast asleep until morning. 

The London Diary: Shoreditch, days one to 73

Day one

Thursday December 22

Mark:

Our original plan was to go away for Christmas today, but we need this day here more than we had begun to anticipate. There’s loads of general apartment organising and bits of admin stuff, and then we’ew off out to buy a few little bits and pieces for the apartment. For this we leave our area and take a drive to Stratford, a town out in east London which has a shopping centre. Then late afternoon we manage a little walk around our new area, one of the very coolest in London. The bars and potential venues seem almost endless, especially given our track record for playing in places not generally considered live or original music venues. Go to the end of our very short street and turn right and there’s a bar 20 metres that way and another one across the road from that. Turn left and we’ve got one within about 70 metres and a whole bunch not far from that one. And this is the backstreets. The whole place is filled with tiny roads, off of which branch more tiny roads with more hidden bars. And this being Shoreditch, there’s bound to be so many places not even visible from the street. This is going to be very interesting area to get to know.

We also discover that there are loads of temporary food stalls set up right across the road from us. Falafel stand, kebab stand, and three or four others. These, we learn, are set up and taken down every lunchtime to cater for the huge amount of office staff around here. We will also later learn that there are a few more streets round Shoreditch where this happens, including two streets, both very close, that are totally taken up both sides by such stands. It’s like living in the food section of a theme park.

Having looked round our local area a little, we take a walk to Covent Garden to visit Krisoff, manager of the White Hart. He’s stunned when we walk in. The whole double take thing. A lovely drink or two with him where we recount a few recent adventures and fill him in on where we’re living now. This place, in the heart of the West End, is a walk of a little over half an hour from our new apartment.

As for where we are, it’s kind of surreal to think we live here now, especially straight after living in a tiny town in Ireland. When I was living in Kentish Town, a friend who lives in rural Wales once asked me if I could see the tall buildings from where I was. When I said yes, he said, ‘You’re central.’ Well, from where we are now, we can’t see the skyline at all. We’re right inside it. For a start, we’re right in the centre of UK’s equivalent of Silicon Valley. And again, if you’re not familiar with London geography, you probably at least know the Gherkin among a few other things. We’re about 10 minutes’ walk away from that.

Day eight

Thursday December 29 

Mark:

Lottery winners are probably more common than holders of central London parking permits. And you don’t have a permit, you would probably have to be a lottery winner to be able to afford to one. So we’re not going to do that. Instead, just like we did during our visit here last year, we drive out to zone four and find a free parking spot there. That’s about eight miles away. For those not familiar with London geography, it has eight zones, essentially arranged in rings, so zone two surrounds zone one and so on. Of course, we’re in zone one. And for parking we’ve pretty much followed the tube line from our local station and parked near one of the stations in zone four. This means that anytime we want the car, we hop on one tube, go pick the car up and use it, take it back to the same, or a similar place, then a single tube ride back home. Simple. So as long as we have the car here, we have the possibility to maybe gig in other areas of the country, or maybe areas of London or outside that aren’t so convenient for public transport.

Back home and we have another acclimatising walk round neighbourhood, also venturing a onto the edge of the financial district. Here we find a hotel that has a few lovely bars open to the public, including a roof bar. Cool, although that’s not open right now, and neither are the others, but a good discovery. Out of there and we almost immediately find a very classy place called Flight Club, a small chain company of bars. And it’s here that we have our very first pint in our new area.

Then we’re off for something slightly less classy. Having rented an unfurnished apartment, we still only have what we could fit in the car, including the air mattress so we at least have bed. But that’s it. So dinner is a takeout, which is all great, but which we eat sitting on our cold tiled kitchen floor. But even that is still kinda wonderful in its own way. We’re here.

Day nine

Friday December 30

Mark:

I thought I knew Shoreditch, having come here quite often when I was last living in London. But I really didn’t. We’re having little walks and discovering more and more and it really is a city in itself. And so many backstreets, including our own part of Shoreditch which feels like it’s more for the locals. Well, this is a busy nightlife area and I don’t think people are coming here from all over London to go and have a quiet drink in a backstreet bar. So I’m taking it that they’re mainly for us. And our neighbours. We’ll let them use them too. And the office workers. Oh, so many office workers. Come here during a weekday lunchtime and you’ll see that it truly is techtown.

Highest on the agenda today is picking up a table from the nearby catalogue shop. This is to be a narrow thing that will go along the wall in our kitchen and it comes with two matching stools. With that, we will now have our first furniture in the apartment – air mattress notwithstanding.

We’ve picked it up and I’m struggling back through the side streets carrying it home. Why oh why did I not think to bring our trolley? I have almost no vision of what’s in front of me and am just following Maja’s feet and trusting her to tell me if there’s anything bump-intoable. Then I hear, ‘Mark.’ I ignore it. Then again. Oh, maybe they are calling me? I should check. I tentatively turn round. I don’t believe it. Marco. A chef I worked with way way way back at The Oxford. He’s one of my favourite former colleagues although we haven’t kept in touch that much but I’ve seen that he has been following The Diaries. And even now, bizarrely, he sees and recognises Maja before he sees me, because he’s seen our Youtube videos. Wow. OK. So we have a hello with Marco now and of course I introduce the two of them. So he works here in this very expensive restaurant called Ozone, and we live practically at the end of the road down there. He suggests we come in for breakfast soon, and promises us a half price discount. Well yes. We will. Thankyou very much. Brilliant. We’ll see you soon. 

Now to continue and get this thing home and set up. And yes. We now have now transformed our kitchen and whole living experience. Just having a little place to hang out on and eat and have a drink and listen to music. Seriously, having this little thing has suddenly transformed the whole feel of the apartment.

We have a chat to Rick later and see if he can guess where we are. Ridiculously coincidentally, our street name does have a link to us so I tell him it is possible to guess. He comes back with, well the only street in London I know, and it’s only because we had our headquarters there, is Mark Street. I. Do. Not. Believe. It. This street is tiny with only two apartment blocks on it, one on each side. And it’s very very out of the way. And yes, Rick’s office was across the road. We can see where it was from our window. Just crazy. So that means that across one road is Maja’s office. On other side is Rick’s. And in the middle – in the apartment itself – there’s ours. Which, for now, kinda means mine.

Day 10

Saturday December 31

Mark:

We can’t believe we live here. It just keeps hitting us. Everytime we walk out there’s more and more to discover, not least just a huge variety of restaurants from so many different countries and cultures. There’s the other mad little thing that if we venture out a little way on a walk, on our way home, we’re heading right towards the London skyline, knowing we’re continuing to walk right into and among it to get home. And on our way out into the West End for New Years tonight, we discover the famous Leadenhall Market which is bang on our route 15 minutes walk from the apartment. This was used as the location for filming Diagon Alley in Harry Potter. Less than ten minutes later and we’re walking past St Paul’s Cathedral. A little further on from there and we’re in The West End. This is our New Years tonight as we plan to split our time between Kristoff’s White Hart and Tommy’s Marquis, a little further down the road just off the corner of Trafalgar Square.

We arrive at The White Hart around 8pm. After meeting him and everybody, he gives us wristbands that let us back in later on. Oh. Had no idea they were needed. The place is kind of booked out, but he’s making room for friends. Brilliant. While chatting, he says we really should play here. Gig number three offered. Brillianter. A few drinks in here and we’re off The Marquis just off Trafalgar Square. The plan is a drink or two in there, then back to Kristoff’s before midnight to take in the actual New Year. When we get to The Marquis it’s locked. But we knock on the window and Tommy comes out and is delighted to see us. He also had no idea we were in London. He tells us they have a private event tonight for locals but he’s putting our name on the list. They’ll be open in half an hour or so. Thankyou very much. So we just have a general wander around the area, also taking the opportunity to pop into a cafe for tea and cake. Then back to Tommy’s. Once there we get introduced to a lot of the bar staff I’ve not met before and basically hang out with the locals. 

It’s New Year’s Eve in central London and we have a total local bar vibe going. We enjoy this for a while then leave for Kristoff’s and the final party of the year. Just as we’re leaving, Tommy says we have to come back sometime and have a talk about playing here. Absolutely. Yes. And with that, we have London gig number four on the cards.

Back to The White Hart now and the pace has fully picked up and stays that way till countdown and some time beyond. In between, a few familiar faces come and hang out, including one or two people Maja met last time we were in London. Bouncing between these two bars, tea and cake interlude in Soho and then party with a bang in here really has been quite a fantastic way to bring in 2023. We head off about 2am, starting to think about how to get home. Well, all the roads in town are closed and there’s no public transport to be had anywhere. Despite that, so many bus stops are crammed with expectant people who will have to accept the situation at some point. We’ve already accepted it, but fortunately for us, we can just keep walking. 

Day 11

Sunday January 1

Like everyone else, really not much.

Day 12

Monday January 2

Mark:

A cool interlude today as Paul calls out of the blue. ‘Guess where I am.’ Oh alright. How long have we got? Well, he wouldn’t say that if I didn’t have a chance, so, ‘Somewhere in London.’ ‘Angel,’ he says. That’s pretty handy. That’s the next town from us, just out of the edge of Shoreditch and then a straight road to Angel. Do we want to meet up? Yeah, that works. So yeah. Me, Paul and Maja have a wonderful late morning/ early afternoon catchup starting at the hotel he’s staying at before venturing out for lunch nearby. 

As for what Paul’s doing here, he works with some of the top darts players in the world, arranging and writing PR and making sure other things go smoothly for many of the players. He’s here today for the world championship taking place in the nearby Alexandra Palace, as the guest of Dmitri Van den Bergh who will go all the way to the semi final. 

Day 13

Tuesday January 3

The last day before Maja begins work. A gentle day and a nothing night. This is all about preparation and getting the apartment together. 

Day 14

Wednesday January 4

Mark:

The first day for Maja as the job begins. 

Apart from that, the next few days and weeks will be a flurry of unpacking and apartment admin, including taking deliveries of and putting together various bits of flatpack furniture. A large wardrobe and bed in the studio, where I also have to reassemble the desk we brought with us. Then there’s the main bed, sofa and the rest. You can be spared the details. Beyond that, outside of Maja’s new office, it’s all quite pedestrian right now and will be for a little while. I also pretty much observe her hours. Going to bed and getting up at the same time, and overall just being pretty sedate and totally not rock’n’roll. But really, all this is total lifestyle commitment and dedication to create the ends for what we have to do to be able to rock’n’roll. And that, really, is total rock’n’roll.

So yeah. Maja goes to work, comes home and we relax until the next day. During those days I take delivery after delivery, including a bunch of flatpacks which I put together, and I go round town running errands. The kind of golden material Diary is made of.

But yeah, really, there isn’t going to be a great amount of The Diaries over the next few months, and not a massive amount of out on the town either with Maja in bed at a decent hour each night to start early in a demanding office, with me mostly keeping the same hours. For myself, I’ll be looking at some continuing studio time as we get that together and hopefully I can keep a few songs coming while developing some of the ideas we already have. And as I already said, there’s a lot to do to get our place into shape, at least in the first few weeks or so with all the flatpacking. But this first three months in London is about Maja settling in which means yes, getting used to the new job, but mostly completing her probation period before really thinking too much about performing. That means three months before we’ll really start to see much action for The Diaries beyond what I might get up to catching up in here, in the studio, and working on songs. I’ll fit what I can of that in between all the daily apartment admin bits and pieces and generally trying to make life as easy for Maja as possible allowing her to concentrate on getting up to speed in the office without having to worry too much about what state the apartment or dinner is in. So yeah. To put it crudely, I’m taking care of house and Maja’s taking care of the money. My job here is The Diaries. To lay the groundwork, keep the studio going, do that song thing I mentioned a moment ago, and keep myself up to speed for when we are ready to hit the stage again. And when we do reach that time, it will be me doing most of the daytime hustle to really start getting things off the ground. Maybe a few quiet nights out to connect with the area and simply get out from time to time. Some of that may or may not be written about. But really, for the next little period, we’re pretty much just playing house.

Day 15

Thursday January 5

All the stuff we left behind in storage in Ireland arrives today, courtesy of Ger O’Dwyer – get the actual name of the company. He delivers a great service and has even found some carpet type material with which he’s wrapped our keyboard. That’s above and beyond territory. Thanks Ger. 

But now what will be our living room is filled with ten large boxes and assorted odds and ends. Our apartment currently resembles a small warehouse.

Day 17

Saturday January 7

We have a bed now so we’re off the air mattress. That is a big deal.

And our first night out with friends as Matt, his girlfriend Elisa, and their friend Johannes come round to meet us in Shoreditch. This will be the first time we’ve seen Matt since arriving back in London and we begin at our local neighbourhood bar The Fox. Maja describes this as being nearer to us than The Mill was in Clara, and that bar was next to the mill it was named after – that thing in our back garden by the way.

The Fox is a nice and cosy place to meet. Perfect for a catchup and away from so much of the frantic Saturday night-ness that is going on everywhere else around here. While ordering at the bar I get chatting to a barman who introduces himself as Chris, who now becomes the first person around here who we’ve got to know the name of. I tell him we’ve just moved in down the street and he says, ‘Welcome to the neighbourhood. There are a lot of interesting people round here to meet.’ I bet there are.

From here, we venture to the edge of our backstreet area to The Griffin, another old style pub, but far far busier with a Saturday night crowd. There isn’t a table to be had as we walk in, but just as we reach the bar a table of four people get up and leave and, without breaking stride, we slip right into their vacated space. Result. Right. We’ve done the neighbourhood thing. Now to at least get into a little bit of the action. Across the road and we’re on the main street and into The Old Blue Last which is now at full volume and really warming up. We accelerate into Saturday night here, then when we’re done, we wander down the road to find a burger and beer bar to finish off. Out of here and it’s time to say goodnight. And after what’s felt like a full night out on the town, it feels quite ridiculous to negotiate our way through the still partying crowds and then simply step across the road to find quiet backstreets and then home.

Day 18

Sunday January 8

Sundays really are amazing round here. We live just off the financial Square Mile so, like that area, we have a massive weekday office population but for actual residents, the whole place is really lightly populated. So Sundays, we can walk all around our area and the whole place can feel deserted, like we have this part of London all to ourselves. Within all this, a simple walk to the shop this morning is a revelation. On my way back, I pass a guy walking down the otherwise empty street with his son. They’re singing together. But no other kind of casual street singing I’ve heard before. No. This guy is singing lines of opera in a quite astonishing voice, and the boy is repeating them back to him. Just another one of those reminders that this place really is a bit different. An inspiring outing to buy milk.

Day 19

Monday January 9

An inspiration of a totally different kind today as walk Maja to the next street to her office, then continue the walk. Within no time I’m deep in financial London early in the morning. Whatever the ills of the banking world, this place is just filled with electric and I can’t help but pick up on it all. Everyone is striding with a purpose, with an energy, with an ambition. With urgency. I’m totally disconnected from it all, yet find myself moving along in the same rhythms. A light rain adds to the immediacy of my constant motion surroundings, especially as not a single person seems to pay any attention to it, so determined are they on thoughts of the day or the next destination. This all feeds into my own vibrations and I take it in with growing exhilaration which feeds my own thoughts of the day and destinations. I round the huge, imposing, windowless building of the museum of the bank of England and head back home, to the new London nerve centre of The Diaries, my own nerve centre still wired and jangling. This feels alive.

Day 22

Thursday January 12

I finally get a good chunk of music time today and I really can’t quite believe how comfortable it feels to play bass. Not how good, as in, yay, I’m getting to play music again. I mean, how actually good. My movement is fine, dexterity, maybe fretboard knowledge and speed of improvisational thought aren’t quite so highly attuned, but I feel like I’ve hardly been away from this thing. Not sure how, but I’ll take it. I’ve barely played guitar at all in the past few months, apart from the Canal Turn, charity shop and Trap gigs and the minimal rehearsal we managed to squeeze out for them. And I’ve not touched the bass or anything at all in the studio for around three months. This getting back to it and feeling this good about playing really is a big deal because my next job on the album is checking out bass parts I’ve put on so far, tightening them up, and tightening them up with the drum parts we’ve made, and also possibly rerecording some parts that we think maybe could be better. In short, I’ve got to become a studio bass player again, and on first sight today, I’m already a good way there. My plan now is to take a few days to really properly level up my bass playing and to get back to a good understanding of what we’ve recorded and what I need to do with it.

Day 24

Saturday January 14

As we saw just after New Years, the wonderful neighbourhood of Angel is just a 20 minute walk away, straight at the end of the road once you’ve reached the edge of Shoreditch. This is where we’re headed tonight, just because we love Angel and have a few friends who work in The Camden Head bar there. But oh well. When we get to the Camden Head, no-one we recognise is on the bar or in the place, and it’s also uncomfortably full. To be fair, it is Saturday night. We try a few more bars, all with the same result until I say I know where to go in this situation. The Old Red Lion, a famous theatre pub. Maja’s never been. Well, yes, it is perfect. Just off the beaten track and with a cool atmosphere without being too ram packed, meaning we can get a table. 

Maja gets her first view of how special a place this is when a large group of girls comes in and all stand in a huddle almost in front of our table. Then one by one they begin to sing. Not chart topping hits in warbling voices. No. This is a full on theatrical musical number full of harmonies and all kinds of different types of interactive performance between them. Basically, we’re getting a section of a show right in front of us. Maja looks on wide eyed while the rest of the bar barely reacts as they continue their, er, theatrics. I take that as a sign that this is just normal goings on in here. Then they’re done, applause, but for them it was just a bit of fun as they dropped in. A few of them turn to us, especially Maja, a nod and a wink, then they’re off and disappear out to the back garden. We do not at all discover who they are, but it really wouldn’t surprise me if they’d just come straight from the stage somewhere in the West End and then performed right in front of us.

On the way down the main road out here we came across a keyboard stand someone had put out to be picked up. We checked it out and it was all in perfect order. So we decided if it was still there on our way home we’d take it. Well, here it is and we do indeed take it. So that’s how you get a keyboard stand around here. On we go and we drop off somewhere for a takeout. While in the queue, the guy behind us says, ‘Where’s your keyboard then?’ A pretty funny opening line. We tell him what we’ve just told you, then add that we’re hoping to use the keyboard we do have, on top of this, for midi drums for recording; we’re currently placing them one by one ourselves. There can often be a lot of copying involved for main rhythms, but there are also a lot of details, and the rhythms also have a lot going on, meaning we have to drop details into them as well. It can all be a painstaking process. I’m really hoping that if we can get the keyboard going and learn how to do it, this could be a much quicker and more fun way of getting our midi drums into our tracks. We don’t say all that to the guy of course, that was me taking the opportunity to explain some of our drumming system to you. We have a chat to this guy about music for a little while and he says he’s a keyboard player himself. Cool. We give him a card and we’re on our way. That could be a future connection or not, but the fact remains that we just had an involved conversation with a stranger, essentially on the street, about music and about The Diaries, and all just because we were carrying a keyboard stand we found on the street. 

And all that is as interesting as things get for our first full month back in London. The odd mildly interesting encounter, a few more bars and restaurants hit and the occasional gentle night out. And in between we drop in on our two favourite West End bars The Marquis and The White Hart once or twice.

Day 47

Monday February 6

Mark:

It’s my birthday. Did I mention Shoreditch has a Blues Kitchen? No? OK. Shoreditch has a Blues Kitchen. We’ve not been to it yet and tonight would be the perfect time to break that duck. I’ve only been here once before, that was ages ago and the place was rammed so I didn’t get to have much of a look round it. We do tonight and it really is bigger and more sprawling than the legendary Camden location we all know so well from Mark’s Diaries – if you’ve ever been there. It’s even got a vintage camper van placed inside it. An actual camper van that you can go and hang out in. Well, it’s not kitted out like a camper inside, but it’s still a pretty cool concept and a really cool semi private area out of the way of all the hustle, if you’re looking for that.

We do hang out in there for a little while, just because, then we go back out to the floor proper and find a table there. After a little while a waiter comes out bearing a birthday cake with a candle. I wonder if Maja had anything to do with that.

Day 49

Wednesday February 8

Mark:

We’re back in the Blues Kitchen again. We think it’s time we saw some live music and yep, they do that in here. We did also discover on Monday that Wednesday night was half price cocktail night, so of course we had to check that out. And the live band? Regular Blues Kitchen residents, The BKs. Featuring my old BK mate Kez on bass. As you would expect, the place is packed, so if we leave our table, we wouldn’t have one to come back to. So Kez comes over and says hello before the show. Wow. Really great to have made that connection again. Then he’s off. He has business on stage to attend to.

Day 50

Friday February 10

Another night out in the neighbourhood with Matt. No idea what bars we end up in.

Day 52

Sunday February 12

Mark:

It’s just an early Sunday evening walk out. Just a wander round the place to shake off a lazy day spent inside. Then we spot a rooftop bar. Oh, we have to go have a look. So we do. It’s in the hotel we came across in one of our first walks around here, but this time the bars are all open. So up to the roof we go for a drink in one of the most spectacular bar settings I’ve ever sat in as the illuminated skyline of London spreads itself out before us. 

Day 54

Tuesday February 14

Mark:

We have a full listen to our show at The Canal Turn from November. We’re really dropping in to see our my memory of fits reality. We remember it as being a great performance with a great reaction. Yep. We can confirm that it really is. So much so that we agree that yes, this could and should go out as a live album. It contains nine songs, but the audience and their reaction throughout really is a tenth track. And it’s just so representative of the best of the kind of shows we played during our time in Ireland. And it’s our last show, apart from our farewell show at The Trap the following month, but we didn’t manage to get a good recording of that. So, The Canal Turn it is. I think this show is even more representative than the show at The Trap anyway because it’s another time playing to people who have never heard anything from us before, but still they clap and cheer and sing along all night.

Day 56

Thursday February 16

Mark:

Late afternoon and my phone pings. Hi Mark. You playing anywhere these days? I’m in London. What? What now? This is from Bia, a great friend who I used to hang around a lot with in Cork way way way back, and then we lived together in what became the most amazing house of parties and music, right in the city centre. I stayed in that house for nearly seven years. She was and is also great friends with Amy. Bia left Cork a couple of years after we moved into that house and went to live in Brazil, where she still lives today. I haven’t seen her for almost 20 years although we have sporadically kept in touch throughout that time. But not enough to know she had plans to be in London. And now she’s turned up. Just like that. It takes me a little while to get my head around that, but then I’m like, no way. Just no way. Amazing!! I give her my number and have to say that, no there are no gigs just yet but that is deliberate. We arrange to meet tomorrow. In Shoreditch.

Day 57

Friday 17 February

Mark:

Well, here they are. Bia and her friend Cris, who speaks no English at all. The two girls have visited Portugal and are now in London for a week. It’s a huge moment when me and Maja round a corner near Old Street tube and there she is. I’m sure you can imagine the hello. Then introductions are made and we welcome them to our Shoreditch. Immediately they’re taken in by their surroundings as we venture further into the area. We head straight for a bar called The Angel where we set ourselves up at a table and just let the outpourings begin. But as for Bia, I thought there would be some mad story as to why they were here, but no. They just fancied a visit to London and Cris had never been to England, so here they are. 

Once they’ve settled and landed here, we go for a little walk around the area, which includes showing them our place and then Maja suggests we go to The Bridge Bar, the spectacular coffee shop type place which Matt introduced us to a few weeks ago. Once in there and we discover the back garden is full but we have the inside of the place to ourselves and me and Bia settle at the front by the street window while Maja and Cris get to know each other. Although they have no common language, those two have somehow really connected and they also spend a lot of their time dancing down the narrow strip of barfloor as me and Bia just hang out at our end of bar window seat. The mad thing is, there isn’t a lot of catching up or reminiscing. Of course a little, but essentially we’re just hanging out. After 20 years. Oh man it’s good to see her. And for her to see us, where we are, and to meet Maja. As we’re inside, we’re able to speak to the bar staff a little more than we would have done if we’d been out in the garden, and Rico, the owner, remembers me from a few weeks ago. We have a little bit of a chat and without me hustling, he says we should come and play here. Oh wow. Yes. I’ll return to talk to him about that when we’re ready, I tell him. I should stop doing this, but that’s prospective gig number five since we arrived and we haven’t even started looking yet. Now me and Bia get back to where we were and Maja and Cris just continue to dance it all away.

The two of them have a full London sightseeing day planned for tomorrow and will then meet other friends Bia has here, so we arrange to meet earlyish Sunday.

Day 58

Saturday 18 February

Mark:

We are not meeting earlyish Sunday. Per calls today. He lives in Alicante, Spain now but has just arrived back in London for a while. What is going on? Right. I guess we’re out tonight as well. He and his wife Weng are in Ain’t Nothin But… so we arrange to meet at a burger bar round the corner from there. We get the last table in the packed out place and Per and Weng soon come and join us and it’s the second epic hello in two days as they settle in here. Per’s in London for a while so we may manage another hang out or two, although he’ll apparently also be in Norway for a time before returning here, then making his way back to Alicante.

After we’re done here, we head off to The Marquis which is slam packed, but we find a great spot in the alcove out back. As the night goes on, people leave this alcove and aren’t replaced. So before long it looks like the place is totally full, but we have our own private party room back here. Over there, you can barely move across the floor. Back here we’ve got all the space we want. And oh yes, we use it. And as it gets later and later, HB, one of the barmen here, finishes and comes and joins us, bringing fellow staff member Jess. They slot right into our vibe as we kick it up just another notch. Anyone walking past on the street would think we have our own little private members club here, and that’s exactly what it feels like.

But yeah, during all this, any thoughts we had of being up and out anytime early tomorrow vanish. During the evening we pre-empt it and let Bia know we most likely won’t be joining them for their sightseeing walk. Instead, we’ll make new plans during the day tomorrow. 

Day 59

Sunday February 19

Mark:

Maja has the thought that when friends meet after a long time, or meet each other in different countries, once the sightseeing has been done, there’s nothing better than just hanging out in the host person’s house and just letting the evening wind along on your own terms. So that’s what we suggest. Hey guys, you want to come round ours. They do and they’re round a little after 7pm bearing wine and snacks.

This is just epic, and is all perfect company and the perfect setting for me and Maja to mark two years to the day since we met.

In the calm surroundings of our own apartment, we recount some of what we’ve done to Bia who relays it to Cris. We’ve played almost a hundred shows, done two European tours, and moved house four times, in the process changing country twice. We’ve also written an album and a whole lot more songs.

As for that album, yes it’s dragging on, but today we completed the backing tracks for the first nine songs. Now we have to begin the recording of the final three. One of which we’d already recorded, but then scrapped everything after deciding on a new arrangement. One has timing issues so has presented a few recording challenges and we only now really feel up to tackling that one. And there’s a new song which we decided to put on relatively recently. 

Oh, and as you’ve seen, only this week we decided to release a live album from one of our last shows in Ireland.

And of course, we’ve written about all of these adventures in The Diaries which, in the past few days, has passed the 300,000 word mark; for reference as to how much that is, take the Harry Potter books The Prisoner of Azkaban and The Goblet Of Fire – 953 pages combined – and we’re a few thousand words beyond that.

The evening winds on wonderfully and when the time’s right, the guitar comes out and we play a few songs for them. Bia is a true music lover and revels in this private show, as does Cris. A truly magical night. 

Day 63

Thursday February 23

Mark:

Our friends’ London visit is over on Friday and they have a few other things on their itinerary before then. Bia is of course very keen to see Amy while she’s here and we’ve already been on it with arranging that. We’ve planned to meet tonight in Covent Garden. At Kristoff’s The White Hart, and we’ll take it from there.

We do indeed do that and I’m anticipating a quiet enough bar for a table and a catchup, but when we arrive the place is already so full you can barely walk through it. So alternative plans have to be quickly made. Bia is here with Cris and two other people. Telma, Bia’s cousin who lives in London now and who I met many years ago in Cork when she was over from Brazil and the three of us hung out almost every day for a week. And Bia’s nephew Otavio is here, who arrived from Brazil today and this is his first ever time in England. It’s all so packed that Maja and Amy wait outside while I go in and find the others. They’ve still got drinks, so it’s agreed that Maja and Amy will go and find another place for us and I’ll bring the five of us to meet them there. Cool. We have a plan. Kinda. As we’re leaving, I’m very happy to be able to briefly introduce Bia to Kristoff. While this is a little meeting of two of my friends, I think it’s just really cool for Bia to meet the manager of such a busy central London pub while it’s right in the midst of full busyness.

Now onto the place the others have found and they have done so well, finding us a corner table in a seafood restaurant called Lowlander Grand Cafe that is happy to accommodate us for just drinks, although we assure them that some of us will be ordering food, which does indeed happen. But very piecemeal, which works out really well in a casual kind of way as the place bustles all around us. The restaurant staff also get to hear that this is a 20 year reunion and they really do their best to look after us. And yes, here we are. Myself, Bia and Amy. Together again for the first time in all that time. I lived with two of them at different times, although there was a period when Bia spent a lot of time at the house while Amy lived there, and of course we were all on the same Cork scene at the same time. Telma’s also part of the reunion as well, and then there’s Otavio who really can’t take it in. He’s just 19. He wasn’t even born the last time we all saw each other. The concept of him, from now, having a long friendship with someone, then saying goodbye, and then meeting them again 20 years later, just about explodes his head. It’s just about exploding all of ours to be fair and the fizz of that effervesces and emanates all around our jubilant table and beyond.

When it’s time to leave, we wind through the streets to Tottenham Court Lane station. Hardly a long distance departure point, but it might as well be for us. This is where we say goodbye to Bia and Cris and, accompanied by Amy, they’ve soon disappeared down the escalators. It’s a sad yet joyful farewell. Such an amazing week and so incredible to have been reunited again. It’s at this point you often say to friends something like, let’s not leave it so long next time. But not tonight. It’s possible we won’t leave it 20 years, but with around 6000 miles and two oceans separating us, it’s fair to say we won’t be meeting for coffee any time soon.

Day 64

Friday February 24

Oh dear. Today we both start to feel a bit sick, which develops into being laid up for the next week and a bit beyond. I guess you could say we timed that pretty well. It really wouldn’t have been fun if this had happened last week.

Day 73

Sunday March 5

Mark:

For the first time in a while we both feel good and kind of up for stuff, so we go out for a walk right into the city. First stop is the old original London now encompassing much of the financial district as we revisit the London Wall for the first time since we had one of our profile pictures taken here shortly before we left for Ireland and after a particularly memorable and eventful few days. That would the first part of The London Diary: The Last Two Weeks, and encompassing the last part of the previous Diary. This is the old Roman wall and parts of its original construction can still be seen, which go right back to 200AD. Even some of the more recent parts date back to Medieval times when some of the original Roman Wall was incorporated into what was built as the city defences of the time.

After this monument, we stay on the history trail with a visit to The Cheshire Cheese Pub on the famous old media home of Fleet Street. I’ve been wanting to show Maja this for some time, and it’s long been on my list of destinations for visiting friends. Not only does this pub date back to before the Great Fire of London of 1666, but it’s one of the few public buildings to have parts of it that survived and can still be used. This is because those parts are underground, and down there we go, traversing original narrow stone steps into what look like ancient stone cellar rooms, probably because they are ancient cellar rooms. This place winds down and down through those narrow staircases and is made up of so many little slightly darkened warrens. A truly dramatic and privileged location for a pint and, being on Fleet Street and still in much of its original carnation, an old favourite of so many of those legendary old newspaper warriors of print. Well, hopefully we keep up it’s tradition of freedom of spirit and creativity as we set ourselves up at a table in the middle of one of the larger warrens and have a discreet rehearsal, going acapella through some of our newer songs, and revising a few older ones we’ve not done for a while. What better usage of a pint or two?

Then it’s off to China Town where we wander to the fringes on Shaftesbury Avenue to find an authentic Korean barbecue restaurant – Olle Korean Barbecue.

After such a great comeback day from both being sick for a while, what better timing to book the first actual concrete date of an offer for a London show. As you know, we’re really not looking to start playing until April 4 when Maja finishes the probation with her new job. However, my friend Alex who runs the Dial Up Club, with whom I used to play in the house band, gets in touch to invite us to play his next event at the Deli Theatre. Practically next to The Gherkin. And it’s this coming Thursday. Brilliant. Just like that, we’re on.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, day 77

Day 77

Thursday March 9, 2023

A little add on to the end of the last entry of March 5.

A few years ago, as recounted in our companion piece, Mark’s Diaries, I accidentally became the house bass player with a jazz piano/vocal act which was running a kind of curated open mic called The Dial Up in Swiss Cottage in north London, not far from Kentish Town where I was living at the time. Both Jon, the pianist, and Alex, the vocalist and compere were absolutely wonderful, Jon, especially as he talked me through so many live chart reading experiences which took me right to the edge, and then sometimes quite far out, of my comfort zone. One particular experience had me feel so faint I could almost pass out immediately after the performance. Such was the breath stopping concentration required to read a four page totally original musical manuscript someone once asked us to accompany him with. This particular piece came complete with a bewildering array of navigational symbols. Oh, that was to say that while both were quite wonderful and endlessly welcoming, it was Alex in particular who I came to feel able to consider a friend and he ended up joining me as a vocalist in the jazz group I became part of. Actually, it was thanks to Alex that I was able to even contemplate agreeing to join a jazz band when I was asked. I’d originally called Alex in answer to an advert looking for a house bass player for an open mic night. Perfect, I thought. Whenever I would turn up at open mics with my bass – usually on my way home after rehearsals – someone would ask me to play with them, then I’d simply find myself staying on the stage as a whole succession of people asked if I’d stay and play with them as well. So to actually have the chance to be an open mic house bass player seemed made for me. So I called him up, he was delighted to hear from me and explained they were a piano/vocal duo specialising in jazz and the Great American Songbook and that there was a lot of on the spot chart reading involved. Oh, I said, and quickly explained this was a massive misunderstanding and I metaphorically tried to back out of the room before anyone realised I was there. Alex was having none of it and through gentle yet stubborn persuasiveness got me to agree to come along to their next show and have a go. I did, and kept going for a year or so. I can’t quite remember how long I kept it up, or why I stopped going but it became a big part of my live performing routine.

Tonight I’m back at the Dial Up Club with Alex giving it a go in central London, as I said the other day, practically in the shadow of the Gherkin.

This is in Theatre Deli, a place we are privileged to have found. It’s so hidden away it’s almost private. If you don’t know London that well, I should tell you that the City Square Mile is not very well endowed with bars or venues at all. Or at least, not many that the public can see. I’m sure all those tall buildings have got plenty of secret places going on, as well as others that are open to the public but not that widely known. This place could be filed under that second category. Me and Maja came down here a few days ago to see if we could check it out but we got to the address and all we round were office buildings. When we arrive tonight we see again that it is still just office buildings, except outside the door we were at the other day is now an A board declaring ‘Theatre Deli.’ The door is open and we go inside to find an interior office setting. A large reception area with the usual security/reception type person sitting at a desk. ‘Theatre Deli?’ we say, with that lightly hesitant question mark inflection. He directs us down the hall where we pass through some double doors to come to another large reception area with another receptionist, this time someone to guide us to the place we’re looking for. Which is down another corridor. As we start to walk down that, we can hear piano and the distinctive sounds of Alex’s wonderfully rich jazz/musical theatre voice.

And we’re in and Alex is over to us as soon as he’s finished his soundcheck. Not Jon on piano today though. Now Alex gets to meet Maja for the first time then we all sit down and wait for things to begin. The way this all works is that a special guest gets to open the show, and then play again in the middle and then at the end. Or something like that. Anyway, by the time Alex is all ready to go, the special guest isn’t as it’s some kind of group and one or two of them haven’t made it yet. So Alex asks if we wouldn’t mind starting the show. Not at all. Well, here we are and here we go. About to play for the very first time in public in London. Unfortunately, there really isn’t much of a public here to talk about. Two people who seem to have wandered in here by accident, or more likely from one of the offices upstairs and are just having quiet pints, the small part of the main act – there’s three of them here right now, and Simon, a singer/songwriter. We know each other from previous Dial Ups and we have a lovely hello after so long. Another person I’ve not seen since pre Covid days. There are still quite a lot of those around London for me. When Simon’s spot comes, we are massively impressed, especially Maja who’s seen open mics in a few cities, including Dublin, and Simon, low key as he is, is as good as anyone we’ve seen. Right up there actually. London really does just have a higher bar. Oh, apart from those guys, we of course have Alex and his pianist, and the two bar staff. No matter at all. We’ve long said that no crowd is too small and we launch ourselves into this just like we’ve launched ourselves into everything else, flying all around the bar at random and generally just surprising the hell out of everyone, not least the barstaff when they see us suddenly pop up at the bar and still playing with the stage all the way over there at the other end. We’re also doing our own little open mic thing here which we did for the first time at Sunday Slip in Berlin last summer. That is to not have any plan of what we’re going to play. Instead, we’ve written all our songs on pieces of paper which are all face down on the table, and we invite people to pick them out. In this way we can also avoid the temptation to play I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) at every opportunity. First song picked out from the ten that are there? Yep. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked).

It’s fair to say we make an impression. In fact, much more than we possibly thought. Wait for this.

Performance over and we take our applauses and Maja waits at our table while I go and get us another drink. When I return, I see the guys from the main act have now been joined by the rest of them and are all standing over the table in front of Maja and they’re all asking Maja questions. It’s about now that I discover they’re an improvisational musical theatre group called Ad Libretto – https://adlibretto.com and tonight they are Phil on piano and then Amelia, Tim, Jimmy and Neil.

I’ve heard of improv comedy, but never anything like this. They’ve decided the subject of their performance for tonight will be Maja – and The Diaries. So yes. As soon as they finish their conversation, we all get treated to Maja (And The Diaries): The Musical, complete with a reference to I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) which they’ve just heard for the first time.

Their show about us, well, Maja and a little bit of us, goes on for about twenty minutes and is just the most amazing piece of improv. Just a great show. An actual real musical with acting pieces in between the numbers. Phil on piano gently continues to play in the background, and then one of them will just burst into song, or trickle gently into one, and the others catch on and join in. It’s just magical. And to have this about yourselves, well, Maja and a little bit about ourselves, is just outrageous behaviour altogether. We now have our own London musical. Well, Maja does. We’re just in it a little bit as well. Which has led me to think. Am I now The Diary? You know you have Buddy Holly and The Crickets? And Cliff Richard and The Shadows? Are we now Maja and The Diary? Just a thought. Oh well. If so I guess I have a new name now. And you are? Diary. First name? The.

But really, I’m so happy I thought to film it because it would have been just heartbreaking to have seen something like this just disappear into the ether, only to have been seen by the few of us that were there. Even fewer than who saw us because at least we had Ad Libretto in our audience as well. By default they’ve removed themselves from the audience so it’s, well, it’s five fewer isn’t it. None more few. Is that reference too obscure? Oh, someone must. Just try reading it in Dobly. Oh alright. I’ll stop now. But seriously, what’s stopping it? And what’s behind what’s stopping it? Is my. Question. To you.

Towards the end of the show they decide they want to do a musical number based on one of ours. We invite them to pick a random piece of paper. They do, and they pick out our latest song – Without A Gloria. They do it proud, ending the show with that. Once they’ve taken their bow and ecstatic applause and cheers, Alex invites us to close the evening. How could we refuse? And we just have to play our own version of Without A Gloria now. With that, it’s so cool to play to the couple of the improv guys who didn’t see us before, and it really feels like they watch us with huge interest as they now see the thing about which they’ve just created and starred in as an improvisational musical.

Evening truly over now and everyone disappears and it’s goodbye to Alex and all wonderful new connections with the theatre guys. With that, we settle in at the bar for a little while and get talking to Aneirin and Sophie. Aneirin is one of the main guys who runs the place as a kind of co-operative theatre, and Sophie is all a part of it too, as is the girl who met us on the second reception. That’s what this place is. A bar based around a very committed theatrical community who also use this as a performance space. And all around, as we’ve been seeing tonight, it’s surrounded by large open spaces that were once offices, but are now rehearsal/workshop rooms. Fantastic. Just a fantastic discovery. Again, it seems like we’re in some kind of private London. You really do not just walk past this place and find it. You completely have to know it’s there. Now we do, we get talking to Aneirin about the possibility of us having our own show here. Yep, he’s totally up for it. We aren’t able to arrange anything right now, but he says to definitely get in touch in the next week or so and we’ll nail something down. Brilliant.

First London gig down and a lead to get another one. Oh, and we now have Maja (And The Diaries): The Musical. West End, here we come.

So here’s the musical.

And that website for the guys again

https://adlibretto.com/

The London Diary: Shoreditch, days 78 to 111

Day 78

Friday March 10, 2023

A little visit to The Old Red Lion in Angel tonight. It’s a great bar. What can I say? And the staff are starting to become just a little bit familiar to us and vice versa which I think is kinda cool.

Day 80

Sunday March 12

Just a great London walk today as we go from our eastern place all the way across central and on to St James’ Park then Hyde Park, taking in Buckingham Palace on the way. Then to take advantage of the great public transport here. As soon as we think we’ve walked about as far as we can, or want to, we just find a bus and ride it all the way back home.

Day 86

Saturday March 18

We take a walk out and Maja, mischievously, seems to have a destination and a plan in mind but she isn’t saying, although she does make sure we stop off to buy some notebooks. Our destination is Ye Grapes in Mayfair, a fantastic bar in a setting that seems totally apart from the rest of the city. Leaving the main road and coming into Mayfair is like wandering into an old style village. Another one of those times when you suddenly feel like you’re on holiday and a tourist in your own town. Yeah, London is doing that a lot to us. Once we’re sat in the generous March sun outside the bar, Maja gets the notebooks out and says, ‘We’re going to write now.’ Oh. OK. With that, we really do start. And for the next considerable while we take our time to write a whole page or lyrics each, at the same time, then when we’re both done, we read what we’ve written to each other. A quite brilliant Saturday bar activity and we complete three full pages each and yeah, we really might have some potential songs there.

We’ve timed things on our walk and been in touch with Per and Maja made sure to give us plenty of time to ourselves before we had company because she really wanted to follow through with that plan. It all connects almost perfectly as we finish our session, the sun goes in, we go in and then not too long after that we’re joined by Per and Saturday afternoon and evening just winds by comfortably on our own time.

Day 88

Monday March 20

Mark:

I told you there were discoveries to be made here. Maja calls me towards the end of the day and pulls me out with Andri, one of her colleagues. He says we’re going for a drink at a roof bar. We wonder where it could be. Well, just a few streets away from us and still very much in our immediate neighbourhood he turns a corner and declares that we’re here. A non-descript door set just a little way back with a discreet sign giving just a hint there may be a public business here. We’ve walked past here loads of times and never seen it. In we go and straight into a lift. Which rides up and opens onto a long, elegant restaurant/bar type setting. Which has large windows all the way along its right hand wall. And these windows look right across the cityscape. It’s past sundown and the lights of all the buildings form an incredible backdrop for our impromptu Monday evening.

Day 89

Tuesday March 21


Mark:

Zaid and Maja finally get to meet as we arrange a trip to his area of Clapham. It’s so great to see him and the energy’s high, taken to another level as the two of them hit it off massively and immediately as our table soon becomes a three person party. He’s been running live and original music events in London since the Britpop years and quite possibly before. How long before I’m not sure but he’s something of an institution and, hugely gregarious, known by just about everybody. To me, he seems happiest when creating a stage and a scene for the talent to come in and do their thing. 

We’re going to be all round this town tonight with Zaid as our faithful guide to his home area. But before we head off, he has something for us. With some ceremony, he produces an envelope, removes the sheet of paper contained inside then opens it up on the table before us. This is a handwritten list of contacts he has made just for us. What a fantastic gesture and what a treasure. We carefully place it in our own bag, and yes, we will most definitely be working through it. Thankyou very much. Now to keep this party going and hit the town. We take it deep.

Day 90

Wednesday March 22

Maja’s off to Sweden. With that, we come to the beginning of the end of the beginning. As soon as she gets back, the beginning will have ended and we’ll be getting on it.

Soon after arriving at the airport, Maja sends me a photograph of the large backdrop in one of the souvenir shops. It contains two street scenes. One of a famous Camden Town landmark bridge, and one from Brick Lane of Shoreditch. 

Day 97

Wednesday March 29

Maja was supposed to be away until sometime mid to late April but things have changed and she tells me she’s coming back this Tuesday, two weeks early. This also means she’ll have to return to Sweden in early May and stay there for much of that month, but it also means we’re now available to gig from Friday April 7. Finally, we’re on.

Day 101

Sunday April 2

A little Sunday day trip to the White Hart and Kristoff’s set aside some time in his busy weekend to talk to me to see what we can do about playing here. We quickly settle on Tuesday the 18th. So, first chat and first full London gig booked. 

Day 103

Tuesday April 4

I have a few, I think, semi open people to try to visit today  so I head out to see what I can make happen there. First stop is the Bridge Bar to try to meet Rico. The place is closed when I get there but I see Rico and a few people inside down at the end and give a little knock. Rico comes out and is quite generous with a smile as he ushers me in. I remind him of when he suggested we come and play here and he says yes, he remembers. Then, with a slight and dismissive air of weary  doubt and cynicism, he says, ‘Can you show me anything of you guys?’ Yeah sure. This is the first time I’ve been asked this and I do stop to think what I’m going to show as I open up our Youtube channel. This doubt and decision making all flashes through my mind quite quickly as I know I have to jump on this immediately, and I settle on our medley video, which is this one.

Almost immediately Rico’s eyes widen and his voice, as of up to now so authoritative, quietens. ‘Oh,’ he says slowly. ‘I’ve never seen anything like this.’ I’ve run my own events, and had local original band submissions as a music journalist and worked with many people in considering new acts. I’ve even dabbled in the A&R world. his reaction is far beyond anything I’ve ever seen from anybody watching or listening to any new band. I stop the video and he looks up. His eyes are now wide and infused with a whole new, yes, excitement. ‘Come, come,’ he says. ‘You have to show the other guys this.’ So he leads me down the bar to his two companions, calling out ahead of us, ‘You guys, you have to see this. Show them. Show them.’ I do and they take it in with Rico’s infectious enthusiasm. Now he really begins. ‘It looks like you’re made of music,’ he says. ‘The guitar looks like it’s part of you. And the girl. She looks and sounds fantastic. You have a good speaker and microphone, yes? Because we will really want her voice to be heard properly in here. How do you get paid? What do you want from us?’ Then I tell him we want nothing but their space and the permission to do the hat. ‘Of course, of course. What a great idea,’ he continues. ‘You must make a lot of money.’ Well, yes, we have had a few nice results. ‘I don’t doubt it.’ Now he starts to think about when to get us in, saying he wants to have a nice crowd for us. The long, narrow bar isn’t quite right so he says, ‘I would like to put you outside. In the garden at the back.’ So he suggests we wait until the weather is reliable and consistently hot, and then I should come back. This is definitely a summer thing, he says. So maybe June. Yep. Come back in June. Brilliant. Yes, I leave that place absolutely buzzing to the best reaction I’ve ever had to a hustle even though it didn’t result in a solid booking. Oh, just wait until Maja hears about this.

With the winds of that encounter blowing in my sails, my tail is most definitely up as I head for Deli Theatre where I find Aneirin behind the bar. He also remembers me and our performance with some enthusiasm and as soon as I talk bookings and what we want to do, he’s there. No problem. When do we want to do it? But then he remembers a few things they have already on and suggests a date in mid May but Maja’s away for most of that month. So we settle on June. It’s far enough away so no set date and he says these kinds of things have to go through a few other people as well, but assures me we’ll get it done. So yeah. The same as Rico, leave it a while and then come back. And again, we’re looking at June. Great. Thankyou very much. 

I’ve had two pretty good results there so I call time on the street hustle and head back home to start making calls to some of the numbers Zaid gave us the other night. One or two people aren’t in the game anymore and others aren’t answering right now, but a guy called Mike does. His event is Acoustify and it’s a series of open mics all over London. We have a brief chat and he’s warm and friendly and happy to hear from a friend of Zaid’s. He books his open mic slots so that they’re mostly organised ahead of time. What would you call that? I’ve seen this a little now and I’m not entirely sure but I do like the concept. I’ve been calling it curated open mic but even that doesn’t quite work because the open part of it still isn’t really there. It is more an extended lineup but try putting that on a poster. Anyway, he says he has an event this Sunday in Dalston, and another on Thursday in Fulham. He’s happy to put us down for both of them right now. Brilliant. Do you want me to send you something? ‘No need,’ he says. ‘You’re a friend of Zaid’s, he’s given you my number to get in touch, you’re in.’ Wow. Just like that. Fantastic. So now, when Maja gets back tonight I’ll be able to tell her, first about Rico. Oh, I have to tell her about Rico. Then yeah, that and Deli, so two solid leads for gigs in June, and then I’ll be saying we’re playing this Sunday and next Thursday. Oh, I’m sure you can imagine she already knows, but yeah, The White Hart is in the book too. And the venues for June. I think Maja’s going to be happy to come back to that. A nice little first evening back.

But…

Over in Sweden they’re having delays and not much information, and that which does come through is conflicting and confusing with the 11pm flight at one point pushed back to 1:30am. In any case, she’s going to be arriving hope sometime middle of the night. She finally gets home at 4:30am. She’s due to be back in the office at nine. Ouch.

Day 104

Wednesday April 5

We’ve both kind of been up all night and now Maja’s off to the office. For me, I’m off to my outside office as I’ve decided today is my first day out on the real hustle, visiting bars completely cold. 

As usual with these things I wait until afternoon, hitting bars after lunch has been done and they have their lull before they pick up again early evening. I’m walking around our local areas of Shoreditch and Hoxton and I cover over five kilometres, quite a bit of it in a gentle but persistent rain. In the time I manage to visit ten bars, with one that I really wanted to pitch to being closed for a private party. Out of those ten, only three have managers there and available to talk to. Two seemed mildly interested left the door open for me to return sometime, while one manager was really kind and interested personally, and watched the video, but said we most definitely were not right for his venue. Looking at it from the outside, I thought we would have been, but when he tells me of the cool chill club vibe he’s going for, I agreed that yeah, we weren’t what he was looking for. It’s the nicest kind of rejection and we part with all good wishes.

Overall, I have to say it feels a bit like an empty, dispiriting hustle day, suitably mirrored by the gently consistent rain I’ve been slowly dampening in. But I have to keep reminding myself that no managers were around so there really isn’t anything I was able to do about it. All you can do is keep knocking on those doors. And besides, of the three I did speak to, two of them are still in play. So I guess that’s OK.


Then later the phone rings and it’s someone from Clara who saw us play at The Trap. The guy’s got my number and wants to book us for a children’s party. I’m not sure how, but he had no idea we’d moved to London and sounds disappointed as he says he was really looking forward to it and now wishes us all the best. Wow. You really just have to love that.

Day 106

Thursday April 7

A walk out to Hackney today, mainly because I want to check out a farm cafe we found and had tea and cake in a few weeks ago when on a walk out this way to check out Victoria Park. Really, just because we discovered it’s the closest park to us. And farm. No, we’re not thinking the big rolling hills and the cows of our immediate Ireland surroundings – oh I do miss that just a little. No. This is a city farm. A small patch of green, all very well fenced in in between a bunch of busy roads. They have a whole bunch of farmyard animals, a load of vegetable patches and, in the middle of all this, a charming very rustic feeling cafe. And we saw they advertised live music. I walk in today to see what that’s all about. I’m keenly met by Gianluca who says it’s once a week and they look to pay a certain amount for two 45 minute sets, or something like that. I tell him we’re not that kind of act so that won’t work for us, but why don’t I tell him what we do do. Go for it. This gets him thinking and he comes back with, ‘Would it work if we put together a bill of original acts based around you guys doing something?’ They would pay the same, so we could all share it out, and meals and drinks are in the offer too. Yep. Sounds good. He adds, ‘We’ve never done anything like that here, but yeah. Let’s do it. Let’s make it happen.’ Oh wow. It looks like I’ve just opened up a new London venue possibility for original acoustic acts. Like I said, you’ve just got to hit the street and keep knocking on doors. So many people will knock you back, but eventually you will meet a Gianluca. Then once you’ve done that, knock on a whole load more until you find another one. Sing and repeat. He says he’ll try to put a bill together himself, but if I have anyone I know who could be interested, he’d appreciate it if I could send them his way. Of course. We set a provisional date of June 1.

I reach Hackney and hit a few bars, but either managers aren’t in or I decide they’re already a little too busy to hit. I also find at least one lovely venue run by lovely people which is just a bit too small. A shame. I was expecting more out of Hackney. I must be looking in the wrong places. It’s raining now anyway, and starting to get more insistent, so time to go home. Well at least I got Hackney Farm, and one result per hustle is a perfectly acceptable strike rate as far as I’m concerned. Hey, if you can go out with nothing and get back home and you’ve got a gig, that has to be cool, right? I’m doing a fast walk for a bus that I don’t quite have to run to catch but I do have to, er, hustle, when I suddenly see a large industrial fence under the bridge I’m passing through and there’s a sign on it advertising a venue somewhere on the other side of it. Oh. I ignore the bus, and the by now quite heavy rain, and take a few hesitant steps into what looks like a large, long, industrial yard next to higher up railway tracks. Oh again. I now see what it is. Stretching far into the distance are railway arches. Inside six or seven of them is a variety of bars and nightclubs. How cool is this? It’s back on. I walk along what is probably wrong to call a promenade, but what are you going to do? Searching for possibilities, I see they’re all too busy to approach right now so I keep going. When I get to the end, I discover there’s even more if I take a turn to the right and go round the back of this thing. Talk about being off the beaten track. Next to the track. Back there I find a yard type area. No other way to describe it. A few benches over the other side. And in the middle, a lorry/shipping container. Yep. One of those corrugated looking things. It’s had the top half of one side knocked out and the whole thing’s been turned into a bar. Not a bar you go in and sit down and drink in. I mean the part the people serving you stand behind. Kind of where I used to do a lot of standing behind only way cooler. Actually yes, make that properly cooler because it’s freezing right now. And raining. So it’s handy that this thing has some kind of awning covering out front. I go and say hi to the guy running it and, as I usually do, ask if he’s the manager. He is. Right. One little thing. Whenever I go into a bar, the very first person I encounter, no matter how young looking they appear to be, I ask if they’re the manager. Because you just never know. This guy isn’t at all young looking, I just thought this was as good a time as any to make that point; in about a million and a half words of writing in these Diary things – yep, that truly is about right – I’ve never made that point before.

I make my pitch and he goes into consider mode before saying, ‘We’ve never had music here before, but I don’t see why not.’ I ask if he’d like to see a little of the video I have cued and he says, ‘I’m on the phone right now.’ He is. I just hadn’t noticed. He’d very generously taken the little amount of time he was on hold to talk to me. No worries. I step back and let him get on with his call, as I can see it’s proceeding again now. I wait. And wait. And get wetter. And wetter. Yes, he does have that canopy/ awning thing but I think it would be polite to not be hovering in earshot of his phone call. I think this goes on for about 20 minutes but all the time I’m like, that’s OK, I’m about to have a chat entrepreneurial hustler to entrepreneurial hustler. A meeting of the minds between two guys who just get out there, take the knocks, and try to make things happen. He hangs up and I approach the bar again. He looks up as though he’s never seen me before. Fair enough. I had my phone out and was scrolling through stuff. ‘Oh, sorry,’ I say. I was just trying to call up my diary. I was. ‘Oh,’ he says. ‘I’m not going to be booking anything now. I’ve got your card. I’ll have a look and give you a call if I’m interested.’ Oh. Again. And that’s that. To be totally fair, in any scheme of things, he’s done nothing wrong. But I can’t help but feel just a little led on. And in this weather too. Not impressed. Maybe he’ll get back, maybe he won’t. There are plenty of other places to hustle. If I’m round these parts again, I may drop in and say hi and see where he is with it, but…You know, no buts. I don’t think I’m going to do the incessant bar chasing again. Not like I did with The Insiders where I’d hammer and hammer at the tiniest possibility of an opening. If a door’s properly left open and I really think a dialogue has opened – see Rico, I will be – then yeah. But this? Maybe it’s cos I’m soggy and getting soggier and it’s partly his fault, but yeah, I do feel led up and let down.

Day 107

Saturday April 8

We find ourselves in Kentish Town today sometime after eight as we’re getting together for a little with my friend Cris who I used to live with in the Carrol. Before that we got to know each other from the jam scene, then I played with his heavy metal band The Wild Child, including gigs in Italy, then I worked for him on his building sites when I took a hiatus from pub world as my gigging and rehearsing diary was starting to get too busy to fit around an evening job. Of course Maja knows him well too, and it’s a lovely hang.

The route is a tube to Ktown then a walk up to his place, what used to also be our place, and before that, my place. For six years. The last time we were here, we were dismayed when we went to check out The Oxford and discovered it had closed down, or at least looked like it had. It all appeared desolate, sad, and broken. This is the bar I worked at full full full time for my first year in London. Oh, it felt like I was living in the place at times. Customers just to actually jokingly ask if I did because they started to feel like I was never not there. I grew to love the place, got to know all the regulars and count some of them as friends, and continued to go there as a regular myself after leaving. So it’s a massive part of my own London fabric. We’re really keen to just swing by tonight to see if it’s still closed, or if it’s managed to open again and if so, how it’s doing.

We walk in through the side door – on Islip Street if you care to check it out – and a guy sitting at a high table facing the door smiles at us. Then he leaves his seat and walks around the table to walk towards us. It appears they take their greetings seriously round here. ‘Mark, isn’t it?’ he asks. ‘Er…yes.’ ‘Hi Mark.’ And he gives me a good solid handshake. I can’t style my way out of this one. ‘I’m really sorry. Do I know you? It looks like I should.’ ‘We met at the 100 hour jam,’ he says. ‘You were the guy who did the whole thing.’ Oh. Wow. ‘It’s Steve,’ he continues. I tell him again I’m really sorry but I don’t remember. He adds that it was quite deep in and things may well have been a bit blurry for me around then. I’ll say now that just after we leave, I have a Doh! moment when I suddenly do remember. And yes, I also remember it being significant at the time as I was told that Steve, one of the actual owners of the Blues Kitchen, was in the house and I was taken over specifically to be introduced to him. We have a little bit of a chat now and I ask him what the story is with this place now. Oh, it’s called The Parakeet now by the way. We did see that on the way in, I just forgot to tell you. Well, Steve is the new owner and it only recently opened and he says it’s going very well. It certainly is. It’s packed right now, all the way through to the end of what used to be the restaurant. And I tell him how, madly coincidentally, I used to work here. No, practically live here. Now the owners of The Blues Kitchen, the place I made my second home in London, if The Oxford was actually my first home, own this place. While we’re chatting, and while I have the opportunity, I tell him what we’re doing, give him a card, and pitch about what we’re looking to do. Would that be something he would be open to? He gives me his own card and writes someone else’s email on it. ‘Email this guy,’ he says, and gives me a card for the overall company, The Columbo Group. Apart from this new bar The Parakeet, the also owns a whole load of iconic London places including The Blues Kitchens, and Camden’s Jazz Cafe, while also running a few prestigious festivals. Now I have to ask, and I go cautious because it could come out sounding all wrong. ‘I know I can’t really use your name when contacting him because we really don’t know each other, but would he somehow know where I’m coming from or … who I am?’ That who I am sounds all wrong and I should tell you I’m very halting and hesitant when saying it. I’m really just wondering if, having been given this contact by one of the very owners of the group, there’s some way my email would be properly seen and considered. ‘Oh, don’t worry,’ says Steve. ‘He’ll know. You’re a legend within the company for what you did at the 100 hours jam. Everyone knows who you are.’ Oh wow. If there’s ever a time you want your girlfriend at your side to hear someone talking about you to you. And yes, she heard it.

Oh, and I’m assuming knowledge here. What was the 100 hours jam and what exactly did I do at it? 

What it was:

Well, it happened in June 2019 at The Blues Kitchen and was the longest non-stop open jam ever. Hundreds of musicians took part from June 9 to June 13 with the criteria being that the music on stage did not stop. So musicians would swap in and out one at a time.

What I did:

I was the only person there for the whole 100 hours and I was on stage for a total of over 24 hours. I started this thing with an unbroken awake period of 66 hours – no. No drugs at all. There are people to this day who still don’t believe it but it’s true. After that first period, I slept for six hours in a room which was specially provided for me upstairs. Immediately after that I was on stage for another two hours. I had two more sleeps before the conclusion – naps really; one of two hours and one of one hour. So for the 100 hours, I slept for a total of nine hours. And at the end I was invited on stage to play in the finale as the clock counted down to zero.

For my account of the whole thing, you can go here.

And for verification, there’s this: 

https://www.worldrecordsofmusic.com/open-jams

And there are these quite wonderful videos.

Day 108

Sunday April 9

OK, we did Dial Up. A month ago to the day. March 9. But with that only having two real punters in attendance, and possibly even only one by the time we started, I think we’re really starting today and I’m seeing this as our first real London performance, although you could validly say it was Dial Up. But in any case, this is where we’re really beginning as The Diaries are officially open for business now in a way in which we weren’t on March 9. I feel we’re more among a London crowd here tonight as well, in Copper Cats, Dalston. This, I think, is where we’re going to be tested by fire for the first time. The first time our impression of ourselves makes contact with reality in London. How will we really measure up? For myself, I’m not nervous as such, just filled with adrenaline and absolutely raring to go as we pitch ourselves in this environment of people who have seen, and continue to see, all the best up and comers. Although it might be a friendly audience of singer/songwriters and people who want to see such shows, it takes a lot to impress, especially as these people know how it’s done. I think singer/songwriters are by far the friendlier crowd as a general group, but I do still often see this as comedians performing in front of comedians. Many of them are almost famously competitive and reluctant to laugh at other people’s jokes. So yeah, I want to absolutely hit the ground running in here, smash it and overwhelm. Nervous? No. But I do feel a strange kind of pressure to prove ourselves at what I see as a different level to what we’ve ever played before. We’re in London. We’re in the real arena now. This is where it really begins.

Into the venue and we’re told who Mike is and he comes to greet us very warmly after having chatted on the phone a few times. ‘And you’re Maja,’ he says, seeing our rockstar for the first time.

After that, we settle in, enjoy the show, and wait to be called. Just as I suspected, some of the songs on display are truly fantastic, if a little more on the downbeat side. There’s a keyboard singer/songwriter who comes on and warns us to be ready for a few depressing songs, adding that he has a few about heartbreak. Not exactly what you want to be prepped for when you’re waiting to be entertained. But entertain he really does. I just wish he hadn’t made such a low hearted intro. It kind of rolled the energy out of his prospective audience. You want them to be up for you, surely, not put down by you. However, he plays and sings with such passion and power that I’m won over and I think he gets pretty much everyone else as well, although Maja says, ‘Imagine having to sing lyrics like that all the time.’ Fair enough, but there is a big market for it.

A few more acts and it’s our turn and we give Mike our wireless connections for the sound desk. Again tonight, we’re doing our thing of letting other people choose our songs from a secret pile of 10. We’re confident that every one of them will smash. Well, let’s see. The first one picked out is My Game, My Rules. Maja seizes upon the moment to introduce us and the song, saying, ‘This is my game, and this is my rules.’ It begins with a fast, heavy metal influenced guitar riff. I am so wound up to get started. Pulled taut like a catapult. Now I get to feel my release. It comes hard. Way too hard. Oh man we are fast but, caught up in the moment and filled with adrenaline and suddenly released onto the playing field after straining at leashes to get out there, I don’t feel it. What I do feel is that somehow the guitar now feels really hard to play and my rhythms just aren’t quite there. This is because I’m kind of unaware that I’m playing so fast I’m not able to be fully in control. But we’re still doing it, although Maja is really caught up in this too and, together and separately, we roam the room with domination. Many of our songs are already designed to be fast smashers, and this is one of them. To ramp it up so much is to go deep into the red zone. That’s where we are now and Maja can barely keep up. So much so that words get lost to the extent that the entire second verse ends up being a rerun of the first. By any measure, we are really making a mess of this but the train is already at full momentum rolling down the hill and there’s no way to stop it or slow it down. That’s the really weird thing sometimes. It’s often far easier to speed a song up than to slow it down. Especially when the guitarist doesn’t really feel things are going too fast, but they undoubtedly are. But somehow, it really doesn’t matter. The audience before us is swept away by the energy and electricity of our performance as we ignore and smash through all self placed obstacles and just continue to storm the thing as though everything is just as it should be. I guess that’s what two European tours and almost a hundred shows does to you. You’re just conditioned to carry on no matter what. When we finish, the reaction is loud and very enthusiastic. And maybe a little shocked. Wow. We’re in. I think we kinda got away with it. Let’s go again. The next song pulled out is Make Me Shine. Seriously? This is even more intense than My Game My Rules, and yes, once again we launch into it far too quickly, or rather, I do. Unfortunate because this song has rapid almost rap like verses. Which Maja is of course singing in a second language. Again, this song, performed as it should be, is already fast enough. Right now it is not being performed as it should be and, as with the previous song, Maja once again gets caught up in the lyrics. But once again, she gets away with it, although it must be clear we’re having some frantic levels of communication going on. But again, it fully lands and the shouts go up as we smash into the end of the song and stand there breathing heavily at the exertion this performance is demanding of us. We are playing fast and in this thinly scattered audience of about 15 people, we really are giving everything. As the next song is being picked, Mike calls out, ‘Could you perform this one with a bit more energy please?’ The laughter in the room is immediate. He is clearly enjoying himself and that is so good and encouraging to see.

Now we’re informed that our last song is to be How You RocknRoll. After the last two this feels almost tame, and I’ve finally caught myself and lead off with something at least resembling the pace of how this is supposed to be played. And, with the more assured performance we slip into this time, it really shows, especially when we come to the a capella part and I go into audience clapping mode and they completely come along with us. Yes, I think we’ve done something here. As we finish and the applause rings out, I walk across the floor to our seats and say out loud, ‘We’re in London now.’

At our table, one of the performers looks over to us with a massive smile and says, ‘That wasn’t a show, that was a workout.’ Yes, it was. When it’s all over a few performances later, someone else comes up to us and asks where we’re playing next. When we tell him it’s with Mike again, in Bishops in Fulham on Thursday, he says, ‘You guys are going to blow up there.’

Now it’s time to leave and we decide to walk home rather than get the bus like we did on the way down here. It’s a fantastic evening walk with Shoreditch at the end of this straight road. As such, the whole way, we are walking towards the bright city skyscape. In the context of what we’ve done tonight, more than any other walk towards those iconic buildings, this feels epic.

Day 111

Wednesday April 12

We’ve just had the four day Easter weekend so I think bar managers will be even more elusive this week than they usually are, so probably best to leave the hustle trail for a few days. And by the time they are out in the open again, it will be weekend preparations again, so I’ll probably be leaving the hustling alone this week.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, day 112

Day 112

Thursday April 13

Having seen us do our thing on Sunday, Mike has decided we’re the show closers tonight in Bishops in Fulham, south London. This is a really classy venue and again, he’s put together a solid lineup and we sit back and enjoy the evening until it’s our turn. As soon as we start, the crowd is with us. Totally. And not just the musicians. A whole bunch of non participating regulars are here too and they really go for it as we once again get the audience to pick out the songs we’re going to play. I think Mike really gets this and the statement it sends out. First song to prove yourselves? Pick one. Last song to really close the show strong? Pick one. The order tonight is Nobody Said, Six Sense Lover, My Game My Rules then How You RocknRoll. I’m really glad My Game My Rules came out because I really wanted to make amends on this one after the speedfest of Sunday. And this time out, Mike is really seeing us as our usual assured and solid selves. There’s no rehearsal or growing experience like live and Sunday was a bit of a shock for us and I’ve spent time since then really getting into the tempos of the songs again and holding myself back to trust them. That they don’t need to be smashed out. Like I said the other day, they’re already designed that way. They were literally written to be pulled out and smashed into difficult and even hostile environments. That was always going to be our path as, right from the beginning, we set out to play bars that were not live music venues, or at least not original live music venues. 

Out there at the tables tonight, people are banging their heads and rocking and so many are also trying to sing along. And again, none of them have ever heard these songs before. And the energy becomes cyclical as the whole synergy between us and audience fills the room. But really, it starts with us as we have to front it out at the beginning and take it to them. And I can feel it as we do. As we leave the stage and stand in the middle of the room, then loom over the tables, I can feel it. ‘Almost arms folded, ‘who the hell are these guys and what the hell are they doing?’” But bravado and front will only take you so far. It’s when you can back it up that they really come with you. And they really come with us.

And tonight we have the first audience member to have our album title written on the back of his hand in the same way we wear it when we go out live. HEJ – with a backwards J. Damn, I’ve got so used to looking at ours, that this actual ‘J’ looks backwards to me now. His name is Robert and he is all over us in the best possible way. He admits to sitting back a bit at the beginning. It starts, and he thinks, ‘These guys are going to be terrible.’ A bit into it and it’s like, ‘OK, they can play, but really?’ The cynic isn’t letting go. But then. ‘All of a sudden I realised I was singing along.’ That was when his thoughts switched and he was absolutely with us from that moment on, and now it feels like we’ve got a fan. Then he says it. ‘You guys belong on the Jools Holland Show. That’s the next thing for you.’ Now, there’s saying you’re good and you enjoyed it and there’s saying, this is really serious. Yes. We are. Robert, thankyou very much. 

Now to say goodbye after Mike’s closed the show with a really cool cover performance joined by his singer friend. As he comes out to give us a huge hug goodbye, in the process saying, ‘You guys are amazing,’ he adds, ‘Anytime you want to play, just let me know and I’ll put you down.’ Great. We’re in. No booking, no need. We just keep an eye out, pick out an event of his we like the look of and we’re on it. We really do want to keep this London open mic thing going and the two shows with Mike – set up thanks to Zaid and his list – have been the very best start we could have hoped for.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, day 116

Day 116

Sunday April 16

We decide to soundcheck at The White Hart. One of the reasons is to see if we can go through their house system because it really is a big and long venue. Secondly, we’re thinking we could use it to advertise ourselves for Tuesday. We arrange this with Kristoff and head on down there for around 6pm. First off, we discover after a while that we can’t go through the system because that requires a powered mixing desk which we don’t have. So our own stuff it is. That discovery made and we announce who we are and what we’re doing, then it’s into a few songs starting with I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). By the time we do this we have three tables in the place, so not a massive audience. Hardly any reaction. We try two more songs, both to pretty much nothing and call it a day. Oh well. We conclude we’ve caught Sunday afternoon hungover vibes and people just want to chill and aren’t at all ready for our in your face, shock and awe approach right now. Could we have gone for a quieter, more chilled set and would that have worked better. We do discuss this as we walk through central Covent Garden and down to The Marquis once we’ve packed up but we conclude that it’s hard to call in the moment but even if that had worked for that crowd, that’s not the side we wanted to show of ourselves. But having had this experience, maybe it would be better to slowly bring people in on Tuesday rather than running in and smashing it out. OK. That’s something to think about.

Into The Marquis and Tommy’s out front and in great form having just had a full on afternoon with The Pop Tarts cover duo rocking the place. The stage is all set up and the lads have just set down. Kristoff was kind enough to let us leave all our gear at his but we have brought the guitar. Tommy looks at us, points to the stage and says, ‘We close in 20 minutes but if you can set up and do something with that time, do you want to have a go?’ Oh wow yes. This time we have a warm crowd to work with, and it really is a crowd. No messing about here. It’s straight in with, yep. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Oh and it hits. It really hits. And so do we as we have no let up, keeping it right up to 11 with RocknRoll Tree then closing this mini show with The Cat. We simply tear the place apart. The reactions to the songs are simply enormous and we roam all around and totally take the place over. We even have the bar staff dancing behind the bar. Stepping up to this, we set ourselves right at the bar for a section or two and just give it to them. After the disheartening dampness of the reaction half an hour or so ago, it feels so amazing to have got right back on the horse and stormed it round the track. This is what we can do and this is what it’s really like when we play. Tommy is delighted, as are the bar staff, and Maja has now achieved one of her London ambitions. To play The Marquis. And this is all we need. Two, three or four songs. Give people a short sharp good time, throw our markers down and leave the stage, job done. And it feels perfect in here today as we head to the bar with beers courtesy of Tommy – thankyou very much – and settle down for the hang as they bring the tunes back out again for the last five minutes. Yes. This has all been timed very very well. And another drink on the house again. Again, thankyou very much.

As it settles down and things start to close, Tommy tells us we’re in no rush and we can stick around. So we do and we get talking to a guitar player called Jack who’s intrigued as to how we’ve been getting on. We tell him about our Now Hustle and his eyes widen. ‘Nobody does that,’ he says. ‘Nobody.’ Nope. And as far as we can tell, nobody ever has. And we’re probably going to do the same around here although not with the ‘Now’ element. But still, hustling bars where the original acts don’t play and just trying to crowbar them open for ourselves. And other people in the future. Who knows?

Here’s Tommy now to answer that question as he comes and joins us. We talk about w wide range of things musical and he introduces us to a few London bands he thinks we should check out, including a rocking Ska feel band called The Chase. As he does, he says to Maja as he gestures to me, ‘This fella has got a lot to answer to regarding live music in here. He got it going.’ Then, from his own memory of the time, he describes the process where I first cold called, got something of a reaction, then just kept knocking at the door every now and again. How about this week? This week? Until Tommy relented and said, OK, have a go. That was with my cover act The Insiders and we ended up playing in here every month for the next few years. And as those afternoons grew in popularity, so Tommy started introducing more and more live acts. Now he has them on all the time to the point that this is practically a live music venue. And yep. Tommy has confirmed today that I alone got the ball rolling on that.

As for what happens next for us in here, he says that of course he wants us in, especially after what we did today. He’s fully booked until August though and doesn’t have the diary with him now. And to be fair, he is in full post weekend wind down mode so I can see not really up for too much shop talk so I don’t push it. But yes, this will happen.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, day 117

Day 117

Monday April 17

I go for a local hustle round Shoreditch today which begins with a few underwhelming reactions. The most surprising and disappointing comes from a bar I thought would have been a good, soft start because it advertises a comedy night. When we see stuff like this we associate it with a bar, or a bar manager, which is proactive and open to ideas, or at least live entertainment. Maybe this person really will get back to me like they say, and I’ve just caught them a little preoccupied in their total indifference, but I leave thinking, ‘Why does this have to be so hard?’ But just carry on. Forget the last one and just keep going. We’ve had far worse rejections to be fair, but this one is just 

so benignly dispiriting. Like, what? ‘You didn’t even want to engage? Not even a little bit?’

From here I walk to Hoxton Square and a bar called The Red Dog Saloon. There, I am met by manager Adrian who definitely does engage. Then his reaction is along the lines of, free live music? For 20 minutes or so? What’s not to like? Sure. Come and do your thing. We settle on this Saturday. He even asks if we could do the following Saturday as well. If it works, of course. Damn. I can’t believe it. I’ve got us a Saturday gig in Shoreditch. And not only that, a possible repeat show. And who knows what after that? A regular Saturday in the heart of Shoreditch maybe? Why not? This really is just too cool. Once again, like we’ve experienced so many times, this hustling thing can feel like an impossible task and then it suddenly becomes the easiest job in the world. Catch the right person at the right time and it’s all, of course. Come on in. Sometimes you don’t even get to finish the pitch. You can just feel them straining to interrupt and say yes. Adrian really feels like one of those right people. He just seems to get it.

There is a brief chat before he completely opens the doos. This is where he asks a few fair enough questions including, ‘How many people do you think you can bring?’ My answer is immediate and I totally own it and stand behind it. ‘Probably no-one. But that’s not what this is about. We just want to use your bar and your customers.’ He actually nods smiles at this. A reaction I like to think means he appreciates the forthrightness of the answer. In context, and he gets this too, I’m saying we’ll give you a short free show on the back of almost a hundred gigs and two European tours of experience. This next part of the pitch has been expanded here a little for you. We’re not even massively that bothered about money in the hat anymore; we will still do it just to make the point that what we’re doing has value, and it’s nice when it comes back that we do, but anyone can decide what that value is. But from now, we’re really going to feel the bars out and bring the hat out if we feel it’s appropriate. And anyway, places and people are becoming more and more cashless. But hey, there’s always the Paypal donate button on our site. However, money or no money, these shows do have definite, solid value for us. You know that old cliche about gigs being offered for ‘exposure’, well for us it really is like that right now, at least for these gigs we’re arranging ourselves; they’re all about building our brand as they put us in front of new audiences. We also feel we’re taking our songs direct to the market. People who might hear us, and maybe even come to see us once we’re on the radio, or maybe have some sort of bigger profile. However, those people will not be seeing us in a dedicated music venue, or on some cool lineup. But they are seeing us now. To take this even a stage or two further, and to the idea we had right at the beginning, at this stage we’re often playing to people who don’t go and see live original music at all. Certainly not unknown live acts. So yeah, we really are going to completely new territories. This can be evidenced in much of the reaction we had when we first stated these intentions. Reactions that, while coming from a caring place, sometimes strayed into borderline verbally aggressive territory. ‘I am telling you. Do. Not. Do. This.’ And other people actually using the word beg. ‘I am begging you not to do this.’ Well guess what, we’ve done it almost a hundred times now. All over Europe. And now we’re doing it in London.

By the very fact that we’re playing even just a few songs in a bar, as well as being seen and heard, we have the opportunity to give out our cards and beer mats – and, when we have it, maybe sell merch with permission. We’re also able talk to new people and personally introduce The Diaries. That is the act, the website, and the very Diaries themselves. Then afterwards, if we get a person or two wanting to chat and know more, which we often do, bring it on. If we can gather up just one fan at a time along the way, that’s a fan who is now on our side and who will be out there spreading the word. That might be person to person, or person to a few people. There really is no more powerful message or advertising than that. There’s the value right there. Also, by taking ourselves out there again and again like this, we continue to socialise in a highly active and targeted way, and increase the chances of a personal meeting or introduction to a person, or people, who would like to get involved to try to take this to other levels. And it’s only three or four songs or 20 minutes or so anyway. It’s not like we’re giving a whole evening away. Meaning we don’t have to give that much of ourselves, and we’re not taking gigs away from those who play bars to pay their way.  This could all be the very definition of direct marketing.

As for that ‘how many people can you bring’ question, which Adrian was totally right to ask, we have thoughts there too. Really, at this stage of the game, it means how many mates or supportive family members do you have. Because sure, I could say 50 people, book a show and bring 50 people. Great. We’ve played to our audience and they’ve all spent money at the bar and made it worth everyone’s while. But have they really? When, in all good will and support, do you think those 50 people will come and see us again? They’ve done their thing, they’ve supported us, they’ve taken the time to see our show and, I’m sure, had a lovely enjoyable evening. Will they come out again if we get a show tomorrow? Next week? Two weeks’ time? Realistically, you’re looking at another six months before you can excite enough of your mates to make this ‘worthwhile’ again. Three if you’re lucky. But even then, will they come again the time after that? So no. That model doesn’t work to build an act either. It just gives you a one-off hit in a venue, and maybe an ego trip as you can pretend to be a rockstar to an adoring crowd for a night. One night. Good luck getting out regularly and building a name and a brand with that.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, day 118

Day 118

Tuesday April 18, 2023

You really don’t get much time to impress for the kind of gigs we’ve generally been doing so you have to grab them straight away and claim the territory as yours. Sometimes the overwhelm option is good, or sometimes you just hit a big singalong number straight away. Or sometimes you should just read the room and settle into it. Which is a lot easier said than done and, of all the options above, we’ve not always got it quite right, but this is what experience is all about. We’re in The White Hart tonight and, after Sunday when we didn’t get it quite right, we’ve taken that experience and put together a setlist that eases us into this show. So we’re starting with Freefall which has a really nice build of pace to it and has served us well as a first song quite a few times. It starts really gentle, settles into somewhere around mid pace, then goes through the gears quite steadily before a more rocking ending which prepares an audience if we think it’s now time to turn it all up. We won’t do that tonight. Yes, we start with Freefall, but we’ve decided to keep it chilled and basically not be too intrusive or dominating. We’re bringing out our play it nice set with the plan being to then really rock it up in the second half and storm it home.

We have ourselves set up and we’re ready. The place is really big and long and it’s mostly a work crowd catching up after work. We’re not going to be heard down the end anyway, so we decide to concentrate on playing to what we have up here at the back of the bar in a large enough raised area. We get started and I think it’s fair to say there’s a little bemusement among the people to suddenly find the two of us singing and playing among them. They’re kind of with it though, but the talking level remains high and we’re somewhat lost in the overall buzz. This goes on through our second song, although we can see that, around the room, some people are paying attention and really starting to get into it. But we’re still very much on the losing end of the battle and make the spontaneous decision to just enjoy it and play for ourselves. So there we are in the middle of the room just playing for each other and getting off on our own music. If no-one else is, we’re not going to let that touch us. We carry on like this for four or five more songs, generally feeling ignored, but knowing that there are pockets of people at least giving us a chance and some individuals truly starting to feel it. But it must be hard for them anyone get into it if they want to because I’m not sure how much they can really hear. But the end of each song is greeted with some applause and even the odd shout, so we are connecting somewhere out there. At the same time, we feel we really are losing the battle of noise with this room, even if we are mildly starting to win over the odd heart here and mind there. We’re just gearing up to get into the rocking part of the set and are thinking that we might just have enough people in here to take with us who can then maybe bring some other people. That’s when Kristoff looks over and gives us the signal that we have one more. Oh. Oh. That wasn’t the plan at all. We feel we were just getting warmed up, but maybe we’ve already lost on points and there’s no point carrying on. No matter. We’ve stood up to this and we haven’t backed down an inch.

We have one more. One song to attempt to maybe land one punch in a very one sided contest and go home thinking that we might have lost, but we at least got one shot in and we never went down. Nights like this are tough, but I can’t help thinking they’re tougher on Maja who, afterall, is the singer fronting this, and maybe not even able to hear herself too much on a night like this. Can’t be much fun. But she really does tough and front these things out and this has been one of the toughest. No-one’s been nasty at all, it’s just that there, well, hasn’t really been anything at all. Unless she’s been able to look up and see some of the positivity coming back that I’ve been seeing.

There really isn’t any debate about what to play next, or last. We have to. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Now we just go for it. What happens next stuns us. We haven’t even got to the hook of the chorus, or to the sentiment of the song. We’re still in the verses and playing our way into this, but what’s this? All around us people have started and joined in a spontaneous rhythmic clapping along to us. This has never happened before. It pulls in more and more people until we’re in the centre and out of nowhere in the middle of a show. In a room that feels it’s all totally there for us and there with us. It’s a long bar so down there we still haven’t quite connected, but we sure they can sense something’s happening up here. We certainly do. And we’ve stayed connected and in gear all night, so when the call comes to really go for it, don’t worry. We’re already there. Yep. Into the chorus and with the crowd already warmed up to is, they hit another level now. And we’re in. Where’ve you been guys? You took your time. But welcome. Now we feel in charge and in control. At least up here. But yes, down there too, more and more people are starting to look up. Something’s happening. Has been happening all night and they missed it. But come on. You might just catch up now.

We smash to the end of I Like You (Better When You’re Naked), and we’re done. Goodnight and thankyou. We haven’t just landed a punch. I think with that final flurry, we’ve levelled the contest, but when you come back from a goal down to equalise in the last minute, you always feel like you’ve won. And here we are. But what now? There’s no smattering of applause or odd shout out for this one. No. It’s a roar that greets us this time. A spontaneous, from the throat roar. Ladies and gentlemen, we have landed. Maja says thankyou very much and we start to pack up. Then it begins. One more tune. One more tune. And they’re clapping along to it as well. What they make of this down on the floor I have no idea. I look down at Kristoff and his face is just a picture of shocked bewilderment and, I have to say, a little joy that we have turned this round so spectacularly. He nods and mouths. OK. One more. So we do. And as I hit the first bouncing chords of The Cat, our new little pocket of fans cheer. They’re getting more. And oh we have them now. This is true turnaround territory when the fighter has been on the ropes all night and you’ve been begging the referee to stop it or for someone, please, someone, thrown the damn towel. But no towel got thrown, the referee didn’t call it and the guy didn’t go down. Instead, he got his one shot in, staggered the stunned opponent who’d had it his own way all night. Then, out of nowhere, the guy on the ropes just kept coming and was suddenly unstoppable. Punching punching, the previously unassailable opponent flailing backwards wondering where the hell this came from and powerless to stop it now all momentum had flipped the other way. And the crowd was on its feet in stunned, jubilant disbelief and cheering the supposed, defeated underdog all the way. And he’s going to go all the way. They never saw it but they have no doubt now.

Now you see what I mean. You can’t stop me. I’m a killing machine.

Yes they do. Each new chorus lands like a new punch and the cheering goes up another level. We have them and we are letting go. They know it and they love it. Maybe they were really on our side all along.

We smash out the other end of this song and it really is all over. Kristoff has already signalled that it’s late enough for live music and it has to stop now. OK. If we’d known we had a deadline we would have pulled out some of the bigger guns a little earlier. But I think we’ve made our point. The encore shouts are still coming and the clapping is still ringing out, settling into an insistent rhythm out of the final applause. And down on the floor and behind the bar, they can all see it.

We got battered, we got bruised. We never went down, we refused. Now, as we set microphone and guitar down and take our turn to clap, and then go over to thank those who joined and came with us out of such difficult beginnings, everyone around can now see what happened here tonight. 

We won.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, days 122 to 126

Day 122

Saturday April 22

So, Tuesday done and we have our second full London show tonight in The Red Dog Saloon in Hoxton Square, Shoreditch at 6pm. I have high hopes for this. Not so much the actual gig itself, more that Adrian really seemed to get my pitch when I spoke to him. It’s just possible that finding a regular venue could be a big part of the journey to building a very real audience. It could start here as well as anywhere else.

Until we arrive. Oh damn. The place is a restaurant. It really didn’t look like one when I came in here and spoke to him. As soon as we see that, me and Maja are like, ‘No. This isn’t going to work.’ We wait for Adrian to extricate himself from being very busy and then just tell him, sorry, but no. Oh. What are we going to do now? We were all set up for this. Maja has it. Let’s go do the Now Hustle. Why not? 

This first leads us into two bars in this square. Both seem like they could really be something. For one of them, we get talking to the security guy on the street, and he then offers to show us the place. Cool. It goes back to another place, back to another place. There are the private rooms. And then through another door, and oh. You’re in a full on music venue with a huge stage and a room that could hold up to 200 people. All from that little frontage that we first saw. The place is huge. Definitely worth coming back to. We’re not yet quite able to fill a 200 capacity venue, but maybe we could play with someone who could. Just thinking out loud, this could be a place to come back and maybe trial something out front and get to be known by the management. Then…

But the place is empty right now so we don’t Now Hustle it. We thank our guy for his tour and onto the next. Which is another venue on the corner of the square advertising live music. Again, no manager to talk to and again, it’s empty right now. But again, very worth coming back to.

Out of the square and onto the main streets and we head for a bar called The Reliance that I’ve had my eye on in my previous hustle sessions. It’s right round the corner from where we live, and is a lovely looking single rectangular shaped bar with a kind of alcove out back, and has a totally simple bar feel to it. So many of the bars round here are supercool with distinctive features and offerings, and that really is all great and interesting and a big part of what makes Shoreditch Shoreditch. But it’s also cool to find a place like this that looks like it’s not trying at all. Just come in. It’s just a bar.

I came in here last Monday but the manager wasn’t around. I was told he might have been in later that day, but then I got the Red Dog gig and called it a day with a memo to come back here some other time. Well, now is that other time and here we are.

We’re met just inside the door by Mario, the owner, and he immediately comes across as quite gregarious and open. We give him our pitch and he’s all, why not. Come and do your thing. So we do. Not to too many people but the short, sharp four song set we play is very well received by the people that are here, with one guy in particular coming over to join us at the bar afterwards. He is madly enthusiastic about us. A great example of one fan at a time. And he buys us a beer. As he’s chatting, he says, ‘To make it as a new band you need an edge.’ Oh yeah? Inside I’m telling myself just to swallow whatever he’s about to offer as advice and be graceful. Then he adds, ‘You guys have that edge.’ Oh. Thankyou very much. That’s OK then. ‘All you have to do now,’ he continues, ‘is just get out there and keep getting out there.’ Which, as you can see, we’re doing, we say to him both in our own ways. ‘Yes. Yes you are. It’s fantastic to see.’

Now he tells us about the area he lives in now – Hastings – saying it could be a great place for us to try. Yeah. Once we start venturing out of London to hustle, this could now be high on our to do list. It’s right on the south coast, about a two hour drive from here. Maybe a bit far, but maybe still worth bearing in mind. 

A little while later we get to talk to Mario who’s been busy upstairs in the kitchen turning out what looks like excellent pub food. He’s really happy with what we’ve done here tonight and we suddenly realise the place has got busy. He seems to realise at the same time and says, ‘Do you want to play again?’ He laughs to show he’s joking and we laugh too. But we think he really would have been happy if we had been here to play to this newly developed crowd. ‘A guy came in here a while ago and also asked to play on the spot,’ he says. ‘He emptied the place. After that I said I’d never say yes to that again. But then you two walked in. All humble but with a very good energy.’ And he really wanted to see where that could go. Well, here we are. He says he’ll be going away soon as he generally gets quiet over summer. The place will still be open but he won’t be here. When he gets back, he says he’d be very open to talk about us coming and playing here again and see how it goes. Just like that, out of such a false start of a night, we’ve potentially opened a venue for ourselves. Right round the corner from where we live.

Around the same time, Matt calls. He and a group of friends are heading to Shoreditch to go The Big Chill, one of the nightclub type places just off Brick Lane. Would we be up for it? Absolutely. Turned a gig down, gone out and got another one and played it, and now into Shoreditche’s Saturday night life. Tomorrow really isn’t going to get much out of us.

Day 123

Sunday April 23

It really doesn’t.

Day 126

Wednesday April 26

Maja decides we should go and try an open mic tonight. I have one on my list. All About Eve in Camden Town. And it’s on. Cool. We head down there for sign up at 7, with the thing starting at 8.

Arriving we meet the host Paul who’s just setting up and he asks where we want to go on the list. It’s currently empty, apart from his name at the top to start. All down the left hand side are numbers for the slots. I ask what he’d recommend and he says that he could say slot number four or five, but if I write our name there, the next person could just choose six and so on. Oh OK. You really can’t be too cute or second guess-ey about these things. So I say we’ll help him out and go first. After him of course. In what is a full night of performers, our slot at the top of it all is the peak for attendance so, totally unexpectedly, we do get the best slot. I told you you couldn’t second guess these things. 

So far at open mics we’ve asked people to select songs at random for us to play. Tonight we’re using it to try out a few new song, or at least lesser established songs – Give Me The World and Without A Gloria. Give Me The World competes with My Game My Rules for the heaviest song we have, and I certainly think it’s our most intense. Then Without A Gloria is more mid tempo with a warming gentle start. It’s a real contrast to go from the huge ending of Give Me The World into the delicate openings of Without A Gloria. We still haven’t fully connected with either of these to comfortably play live, but no matter. Both still totally hit here tonight. People really buy into the intensity of it and come along with us for the ride. Then, when Without A Gloria comes in, they’re there for that as well, their emotions segueing as effortlessly as we click from one mindset to the other. The room really is with us. For the third, we’re back to the cards and How You RocknRoll gets picked out which gives us a really good sprint to close it out.

As the evening is coming to an end, Paul comes up to us and says, ‘I’m going to put you guys on again so you can headline the thing.’ And he does. And we do. For just one song to end the night. We don’t go to the cards for this one. As soon as he says it, we both know. We’re doing I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). The cheers are still going on at the close of this song when Paul announces to the room, ‘I think we’re going to need another one.’ Well, what can we say? I think it makes quite the statement that after closing so strong with a song of our choosing that we now return to the randomness of the cards and let someone else pick what we’re going to finish with. The Cat comes out. Oh yes, this is a massive end to a really cool evening. And yet again we’ve been asked to close an open mic after playing it for the first time. This also happened in Germany.

A big part of playing open mics, and going to gigs, is having the chance to meet and talk with other songwriters and performers and just people in general. We get speaking to someone now as things are winding down who’s keen to see how we’ve been getting on gigging. When we tell him our model of just turning up and hustling to play there and then, he says he’s never thought of that and has never heard of anyone doing it. ‘I’m sorry but I might just have to steal that one,’ he says. Me and Maja jump in and say the same thing at the same time. ‘Yes, please do steal it.’ The next bit of course we don’t say at the same time. That would be just a bit strange. But our general message to him is, Tell everyone else you meet about it and tell them to do it. If more people are doing this it might make it a bit easier.

And there’s more after this. Bar manager Tom tells us we were really entertaining and should come and play again. I get talking to him and tell him how we generally operate and he likes the sound of it. The result of that, with Maja away in Sweden next week and for most of May, is a loose arrangement for me to come back sometime soon, have an afternoon coffee with him, and see where that takes us. Let’s not jump the gun, but yes, let’s. Saturday gave us the possibility of a regular venue in Shoreditch, or at least a conversation to be had. Now we have an in in Camden. We also have possibilities in central too. Shoreditch, Camden, central. I think those three areas are the key to breaking London open. Not counting The Dial Up in March, tonight brings our gig count here up to seven. A reminder. The Dial Up aside, Mike’s Acoustify on Sunday April 9 was our first London show. That was two and a half weeks ago.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, days 130 to 152

Day 130

Sunday April 30

Just a quiet Sunday with vague plans to have a wander down to The Marquis during late afternoon. There may or may not be some music on. And we may well catch Tommy and have a chat about playing in there. However, we’re not entirely sure what that means because we don’t fit the general model of playing two 45 minute sets or two hours I used to do here or anything like that. We’re really just thinking that every now and again we might be able to jump up after or during someone like we accidentally did in here a few weeks ago. It’s most unlikely to pay, and we’re not entirely sure about doing the hat. We’re pretty much going with: this is London, we’re trying to build, so just getting ourselves out there is enough and we think this is a great venue in which to do that. But really, just a Sunday hang and anything else is a bonus. As we often say, you’ve just got to be on the scene and keep being on it. Which is why we went to The Reliance yesterday for a drink or two, in the process getting to know some of the bar staff and having a lovely little fun catchup with the owner, Mario.

We walk into The Marquis at some time after six. Oh cool The Poptarts are on. This is the band who was on when we came in near closing time two weeks ago just as they were finishing. Tommy offered us the stage and we rocked the place. It’s really cool to walk in now and get a big hello from them from the stage and also from a lot of the barstaff who were in at the time as well. I’m sorry, but it really does feel like a bit of an entrance.

And there’s Tony as well watching everything from just about stage right. He also comes over and says hi and I introduce him to Maja and tell him we’re playing together now. Tony saw me play in here way back when so knows what I’m about and almost immediately he says, ‘Do you guys fancy getting up?’ I think he’s joking, but no. We soon discover this is a bit of an open stage. Not quite an open mic – although Tony might disagree but it doesn’t have that vibe – but more a show played by Tony who is joined by different friends, with the stage being, as I said, open. And now he’s offering to open it to us. Well, thankyou very much. We will take that. Not long after we’ve got our drinks, we’re summoned and called to the stage. The place is packed and very well warmed up. Tony has told me there’s a guitar on the stage I can use and it comes complete with a set of plectrums and a capo. Game on. We haven’t brought anything with us so we have no wireless gear at all and Maja’s using their microphone and of course, lead. So today will see us perform exclusively from a stage for the first time since April last year – The 22nd, and John Lees, Tullamore incase you’re wondering. I certainly was. We play four songs and oh, it goes massive. It’s also fantastic that some of the bar staff were here last time we played so they know at least two of the songs we play today. And the fact that they know them really does show.

We leave the stage and settle in for the rest of the afternoon as Tony leads a quite wonderful show with various people joining him, including some of the bar staff getting up and doing their thing. What an amazing event to have walked in and become part of. Tommy’s having a great time out front and is joining in everything. He and Maja have a huge hug when we leave. Maybe we can just keep doing stuff like this in here? That would be enough. No need to have a talk about that. This is one of our hang out places anyway.

Now we join all the people involved in today’s show in The Lemontree pub just round the corner. Among other fun conversations is one with Tony who tells us to keep an eye on when they have events happening and to let him know when we can make it. That way he can put us on for a bit longer. We were delighted with what we got today, but sure we’d take longer. He then says that after that, he may well put us on in his local area which is just outside London. Out there, he says, he might be able to make sure a few of the right people see us. Whatever that could mean, but it does sound pretty good. With that and today’s outing, that could be the sign of a door or two slowly creaking open. It really does feel like it. If nothing else, it’s another open mic, or more, open stage, where we now have a reputation and can put our name up whenever the opportunity arises. And now we can add a second show now in The Marquis to our gig list.

During all this, Matt gives me a call and says he’s heading to a bar to catch some friends in a live show. We invite our new friends here but they have last trains to catch. As the place starts to close we all joyfully say goodbye and now it’s off to The Queen’s Head just off Piccadilly Circus. In here we catch a good half hour of a fantastic blues rock cover band before we all head off across town to Ain’t Nothin’ But… where we hook up with a few more people we know, not least, Teo who I’ve played with many times in here at the jam nights. He tells us he’s playing his own show here next week. Well, Maja will be in Sweden by then but I’ll be around. Teo, I’ll be there. Not long before we decide to leave, another live band gets started in here so that makes three shows we’ve caught tonight while also having played our own. I told you we were only heading out for a quiet Sunday afternoon. We cap it off with street noodles and a walk back home.

Day 132

Tuesday April 2

Well, it’s that time again. Maja has a few admin things still to sort out in Sweden so she’s off for a few weeks and I’m going to keep ticking along here. We knew that show on Sunday would be our last for a while, and we weren’t even expecting that to happen. So a really great end to our first period of hitting London, and by definition, a really good and solid beginning. And you know, just great that we’ve now tested ourselves on one of the best music scenes in the world, possibly the best, and what we have has continued to work and produce great reactions, just like it has all across Europe. 

There have been a few really big moments for our live show on our journey. Times when our hopes, expectations, and yes, confidence, have had to make contact with reality and we’ve been like, let’s see if it can survive this one. Our very first show at The Trap in Clara. Oh, I was nervous about that one. So confident beforehand, but then, ‘Will this really go down well?’ Yes. Very much so. But then Europe and first Berlin, another of the great music scenes of the world. OK. So we did alright in The Trap. Berlin? And our first show there in the heavy metal bar. What a baptism. And Maja’s first ever show. And yes. Tick. Then how about around Ireland? Would we be able to just turn up in bars and play and be accepted, no, cheered. And would people like it enough to put actual money in the hat? Tick, tick and tick. Then a few other countries and cities, not least The Hague where we were told to forget about it because, while we might have done it other places, what we were trying to do would be impossible there. Nope. Done. Another tick. Great. So it works all across Europe in many different types of bars and scenarios and to many different audiences. But then the toughest test. What about London? The ultimate contact with reality for aspiring original acts. Well, so far, tick.

For building on this now, we do have a few leads for gigs in June and we also have a few open invitations for people we’ve played with so far, very not least The Barrytones from Sunday.  But we’re not entirely sure right now when Maja will be back, so we’ll see where we are when she does return and take it from there.

Day 137

Sunday May 7

So here I am for Teo’s Sunday night in Ain’t Nothin’ But…

I’ve decided to walk here and I’m going to walk home after. I’ve also made sure to be in at least half an hour before the show so that I might just manage a bit of a hang before it starts getting loud. And yes, apart from it being a great blues show, it really does turn into a bit of a reunion night, not least with Woody, who has his own claim on the 100 hour jam when he pulled in a non stop shift of the first 38 hours or so. And yeah, it’s fair to say there’s a bit of reminiscing on that. I also get introduced to a few people who’ve turned up in the past two or three years which is great. As for the people I do know, I haven’t seen most of them since late 2019, so around three and a half years ago. That seems crazy, but really, things generally tend to be quiet in Januarys and Februarys. Then in March 2020, the whole lockdown thing happened. Then in May 2021, just as things were opening up again after a few false starts, me and Maja were off to Ireland. Of course we have been in here once or twice since returning to London, but not on nights when a lot of blues regulars would be around, so not too many (no) familiar faces. So yeah. just a really epic night meeting people again.

Day 138

Monday May 8

The most of the rest of the month now and I get my teeth right into studio and songwriting and all kinds of musical bits and pieces and practice around that. The occasional social out but nothing Diaryable to report. We’re currently a little bit ahead/behind in here so I’ll tell you now. Maja will return on Tuesday May 23, so day 153 so no more Diary days until at least then.

The London Diary: Shoreditch, days 139 to 179

Day 139

Tuesday May 9, 2023

Not really Tuesday, more a few extra thoughts on what I wrote in yesterday’s entry.

That musical bits and pieces and practice I mentioned. A bit part of this is a few demo recordings of upcoming songs which we have planned for the second album. I think we should say it now. We kinda have the next album written too. And albums beyond that. We’re essentially adding new songs all the time so this is going to be a fluid situation of course, but yeah, albums one and two could be pretty much done writing wise if we needed them both right now. I think we’ve said this next bit before, but no harm saying it again if we have. Whatever new songs we have coming up, we plan on keeping the track list as it is for the debut album. Which means we have songs that we consider better than what’s on there which we’re not putting on. We don’t see this as arrogant or complacent, more an assertion that we really want the album that we wrote to exist. We bumped off Run and Smile Is Going Round when Make Me Shine and then The Cat came along, but now that’s done, we really can’t imagine it without any of the other songs. 

Day 154

Wednesday May 24, 2023

Maja got back last night and massively surprises me first thing this morning when she says, I’d really like to do an open mic tonight. Oh. OK. We have a look and All About Eve in Camden is on. Cool. Let’s go and have another bite at that.

As soon as we walk in we meet someone who remembers us from Coppercats, our first London show once we decided we were really going to get going. His name is Martin, also a songwriter, and he becomes our hang out buddy for the evening.

Our big takeaway from tonight is that we need to shake off a bit of rust. As we look down our song list, we realise we don’t feel confident about totally remembering quite a lot of them. We’re badly in need of a few refresher rehearsals with our last show, and indeed our last time playing together at all having been over three weeks ago. 

And not only that. When our turn does come and we have our three decided, something just doesn’t quite feel right. Maybe we’re concentrating a bit too much because the full on energy isn’t quite there. We get a nice reaction, but not huge, and I think it’s telling that we return to our seats feeling completely relaxed and all in our stride, whereas in some performances we’ve been breathing heavily after just one song, and at times ready to drop after three. Yeah. I think we’ve unintentionally phoned it in tonight. But there aren’t too many performers and everyone gets another go round. Not only that, but we can do two songs rather than the one which is customary in a second go around. Well, this time it smashes out and we feel back with so much rust having been shaken off in that first performance. We feel much more connected with the material, with our own performances, and just with each other in a stage environment. The feeling is totally different and the audience reaction is much more what we’ve become accustomed to. Yep. Having the bonus of an extra bite has really made all the difference. If we hadn’t, I believe we may have headed home feeling a little flat, but reassuring ourselves that we had all our previous form to fall back on in terms of confidence. But getting that second chance has made all the difference and totally transforms the feeling we have as we make our way home.

Day 155

Thursday May 25, 2023

We’ve been in London five months now and have decided it’s time to move to Camden Town, the total musical centre of London and the adopted and actual home of so many legendary acts. The Clash, Madness, The Libertines. And of course Britpop, during which time it must have felt like the very centre of the universe. Oasis lived there. And of course Amy Winehouse. She worked in Camden Market before she was famous and there are tributes to her all over Camden Town. Paintings on walls and in shops, bars and cafes, as well as a statue in Stables Market.

The idea of moving around now came from Maja a few days ago when she asked what I would think of it. Totally yes if you’re OK with it. Of course she is otherwise it wouldn’t have come up. She also says she’s really felt the Camden vibe whenever we’ve visited. Yep. I have that too. Especially as I lived just down the road from it in Kentish Town for six years and went there regularly, most notably to The Blues Kitchen. And of course Maja lived in Ktown too for that short period just before we made the move to Ireland. So she has seen Camden before, just not like it is now with Maja’s Lockdown London a semi-distant memory.

The idea of moving to Shoreditch from Ireland back in December was really more for Maja to be close to whatever office she ended up in; it was on the cards for that office to be Soho or Shoreditch. We weren’t even entertaining the idea of living right in among Soho, so Shoreditch it was.

Maja:

I love Shoreditch and I’ve really settled in nicely with my job and the office. I’ve got to know everyone in the office, but to be honest, the music scene in Camden is a better place to be for us and we always really knew that. I would also prefer to have Camden as my own area, where I know my coworkers aren’t walking past my apartment every day. I like my job, but I also like having my own space. So all in all, I think this will just be better for both of us. And hopefully, with me working from home, we might just get more time together to work on music. Which is what really matters in the end.

Mark:

For when Maja does want, or need, to be in the office, Camden to Shoreditch is a very easy commute. A single tube journey on the Northern line of around 10 minutes. The office is around five minutes’ walk from Old Street tube – Old Street being Shoreditch’s destination – so the total time of commute will come down to how far away we end up being from Camden Town tube.

So yeah. Tentative conversations of a possible move have now begun. 

Day 162

Thursday June 1, 2023

We’ve not really been all guns blazing on looking at apartments, it’s more been an idea and a bit of a gentle look around online. Today we go and see our first possible place in Camden after making the call yesterday.

Day 163

Friday June 2, 2023

Oh. Oh. Oh. We’ve got that apartment. We can’t believe it. One call, one viewing and it’s done. We’re moving to Camden Town. To a beautiful one bedroom apartment with a living room that can double as our studio. And the place is even better connected for public transport than Shoreditch – we kinda already knew that part. I also know the area very well, having lived in neighbouring Kentish Town for the previous six years I was in London. With that, I was in Camden Town’s music venues all the time, not to mention the fact that it is home to The Blues Kitchen, my spiritual London music home. All this is very well chronicled in Mark’s Diaries. We’re yet to return to The Blues Kitchen since arriving back in London, but then I’ve hardly been to any other jam sessions either. It’s just that we’re aiming at the original scene now, so we’ve been looking more at open mics and hustling our own gigs rather than being on the jam scene. But I do really have to get myself, and ourselves, there sometime soon though. But back to what matters right now. It’s on. We’re moving to Camden Town. Wow. The place will be available to us from July 8 which is now our official move-in day. We have a plan.

For people not so familiar with London geography, Camden nestles right on the cusp between central London and north to north west London. As such, its postcode area is NW1 (northwest); it’s zone two, but the next station for many tube trains coming through is Euston which is in zone one and about a 15 minute walk away from our new place. Also, while Shoreditch is central London, being right on the edge of the financial district, it’s also over in east London. This means that we now actually have a shorter walk to many central London areas such as Soho, Covent Garden, Trafalgar Square and the like. So we really are maintaining our centrality. Although, as my great friend and regular Diaryworld visitor Paul put it quite brilliantly when I mentioned this idea to him, Camden Town really is our central London. And yes, it very much is. Other areas of London have their own musical brilliance and a great quantity and quality of venues, but yeah, Camden really is it for original acts. Well, where it sits now post Covid and with so many venues closing and having been closed down, I’m not entirely sure. But it is still the very famous Camden. The starting point for so many great bands through the decades. And then in the mid 90s, for many types of music fan, it really was the actual very centre of the universe as it became the home of Britpop. I’d better stop before I go off on a whole history tour of the place, but yeah. That’s where The Diaries are soon going to be calling home. If there’s anywhere else in the world we belong more right now, I really don’t know where it could be.

OK. Let’s do that tour of the place with this quite brilliant video which I think had a previous airing in that previously mentioned Mark’s Diaries. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0v4NqK8lFWg

Seeing as I’ve just stolen this video wholesale, I’ll tell you it comes from the channel of Joolz Guides – London History Walks. Don’t know him, never met him. I’ll let you know if that ever changes, at which time I’ll also tell him about this little posting.

Oh, and on that video above are pubs we now consider as our soon-to-be locals; The Good Mixer (7:35) and The Devonshire Arms (13:06). The Blues Kitchen isn’t in here, but maybe the channel just didn’t have a cool enough historical story for it. Anyway, that place is on Camden High Street, pretty much equidistant from The World’s End and Koko (9:55). And I should also add that Camden has so many more music venues and bars amenable to music than are shown in this video which, as its channel suggests, is about history and not just a venue round-up. 

Day 171

Saturday June 10, 2023

A bit of a recap is due now I think beginning with two things that you hopefully already know. After our first spate of gigs which finished at the end of April, Maja went away. Then the day after she got back we played All About Eve on May 24. Shortly after that Maja got a bit sick. Nothing major, but enough to curtail any thoughts of getting on stage and smashing into our high energy performances. That lasted a week or so. Then, just as she was starting to come around, I went down with the same thing. Again, nothing major, but no, not up for running around London and performing. As this past week wound down to Friday, I began returning to fullness and now we think we’re starting to be able to get ready to take things on again. With that in mind, we’ve decided that if the weather is good tomorrow, we’re going to take ourselves out to a park and do some outdoor rehearsal. We have done a few light sessions in the mild frustration that has been the past few weeks so we’ve at least reconnected with a lot of elements of what we have songwise. We now feel that one good concentrated session could shake the dust off of what’s left, and we could then maybe even start moving into some new song territory; we do have a few new ones written and waiting to be worked on to be made gig ready. If we can motor through the rest of the rust tomorrow, we might just start to make some dents on the next stages.

Day 172

Sunday June 11, 2023

Oh what a rehearsal that turns out to be. Totally transcends the concept of rehearsal. No, it doesn’t turn into a show in the park, although we do get applauses occasionally from people walking – or biking, or rollerblading – past. Most of this comes in our warm up when we play a song or two we’re more familiar with just to get ourselves going, and to get them crossed them off the list early. But after that we just get really into it in a very concentrated way and in the most amazing setting right in between two waterways. Barges lined up behind us on the Hertford Union Canal and, across the pedestrian roadway running through the park in front of us, a lovely little walkway bridge going over a small lake to one of the tiny islands. All of this in glorious sunshine and accompanied by a quite wonderful chicken Afghan takeout from one of the street food stalls among an enormous row of offerings as we entered the park. Yes. This is how to rehearse. Inspired by our surroundings, and keen to make the most of the fact that we’ve made the effort to get out here in the first place, we do indeed achieve our main objective of shaking off all of our rust and pulling all of our songs back into place. And then even more as we manage to put in some solid work on a new one coming up, one we’ve had on our to do list for way over a year. Yeah, some of these things can linger in the background for a while, then other times they can explode into life and completion from out of nowhere.

Day 176

Thursday June 15, 2023

Now we’re feeling ready to play again, we know Mike is doing his Acoustify thing tonight in Bishops in Fulham which we played a few weeks ago. Short notice but Maja wanted to wait till this morning to see if she thought her voice would be up for it. Yep. Good to go if Mike can fit us on. I give him a call and he says the bill’s all fixed but if we’re happy about going first, we’re on. Yep. Absolutely fine and thankyou very much. Not too much to report but it’s just great to get back on it. A shame none of the locals from last time are around tonight, but just really cool to keep that scoreboard ticking with another three songs blasted out live.

Day 178

Saturday June 17, 2023

We’ve had the car parked out in zone four for free street parking. The last time we went to check on it, take it for a drive and repark somewhere else the battery had run down. Today we take a new battery, get that fitted and then it’s off for a drive to work it in. For that we decide to go and visit St Albans, an old significant Roman town. Our destination is Verulamium Park where we have a wander and take in the site of the old Roman city. There’s not a great deal left to see but it is really cool to stand in the shadows of history and to be able to see and touch ancient stones which were part of imposing buildings almost 2000 years ago with the first known mention of the city dating back to AD62. A chunk of the old city wall is still standing and the foundations of the original entrance for goods are still there still in perfect shape corresponding to the walls they once held up. A wonderful parkwalk around a beautiful lake and history duly taken in. Home time, car reparked and mission accomplished. 

Day 179

Sunday June 18, 2023

The plan for today is two open mics. One early to mid afternoon in Camden, then another right next to Piccadilly Circus in the West End sometime around 9. What we’re going to do in between them we’re not entirely sure.

The first one is in The Green Note on Parkway, just a little up from the Dublin Castle towards Regents Park. I know I’m getting all a little micro London geography now, but I think it’s worth noting especially when talking about places of such musical history like Camden and the West End. The Green Note itself is historical enough. With music seven nights a week, it opened almost 20 years ago and I believe its open mic night has been going for 15 years. At least deep into double figures. At first I think it’s a bit mad that I’ve never heard of it or noticed it, not least because I’ve been to Dublin Castle many times and walked up Parkway a lot more. But then I realise yet again that for the six years I was around here previously when living in Kentish Town, I wasn’t pursuing the original scene much at all so it makes perfect sense that this place stayed beneath my radar.

We arrive to find a pretty cool and chilled coffee-house vibe with songwriters generally leaning towards slightly older guys.  I think the word would be troubadours. Certainly of the more experienced end and yes, we are treated to an afternoon of songs of joyful depth. There’s a decent stage and sound system and a guest host in Barry who’s actually quite funny while also being modestly understated. He makes everyone feel at ease and he puts us on at around five or six on the list. As we settle in and look around, it seems almost everyone is here to play and so it proves. It’s not far off the kind of vibe we saw in Dublin with the Songwriter Collective with songwriters essentially gathering to play for each other in a public yet private environment. This proves to be one of the most consistently high standards we’ve seen at a songwriter event and it’s a real joy to be in the audience for. Then when it’s our turn, I think it’s also fair to say the energy level raises a few notches as we prowl around the middle of the floor and smash out our two songs. One of them is Talk About The Weather which contains the line, ‘Yeah but we’re alright/Under the skylight.’ A wonderful moment to arrive at in here, performing as we are under a large rectangular skylight with the sun shining down on us. 

We’ve made a few friends at the front table just by the stage, and as we return they are looking up at us with their mouths just totally open in some kind of shock. Performance done and it’s time for carrot cake. I did say it was a coffee shop vibe didn’t I? Yep. It’s fantastic and highly recommended. A wonderful way to round off part one of the day. Although as a few more performers come and do their thing, it’s still not quite over as there’s a cool, chilled hang afterwards. Not massively long, but yeah. A little bit of mingling and general socialising. Until we’re the last people left, so really time to leave. 

Now to prepare for evening and we go to the Doner Kebab place opposite The Blues Kitchen. During food time Maja begins to fade a little and we’re wondering if we’re going to make it to the next thing. We know we’ll be living round here soon enough, so that means we’ll have a lovely pit-stop place to go, take a nap, and get out again if we want to do that. But not today. We’re considering calling it and going home and taking out little triumph when I suddenly see a familiar face walking right by the window and preparing to cross the road. Yep. It’s my old workmate Joe from The Lord Palmerston. Pandemic and all that, I haven’t seen him since early 2020. Oh, it feels mad just typing in that year. I’m up and out of the place and he’s massively surprised to see me suddenly appear in the middle of Camden High Street. He says he’s on his way to The Spread Eagle to meet some friends, right across the road from The Dublin Castle. So we instantly invite ourselves along. Right The Spread Eagle. Part of the same group that owns The Palmerston. And as we settle in there, I learn that my old boss Moni from The Palmerston was the boss in here until not too long ago. And my good friend Eraldo, also from The Palmerston, is now a chef in here. OK. Backtrack a little. On our way to The Green Note earlier on, we heard a call from across the street. Sounded like my name. So we looked across, then up. And there was Eraldo hanging out of the window above The Spread Eagle. He was in mid Sunday lunch rush or something, so of course couldn’t hang out too much. But we had a little shouty hello and we were on our way. Green Note done, and now here we are.

I ask permission of the bar staff and then me and Maja go upstairs and into the kitchen and have a wonderful reunion with Eraldo, who also knew Maja from before Ireland. He’s leaving here soon, in a week or so. We really have only just caught him. Brilliant. This really has all picked us up and risen our energy levels. A bit more fun downstairs then it’s goodbyes and we’re off again. Sunday part two. Or is it part three now? Yeah. Probably that.

It’s straight to the centre of the West End we go now. To Leicester Square tube. Through Leicester Square itself, through Piccadilly Circus, and then onto Haymarket Street. There, we find the magical venue Wonderville where a monthly open stage event is having its debut night. And a wonder it really is. It feels as though we’re intruding on a jazz rehearsal as we walk through the small but high ceilinged bar and through into the main venue. A large, ball room type space filled with round tables. And, at the far end, a really decent sized and very bright and colourful stage. We hear it all before we see it. Swinging jazz band and two singers already totally in performance mode even though there’s no-one there. But there is now, as we walk in and they wave at us  enthusiastically from the stage. Maja immediately hits performance mode and waves back. The song finishes and they declare soundcheck over for now and the two singers leave the stage and walk toward us as we walk towards them, the four of us meeting in the middle with huge welcoming hugs. And this is how we meet Phil and Di for their first ever open mic in here. The announcement we read from them is one of the best descriptions of an open mic I’ve ever seen so we just had to come and check it out. I’m going to drop it right here in full.

Step into the spotlight at the West End’s newest and most thrilling cabaret venue! It’s time to showcase your talent at this exhilarating open mic night. Whether you’re a singer, an instrumentalist, or a trio that can captivate with jazz, cabaret, musical theatre, pop, rock, or even opera, all performers of all genres and levels of experience are welcome. If you’re eager to participate with a high-energy and fun-filled performance (lengthy ballads are discouraged), signups begin at 7:30 p.m., so don’t be late! All you need to bring is any sheet music in the correct key, with a copy for piano and bass, and the band will do the rest! Gather your friends, family, and fellow music enthusiasts for a night of incredible performances!

High energy. Tick.

Fun filled. Tick.

No lengthy ballads. Tick. Alright, maybe we do have one or two slowies but we don’t have to play them. Besides, we really are mostly all about the high energy.

It should be said now that Phil and Di are true professional performers with a wealth of musical West End experience. Veterans of their own sold out shows, as, we will discover, are many of the people who turn up to perform tonight. For now we know none of this and just enjoy the moment as we take it all in and tell Phil and Di what we’re all about. They love the sound of it and ask if we’re OK with opening tonight’s show. Oh yes, we are. Which is how we come to be the first act to play the inaugral Di and Phil’s Open Mic Party at Wonderville.

Until then we sit back and enjoy watching them and their band continue with soundcheck and warming up. Over the next 10 or 20 minutes the room starts to fill up with audience members and more performers until there’s a decent presence in the room and we very much no longer have it all to ourselves. Then it begins and we’re called to the stage. Now, for the first time, we find ourselves about to perform in the West End in front of an audience made up of experienced West End performers. Like Di and Phil, there are people in here who have put on their own sold out shows. We are in front of some serious heavyweight professionals. This is also by far the biggest stage we’ve ever stood on and by a long way the most colourful and expressive. 

Phil introduces us and Maja has a little hello with the audience telling them we’ve decided to change our songs around a bit. We had one idea of what we were going to play, but then Di and Phil starting talking about the nasty rain that may have put one or two people off from coming here tonight. That’s OK though. It means we’re left with the hard core. With that, Maja announces our first song. Talk About The Weather. Halfway through, with everyone out front bouncing along, we start to move through the gears as we wander off the stage and in among them, staying there for the break where we manage to get everyone clapping along to the mid section. Oh yes. They’re up for it. After this, we think we have to bring out I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). For which we largely return to the classy stage. And it’s really great to see once again that some spontaneous rhythmic clapping pops up in the middle of it as our short set really catches. And yes, it really has caught tonight. The reaction as we finish is enormous. Then a really cool and new bonus for us as Di and Phil tell us to stay where we are. They’re going to come up and do a little interview, a fantastic feature which continues with every act performing tonight. And it really works. Nothing in depth of course. Just a little bit about us writing our Diaries as we also attempt to answer their question as to how we met in just a few words. But the really stand out moment here is when Phil looks at us, holds his breath for a beat, then says, ‘You guys have invented a genre.’ A stand out moment here? Wow. That’s a stand out moment for The Diaries full stop. A seasoned West End performer and all round music lover is announcing to an audience of his peers that The Diaries have invented a genre. This is ours. Yep. We’ll take that. Wow.

Well, we were on first. So now we can relax and just enjoy the show. Everyone else is a solo singer, accompanied by the house band, fantastically playing along spontaeously to supplied sheet music or charts. And it’s all mostly big show tunes. Ladies and gentlemen, I can tell you it’s every bit as huge and entertaining as you would think it could be. With a wonderful bonus moment when one of the female performers takes on an Abba song and invites everyone on stage to sing with her. So now we’re also part of a chorus line. 

When it’s all over, we mingle around and Di and Phil very graciously tell us we’re part of the family now and to please come again. I did have doubts that our frenetic rockpop may have been a little out of place among the showtunes. But hey, someone did Abba. So pop’s OK. And so too, apparently round these parts, are we.

And here’s the video of our performance at Wonderville, where you can also find links to Di and Phil. 

The London Diary: Shoreditch, days 185 to 200

Day 185

Saturday June 24

We’re just having a casual afternoon wander around the neighbourhood and venturing a little further out, through and beyond the hugely striking Barbican residential area. Then we’re aware something is happening on a busy street and we’re intercepted by a girl with a headset and asked if we wouldn’t mind stopping for a few minutes. We’ve stumbled right onto an open street film set. She says we can’t really go through because, well, it’s summer and we’re wearing shorts and stuff so wouldn’t even blend in as accidental extras. All around us a whole crowd of people is kindly co-operating and the girl now explains what’s happening and we look down the street and see for ourselves. All around, business is going on as usual. But for a stretch of a hundred yards, maybe quite a bit more, the street is scattered with people in full raingear, many carrying umbrellas. Huge cameras are everywhere, including a few on cranes. It takes us a while to realise, but even the ‘traffic’ is extras. Including a red double decker bus and some old style taxis. Across the road we now see a rainmaking machine spraying rain, and there are the actors. Stars Gary Oldman and Kristen Scott Thomas. Oh yes. Slow Horses, the unorthodox spy thriller about a bunch of dysfunctional and idiosyncratic spies. That’s the one, says the girl. Yeah. This has also been filmed on a few streets right round our place, then for a few days exactly outside our place. So close that we received a letter at the time saying it was happening. So yeah. Now and again, for the past few weeks we’ve been walking in and around film sets anytime we’ve been nipping out. And now we’ve stumbled across another of their locations, but this time when it’s full-on live. There are the two stars over there and we decide we just have to stay and watch. This is live TV of a whole different level. There’s a large corner bar right at the end of the set with a garden out front. We set ourselves up there and spend the afternoon watching a hit TV show getting made. I must report that this is not the most spectacular of scenes, mostly involving people coming out of buildings and getting into cars while normal everyday action happens all around them. But it really is cool to see this level of production when it’s all going on. So sorry. To cut right to it, we basically spend the afternoon in a pub watching a TV show.

Day 188

Tuesday June 27

We’ve been meaning to go to Troy Bar’s open mic for quite a while. Troy Bar is a huge fixture on the London scene, frequented by a lot of top musicians, many of whom make up the supporting line for major international artists. I used to come to the Friday night jam here all the time. The one that began at 1am. Never been to the open mic and I have really high hopes for it. We’ve really been waiting for this one. We almost played a few weeks ago, then one of Maja’s out of town work colleagues was around so we went out with him instead. Now the night has arrived when we will finally put ourselves out in the famous Troy Bar. We arrive full of anticipation and walk up to the door. Eight quid each says the doorman, almost as though someone just pulled a string out of his back.

‘We’re here to play,’ says Maja. Absolutely no response. ‘We have to pay to play an open mic?’ she asks. The unmoved doorman doesn’t even look at us. Just keeps staring into the distance off to his right, nods and may say yes, or maybe I imagine that bit. I know pay to play happens a lot and we’ve said we won’t do that – which knocks it on the head for us with so many grass roots ‘promoters.’ Yeah, right – but pay for entry to play an open mic? Even at the Troy Bar. No. Just no. That’s really disappointing. As for having what seemed like cast iron plans cast out. I generally find that quite disorienting. All planned for a night out that now isn’t happening. It really can throw me a bit. Well, that makes two of us. What do we do now? It’s Tuesday. Hardly the most hopping of nights even in Shoreditch. We’re mildly discombobulated and stop on the street to think about which direction to go if we’re not to just go straight home. I suggest The Bridge Bar for a bit of a hang. ‘Yes,’ says Maja. Great shout. This is the place where Rico, the bar manager, saw a video of us and flipped. He said he wanted us to play outside, maybe in June when the weather was stable and hot. The weather hasn’t been massively stable so I’ve not been back. But this could be good timing to go and have a bit of a hang there and maybe have a bit of a connect with the place. We get there and it’s closed. OK. What now? What’s now is that we’re just kind of half heartedly in search of somewhere else. We briefly consider The Blues Kitchen. Not much going on. We really do think about it, but we decide the music’s just too loud. So hardly an environment in which you’re going to encounter and chat to interesting strangers, Blues Kitchen or not. OK. Back to the street it is. Might as well just go home. No point dropping into a dead place and propping up the bar during a slow evening just for the sake of it. But it does feel like a shame to be heading back home after such high hopes as we headed out. The Troy Bar. We were going to play the Troy Bar. Oh well.

Walking through the back streets, we suddenly hear live music and see we’ve come across the back window of a venue and can see the back of a girl playing guitar and singing. To a really quite big audience. Oh. What is this? We see a poster on the wall advertising tonight and it’s something called the 52 Song Project. Oh. What’s that all about then? I have heard of it. We see the entrance is round the corner and decide to go check it out. It’s in The Strong Rooms, another venue I’ve been meaning for us to check out. Now we can, and this looks cool. We walk through the front bar and into the music venue space we were round the back of a few minutes ago. It’s standing room only and everyone is fully captivated listening to the current performer. There’s guitar cases everywhere so clearly a lot of people are expecting to play. When the girl has finished, a short Q&A/ feedback session starts. OK. This is different. Then the host comes up and announces the next act. What kind of open mic is this? We make our way to the bar with the intention of catching the host when she has a minute. This proves more difficult than it sounds because there is absolutely no talking while performers are on and this rule is observed with total respect. So we respect it too. In the meantime we just settle back and watch the show. People are getting just one song each, but there’s also that little mini session after each song with questions and feedback welcomed. Damn these guys are good. A very high, consistent standard and all originals. Then we get a chance to introduce ourselves to the host, Kate. She says the roster is very full but she’ll see what she can do. Fair enough. We settle back again and truly, truly, enjoy the show. If we get to be part of it, brilliant. If not, we don’t. Whatever happens, we feel our misfiring night has been rescued.

As the performers come and go, we start to learn what this is all about, and I remember one or two things I’ve heard about it as well. Yes. The 52 Song Project. Or 52SP to give it its actual title. Something songwriter Kate thought up during lockdown in 2020 when she decided to set up a thing to see if she could encourage songwriters to write a song a week for a year. The thing just grew and grew and grew. Now they have all kinds of industry connections and seen members sign record deals, management deals and get some serious radio play. We’ve just managed to stumble into their final event of the year. As it progresses on and we hear people’s stories of what 52SP has meant to them and how much it has inspired them to write and we start to think that maybe we have no place being on that stage tonight. This is their thing. We can’t just turn up and gatecrash the party. The hoping we might play has turned to realising we might not, to kind of hoping that we don’t to really deciding to very respectfully turn down the opportunity should it come. This stage tonight belongs to the people who have made 52SP what it is. To the people who have consistently dedicated themselves to the project, many of them for a few years now as it has emerged from lockdown to become a real force. We continue this sentiment right to the end when Kate graciously invites us onto the stage to take part in the photoshoot for all the members. No thankyou very much. This is a moment for you guys. We’re just happy just to have been here for tonight.

Day 194

Monday July 3

For the past week or so I’ve been quite steadily working in the studio, writing new songs and completing a few that were in the solid idea stage, and then recording a few demos for those songs. There have been some rehearsal sessions too, and I’ve been keeping up with writing in here. All that stops for a while today as the job begins of preparing for the move to Camden which will happen on Saturday. We have a van booked and have also booked the man to help with some of the moving stuff. And Matt has very kindly agreed to help, for which we have offered a good solid night out at some point.

As always with beginning a move, it all feels a bit daunting but this is nothing like the move from Ireland which seemed to take forever to get all packed away. That was also done in stages with all our stuff taken to storage in Dublin over four trips, for pickup and London delivery at a later date. It also included a lot of clearout with charity shop sorting and trips and quite a few rubbish dump trips. This time we’re just getting everything driven straight to the new place. A couple of bigger furniture pieces this time round but apart from that, we’re confident we can have all this ready in a week. OK. Let’s go.

Day 197

Thursday July 6

Out for drinks with Maja’s work colleagues tonight and we get talking to a friend of one of them who’s visiting London from Edinburgh. Maja’s musical adventures have been of more and more interest to her colleagues and the guy we’re talking to now is aware of them. He asks if we’re planning on going to the Edinburgh festival. We weren’t. We haven’t organised anything. He says that a lot of bars are open to music and it would be worth going and trying. He mentions a couple of bars he knows with one that is organising music that might just have a spot or two available. Unlikely, he says, but worth a try.

This conversation lights something up in me and Maja and we start to talk about the possibility of just going and trying our luck. As it happens we’ve been talking recently about possibly going to Scotland for August. Maja would love to see it and of course we’ve been planning on taking our gear and hustling. Why not just try that during the Edinburgh Festival? 

If you don’t know, this is considered by many to be one of the most important arts festivals in the world and takes place in venues across the whole city for three weeks in August. And we’re gonna go have a go at it. Absolutely no idea how.

Day 198

Friday July 7

Right. Let’s think about this thing. The two big questions are how to stay and how to play.

How to stay.

There’s no way we’re going to pay for a hotel or hostel, even if one would be available this late in the day. We’re considering camping. I check the official camp site. Fully booked. I check out a few more going further and further away from the city. Conclusion. Some cheap options but just far too far away. One example is about a mile away from its nearest train station. That doesn’t sound fun. Getting into the city. All day whatever we’re doing. Then wait for a train, then a trek back the other end, probably also carrying a speaker and whatever else. For two weeks. Just no. We have a think then Maja suggests we just sleep in the car. We have a Toyota Yaris. Yeah. Let’s do that. Then the supplementary idea. Join a national gym in Camden which will give us access to showers in Scotland. OK. That’s that sorted.

How to play

As in what are we actually going to attempt to do when we get there. We’ve had a think about this now and we’re just going to hustle, and maybe do the hat. So, as we were in Ireland, just with a whole festival kicking off around us. We have come up with some thoughts and ideas of what that might look like, but probably best to get there and see how it goes and write about that rather than try to second guess the thing. What we’re not doing is emailing or calling venues ahead to try to get something organised. We really are coming to the conclusion that, at least as far as we’re concerned, it’s better to put ourselves in front of people and make things happen that way. Besides, if a venue is doing music during the Edinburgh festival I can’t imagine the volume of emails they’re getting or how many prospective acts are asking to play. Our email probably wouldn’t even be seen. So yeah. We’re just going to get on the ground, do our thing and see how it goes. So in conclusion here; how to play? We really don’t know. We’re just going to do it.

Day 199

Saturday July 8

We’re all packed up and ready to go and it’s moving day. The biggest thing to say about all this is what an incredible help Matt is. 

He arrives just as we’re getting started to help us carry everything down the stairs in Shoreditch, then once the van is loaded, me and him travel with the driver to the new place and Maja gets the bus. Which means that when we arrive, we’re straight on it carrying everything up to the second floor. For any doubt, that’s ground, first, second. 

Yes, this is a really exhausting sweaty job, especially on a July day, although I must say, early on in Shoreditch we got quite heavy rain which, as far as I was concerned at least, was a wonderfully welcome relief at times.

Once we’ve said thankyou and goodbye to the man with the van who did also help – a bit – it’s time for beers with Matt in our brand new kitchen. Well, brand new to us. You know what I mean. Oh Matt, what can we say? Just thankyou very much. And how amazing it is to have this huge job of packing, then stuff out of one apartment and into the other all done. Kinda – see tomorrow.

And we live here now. It’s all just a mess of a jumble right now as you can probably imagine, but the potential of what we can do with this place can already be seen.

Day 200

Sunday July 9

So yesterday wasn’t quite enough. We hire a van today and me and Maja go back on our own and complete the job. The very last thing we get in the new place today is the cake trolley. So, day 200 of The London Diary is the day we complete the move out of Shoreditch and into Camden.

The London Diary: Camden, days one to twenty-four

The London Diary: Camden

Day one

Monday July 10

We really are seeing the difference between the Ireland to London move and the inter London one. Apart from anything else, not having to put anything in storage to move later, meaning it’s all been done in one weekend and two trips. Which means we’re able to get this place looking like almost like a home by sometime early to mid afternoon. It also helps that Maja’s taken today off so we’re both on it from first thing in the morning.

The plan for this place shapes up like we thought it would with the bedroom and then a living room/studio situation. And being out of the city city, we’ve got clear sky outside our windows rather than looming buildings. So it all feels more open and private. Yes. This is all really starting to feel like home already.

Day two

Tuesday July 11

Today is the last official day of us having the Shoreditch apartment, and with that, and with us all fully moved out and in now, I go and return the keys. I also have to return to the apartment during this little errand because we forgot to do a final meter read, so I get to enter the apartment and see it exactly as we saw it on the first day we moved in and caught our first sight of it. Except this time there isn’t even any initial luggage to drop on the floor. So it’s just a cold, hard, white space. A space we really did manage to turn into a home. I’m in and out without sentimentality. Functional. Take the reading. Leave. Double lock the door. Leave the building. Return the keys to where they came from. That’s it. Time to go home.

Day three

Wednesday July 12

For the first time since we arrived in Camden we go out for a drink with no obligations. All our admin is done. The place is basically set up. We’ve been on this everyday for the better part of two weeks. I suggest The Earl Of Camden, which is a wide open sports bar with basic bar food. And the last of the day of Wimbledon is on with subsequent highlights. Perfect. But we don’t take much of it in. Instead, we sit in stunned, relieved exhaustion. The job is done. And it has been really hard and totally wiped us. We order food and when it comes we just sit in silence and eat. That action in itself takes all our energy and focus. Right now, we really do not have anything left to give. But in all that, I think is, a sense of achievement as well. Of having landed. Of having done it all and finished. And now here we are, with nothing left to have to think about. Oh it is glorious. But this doesn’t feel like a celebration, even if deep inside it is. I think relief is the only word as we sink into the cottonwool embrace of this extended moment. 

Day four

Thursday July 13

We’ve not really explored the local area because, well, unusually for a move, we already know the area pretty well. I mean, it’s Camden. I lived down the road in Kentish Town for six years and me and Maja have been here many times while living in London this time round. And Maja saw it while living in London during the lockdown time prior to the Irish move. But living here offers a whole new perspective and it all feels totally different and even more epic than it did before. Example. We head out properly today for the first time. During lunch, so not even a night out. Damn, it’s almost overwhelming. Out of our front door and a minute or two of walking and we’re launched right into the centre of London touristville, walking towards Camden Market along the canal with a whole new leisure area built next to it that wasn’t there last time we were here. Even a carousel now we see. They’d been building this whole complex for ages but we didn’t really know what it was. Now we see an open plan, multi level series of shops and bars all right next to the canal and lock, which you can also still very much walk beside in today’s glorious sunshine. So practically a whole new little town has sprung up here and we don’t possibly have time to explore it now. So we just walk through it, take in the busy and bustling canal walk. Then we’re up onto street level and right among the music venues and again, packed streets. Damn. We live here now. This is exhilarating. We’ve kind of emerged near the place where I see Camden as splitting in two. So I’ll veer off from our lunchtime walk and try to give you some kind of introductory overview of Camden Town, and what we’ve moved right into the middle of.

We’re a little way down from the underground, so right by the canal and next to the Stables and market area. The food stalls in here make can often make me think I’m on holiday. Then there are so many other kinds of shops and stalls in this famous area as well, along with a whole other bunch of bars and live venues too – a lot of famous comedy around here as well as music. Among venues here are the famous Dingwalls, and the Lockside Tavern. The street snaking down to our right, is what I consider to be the main strip. It runs parallel to the market places and is lined by a whole load of bars and music venues and is topped off by The Roundhouse at the end as you come to Chalk Farm tube station (in my mind this is Camden North). Along the way you will find The Elephant’s Head, Joes, The Camden Assembly Rooms, Spiritual Bar and The Enterprise, all places that have graced The Diaries in one way or another.

Going back to where we were, just a little way along from Camden tube station, if you walk the other way here, you’re onto more a conventional high street. Mostly shops as that would suggest but also home to a few more bars including The Blues Kitchen and, at the end of the high street, is Koko, almost working in tandem with The Roundhouse to bookend Camden. Just opposite Koko you have Mornington Crescent tube (which I see as Camden South). So, actual factual geography and locals may say otherwise, but as I alluded to above, I see Camden as starting at Mornington Crescent and ending at Chalk Farm.

Then in that middle ground – Camden Town tube –  you’ve got a bunch more places on and around the crossroads, not least The World’s End and the attached Camden Underworld, and then The Electric Ballroom. And we’re still nowhere near finished because leading off from this central point is Parkway leading up to Regents Park. Up on this street you will find The Dublin Castle and The Green Note, as well as the aforementioned Earl Of Camden and the equally forementioned Spread Eagle. Oh, and The Edinboro Castle at the end containing one of the best beer gardens in north London. If this part is coming off the high street, well, it comes off the central point really, then leading off from the same direction from a little way down of what I’m calling the strip is Inverness Street. Another famous outdoor market area lined with a load of internationally themed bars and restaurants, some of which regularly host live music of all different kinds. Then at the end of this street you find The Good Mixer, as we’ve said before, the very centre of Britpop when that was all kicking off in the mid to late nineties, and still home for all types of Camden music lovers. 

All that and I haven’t even mentioned venues like metal bar The Devonshire Arms, or Hawley Arms, a destination for rock’n’rollers from all over London and beyond. The Fiddler’s Elbow, another legendary live music venue. Or the Sheephaven Bay, a wonderful, large, meandering low ceilinged Irish bar great for sport round the back by Mornington Crescent. All these and many more are kind of on their own, away from the main streets I’ve been talking about. Not to mention All About Eve where we’ve played a few open mics, which is again kind of slightly off the beaten track around the vicinity of The Good Mixer. Coming full circle (kind of) back to The Mixer is a pretty good place to stop now I think. And yes. The visual and aural assault of the place can be about as overwhelming as trying to take it all in through the page. Yes. We’re going back home now.

Day five

Friday July 14

Maja: ‘Is it bad I feel I don’t want to go out at all and just stay in tonight?’ Absolutely not. I’m still totally wiped too. And besides. We live here now. We can have that Camden night out whenever we want. Even a quiet one to just pop out and back again.

Day six

Saturday July 15

A day trip out to Hammersmith Ikea for a few bits for the new apartment. On the way back, from the top of our double decker bus as it winds down Kensington High Street, we see an unusual and striking sight. We rush our phones out to try to photograph it but the bus moves and and damn it’s gone. But then I check. Oh oh oh. I got it. I had no idea. This is album cover level material. With that, we attach a title with it. It’s a great title. But now we have to write a song to go with it. Just the title song to sit above everything else we’ve earmarked for album number two and to make sure we can actually legitimately use this incredible shot. So no pressure.

Later we decide to head out for dinner somewhere in Camden. We kind of have our eye on an all you can eat Chinese place we checked out during our walk on Thursday. We get round the corner from our place and hear a sharp, surprised cry. ‘Mark!’ ‘Mark!’ I look around and it’s Ivano. My great Italian friend who hardly has a word of English in his vocabulary. He pops over from Italy from time to time and here is now, having popped right in front of us. Oh wow. OK. We have a joyous hug, then I introduce him to Maja. Well, we’re right in front of The Devonshire Arms now so it would be rude not to. Dinner plans postponed, we go in there now for a drink and a catch up. Or as catch up as you can when your friend barely speaks a word of English. But somehow me and Ivano manage to make it work. We always have, although Maja is a bit bemused. But you know, you hear about couples who get together without being able to speak each others’ languages. I’m sure they get there. I’ve never understood that but I know it’s a thing. Well, that’s how it is with me and Ivano. It helps that he loves metal and has seen me play in Cris’ metal band Wild Child, but hey, communication has to start somewhere.

 A few pints in here, then we invite Ivano to join us at the Chinese place, which he very happily does. Yes, it really is fantastic. Then we’re off and planning to go to The Blues Kitchen. Until we discover you have to pay to get in on Saturdays. Oh well. So we go across the road to The Camden Head instead. Where the three of us happily hang out by the bar, then me and Maja decide to dance about the place during which time we manage to engage a few different tables who rise to our energy. When we leave they’re eager to say goodbye and we feel it appropriate to go and say hello properly briefly and to give them cards. So we’ve not even played a gig but we’ve still managed to make an impression and been able to introduce ourselves a little. Now it’s time to head off home. But not for Ivano. No. He’s carrying on into the night, all infused with a bright new energy. We say a very happy goodbye and leave him to it. 

Day seven

Sunday July 16

Right. That Edinburgh thing. We’d decided to sleep in the car, but didn’t really know what that looked like. Well, Maja’s been collecting ideas and has found a way to turn the little Toyota into a lovely little bedroom, complete with mattress. Kind of like a metal tent. Yes. We have a look and we really think this is going to work. Now all we have to do is join that national gym we were thinking of so we can have access to showers. It has a branch right in Camden. We’ll do that sometime during the week and then we’ll be all set.

Remember we promised Matt pizza and beer out for helping us with the move? Well that happens tonight as we first invite him to the apartment to see it now we’re all properly moved in, then we head out to a bar and do the full pizza and beer thing. But we’re not done after that. It’s Sunday. Time to do the thing we haven’t done since we moved back from Ireland. Blues Kitchen jam. And yes there are a few very surprised faces and really cool little reunions when we walk in. Not too many regulars around tonight, but Joe and Adam of the house band are here. And Aristo, and a few general people I would have seen around a lot in years past without knowing that well. But everyone likes to see a familiar face after a while too, so that’s also great. And yes, I get to do my thing on the stage again as Adam, host for tonight, invites me up when the time comes. I don’t get to play with Matt tonight but you can’t have everything. It’s just so cool to be in here and playing on that stage again and having the hang. And for Maja to see it all in full flow again. With us being more on the original burn now, I don’t see this as being a weekly thing like it was back when, but for a jump back in now and then, definitely. Especially as we live just a few minutes’ walk away now. This little jaunt tonight has inspired Maja to start thinking about learning a blues song or two to sing so that we can go up together and just so that she can have a go on that stage too. No idea when or if that will happen, but we do now have it written on a mental card somewhere.

Day eight

Monday July 17

It’s a thing in many parts of London to put your unwanted items out on the street for people to pick up if they want. Sometimes with a sign on electrical stuff saying, ‘This works.’ Today we head away from Camden Town and into the genteel back streets during lunch. Along the way we come across a house that looks like it’s being internally renovated. They’ve put a bunch of stuff outside including a fridge and some other bits and pieces. Among it all is a print of a painting of the Gallagher brothers of Oasis. If I hadn’t said Oasis, what other Gallagher brothers would you have been thinking of right now? Maja’s all over it. We’re having that. It looks fantastic and will look even fantasticker on one of our walls. It also proves quite a conversation piece when we stop at a fast food stand as we’re getting closer to home. The guy who runs it is super friendly and we really get talking about all things music as he prepares our order. When Maja passes him a card and he discovers what we do, he tells us about a friend of his who runs a few cafes who he thinks would love to have us play. OK. A good heads up. Worth a shot. We’ll go and say hello when we get the chance. Leads on gigs from the guy at the streetfood stand. Yep. This is Camden.

The only minor niggle to that is that we’re really not thinking of gigging or open mic-ing too much right now as we concentrate on preparation for Edinburgh. We’re in the process of consolidating all of our repertoire to make sure we can play any song at any moment while also trying to finish a few others we’d quite like to have. Whether or not we actually play or fully learn any of the new ones isn’t a massive deal, but we would just like to give ourselves the best chance of maybe adding one or two of them. And, newsflash. We’re back in the studio trying to get back on track with the album which got taken massively off track all the way back in October or something last year, culminating in the move to London. Which took us even further off track of thinking about the album. So much of it is done, but there is still so much more left to do. But now we’re on it, or at least reconnecting with the studio. But of course, there will then be the Edinburgh period so we’ll be off it again. But it is cool to have it back on our agenda and back on our horizon again.

Day 11

Thursday July 20

Out and about in Camden early evening and Maja gets her first look at The Good Mixer. Not everyone I’ve taken to this place has taken to it. It certainly isn’t for the shy and retiring. I’m just delighted it’s still here after lockdown and all that. Not just still here, but still recognisably The Good Mixer. On the face of it an old style pub with a clear love of music and pool. And when you get into it, it’s a wonderful old style pub with a clear love of music and pool. Maja loves it instantly. Just the one in here today. We will be back.

Day 13

Saturday July 22

We return to The Good Mixer for a Saturday night out and if Maja loved it before, well. DJ tonight and the music is just spot on. Full of guitars, 90s classics and punk favourites. We spend a lot of time on the impromptu dancefloor tonight. Yep. It’s that kind of place. 

Day 14

Sunday July 23

Apart from last night’s trip out, we’ve also been prepping the car for Edinburgh this weekend. Which has meant paying for a secluded, off street car parking spot in Camden, then getting a great bargain on a second hand mattress. It just so happens that the small car park is out the back of our apartment so that’s handy. With that we have of course had to collect the car from it’s zone four parking spot which we did yesterday. Been a very wet weekend but with the mattress fitting perfectly first time, we’ve not had to do as much work or experimentation or prep as we thought. It’s seats down, mattress in. Oh, it fits. That’s where our stuff can go. OK. Can’t bring too much of it. But yeah. We have this. That job done, we take the mattress back the apartment and return the car to a different home in zone four.

Day 18

Thursday July 27

Into The Mixer again tonight, just for a quick one. But yeah. We’re starting to become a little familiar with people now. At least slight nodding terms now. Yeah. This is starting to become our place a little bit. I’d hoped and secretly thought it would.

Day 21

Sunday July 30

A quiet weekend this time. Punctuated by a late night Sunday walk around the more exclusive Chalk Farm/Primrose Hill area. And Maja gets her first proper look at this far end of Camden. A whole bunch of music venues all clustered across the road from The Roundhouse. Some may not still be music venues, but there does seem to be a continuing healthy presence. I’m sure we’ll get a deeper look in time. Then we veer sharply left across an imposing and striking industrial bridge to find ourselves in an area with a totally different feel. Far more gentrified and seemingly quiet. For those who may want to live a little gentler but still be in and around Camden. Or not; also in the vicinity are Belsize Park, Hampstead and the satellite areas of Regents Park. Upmarket London. If you keep walking past Primrose Hill and beyond, you come to Lords Cricket Ground, the home of English cricket, and then Abbey Road studios. Spiritual home of a certain band you may have heard of. But we won’t dip our toes in any of those hallowed waters today. Instead, we take in the genteel environs of the neighbourhoods of Primrose Hill, then head back to deepest Camden. Oh, we were totally planning on walking up Primrose Hill itself. It offers views of London from around here rivalled only by Hampstead Heath – which I think has a better view. But this place is still a cool park to have nearby. But as we enter, a kind gentlemen stops us and says the place will be closing soon. Apparently they do that now. A pretty recent development. Oh well. Next time.

Day 24

Wednesday August 2

New Song Day. Oh I love New Song Day. Shall I tell you what it is? Not sure. Anyway, that’s what today is and me and Maja are deep in it and doing all the learning and all that kind of stuff. When Matt calls. Our friend Woodie has a gig tonight. Apparently he’s accompanying a couple of female singers in two different sets down a bar in Soho, just down the road from Ain’t Nothin But… We had plans to go to the gym. Oh, look at us. But NSD smashed straight into that. We were still thinking about it but, Soho night out. Strong willed individuals we are, we said of course we’d go. We’ll leave in 20. This being our first time downtown since we moved to Camden, this is a chance to see how long it takes door to door. Well, the bus stop is right out side our front door. The required bus wait time was two minutes. Just over 15 minutes after that we were pulling up right by Oxford Circus tube, a few minutes’ walk from the venue. So about 20 minutes. That was fun. 

Tonight’s gig is at a bar called The Coffee House. I’ve never been. I really should have. This is a great place. A really traditional English pub feel right in central London and they’re up for having this cool music event in here. And a load of Blues jam and general London music scene regulars have turned out. It’s just a full on general mingle. Me, Maja and Matt kind of coalesce every now and then, loosely around a table somewhere in the middle. And from that we keep shooting off in our own directions talking to him, talking to her, talking to them. Some of them we know, some of them we don’t. And one or two people I’m catching up with for the first time since late 2019. Yep. That four years give or take thing again. Inside, outside, front of stage, back of the bar. Oh, we’re just all over. No-one moreso than Maja. Probably no-one moreso than Maja in the whole place. She moves around effortlessly and effervescently chatting to just about everyone she feels like and everyone chats back. Some of them are on the music scene, some of them aren’t. Unlike me and Matt, she really doesn’t even know anyone round here just to see. Then she introduces me to a few people she’s connected particularly well to, and I chat to them too. This is how you do it. And we may also well be bumping into a few of tonight’s new people around the place in other London venues. Maybe even in here again. I think we’ll be back here. What a cool discovery. How did I never know about this place? And of course Woodie himself. Always good for a hang. And just brilliant at holding down those guitar parts and generally being a fantastic stage presence as he vibes with the girls who also give fantastic performances of pop and rock covers with just about the whole place getting involved and singing along. Just a real, total feelgood night. Then, when it’s all over and it’s time to say our goodbyes and leave, we’re home within half an hour. 

The London Diary: Camden, days 27 and 28

Day 27

Saturday August 5

We were initially thinking of leaving for Edinburgh today, but I suggested that Maja might not want to work Friday, then make the long drive immediately the next day. Good point, she says. So Sunday it is. But then we get to preparing today. Oh wow. How is there always so much to do? Seriously. It takes us almost the whole day. So much so that towards early evening, Maja is starting to suggest that maybe we even think about leaving Monday. No no no. We have this today. But it really is touch and go for a while there. Why and how is there always so much to do whenever we go away?

Day 28

Sunday August 6

Up, car packed, and out on the road by a little after 10am. Really not too bad at all. Now Maja gets a bit more of a look of the geography of the UK with a first hand perspective as we drive up the east side of the country and catch glimpses of some of the towns and cities as we pass them. Nottingham, Sheffield, Leeds. Then we’re closing in on Newcastle which we bypass with the city on our right. And there’s The Angel Of The North. The first time I’ve ever seen it.  The huge open armed statue welcoming you to the north east just as you’re coming to Gateshead, the city across the river from Newcastle. Past this, there are no other major settlements and you’re still another hour from the border. I really did not know this. But here we are now passing through the spectacular Northumberland National Park which, and I didn’t know this either, creates the natural border between Scotland and England. This is ridiculously hilly area. Almost roller-coaster like in its construction. Weeeee. We go down another hill after reaching a crest to discover a stomach rising drop. This makes each new rise a whole other adventure as you ponder the mystery of what might be on the other side. Weeeeee. Oh, that. Brilliant. Again. Let’s go again. And this is how we joyfully travel into Scotland where the scenery becomes even rougher, wilder, and more mountainous. All I can think about is what any prospective invading armies through the ages must have been thinking, having to march up and down all these hills before even beginning to engage with any enemy at the end of it all. You just wouldn’t bother would you? But it’s OK for us. We have the perfect music to accompany this wonderfully unfolding sight all around us as we drop in Slayer’s Reign In Blood album. Oh yes. This is what that was made for. Perfect wake you up music after a long countryside drive. Because yes, for some reason, digital maps and all that has seen us do most of this without the benefit of a motorway so it’s been fantastic scenery all the way. 

Through all this, we arrive in Edinburgh just before 9pm and begin threading towards our destination. The place we’re going to be calling home for the next two weeks or so. A multi-storey car park. It’s perfect. I’m really not messing. It’s indoors and out of the wind and rain, and even relatively warm – well, it is the height of summer, but it’s also Scotland so, you know. And it’s well lit. Until we find our spot, I totally hadn’t thought about this. The whole getting in and out of the car business, and maybe being all wet and stuff with rain lashing down on you while the wind has a go as well. Maja says she really had considered this. So yeah. This is a great idea, something she came up with a few days ago when talking to a colleague who knew Edinburgh. He said we should think about this place. A good price for 24 hour parking, CCTV so at least you have a burglar deterrent, and it’s bang in the centre of the city. And very close to the nationwide gym we became members of back in Camden for the very reason of wanting shower and other facilities here. 

We have a drive around the place  – it’s alarmingly full so it takes a while – and find the perfect spot that someone is just backing out of as we arrive. It feels almost built for us. Not just a parking space, but a parking space with walls either side of it. And natural light above with a street level grate just up there. We’re not backing onto another wall either. Nope. We’ve got an open barrier there, with another barrier a few feet across from it to the other side of the carpark with a bit of a drop between them. Which makes this back area feel private and open at the same time. Well, let’s get to it. Let’s turn this car into a home. Seats down, mattress unfurled, windows all covered with this fantastic magnet lined sheeting Maja found online. We have tiny torches tied to strategic areas inside, all our bags on the front seats and then cloth bags either side of the car inside for all the little daily nik-naks we might want to find instantly at any time. Shower and gym bags easily accessible in the front as well. We really are good to go in here. The car will now stay here and like this for our entire stay. That took about an hour. All settled, time to go out, and have a look at this city we’ve found ourselves in. We’re not massively looking to really get into the festival vibe, or really go on a voyage of discovery. There’ll be plenty of time for that over the next few weeks. Our mission now is just to find some food and then think about the after after. 

But even for the after, we really don’t have that many thoughts. We’re just planning on taking the festival in – maybe a show or two – hustling around bars and essentially, just being. The absolute ideal would be finding a bar we could play in more or less daily, but let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves here. One hustle at a time and see where it takes us. One of our thoughts is that we could fit in between different shows bars have to keep the vibe going. Anytime we play, we feel we only really need two or three songs to make an impact, then leave and next place. Really, one song is enough. Bang. Audience hit. Done. And with us having such a small setup, we’re confident we can find people who’ll be up for us doing our thing. 

While walking around we come across a bar called Whistle Binkies. This is one of the four bars we were recommended to try by the guy who suggested we come to Edinburgh in the first place. We’ve found our post dinner drinks place. Apart from anything else, it just looks immediately cool with the entry from the street being little more than a doorway. From there, it’s all downstairs and into an old style wooden floored cavernous area split in two. The large bar room, then a kind of threshold which is clearly curtained off at times, which leads to an equally large area with a big stage at the end. Yes. It appears we have stumbled into one of Edinburgh’s coolest grassroots venues. Even better, we see that they have an open mic tomorrow night. We ask the bar staff about it and are told the sign up time and also advised to be in early because there is a lot of demand for this one. Great. Noted. Will be done. Right. Show number one sorted.

Now it’s time to go home. Or, at least to the car. For the first night of actually sleeping in this arrangement we’ve made. It really is comfortable and cosy. Until we have one thought after a few pints. Yeah, we have already talked a little about this and have come prepared. We had some small bottles of water for the journey here and apparently they’re recyclable. Well, we’re about to recycle them in a slightly different way than was intended. Ladies and gentlemen. I introduce you to…the fun funnel. Like I said. We came prepared.

As we settle in for this first night of sleeping in the car, we know we are now on the verge. After all the talk, planning and then actually preparing, we have arrived and settled. We are full of anticipation for tomorrow. Would excitement be too far? Maybe, but oh go on then. We are about to do Edinburgh. One night’s sleep here and then it begins. We are about to announce ourselves to the current most happening entertainment hotspot in the world.

The London Diary: Camden, day 29

Day 29

Monday August 7

Maja wakes me with a start. We have to go to the gym. Now. No cosy slowly wakey time. No cup of tea – well, we couldn’t do that anyway. And no fun funnel. Because, well, it’s daytime now and there’s no fun funnelling in potential public. We’ve decided. So this is how we have to do this. We have to get up, get dressed and out. And go to the gym. Now. Right now. 

As we’ve now warmed up, so has the day, and we find we’ve planted ourselves right in the middle of everything, and it all resembles something of an urban Glastonbury. There are posters for various theatre and comedy shows everywhere, and every few minutes someone wants to put a flyer in your hand and tell you all about their show that starts in five minutes. Adding to the overall holiday-ee festivally vibe is the abundance of colourful street food trucks. As I’m taking all this in, Maja says something that ends up being an ominous foreshadowing. None of the posters overlap. We are about to embark on a day during which we will find out exactly what that means.

But first, and I really should have known this already, I’m stunned by how small Edinburgh is. I knew it was an anomaly in that it’s the capital of Scotland but not the biggest city – that’s Glasgow. But I had no idea how much smaller than Glasgow it was. Which is handy because it means we can take in pretty much the whole festival area in one substantial walking session. That’s a relief because we’ve had some quite destructive hustle sessions and were very conscious of using that experience considering the hustle here could last a few weeks. Don’t blow it in the first day or two. Maybe you remember the Dublin hustle we did last year while carrying all our gear the whole time. It took weeks to properly physically recover from that. This time we’ve decided not to take all our gear. We’re bringing the guitar for possible instant opportunities, but we’re not thinking of this as totally a Now Hustle. We think we can arrange things, so we can then pick up what we need from the car. We’ve even brought our full two speaker and backdrop set-up incase we manage to pull any slightly bigger shows. But out on the street, guitar aside, we’re not massively encumbered.

I’ve thought a lot about how to approach writing this next bit and have decided not to go through it all hustle by hustle.

I won’t name any venues because I’m sure they’re great and that the people we speak to are lovely, but they have absolutely no interest in engaging with us. We are met with something bordering on hostility. Polite and smiling it may be, but we very much feel it all the same. Seriously. We’ve done this in a whole bunch of countries and have mostly been met warmly, often even when being turned down, and as we’ve got better at all this, even the being turned down has reduced; we once did over 10 hustles in a row with a positive outcome; it may have possibly been 15 or so but we lost count. But here? In festival, live entertainment party land? It’s just harsh. And totally, totally closed. I’ve never encountered such closedness at all. Steel. Total steel. I struggle to find the right word but then I think I do. It’s as though we’re actually offending people by approaching them in this way and that we haven’t gone through the proper channels. Right. Give me the proper channels argument all you want. But if you do, you have to show me an act that ever got anywhere without some kind of cavalier attitude. Or attitude at all really. And really, is there anything out of line at all about coming to a festival – A FESTIVAL – thinking you can hustle a little?

To that, we discover that the big sin we’ve committed is to have not booked with the official festival organiser who would then have assigned us bars and shows. Or something like that. That’s it. If you haven’t got themselves on their lists, your name’s not down and you are definitely, absolutely, not coming in. I’m doing it again and I’m not apologising. We’re at a festival. An actual festival. With almost every bar having entertainment. But we’ve never encountered such a totally closed, ‘No’, environment. Nothing even comes close. We were warned – almost to the point of verbal violence – about attempting what we did in Ireland. Smashed it. We were told, with no intransigence whatsoever, that what we wanted to do would be totally impossible in The Hague. We played four shows in the one day we were there. But here. In the current centre of the universe of live entertainment and free spirit. Our names are not down and we are totally not welcome to come in. As we get rejection after rejection, barely able to get our pitch out, we take each one with good grace and move onto the next. Again. We’ve learned this from experience. You will be rejected. Sometimes people will even be horrible. Try not to take it personally, thank them for their time and move to the next one with no lingering feeling of resentment. For a start and in all fairness, they owe you nothing and you’re smashing into their day and time with no invitation or welcome whatsoever. So I totally get it. Second, the next hustle is brand new. It all starts again and must be met with all the positivity with which you attempted on that last horrible one which tried to smash all positivity out of you. Believe me. I’ve felt it. Gone out onto the street all angry indignation. It’s not conducive to good vibes and a continuing good hustle day. And no, I’m still not totally impervious and may well have those moments again but we’ve got better. And I’ve got to say, that if nothing else, our experience here today shows we really have got better at this as we leave each venue with a renewed spring in our step, and are able to shake off most of any bad feeling before even reaching the door. How’s that for taking the positives out of such a day? But the weight does begin to, well, weigh. We do get the one tiniest bit of a something when we hustle the guy who owns Whistle Binkies when we unwittingly try to hustle another bar he owns. He says the bar we’re in right now is mainly a sports bar and that all the music happens in WB, where he’s happy to hear that we’re playing tonight. He then points us in the direction of an outside venue and says they could be receptive. We go across the road and do our thing and are told the manager isn’t around but could well be happy to hear from us tomorrow. But when we look back at the place we’ve just approached, we conclude it would be at best a background music gig. Not one for the three or four song all balls and energy blast we would be offering. We will not be returning here.

For all our water-off-a duck’s-back-ness, around 5pm we take a break and sit down somewhere to get something to eat. We joylessly chew on burgers that are probably good but, well, who cares, and with something approaching reluctant incredulity, conclude, there’s just no point being here. We are totally wasting our time. We have totally wasted our time. And an enormous amount of effort and charged up positivity and invested energetic excitement. We look at each other and the same thought is just spontaneously there. As obvious as if we’d both just fallen into the same pond. Let’s leave. Let’s play our open mic at Whistle Binkies tonight, then just leave Edinburgh tomorrow. After all that planning and organisation. And yes, anticipatory excitement. I’m repeating myself a little bit now but I couldn’t care less. This has just been the absolute biggest let down and waste of time and effort I think The Diaries have ever been involved in. Listen up everyone. We’re having a festival of entertainment. A wonderful, chaotic, free spirited enterprise. A mecca for entertainers – or so I’ve read it so described at least once. Come one and all. But if you even think about not organising before you get here, just don’t bother. We don’t want your sort here. Fine. We’re getting our coats. 

Oh, another one on that proper channels thing. These things are all email and/or online application. We’ve done so many emails and applications and 99 point whatever decimal you want to put in here, no-one ever gets back. Not even people who have specifically requested an email. I’m not saying we’ll never email anyone again, but most of the time by this stage I don’t. I think this is something we just have to do ourselves. Hence the Now Hustling. As different and as lively and as effective a live force as we are, and with the songs to match, not to mention the track record, the world just sees another acoustic guitar/songwriter act, and goes, ‘Great. Just what we need. Another one.’ 

OK. Back with it. If not Edinburgh, then what? Well, before we’d even thought of this we’d been talking about possibly doing a tour of Scotland. We’re here now. Why not do that? Right back to the original plan. Brilliant. Yep. Maja says she’s always wanted to see the famous Loch Ness, around four hours drive from here. So that’s the vague plan. Head up that way, maybe stop and hustle and stay in the vicinity of a venue or two. The apex of the trip will be the enormous Loch Ness, around which we’ll spend a few days maybe. The big plan in all this is to do something we never quite managed in Ireland. Take a trip to an island. A really small one with just one pub. Hustle that pub and of course hopefully play there. Then the trip will be truly replete. Then start to make our way back to London, maybe breaking the trip up into a few more hustle days as we pick our way through a different route through Scotland to the one that brought us to Loch Ness. But before any of that, we have our open mic at Whistle Binkies.

This planning of a tour has been a lovely way to use the time between deciding we were no longer doing Edinburgh to arriving at the time to head off to whatever tonight is going to bring us. We’ve also been intermittently texting with our Edinburgh friend and he says he thinks he’ll make it down tonight. Not only does he totally come through with that, but he brings a huge surprise. One of Maja’s London colleagues, and a guy I’ve also hung out with, who just happens to be a massive music fan and who also just happens to be in Edinburgh right now. Amazing. So, me and Maja have got ourselves on the list. We’re going to be first, as soon as the full live band finishes, which is warming up the room very nicely. While that’s happening, the four of us hang back and hang out in the bar area. Then, when the band finishes we make our way to somewhere near the front of the stage area.

A little after 10pm and the open mic begins as sound technician and open mic organiser Nico calls us to the stage. This is a similar setup to what we experienced that time in Hamburg when again the event was run by a sound engineer. That guy pretty much kept himself to sound duties and just told people when it was there time to go up and had very little involvement with on-stage duties. You know, saying nice things about the act coming up or going off. Engaging with the crowd. That sort of thing. No. That wasn’t that guy’s sort of thing. And neither is it Nicos. But he does run a very tight open mic, and you can see he’s really running around to make it work the best it can, and then he really, really makes sure the stage and any act on it has the best sound possible. As a result, if you’re just casually watching, it just seems as though things are magically running themselves extremely smoothly with no hitches and a great sound. There’s a reason it appears like that and his name is Nico. From somewhere out in the room – I only hear him through the monitors, I have no idea where he is, he runs us through a quick on stage sound check. Here, I smash the guitar like I mean it. This is no basic line check. This is someone who has no idea what we sound like so he has to be given a solid representation of what he’ll have to work with. So I just hit that E chord hard and rhythmically. Already people are starting to take notice with some even moving a little to what I’m playing. Is that anticipation I see? Maybe. Afterall, the room is packed. This is Edinburgh. And the two people on stage have never been here before, are facing a roomfull of festival strangers and acting like they live in here. That kind of confidence makes an audience feel confident. They know that, whatever is about to come out of those speakers, the people about to do it look like they know what they’re doing. They’re not yet fully on our side, but they look like they would like to be. That still depends on us taking that final transaction over the line by giving them something they can get behind. We’ve come prepared. We’re going to begin with one of our what we’ve come to call Room Owners. We have a lot of them by now. Songs that make you sweat. Then a good number of mid tempo bouncers, a few real strong singer/songwritery sing alongers, and a handful of slow laid backers. Tonight we’re going for two Room Owners. We’re going to open with Make Me Shine, then we’re going to hit them with I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). 

Make Me Shine is just a pummeler, smasherer of a song. One that people joyfully allow to pound them to the floor and hold them there. At first we think we’re going to just hit it out straight away. There’s no count in to this one. Just Maja shouting ‘Go!’ Then straight into the enormous, celebratory chorus followed by its infections singalong chant. An instant double chorus really with vocals and guitar immediately all in at the same time. Like you’re dropped straight into the middle of a song that didn’t want to wait an extra split second for you to get comfortable. Oh, you weren’t ready? Too late. It’s already happening and you’re here with absolutely no say in the matter. So yeah, we don’t go straight into it. Instead, Maja decides she wants to say something. The crushing disappointment of a closed city has meant that we can now claim the kudos of having traveled all the way here from London and then slept in the car purely for the purpose of playing this open mic tonight. And Maja uses every bit of it. Just mentioning the fact that we have come from London tonight pulls up a huge cheer. We haven’t played a note and she has made them already ours. ‘Go!’ And we’re off and the crowd is truly and instantly launched. We’ve started on the stage – we did have a bit of a discussion about whether to do that or not – but by the time we reach chorus part two we’re heading out onto the floor to get right into the whites of our audience’s open and eager eyes. By now we have people clapping along and it seems the people out there are starting to crowd in a little more. Oh yes. We have them. There are huge smiles from people with that smile being part bemusement, part entertainment, part, what the hell is happening here, all, oh balls to it, I’m in. And, somewhere in there, they also appear to say, ‘I can’t quite believe this is happening.’ And all among it, people are looking around and seeming to say, ‘Are you getting this too?’ With all that going on, of course when we finish the eruption is spontaneous and deafening. Yes. They were with us. Yes. They are with us now. And yes, they will go with us wherever we decide to go next. Edinburgh is famous for having some of the fiercest grassroots crowds you could ever find. We have walked right into the middle of one and come out with it totally in our hands. It is ours. Again, we were going to smash straight from one song to the other. Instead, Maja decides to do the talky thing again. People are still clapping and cheering when she begins. When she again says, ‘We are The Diaries,’ a cheer goes up again. She strides straight into the middle of the room that she now indisputably owns and declares, ‘We have one more song coming up. Then: ‘So, we traveled all the way here from London yesterday. We slept in our car. We decided. We’re. Doing. Edinburgh. I hope you appreciate it.’ With that, a cheer rises up again. ‘We’ve got two songs. And we’re so happy to be here. The cheer rises higher, with Maja raising a triumphant fist and letting out a cry to join it. Me: ‘Here we go.’ Guitar: ‘One two…one two three four…’ Maja: ‘I. Got something to say to you.’ And we’re off. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Halfway through the first chorus and we’re in among the crowd again. With that, I leave her to command centre room while I go out and play right in front of some of the people right at the back, moving around the room and almost from person to person as I do so. She then comes out to meet me and we play just to ourselves there at the back of the room, almost ignoring the audience and seeing only each other as everyone else just watches us do that, knowing they are now the backdrop to us, almost an actual part of the show they are, at the same time, watching. Into the second chorus and people are actually spontaneously screaming out. I mean, really screaming. Then the most magical moment comes. As we fly out of that last chorus and instantly put the brakes on to go into gentle mode. With that, the whole place melts in cheers and applause as they continue to ride our wave. Now I return to the stage, which is all of a sudden the private place to be, as Maja soaks up every last bit of attention in the centre of everybody and everything. Outside and right now, I think the entire Edinburgh Festival is revolving around what we are doing in this room. Then there’s the launch into the second part of the final verse. More screams and more faces of sheer delight and glee. People are even laughing in disbelief, some almost bouncing randomly. Just, how am I supposed to react to this written all over their faces. This is a totally unknown act that has been thrust into their worlds, and all they are seeing is, well, stars. Fully formed. Right in front of their eyes, walked in right out of the Edinburgh night. Then we end. A final shout of I like you better when you’re naked. Then the room truly explodes as people scream to the ceiling as high as they can and the applause goes on and on and on and people keep pulling all their spent breath in and screaming again. Two songs. We’ve been up there less than six minutes. In that time we’ve owned everything and this has been everything we could possibly have wanted from Edinburgh. All the planning, the journeying, the car-ing, the not caring. It’s all been totally worth it because we got to come up to Scotland, right into the middle of Edinburgh festival and do this. We have just put a huge Diary sized mark on the place and I think it’s going to last. When we leave here, our imprint will stay. Only one show. Only two songs. Only six minutes. But yes, we really have out of all of it, pulled out exactly what we came here to do. And have the video that shows it all thanks to our Edinburgh friend who does an amazing job of capturing what we have done here tonight.

Maja finishes by saying that we’re going to be around. And that we are. We go and join our friends who now have somewhere else to be, so it’s a goodbye and thankyou very much as well. As we approach them they are looking at us with a new wonder. They had faith in us I’m sure, but they had no idea that was coming. Last time we were chatting to them, less than ten minutes ago, we were Mark and Maja, two people who apparently fancied themselves as some kind of songwriters. Oh OK. On you go. Aw, ain’t they cute? Now we have returned as stage warriors. As conquerors of Edinburgh. The pivot around which all else turns right now. As we’re talking to them and, indeed, making our way to them, we can barely move a second pace without another congratulatory handshake or back pat. And having said our goodbyes and plonked ourselves gratefully and still breathlessly at the bar, a guy comes up to us who has a lot more to say than well done. He does that too of course, but then his voice goes serious and he says, ‘We need you.’ Which I take to mean – and the course of the subsequent conversation proves me right – that we, the wider world and society in general needs The Diaries. You can Not stop. He says. You Can Not Stop. It may be hard, you may get doors slammed in your face but you absolutely have to keep on going. Wow. Thankyou. We will. There’s no anyone inviting anyone to join anyone. Instead, the three of us kind of spontaneously settle in all together at the bar. And a new part of the evening begins. Through this, he tells us that we are totally new and far ahead of anything anyone else is doing. But, critically, he says, we are not so far ahead of our time as to be over the other side where no-one else can see it or understand it. That is so important, he says. I know what he’s talking about. There are legends who were ahead of their time, never appreciated in their time, and now so revered we can’t imagine a world in which they didn’t exist. But in their world, they almost might as well not have. I’m sure you can come up with your own person or act who could fit into that. No. He says we are out there on the edge. But, very importantly, on the right side of it. Where what we are doing can be seen and understood, and also still have a relation to where we’re coming from. 

Going right back to the early days of Mark’s Diaries, I used to write about all my fantastic encounters and people who would promise this that or whatever the other thing might be. Then, nothing. So I stopped writing about those encounters, deciding I would return to mention them should the thing they spoke about happen, then I could go back in time and talk about the beginning of where it happened. I’m going to break that rule now and say that this guy, who’s been around music a long time himself, tells us he knows of a kind of traveling entertainment setup that we would just fit right into. It sounds something like a circus but without the circus. I can’t quite tell you what it is because I don’t fully understand it myself, but he says he can make a call or two and get us on that particular radar. Brilliant. Why not. And if nothing happens, that could have nothing to do with him. All he can do is make the call. A few days later, with our video of tonight having been sent to him, he says he has. Thankyou very much. Can’t ask for more than that. I’m writing this exactly a month later. September 7 to this day’s August 7. Still heard nothing, and if we don’t, no harm at all. But what a wonderful encounter with someone who has connected with us on such a level. And after all the door slamming we’ve experienced while being here, here is someone who believes The Diaries are important. The Diaries are needed. We, the world, society, needs The Diaries.

With that, the newly anointed most important new band in the whole world goes off to have a date with the fun funnel. We have other parts of the world to visit tomorrow. Tomorrow, the second part of this chapter begins.

For that video, go here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_aNeDdOETg

The London Diary: Camden, days 30 to 77

Day 30

Tuesday August 8

We come out of our morning gym session and are on our way to the car when Maja suggests we just go home instead of driving round Scotland for the next 10 days or so. Sure. Why not? Maybe we can work on the album. Or start gigging properly around Camden and London. Not a bad replacement. So that’s what we do. We turn the car back into a car again, and then we’re off. 

Lunch is a fantastic spot in the small town of Jedburgh right across the road from its spectacular abbey ruins. Then it’s into a charity shop there to buy a few books and then out on the road again. The next stop is the border. We just have to. We get out of the car here into a very windy parking area with the Scottish flag on one side and the English flag on the other, both seeming to compete for which one can rip itself from its pole first. They’re still battling to a score draw by the time we leave. While there, we delight in walking from one country to the other quite a few times. And of course we have to stop and take in the incredible views of nothing but rough and rolling hills all the way to any horizon. After that, it’s time to get back to chasing our horizons.

Day 31

Wednesday August 9

Recovery day. Most of it is spent reading the books we bought in Jedburgh. We bought five. I’ve chosen to read the one about a guy who spent the second world war escaping from POW camps. Maja’s reading a book about international espionage. We didn’t delve into any of these books when we bought them. In the foreword of my book, the author talks about going on a journey to meet one of his sources – at the Edinburgh festival. Maja’s book contains a character who works for Camden council, and has another who lives in Kentish town, where we both lived before our move to Ireland. Even more specifically, that character lives behind Kentish Town station. Which is where I lived when I first properly landed in London. Damn. For that initial ridiculous drama, I refer to you to Mark’s Diaries.

Day 32

Thursday August 10

Oh dear. Maja is starting to feel sick. No idea where that came from. I don’t develop anything. She’s not majorly bad, mainly a sore throat and not much of a voice, certainly not if she really tries to push it. So yeah. For a vocalist intending to do some recording and maybe the odd gig here and there, that’s bad enough. That’s a bit like me getting a papercut on a finger. A minor irritation, if that, for most people. A potential out of action injury for me. And so Maja is. Out of action. Yeah. 

On the drive back we concluded that our overall plan was very basic. Get back to the album and work to get that completed, open mics, and out and about socially in Camden. But with Maja unable to sing and not much more able to talk, nothing much is happening on any of these fronts.

Day 58

Tuesday September 5

Yeah. We’ve fast forwarded all the way to September. Not much happened in August. Just hot hot hot as well. We imagined doing a gig in that heat a few times and we were just, no. We did have an experience in Berlin once playing in very hot weather. Not nice. Not nice at all. So we didn’t really push it. 

There are a few nights out though, the most memorable being a night in The Good Mixer when we get deep into conversation with a guy who’s been around for a long time. He’d seen us around and in here and was curious about us. He loved our story and what we’re doing here and invited us to join him at The Dublin Castle. Great. We were expecting a pint or two with some friends of his. Nope. Straight to the back of the bar and into the live music venue where entry was £15. Not for us. He got waved straight through. Then said, ‘They’re with me.’ In we went too. For a really fantastic punk type band in London from Germany. So yeah. We’re now meeting random people out and about who invite us to cool gigs for free.

And Maja’s also been following in the footsteps of Amy Winehouse and playing pool in The Good Mixer. I’ve not yet made it onto the table myself; unlike Maja, I’ve been put off the queue to play, which can be so long. I think I should just get over that.

Day 69

Friday September 15

This has been on the cards for a long time. Probably since around February when we first realised what we had after a casual listen to a gig from a few months before. I’ll go straight with the headline first. Today we push the button on our first EP. Five songs recorded live in November. At that gig we did at The Canal Turn in Ballymahon. Which resulted from what we thought had been a totally disastrous gig in Athlone. This week we finally got round to downloading it properly from the phone recording and importing that into our studio software so that we could begin the process of, well, processing it. It really is just a basic phone recording of a bar gig. So yeah, we really had to work hard to get it sounding as good as we’ve been able to. What came out at the end of it all was a great look at what the NOW hustles were all about and how they were received. This, for us, is our document of what we achieved in Ireland from scratch with our own songs and our own hit the street and just do it mentality.

The people in the bar that night had no idea we were coming, didn’t know us in any way, and had never heard any of our songs. For that, we would suggest that the audience reaction is the sixth track. People can listen to the songs, yes, and that is really important. But we are also now putting out what our songs and performance do to a room full of people experiencing us for the very first time. And not even a musical audience at that; these are not people who had gone out to see some unknown act with their minds open and expectant. These are people who had just gone down their local for some banter with their mates and then two people came in to play them a bunch of songs they’d written themselves. What happened next? Well, it’s now all there for everyone to see what usually happens whenever we just roll in and pop up. 

The tracklisting:

0:00 I Like You (Better When You’re Naked)

2:50: Six Sense Lover

5:49: Make Me Shine

8:31: Rock’n’Roll Tree

11:40: How You Rock’n’Roll

It’s now on around 30 platforms, including Spotify, which is here:

And here on Youtube:

Day 70

Saturday September 16

After pushing the button yesterday, the EP is now up and live on a few platforms and will be coming up on others over the next few days. Around 30 in all through an online distributor. Apart from that, we are now talking about producing vinyl copies of it as well. Of course we could sell these at gigs, but our main thinking here is to get them into bars and cafes and other places that play vinyl as part of their appeal. A few ifs here, but if they do and if any kind of traction results in a given venue, we prospectively have a place to play with an expectant and ready made audience.

We also push the first button on something else quite significant today. Building a Japanese audience. We’ve been speaking about this for a while. Maja speaks fluent Japanese. Really; people speaking to her without images think she is Japanese. This is a part of our toolkit we’ve been keeping dry for a while, but now, with our first real product out there, it’s time. General livestreams in English will also be happening, but the initial focus right now is Japan. The medium we’re going to use is the livestream through a Japanese platform Maja knows well from her time in Japan. Another bunch of ifs, but if we’re able to build any kind of audience in this way, it could make a Japanese tour viable. We’re under no illusion that this is any kind of quick fix, if it could even be a fix at all. But we’re starting. Then, all we can do, as with anything else, is to keep on and keep on. 

This begins late morning as we set ourselves up in our front room. Maja in front and me behind and off to the side. We bought a cool Camden tube station cushion cover a few weeks ago so that’s on display too. The next idea is to get a big Camden poster and use that as a backdrop. We know exactly what we want. There’s a bridge, right in the centre of Camden, which is adorned with faux graffiti stating: Camden Lock. That’s in reference to the lock of the canal which flows through the area. The actual lock is right inside Camden Market. That bridge and its logo is the backdrop we want.

The live stream is an enormous, exhilarating, joyful success. Although we’re only in our living room, from the very start we perform it as though it’s a gig. It’s late morning here, Saturday night there. Our audience peaks at around 40 with people coming and going, so our total audience is more than that. But what really makes it is the level of engagement and enthusiasm from those who find us, and a healthy number do stay from the moment they find us until the end. In between songs there are sometimes long stretches of conversation as Maja responds to comments that have come in during the songs. Then real time questions and thoughts come in as she speaks and she engages with them too. She introduces me as well, of course, but I generally just stand there and try to look charming. Or rockstar. Or whatever you can look like in your living room on a Saturday morning/afternoon. But yeah. As it goes on, we really do play into the occasion and as the audience involvement increases, that feeling that we are actually playing a live show only gets stronger. The live interactive element is a bit special. All questions and comments are written, and once complete are voiced by whatever female robot does those voices. So during a song, the stream can suddenly start speaking to us. And the other usual emoticon type things you can see during live videos such as love hearts and applause emoticons. We do this for an hour in two chunks of 30 minutes, as that’s the longest single stream you can do. At the end of it we are totally spent. You could say we’ve left it all on the living room floor.

The rugby world cup’s on and we’ve just done a gig. So we’ve done everything. Bar? Why not? The nearest place to us can be seen from the front door to our building. So off we go. Gig at home then off to the bar. Doesn’t it normally go the other way round?

Day 72

Monday September 18

Are we expecting big numbers from the EP? It would be nice but we’re really not. Not straight away anyway. It’s just important and great that we finally have something out there that we can point people to. It’s also a massively significant moment to finally have something we can use to announce to media outlets that we exist. So this week the push will begin to try to get some radio play, at whatever level, and whatever could possibly lead on from that. Then it will be on to more general music media as well. Blogs, podcasts, online magazines, real magazines, newspaper culture/entertainment guides. All of the above local, national and international. Maybe even TV. You just have to keep pushing. It really is an ongoing process, you just have to keep going. We have a story, we have a show, we have the stage presence, and we have the songs. If anything, we think that as much as we are trying to get in touch with these people, they are also on the constant lookout for something like us. It’s just that they’re bombarded with so much all the time, it’s so hard to pick out the sounds from the noise. They’re well aware of that too. All we can do, as I said above, is just keep on keeping on. I don’t think I’ll Diary too much of us putting stuff out. Just assume it’s constantly going on.

Back to the beginning. Do we think The NOW Hustle EP is going to be a hit and make our fame and fortune? No. Do we think it’s a good representation and product with the potential to take us to another level? Maybe not even the next level, but just another level? Yes. Absolutely.

One of its biggest values is that it demonstrates the kinds of shows we were doing during our time in Ireland and again, like I said an entry or two ago, we really have captured the sound of the types of shows were playing and what we can do to an audience.

The document we have produced and delivered is live. And alive. We have supreme confidence in our product and our project. It is ready. The album is also on the way and in pretty good, solid shape for where we are with it. So until we’re ready to push the button on that, The NOW Hustle EP is a great prototype.

Day 77

Saturday September 23

Second Japanese stream today and this time we get over 100 people in for our hour long show. This is just amazing live practice as well. Today’s show felt more fluid and just easier to play than last week’s. Because, let’s face it, we really haven’t been playing live that much lately and we definitely felt it last week, even if it might not have been visible to anyone. One of the most common questions today is, ‘Are these really your own songs and not covers?’ And yes, Maja has to say quite a few times, no. These are not covers. They really are our own originals. I don’t speak Japanese but I learn today that Japanese uses the English word original, at least in this context. And I hear Maja say it a lot.

The London Diary: Camden, day 131

Day 131

Thursday November 16

It’s been a game changing time.

Before we get to that, as far as I’m aware, this is the single longest period I’ve ever gone without writing or putting up any Diary at all. And that’s going right back to the beginning of Mark’s Diaries, which started in the summer of 2014. Damn. Over nine years ago. It may be a little more while before posting, as right now we’re at just under eight weeks since the last entry of September 23. Then, apart from the fantastic Japanese live streams, the last actual live show we played was that momentous open mic in Edinburgh on August 6. Well over three months ago. That night, we were told by an ecstatic audience member that we absolutely could not stop. He said we had created our own genre at the very edge of pop music and that we had to keep getting out and playing as much as we could. However, for one reason or another, and none by our design we totally did stop after that. At least as far as getting out live was concerned.

So, what’s been going on? There are a few spots to hit, but first, Maja went away to Sweden for a visit towards the end of September. Then a week or so later her company announced a huge round of layoffs and she was caught up in that and made redundant. Job she came to London with, gone.

This job had been the sole reason she had been able to secure a visa to be able to live here in the first place as the company had sponsored her on a skilled workers visa. To get another job, she had to find an employer who would take on that sponsorship. That is a very very narrow field, so this really was what the hell next territory. Of course, while that scramble was going on, all Diaries and Diary activity instantly ceased. With Maja’s work being so specialised and at such a high level, this isn’t like someone losing a bar or restaurant job and simply walking into some other place and more or less starting the next day, kind of like I did a few times in London. No. These things are whole processes taking weeks.

As I’m sure you can imagine, all kinds of twists, turns and uncertainties followed. In the middle of it all came a momentous development on the complete opposite end of the emotion scale. 

Maja applied for and was granted an unmarried partner visa. First, this meant that she could now accept any job at all with or without sponsorship. Second, for the first time in London, this now makes The Diaries a very real possibility as a going concern in the UK with us now being able to fully pursue any potential commercial opportunities or ventures as and when they arise. Which means we can now totally target The Diaries as a full time deal for both of us. A huge ask in any circumstances of course, but an absolute impossibility without that particular visa. In the meantime, all is back on the rails again.

Third momentous event, which kind of had to happen really for us to be able to keep doing this, but still. Yes, Maja does indeed now have another job in the same high tech field as the last one, meaning The Diaries are now ready to be go again. And it was the new visa that made that appointment possible.

In among all that, first one of us and then the other got sick. Not massively badly, just annoyingly persistent, and for over two weeks. At the time of writing  – November 16 – Maja’s voice is still nowhere match fit but we’re getting there and will be hitting the hustle trail as soon as we feel up to speed again. At and around the same time, live streams will be up and running again too. Some in Japanese, some in English. We’ll let you know.

The London Diary: Camden, days 176 to 196

Day 176

Sunday December 31

OK. Reconnect time. Again. Let’s start with New Years Eve, because it is. Our names are down for the private, regulars only night at The Marquis, one of our most regular central bars. A recap about this place which is just by Trafalgar Square. I played there every month for over three years with Dan in The Insiders and me and Maja have played there a few times now and been quite a few more. When we walk in tonight, it’s already packed and there’s a live cover duo playing. Our friends Nathan and Tony. They all but stop playing to announce over the microphone, ‘Oh look who it is.’ As entrances go for New Years, not bad.

After that, what an amazing night and just the best way to bring in 2024.

Day 190

Sunday January 14 

The last time we played anything at all was back towards the end of September when we did the Japanese live stream. Damn. Just did a count and disbelieved it so much I had to do a recount. That’s 16 weeks ago. Essentially four full months. Longer than we had to wait to begin when we first arrived in London. As for actual live performances, you’re going back to August 6 and Edinburgh, a further seven weeks. So as of today, you’re looking at 22 weeks since we last played live. Oh damn. Even between Ireland and London, the times between our last and first performances were December 19 and March 9 respectively. Just 11 weeks. Oh dear. Exactly half the time of where we are now.

OK. But we’re on it. I’m sure you’ll be pleased to know we’re getting back to this now. It begins today.

Without any forethought, as morning turns to afternoon, we’re just like, let’s get back into it with a Youtube livestream. We have no expectations of audience. Nothing is being announced. Hell, we’ve only just announced it to ourselves. Really, we’re seeing it as a reconnect rehearsal, but with songs we’re very familiar with so we should still be in sight of a performance so yeah, put it out, and why not live? And even if just one person shows up, we still have a new video.

Well first, we totally double our expectations. Two people show up. Which is actually a good thing because our performance is so far below where we thought we would be at. We weren’t expecting fully stellar, but we thought this material would be familiar enough that we’d be able to slot right back into it, but no. You still need to build that stuff up again before going public and this has been a bit of a wake up call. We were planning on tentatively starting our hustle again this Tuesday. That ain’t happening now. Time to strip ourselves back and get ourselves back in the rehearsal room so to speak. And privately.

Day 191

Monday January 15

Matt gets in touch to ask how the stream went and we’re honest about it. He was one of the two so now we just have to find out who the other person was. He reckons we’re being a bit hard on ourselves. Apparently, from viewer perspective it really wasn’t that bad. OK. Maybe a lot of it was in our heads, but we were making mistakes we wouldn’t expect to make and that meant that the overall assuredness just wasn’t there so we never really felt relaxed into it. Which made it feel all, wrong. From which you can project a whole memory of performance. Maybe that’s it, I don’t know. Also, with so much live experience, we do automatically just plough through when things go wrong so mistakes and slips can very quickly get swallowed up and they’re gone before the audience even knew they were there. But we felt it and when you’re assuredness isn’t totally clicking, that translates to actual physical performance which gets held back, and you know something just isn’t right because it simply doesn’t feel right. But yeah, stuff like that might not get picked up on at all by a casual observer, or even by a musician as experienced as Matt. We tell him we’re holding back on live just a little while we knock off the rust and he says we should come and play a few songs at his show this Friday. He has a duo with our mutual friend Herman, who actually made the invitation to us through Matt. They have a semi regular gig at a bar in Leyton, east London. This sounds like a perfect place to soft relaunch ourselves. Yep. We’ll be there. Thankyou very much. It also gives us a target to aim at.

We were already on it, but having a gig to be ready for in a few days’ time means we won’t slacken off with a ‘we’ll be ready when we’re ready’ attitude. We have to be ready. We have a deadline. Even before Matt had got in touch, we had done our first lunchtime rehearsal. That happened earlier today when we gently reconnected with the material. 

Day 192

Tuesday January 19

I won’t itemise each rehearsal but it’s worth commenting on our thoughts today. Which is that we’re aiming at having six songs totally consolidated and ready to choose from for Friday. We really expect to play two, possibly one more, or three then possibly one more. Beyond those six we’re consolidating for now, once we get past the weekend and into more rehearsal, we expect a lot of songs to come back quite quickly. Then there are a whole bunch of new songs, some of which we’ve already messed about with, and others that we know quite well but just haven’t fully played too much together yet. That lot can wait. Now is not the time to be road testing them or throwing them out live when we barely know them ourselves. Stick to what we know and stick to what we know works.

Day 195

Friday January 19

Here we go. Back into it. At The Coach And Horses, Leyton High Street, east London. This is a few stops south on the tube’s Northern Line towards the centre to Tottenham Court Road station, then change to travel out east on the Central Line to Leyton. The plan for tonight is for Matt and Herman to play two sets of around 45 minutes each with us fitting more or less into the break.

I actually saw them, and in this venue, just a few days before Christmas. Not only do they play a very crowd pleasing covers set but they are technically absolutely fantastic with great vocal harmonies. A brilliant cover duo with two acoustic guitars. To be expected really. Matt is a total pro on guitar with a huge amount of experience fronting bands as a guitarist/ vocalist while Herman is a virtuoso violinist and multi-instrumentalist. I’d never seen him play guitar until last week, but it seemed like the most natural thing in the world and I never questioned it. When I played with them both in a jazz band way way back, they would often burst into spontaneous Beatles songs. Just vocally, but harmonising was right there and effortless. We never explored that territory in our project. It was talked about but we just never got round to it. But here they are now. Fully formed and sounding every bit as amazing as I thought they would.


This is what we settle into as showtime arrives at 8pm and they take to the stage and do their thing. The bar is nicely busy and the guys get steadily applauded throughout the set. It’s a slightly strange set up though. The stage is just floor space really, on floor level. That’s usual enough at these types of gigs. What’s strange is that it’s kind of off to the side so the performers are sideways facing to most of the bar to their left. To their right is the restaurant area but there’s a wall between that and the stage part, and they’re a little apart from things anyway. The sound is fantastic though. One of the best I’ve seen in a small to mid size cover venue with speakers everywhere carrying the show to all corners. Although they are at the side, they do still have an audience to play to as many of their friends have come giving them their own private audience of eight people. Quite handy moral support.

Then it’s our turn. We’re given two songs. Great. That totally works. We plug in our wireless and now we’re not bound by the stage at all. We’re just all over this place and just a few bars into our opener, I Like You (Better When You’re Naked), it’s clear we have them. People are rocking, watching, smiling. And yes, cheering through the stops and restarts. Straight away we’re in to Make Me Shine, which is just a huge sounding song with a massive singalong chanted chorus. Out beyond left stage is the big expanse of the main bar and I sweep right through into that while Maja commands centre stage, most notably the large double table immediately to the left side of the stage. We finish that song to massive cheers, then we have one more song to play. We’d planned for this and don’t hesitate as we plunge straight into relative newie Talk About The Weather, which comes with an extended a capella section which this bar just fully embraces. We finish this one to a huge whooping reception too and feel we have made this night ours. Sorry lads but, special guests or not, we were always going to do what we do. There was to be no holding back. But you know what? Hold back with original songs in front of a chilled Friday night cover night crowd and you might as well stay held back. The only way you even get through this without being ignored is to front it, throw every hat you have into the ring then storm it like you own it. And that’s exactly what we’ve done. I’ve got to say, I felt a little edgy coming here tonight. We were putting ourselves on the line again. In London and in front of a coverband crowd baying for the hits. Play what we know. And after last Sunday. This really was get back on the horse territory. In the wild wild east. Tame the horse, ride it and own it. And we have.

As Matt and Herman thank us and start up their show again, we get down to the business of going round and handing out cards and beer mats. Hands reach out to take them and the cheers keep pouring in. As well as money. We are not hustling here and there is no hat. But that doesn’t stop someone from insisting on giving Maja a tenner. In the middle of all this, one guy tells us he feels he’s just had a night out on our three songs alone. While another says it was like experiencing an hour of live music in ten minutes.

Yes. This is about as good a return to live performance as we could possibly have hoped for and the unsuspecting and unexpecting crowd has completely embraced us. Matt and Herman, thankyou.

Day 196

Saturday January 20

This next statement might seem bizarre, but I ran it by Maja before writing it here. After initially being thrown by it, she stopped to think and then was like, ‘You know what, I agree.’ 

What we did last night feels like it was our first real London show; up till last night, practically everything we’d done in London had been either open mic or open mic related. Apart from maybe one show, The Reliance in Shoreditch. On the cold Now Hustle night we played, there was barely anyone there and three of them were almost performatively hostile to us. Although to be fair, we did impress the main man Mario and indeed could possibly, possibly have built something with him if he hadn’t been going on holiday almost immediately after. And you may remember that one person did come and talk to us and was massively encouraging and enthusiastic. But if anything, the most we can call that is a successful live audition that we didn’t quite follow through on, mostly due to the move to Camden.

Oh. OK. If you follow us closely and your memory is really sharp, The White Hart. But please let’s not include that one as we never stood a chance of being able to call that a show; so quiet did we have to be in a massively packed place, and so disinterested was practically the whole bar that anyone was even playing. 

So yeah. Me and Maja are in agreement on this one so you have to be too. Last night was our first real London show.

The London Diary: Camden, days 197 to 199

Day 197

Sunday January 21

Just a little mention of a couple of out and abouts as today we take a trip to Kenwood House on the far side (from us) of Hampstead Heath. This is a wonderfully cosy trip through historic art and lifestyle with paintings and furnishings dating back to the early 1600s including a Rembrandt self portrait. A perfectly leisurely Sunday activity.

And in perfect contrast going in completely the opposite direction, a few weeks ago we experienced Virtual Reality for the first time and oh, what an incredible experience that was. Pretty much across the road from us is an underground arcade/mini theme park. You know the kind of thing. Coin pushing fountains, video games, fairground games such as throw the ring or basketball stuff. Air hockey. Oh I love air hockey. It’s all very clean, tidy, bright and shiny. And running through the middle of it all is tiny versions of the big theme park machinery. So yes. A rollercoaster running over the heads of the gamers. We do that today. Just to do it. Of course it’s not big world crazy but a lot more fun and thrilly spilly than it might have looked. And a few other smaller versions types of rides you could expect to find.

But then. But then. We go and try out the VR. Oh wow. Nothing could have prepared us for it. And yes, we’ve seen it on TV dramas and all the rest just like anyone else. But the (virtual) reality. I did not expect it to feel this, well, real. They have a choice of rollercoasters and other bits and pieces. We go straight for the top level. And it’s truly terrifying, wildly exciting and totally adrenalising. We make completely involuntary noises and body parts and limbs clench and flail. It’s all cartoony. Meaning when me or Maja look to each other, we see not Mark or Maja but two cartoon rabbits but totally us at the same time with all our movements. Not that there’s that much looking left or right to be done as we’re thrown all through this interstellar rollercoaster experience. And with it not being, well, real, it can do all kinds of things a reality rollercoaster can’t do. Like fly off broken tracks and land on the next ones. Or take ridiculously vertical routes. Seriously. When it stops and kind of teeters and rocks back and forth on a sheer drop it is completely joyfully terrifying. I have no idea what kind of ridiculousness we must appear to anyone with a mind to watch what’s going on. When it’s over, we can barely speak above astonished whimpers for minutes afterwards. What the hell just happened? We. Did. Not. See. That. Coming. In the context of an amusement arcade, is the ride a little expensive? Yes. To be fair it is. But really, if you see such a thing and you have the chance to do it. Do it. This truly is a special experience and one we will be returning especially for. 

Day 199

Tuesday January 23

Today is the day. Just over a year after first arriving in London, we’re beginning in earnest. We are doing this thing and we are taking it on now. So far it’s mostly been open mic nights, one NOW Hustle and some memorable afternoons in The Marquis, the fantastic live music bar near Trafalgar Square. This is a venue we very much hope to continue building in, whatever happens with any of the below. 

Which is that we’re now starting a truly proactive push with something that has been on our minds since sometime during the summer. The idea, I believe, came into focus during our time at the Edinburgh Festival, really solidifying on the long drive back home.

This is to go for a residency in a Camden Town bar, maybe even two or three of them. But in any live scenario, just getting one gig, regular or not, can be hard enough so let’s start with the one then see if we can build from there.

I first wrote about the significance of Camden in Mark’s Diaries – marksdiaries.wordpress.com. 

I became aware of what it really meant in my earliest London days, probably in the beginnings of 2015, through a guy called Kieron, one of my first bar colleagues and London friends. We were both working in The Oxford in Kentish Town which borders Camden to the north. He was starting to take me seriously as a bass player and took me aside one night to tell me that what I needed to do was to get myself known in north London. I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about. Hearing something like this was intimidating. Where and how the hell did one start to do that? As I hung out with Kieron over the next few months and we went for nights out after work – mostly walking down the road to Camden from Kentish Town – the concept began to take shape in my mind. To get known in north London meant to get known in Camden. It was here that everyone in north London came to hang out. If you were known here, that reputation could spread out to all the other areas. Not necessarily that people would go home and talk about what they had seen or heard or whatever, although that could also be possible, especially if you bring that into the context of The Diaries and original music. It was more that when you went out to those areas yourself, your Camden reputation would follow along as you would meet people who already knew you because of how Camden sat centrally to everyone else’s social world. 

To expand on this, the theory is, get yourself known in Camden and you’re known in north London. Get yourself known in north London and you’re known in London. Which is the train of thought Kieron was on. Because guess what. Many of the same people would also travel to, and from, south, west, east and central. Go to any of those areas, which by this point means anywhere in London, and as soon as you walk into a bar – we’re mostly talking about a bar at least adjacent to a music scene right now – someone else knows you from somewhere else, or you get chatting to someone and discover all kinds of mutual connections, and you’re away. Take it a stage further from there, and once you’re known in London, you hold the key to being known nationally. Get known nationally and you have the key to being known internationally. And the one key from which all these and all other keys are cut, is cut in Camden. And one of the key keys to holding that key? A Camden residency. Or even better, a few of them. That’s what we’re going for now.

You may be aware of Justin Hawkins, the lead vocalist of The Darkness. They had their huge moments in the early 2000s, but they’re still very active now. Apart from that, Justin has his own podcast on Youtube – Justin Hawkins Rides Again. In this, he talks all things music and music industry, including going deep into his and The Darkness’ own experiences. As we were mulling over this idea of essentially focusing on trying to get Camden residencies, Justin had an episode where he talked about what he thought people should do if they were really serious about this music thing. His first piece of advice was to think about where you were living, and to consider if it was the best place to be. If not, then if you really were serious, maybe you should think about moving somewhere that could be the best place to be. In this, while making allowances for cities in America and maybe elsewhere, he concluded that London should be high on anyone’s list. When he mulled over where in London – it is a huge place afterall – he settled and said, ‘I still think Camden.’ Then, among all the other things you could do to really push things along, he said it was time to talk about The Residency. He said that one of the most important things The Darkness did to get going in the early days was to secure a residency in Camden. Hearing him say all this didn’t set off any lightbulbs; we were already thinking that way. But what hearing him say all this did do was to add weight and validation to what we were already thinking.

We were planning on actually starting all this last Tuesday, but then came our below par Youtube performance. As a result of that we decided to give ourselves a week in rehearsal before getting going with it. Then the show we did this last Friday came up during that week which was a perfect way back in. It also served to concentrate our rehearsals a bit more because we now had a deadline rather than, ‘Oh, we’ll go out when we’re ready.’ Yes we were only going to play two or three songs on Friday but you do have to be ready for different eventualities, room moods and indeed performer moods so only having two or three songs ready isn’t enough. Even for that show we did want to have most of our repertoire there at our fingertips.

So yes, we’re ready now and Friday was a great marker to throw down for that. We think we would like a residency that was every week, then another couple more coming in once a month or bi-weekly or something. But again, you go out, talk to people, take what works and play it from there. So who knows what other formulae or possibilities could be thrown up?

We went out a few times in the Autumn just walking round Camden and checking out a few venues that we had in mind to see if they could indeed be as suitable as we thought they could be. Most of the bars we didn’t go into at all, and of those we did, it was a very quick let’s get the feel of the place type thing. In those walkarounds we discounted a few we thought might have been good, and added one or two we hadn’t considered. That gave us our shortlist of venues to aim at when the time came. We did this in just one concentrated area of Camden. Our plan is to hit these bars first, and if nothing comes about, go and look at the other two or three areas of Camden we haven’t properly looked at yet. If nothing there either, if you go one way at the end of northern Camden you head into Belsize Park, another good area, while the other way at the same end takes you to Primrose Hill/St John’s Wood. Ditto. For what it’s worth, and maybe even for trivia if for no other reason, St John’s Wood is home to Abbey Road Studios and a certain zebra crossing you may or may not be aware of. And of course there’s the rest of London. Basically, we have a lot of options and will just keep going. 

In considering bars, there’s also the local knowledge of knowing which venues are more about local characters, which ones are for the music heads, and which ones are more touristy. A lot of this is just in the ether and comes from lived experience. I have a good amount of that having already lived in Camden Town bordering Kentish Town for six years. And in the seven months we’ve lived here now (or 198 days) we’ve been out and about enough to have built a little more local knowledge. Incidentally, if you want to read about my time in Kentish Town and getting into the London music scene in general, that’s all in Mark’s Diaries too.

As for The Diaries’ experience in London leading up to where we are now and what we’re about to embark on, our first year has more or less gone down like this.

December 21, 2022: Arrive in London from Ireland having secured an apartment in Shoreditch. Wait three months for Maja to finish her probation on the job she’d come with. Then we hit the trail the second week which was…

April 9, 2023: Set off on a run of 12 performances in ten weeks. Pretty good going. From a standing start to averaging more than a show a week. Most of them open mics, but still, getting out there, being seen, meeting people, and getting to know the scene and getting to be known on it ourselves. And discovering that hell yes, our material hits as hard in London as it ever did in Ireland or anywhere else we took it in Europe. This took us up to…

June 18: The Wonderville performance in the West End. It was around this time we started talking about moving to Camden. Immediately all thoughts of live playing stopped as we began looking for an apartment and then got started on the actual move itself.

Then, during that moving period, the idea of going to the Edinburgh Festival took hold. So we decided to focus on being properly ready for Edinburgh rather than trying to pick up gigging again. That meant being ready with as many songs as possible should any opportunities arise while in Scotland. This preparation also included refreshing songs we hadn’t played in a while. 

August 6, 2023: The Edinburgh adventure begins.

Back from Edinburgh and we were deep into August and the London weather was simply too hot to contemplate going out and hustling or playing in. Sure a case could be made to say you carry on, but really, temperatures did just feel too much. Then into…

September 25, 2023: Maja headed off to Sweden for a short while. Because of that we decided to leave getting back to gigging before she came back rather than trying to hustle then just playing for a few weeks before having to stop again. We continued to go out and about in Camden and got to know a few more people on the scene but didn’t push The Diaries at all. Maybe in the odd conversation here or there. But the main thought was to let Maja do Sweden, then hit it again as soon as she got back. Then of course while she was there she got the redundancy news. So then it was onto job hunting which meant another extended period where we had to forget about playing. 

Coming out of that we had that whole run through the Autumn where we both had one sickness after another three or four times. This led to Maja barely able to find her voice even during times she was well. 

This all runs us up to the Christmas period, then of course the beginning of January when nothing much is happening at all.

So here we are now. Today. . 

Part of actually living in Camden means most of the bars you visit are Camden bars. Of course. Living in Kentish Town as I used to, with Maja briefly living there as well, you do come into Camden now and again, but then you go to central London too, and maybe other London towns. As well as dropping into your locals in Kentish Town. Which could well be most of your drop ins with all the other stuff spread out. And when you venture into Camden, it’s usually to that destination bar. You know, We’re going to The Blues Kitchen tonight, or so on. That and two or three other bars. But very very once in a while. Probably not enough to really get your face known. Unless of course you choose to regularly Destinate one or two of those other bars rather than stay local. There are people that do that. But let’s face it. Most of the time you’re going to stay local.

When you live in Camden Town, it’s all local. So we’ve really been able to have a look around and get a proper feel for what you might call the Destinations and also get known in them. When we started to think about where we might start to look for residencies, we decided to try a place called Quinns first. Not only is it a total Camden institution but it’s right across the road from us.

So when we’ve popped out and we’ve wanted to stay very local, guess where we went? As we got to know the place, we discovered they appeared keen to try things out. We discovered they have a comedy night for a start. And we got to hear about intermittent live performances that had happened here. So as well as getting a generally good feel for it, we also started to think that when the time came, we’d get at least an understanding ear. As we became more semi regular, we also got a very good feeling from the main man Dominic. So we’re not attack this place with a NOW Hustle. Instead we’re just going to drop in, take our time, have a few pints and wait to be in a casual chat with the man himself.

He’s not massively available tonight. Because he’s hosting the weekly quiz. Wow. That sounds fun. Let’s stay and do the quiz. So we do. Afterwards and late on, it’s all quiet and cosy at the bar and we just fall into quick chats with Dominic as we often do. This is where we finally tell him what we’re up to in London. Up until now we’ve never even mentioned we do music. He gregariously spreads his arms. ‘We can try it in here tomorrow,’ he says. Like that, we’re in. Of course, keeping in is going to be a very different matter. But all you can ever ask of a place is an opportunity. As we say our goodbyes and head across the road back home, we hold that opportunity deep in our pockets.

The London Diary: Camden, day 200

Day 200

Wednesday January 24

Something I forgot to mention in the last entry. This whole push we’re just starting now, which is about to manifest in its first live show in just a few minutes, is something we wanted to get started on possibly as far back as early November. Which was when one sickness after another kicked in. And as each subsequent period happened, we could see the calendar inch, then speed towards Christmas, knowing that if we didn’t get at least one show on the board by mid, or even early, December, we would just have to sit back and wait till late January. Which, as stated by the very date of this entry right at the top of this paragraph, is exactly what happened. 

Right. On to today.

Rock’n’roll wisdom #782. It’s harder to play to five people than it is to five hundred. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Apart from anything else, this can cause a situation where, even if one or two people (up to 40 per cent of your audience in this situation) like you, no-one wants to break ranks and clap and cheer if everyone else is staying silent. So in a sense, the silence can become exponential. Have I just invented exponential silence? I do believe I have.

So yeah. You really do feel naked when being stared down by just a few people in a bar. Or possibly even worse, not being stared down. Which means they just keep their backs to you and hunch over their pints, probably hoping that by the time they turn round to go to the toilet or whatever, you’re not there anymore. If it’s five people being like, we really want to see you, show us what you’ve got, that can be really good. But apathy bordering on unwelcomeness? We really do get the feeling that the people in here tonight either couldn’t care less whether or not we were there, or really wish we weren’t. No-one’s being rude and there isn’t a single thing in any way anyone acts that we could complain about. But you can just tell enthusiasm levels are non-existent. And we’re going to stand up and play to this now.

It’s a sceptical crowd (crowd?) on a wet and reluctant Wednesday. I totally get it. If I was in a relaxed cosy bar just trying to have a quiet pint and maybe catch the last bits of the football while chatting quietly to a few mates or casual bar acquaintances, then two hyped up bunnies with a guitar smashed in saying they were going to play some of their own songs? Yeah. My reluctant cynicism would kick in too. Yeah. I really think I’d be like, ‘Fair play to you guys, but not tonight, eh?’ Maybe I would be keen to go ahead to let the guys show what they had, but I have to admit that would be nothing more than associative bias.

We think Dominic is really keen to hear us, but anyone else just couldn’t care less. But we’re set up, we’re set to play, and we’re going to do it. Sometimes, in more, let’s say, politely reluctant environments, we’ve gone in gentle, people have worked into it, and then, on one particularly memorable occasion, have eventually been like, ‘OK. Give it now. Let’s see what you’ve got.’ None of that here. But we don’t wait. It’s a slow Wednesday and this is our first chance to make a first impression. The next impression won’t be the first one. I understand that’s how it goes. We go straight for the tried and tested crowd pleaser I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). And we play it like we mean it. Straight up, raw, and stadium. Wow. Actually, not a bad reaction. The guys have swivelled round in their chairs and are watching us with some interest now. We barely take a breath. Into Rock’n’Roll Tree. Halfway through this the phone cameras are out. And we get a good vocal reaction when we hit the final climax. Everyone’s totally with us now. All on the same side and they’re ready and waiting for more. One more, we say. We only intended to play three or four anyway, and it seems like quick in and out is the way to go. We’ve got ourselves ahead in tonight’s competition. Let’s stay there. The Cat comes out and the filming doesn’t stop. People are leaning forward into us now. Dominic is loving it. And so are we. As big a reaction as you could expect from five guys when we finish this one. 

But as the last notes echo and fade and the guys quietly turn back to their pints, the cavernous bar swallows up all our efforts and it’s already as though we were never there. We have absolutely no idea how it’s gone. If anything, badly. We sidle back to where we came from, almost trying not to be seen, and order a pint at the bar. We sit there in silence, the rest of the bar feeling like it’s also in silence. Some muted conversation down there but not much else and no-one’s looking in our direction. It’s as though we’ve never been in. ‘Oh, I feel awkward,’ says Maja. Yeah. I feel it too. But we’re going to stick around and front this out. We did great. We decided a long time ago that if we ever bombed in a bar it was them and not us. Then Dominic comes over. He stands over us in silence for a while then says, ‘You guys were shit.’ I look him in the eye with a ‘no hard feelings’ smile and say, ‘Thankyou very much.’ I genuinely have no idea if he’s joking or not and up front honesty is always to be appreciated. Even if, or maybe even especially if, it’s negative. Almost immediately he seems to decide he can’t do it to us anymore. ‘No, I really enjoyed that,’ he says, breaking into a smile. ‘Especially that third one. That was your best one.’ Oh wow. Yeah. We’ll take that. Then, as if taking us into his confidence, what he says next kind of suggests that how we thought it was going down was how it was going down. He tells us that when we started, all hyped up and into it, one of his regulars down there said something to him like, ‘What the hell is this?’ Yeah. We saw that guy. He didn’t give much, but there was a kind of intrigued interest going on the more we played. Well, at the end, Dominic says that guy turned to him, nodded and said, ‘They were quite good.’ Apparently that’s a big deal. We’re now told that this is a discerning music fan who is slow to praise and quick to criticise. I’m sure you know the type. Open but cynical I think would be fair. Possibly keen and on the lookout for something new and great, but perpetually underwhelmed and disappointed with what they’re being offered. But no. He liked us, and Dominic says that’s significant. More. As we’re packing up that guy comes over to us and is enthusiastic and very friendly in his praise. Oh wow. That was a moment. One by one almost everyone else in the bar also comes over to say well done and to tell us how much they enjoyed it and that it was great to hear something different. Really, if that’s not a triumphant gig from hard beginnings, I don’t know what is. For a first time out, no fanfare, no anticipation. Wet Wednesday with the football on and all that. Yes, we will take that. 

Whatever has happened tonight, Dominic thinks there’s been enough to at least have another go. He comes and talks to us again and we start to talk about what we might do next to see if we can at least try to make this work. First, he says he should have known it would be quiet on a Wednesday and that this might not have been the best night to try to kick things off. He suggests next Tuesday for another try. That’s quiz night. He says there’ll be a decent few in and it could be good to see what we can do with that with a few songs during the break. Brilliant. We’re on.

The London Diary: Camden, day 201

Day 201

Thursday January 25

It’s a nice surprise when Dominic gets in touch to see if we could go for that second try in Quinns tonight. OK. It’s comedy night. They tend to be busy nights and he says he really wants to see what we can do with a crowd. Brilliant. We’re totally up for that.

We’ve been to that night before. It happens at the back of the bar, a thick black curtain turning it into a separate room. Dominic suggests we turn up during the first half, set up, and then be ready to go when they come out for the break. He says it will be a cool surprise for them. Lovely idea. Yes. Let’s do that.

What can we say? It doesn’t work. It doesn’t just not work. It fails spectacularly. It’s something we would have suggested ourselves and indeed something we thought we could have connected with during the Edinburgh Festival. Hook up with a comedian, or a group of them, and play to their audience in the break. Or before. Or after. It’s something we’ve even thought of pitching to a comedian or two in London. So yeah. Dominic’s idea was solid and something we were fully behind. The reality is a full one eighty turn away from the theory. They’re there on a comedy night. Not a music night. And for the organisers, this is their crowd, no-one else’s. We’re not allowed to have it. 

So what exactly does happen? Well, as soon as we start playing, they start walking. Right out of the side door onto the street. And out there they all huddle and stay, resolutely, determinedly, waiting for us to finish as we play gamely and full heartedly to an all but empty and very large bar. We spiritedly take it to three songs but the writing is all over the wall, over the ceilings and out onto and across the street. Take this one on the chin. We were not wanted in here from the beginning and it had nothing to do with anything we were or weren’t going to play. They could have had anyone in here tonight and it wouldn’t have made any difference. Hell, they could even have had…The Diaries.

But all is not quite as disastrous as it may appear. As we’re taking our gear down, someone from a table in an alcove down the bar, a table that we couldn’t see, comes up and says disappointedly, ‘Is that it? Are you done?’ ‘Afraid so,’ I say. We were here to play for the comedy crowd in the break and they couldn’t have cared less so we just called it.’ ‘Well we thought you guys were great,’ he says. Oh. OK. Thanks. He goes on his way and we carry on packing up. As we do, more and more people come up to us to say more of the same. 

It’s fair to say we still feel a little downcast when we go and talk to Dominic, who was busy with other things and didn’t catch our blink when you miss it set. ‘It didn’t work,’ I say. ‘The comedy guys just didn’t want music in their half time break and we never had a chance.’ ‘Did people come up to you afterwards and say they enjoyed it and well done?’ Dominic asks. ‘They did.’ ‘You can’t ask for more than that,’ he replies. ‘That’s a success.’ We’re quick to let him know that we thought tonight was a great idea and it’s something we’d been thinking of for a while. But I add, ‘We’ll be knocking that idea on the head though. We’ve tried it now and discovered it doesn’t work.’ ‘Forget about all that now,’ says Dominic. ‘Shall we just carry on with playing in the break of the quiz next week like we said?’ Yes, yes and yes. And just like that, tonight never happened.

The London Diary: Camden, day 206

Day 206

Tuesday January 30

Unfortunately there’s not a massive turnout for the quiz. It’s a fun night but laid back night with a steady hum of energy. We respond to that at our halftime break slot by deciding to enhance the existing atmosphere rather than smashing into it in our usual style. We go for a low down version of Freefall followed by Sand Bang. Freefall gets a wonderfully chilled and appreciative reaction. ‘That’s a really good song,’ that kind of thing. But then Sand Bang really hits with a few cheers and whoop calls. A massive reaction in the circumstances.

This is all promising and we settle in and enjoy the night rather than pursue what’s next for us in here. We’ll leave that for another day and just enjoy the post quiz vibe. And anyway, a massive part of all this is to stay afterwards and chat to the people who’ve seen you. And yeah. Appreciate their appreciation. We really feel that tonight with a few very enthusiastic conversations during which we’re about other venues that would be receptive to us, along with the people in those venues we should go and talk to. Just wonderful local information. We also get asked a few times when and where we’re playing next. As usual, we have no idea. And while we may yet build up a futures roster, we really do quite like the drop in and play element we’ve followed through most of our gigging adventures. However, we do also say that we’re hoping to build something in here, so that could be something for them to look out for.

Yeah, we can’t yet say we’re in here every whatever day it might hopefully be, but it is really great to start to feel those little seeds of interest. However, we certainly think and hope we’ve done enough so far to book the next one in when the time comes for that conversation. 

The London Diary: Camden, day 211

Day 211

Sunday February 4

Tommy of The Marquis gets in touch. If you need a reminder, or are new to this, that’s the bar right by Trafalgar Square. One of his staff is leaving today and they’re having a big music day with a whole load of acts. Do we fancy it. Oh wow. Yes. We will be there. Thankyou very much. This will be our fifth gig in 17 days. We turn up totally matchfit and ready.


The main act of the day will be Tom McQ who will do his own full show from around 1pm to 4pm. I know opening acts aren’t usually the main act, but this isn’t to be seen as an opening act. It’s basically a separate thing with Tom completely owning the place for those three hours. After that, Tommy says, it will be a bit of a free for all, kind of organise as you go kind of thing. During all this, two bands which will include different staff members will be playing. The way it comes down is that Tom does his thing which we catch a good 30 to 40 minutes of. There’s a bit of a break, which has the effect of separating the two entertainment entities as I was saying. Then, once the stage and PA is all set up for the two bands, the floor is essentially free. We take the first spot, and then Brian of The Barrytones takes the second. After this, it’s band time to take us all the way to close at 8pm.

A word while we’re here on Tom McQ. He’s not just a singer/songwriter. He’s a whole event of a stage act, fully dressed for the stage, with the stage also fully dressed for him. He lives and breathes what he does and has done for years. In a three hour show, his own original songs fit right in among classic crowd pleasing covers. This is a trick so many acts find so hard to pull off as you spot the originals a mile off with the quality suddenly and very markedly dipping. Tom’s songs suffer no such fates.

I first saw him and met him when he played The Record Day at The Marquis in possibly 2015, an event I played at myself with Dan as The Insiders. Tom’s been playing there ever since and has progressed on the scene to the point that he managed to get a slot at Glastonbury last year. You can find him on instagram at tommcqofficial.

Tom has good support in here today, including a friend who owns a cocktail bar in Tottenham, north London, a place he plays at regularly.

As I said, I’ve known Tom for almost a decade. We don’t go and have coffee or anything regularly, or at all, really. But in the way of music scenes everywhere, whenever our paths happen to cross, no matter how much time has passed in between the last crossing, we come together as good friends. It’s also pretty cool that when we walk in today we get a big shoutout from him from the stage. Always helps the kudos and, yeah, lifts the ego a little. Cheers Tom.

He finishes his set, comes and joins us for a while, then does his mingling thing, then goes back to the stage to pull down so that the stage can be rebuilt for what’s going to happen for the rest of the day. Suddenly, looking towards me he calls out, ‘Hey Mark, come and have a look at this.’ So of course I do. Tom bursts into laughter. I wasn’t talking to you, he says. Here comes my friend who was sitting right behind you. He’s Mark as well. But anyway, you stay here too. This is pretty cool. Now Mark’s joined us, we have a little laugh between ourselves at what’s just happened and have a handshake hello. And that’s how I meet Mark. What Tom wants to show him/us is a signed guitar hanging up on the wall next to the stage area. It’s signed by Damien Dempsey to Tommy – Tommy in this entry is landlord Tommy. Tom is, well, the other Tom in this paragraph. As for Damien, if you’re not familiar with him, he’s a very successful Irish singer/songwriter from Dublin who shone hugely in the Meteor Awards between 2004 and 2009 being nominated for eleven and winning six, including best Irish male act which he’s won twice.

This is just one piece of signed memorabilia all around the bar which Tommy has been gifted over the years. The latest piece of memorabilia is a round plaque behind the bar, which was hung up in the place it actually happened for a while before being moved for reasons I don’t know. People probably kept taking it down and reading it and passing it around or something. That place was in the corner area where the stage is, and the plaque commemorates when Green Day played here in November, just a couple of months ago. Let me repeat that. Green Day played here in November just a couple of months ago. The story goes that Green Day had heard of The Marquis being a supporter of original music and had some cool bands. They began to follow the venue and saw videos of some of the shows they had. They were so impressed by the intention, vibe, and level of talent they saw that they decided when they were booked to play London next, they wanted to come and play here themselves. The only person who knew, until the day, was Tommy himself. The event made the news worldwide.

And it’s on this stage we’re going to play in half an hour or so.

I walk back to our table from the stage where Tom has been showing me/us the Dempsey guitar, and there’s a new addition, sitting on the other side of the table from Maja, facing the stage and minding his own business. He’s not gone and sat down with Maja or us or anything. He’s just found a seat going spare near the front of the bar and taken it. In the interests of togetherness and being social and all that we introduce ourselves to him and bring him into our company. His name is Ant. Cool. And that’s how we meet Ant.

A few minutes later, Mark turns up. Yes that one. He sits on the other side of the table from us as well, and he and Ant get talking. It’s clear they know each other very well. Soon, all four of us are chatting away, and during that time Tom comes and joins us as well. Of course he does. Those guys are his friends. Somewhere in the conversation Ant casually mentions a cocktail bar he owns in Tottenham and I’m like, ‘Oh, that’s your place that Tom was talking about.’ Yep. It was indeed. He asks a little about us and we tell him we’re playing in here today and have played quite a few times before as well. That gets his interest and we talk a little more about live music and stuff. I tell him a little more about us and he says, ‘You don’t need to sell it. You’re good enough to play in here. You’re in.’ And that’s how that can get done. Cool.

Pretty much at the same time as all this is going on, Per walks in. No, not totally unannounced and surprising like that time on the last afternoon of the 100 hour Jam in the Blues Kitchen. He’s in London for a short visit and we were intending to get together. We’ve let him know we’re playing in here today and here he is. Brilliant. He’ll also film our show. Brillianter.

That showtime arrives. So often we have to make the show and really force ourselves into the collective consciousness. But not today. The whole bar is ready and waiting for things to happen now. As we get set up, we’re on the main floor but looking up at a lot of faces looking back. Things are expected. OK. Let’s go. For the first time ever at any kind of show like this we start with a slow song. Sand Bang. Oh man, they’re with us from the first note. This song is atmospheric and cabaret/musical like almost. Unfortunately we had sound issues with the cordless mic so Maja is on a corded mic and unable to really roam as she would, especially with a song like this. But that really doesn’t seem to matter as it rumbles on and the crowd gets totally sucked into the drama of it. Then they get taken off as we near the end and the song takes off too. When we hit the last notes, there’s a slight pause before the applause and cheers soak over us. Into that pause a single female voice says, in her own hushed tones, ‘Oh wow.’ Hearing something like that is worth any number of applauses.

On we go and we hit them with three of our smash set songs, closing out with Make Me Shine. This feels like a London show. They’ve been with us all the way and so many people come up and talk to us or congratulate us after, or offer to buy us drinks. One guy even says, ‘You guys belong on Top Of The Pops.’ For our non UK readers, that’s the UK’s biggest ever chart show and was almost required weekly watching once upon a time. It’s been off the screens for quite a while now, but we know what he means. We will do our best to accommodate.

Back to our table and Ant and Mark are looking at us slightly differently from how they were ten minutes ago. We were not expecting that, is the general tone and sentiment. Yes. He definitely wants to see us playing in his place. It will be done.

As we talk more to the two of them now we discover they have a long Camden history of being on the live music and DJ scenes and are both still very active on them. Of course they are. Ant has his bar and Mark, among other things, is DJing in some very prominent places. Their histories in Camden go back 15 to 20 years. So rooted are they that Mark actually has a picture of him painted onto the wall inside The Good Mixer. To recap, that’s the Camden bar that was at the centre of Britpop and which was one of the main regular spots for Amy Winehouse among many many other stars. Inside the bar are paintings of notable regulars, all set in a single bar scene. Inside that scene, we now learn, is Mark. If that’s not established in Camden music I don’t know what is.

We stick around for the rest of the afternoon taking in Brian’s fantastic acoustic cover set then the two rock’n’roll sets from the bands belonging to various barstaff. Or the bands various barstaff are in. I don’t want to assume any dynamics here. Both are just brilliant and totally rock the place. This all goes right up until close. We say our goodbyes all over the bar, then the three of us – myself, Maja and Per – are off to The Blues Kitchen in Camden. 

What this means is getting the tube back to Camden, going back to our place, dropping off the guitar, picking up a bass, then walking to The Blues Kitchen. But there’s one more thing on the way.

As we’re coming up the escalators at Camden Tube station we hear a call from behind us. It’s Mark. Oh, hi Mark. Cool. He tells us he’s off to The Hawley Arms. This is another major bar on the Camden music history trail. He says he’s going to put a word in for us. Oh wow. And just like that we have another potential venue to aim at where we will already be spoken for. This is all quite a fantastic vibe and afternoon to take with us as we walk from our place and down the road to The Blues Kitchen for the Sunday Jam.

From today’s Marquis show

https://youtu.be/wdaF2GwBPCw

Sand Bang

https://youtu.be/GEH3mHr5MHo

I Like You (Better When You’re Naked)

The London Diary: Camden, Days 227 and 241

Day 227

Tuesday February 20

I think we can just say that life has been getting in the way a little bit lately, so not too much going on musically. Until tonight when we find our way, in just under an hour and two buses, to Ten To One Cocktail Bar, Ant’s fantastic place in Tottenham, north London. What we find is a really cool, perfectly rectangular shaped bar space, all set up for a kind of mixed open mic featuring comedians and singer/songwriters. Our first impression is that this looks remarkably like Laksmi, our favourite bar in Berlin. It’s largely painted red inside too. Oh, and right up to date. We recently unearthed what we had thought was a lost video from the last time we played there. Coming to a Youtube channel or thread near you soon. Back to Ten To One. It’s a single long space with a bar running more or less down one side. The stage area is on the left as you come in. This places it right in front of the window which gives it an earthy street backdrop, augmented by regular double decker red London buses which massively add to the experience and to videos we’ve discovered. Added to all this, a large neon bar sign provides really cool extra framing for performers.

As soon as we walk in, Ant looks up and is delighted to see us. We told him last week that we weren’t going to make it then but that we were hoping to this week, and here we are. The place feels immediately warm and welcoming and a few people take note of us after our effusive welcome. After all the hellos, he says that Den’s running the night – The Ramshackle Collective – and he’s already told her all about us. Just then, she turns up and says hello. Brilliant. Introduced, on the list and all good to go.

We settle down and are told we’ll be somewhere in the second half. Between now and then it’s something around a 60/40 split in favour of the comedy. People newish on the scene trying out new material, and people playing their first few shows, or even their first show, as they begin to find their comedy groove. I think stand up comedy is about the hardest thing you can do in entertainment and special respect is reserved for anyone having their first go at it, and indeed anyone just doing it at all. 

Den kicks things off with what she introduces as the theme song of the evening. Called Nowhere Parade, it sets the scene for where this venue actually is. On a tiny parade of shops in a quiet residential kind of area somewhere out in zone three. But then these can often be the kind of places you find the truly cool destination bars which this place very much aspires to be. Given its independence, full-on support of talent and original music, and the general vibe which Ant has created, it really could become a destination bar. A true London gem to be sought out and travelled to. It turns out people already do; during the night, Den asks for who’s come here the furthest. Someone who’s come here from out in Hertfordshire wins tonight, but we hear stories of people coming from much further afield for a night, and even the occasional international traveller is apparently discovering it, so something is clearly going on here. And Den sets the tone for the night fantastically with songs tinged with observational comedy and surreal social commentary.

As for Ten To One itself, as we sit down and look around, we see it’s made up of so much more than the venue area we’re in right now. Walk through this space to the right and there’s a pretty large outside covered area, all very well appointed with tables and chairs, kind of set up to kind of look like a diner. Then on the other side, up another few steps, there’s a lovely restaurant area. You really could pack quite a crowd into the whole place. And all of this in a former betting shop. Hence the name, Ten To One.

By the time we’re called up the atmosphere is well and truly warmed up. With Ant having invited us here especially after having seen us at The Marquis, we’re keen to 

demonstrate to him our range of repertoire. This may take some time over a period of weeks and more, but for starters we’re keen not to play any of the songs we played when he saw us. So tonight we go for Talk About The Weather and Rock’n’Roll Tree. Although we do open with Sand Bang which we also opened with at The Marquis. The reasoning there being that we haven’t yet done it justice live and really feel we’re ready now to get a solid full live performance of this one under our belts. And we do. This eases us really nicely into it and then we’re away with the next two. Which take us right up to the high energy levels that so impressed Ant at The Marquis, although we like to think he enjoyed the atmospheric and theatrical Sand Bang as well. But yeah. Talk About The Weather and Rock’n’Roll Tree. Two authentic smash set songs. And smash in here tonight they certainly do, with Ant rocking behind us and really getting into it as he keeps an eye on the sound. And yes. Having an actual venue owner appear to enjoy us as much as this really is a great boost.

When the night is all over, the buzz around the room is all about the high levels of energy of our set and how it all but put people through the ceiling. Ant is on it as well. He pulls us aside and looks at his calendar of events. He says he’s all booked up on his Wednesday night full set music nights until May, but he’d love to have us headline a show that night. He says we can look at this together over the next few months, deciding on any acts from here that could work well with us. So yeah. We’re in and we’re on. Our first offer of a headline show in an actual London music venue. 

We go home quite a different way to how we came here as we head out onto the street and find that the first bus coming our way is going to Archway. Oh, let’s do that. Which gives us a walk home from Archway, through Kentish Town and onto Camden. Right past the two places we lived in London before Ireland, and onto the place we live now.

And another thought or two on that Nowhere Parade song. Yeah. By London standards, Ten To One is a bit isolated and kind of out of the way. But that really makes it the true London hidden gem that it is. A place you really have to seek out or care about to find. And when you do, you know it’s yours and isn’t going to be beset by tourists. Yes the tourists are all fantastic, we absolutely love living in a place that people want to come all over the world to and we very much feel a sense of pride of that in our own Camden Town. But to know the places that are yours, that the tourists don’t know about – unless they really, really look – can be its own special thing too. It’s really what makes you a local. And knowing places like Ten To One and hopefully becoming part of them is what truly makes you a London local. And also being apart like it is, I’m guessing makes it a bit easier to attract and build its own local crowd. Its own community. And to have a chance of becoming part of that is its own kind of special. 

Day 241

Tuesday March 5

I told you life had got in the way a little bit. I think you can see that now with these last few entries being quite far apart. February 4, February 20, and now March 5. But here we are. Out and ready to go again. And yeah, I think I can say that we are pretty much on the trail again. It begins tonight with a return to Ant’s bar, The Ten To One Cocktail Bar in Tottenham. 

And once more a wonderful night of music, comedy and general hanging out and chatting to all the different acts and audience members. But there’s a slight shift for us tonight. We’re held right back until the very end when we’re actually called to close the show. We had no idea that was going to happen until Den announced us as the last act of the night. Second time out and we get that privilege. Fantastic. We grab it with all four of our hands and totally smash it with I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) – Ant had heard this one but we decided it really was time to unleash it on everyone else in here – an absolutely breathless My Game My Rules – of which we get our first full recording – and Fire. This is one of our more gentle songs although it does have a barnstorming finish. It’s also nice to show we can do something a bit more controlled and reserved. I feel it’s like we’re saying, look, we don’t have to blow the doors off every single time. Although to be fair, before we get to Fire, we already have pretty much blown the doors right off and everyone’s just desperately holding on to try not to get blown out with them. The reactions have been huge again tonight. And again, Ant seems to be really into what we’re doing. Yes. We really are feeling good about this venue. It’s relatively far out when you live in Camden with everything on your doorstep, but as I was saying in the last entry, very much worth the journey.

The London Diary: Camden, day 248

Day 248

Tuesday March 12

Mark:

Oh we’re so glad we’re filming things more and more now. In the earlier days, which encompasses both of our European tours and most of our Ireland adventures, we were reliant on other people to film us, but because most of our shows were in places we weren’t known, and by design we didn’t have friends with us, we often didn’t feel able to ask anyone to do it. Consequently, we have very little filmed record of whole swathes of gigs. One of the more disappointing experiences happened in Antwerp in August 2022. Someone was filming us and we asked if they wouldn’t mind doing it on one of our phones so that we could have it and send it to them if they wanted. They replied, in full friendliest of terms, oh don’t worry. I’ll send you my video. I could say we never received it. But maybe they just still haven’t got round to it yet.

Now fully armed with a telescopic tripod, we’re able to film consistently and reliably, and have managed to capture what is now all three performances at Den’s Ramshackle Collective night at the Ten To One Club in Tottenham, which is where we find ourselves again tonight. We’ve really not been on the hustle trail lately because there are other things we want and need to concentrate on, so it’s great to have this regular Tuesday thing we can come to whenever we want and have ten minutes or so on a great platform to do our thing. We’ve not even been looking too much at the residency thing lately either, although we have visited a few bars just to hang out and see how we feel about them. It’s also been kind of an idea to get to know people in the bars and the bar managers and so on, meaning that an approach to maybe playing there would be done in a softer, they know us now, kind of way rather than walking in off the street and doing a street hustle.

Just like last week, Den puts us on last tonight, which again is a fantastic privilege. We’ve decided to do two of our biggest sounding and fastest songs in Make Me Shine and The Cat. However, to throw a surprise in, we’ve decided to open with our most delicate song, Insanity. Yeah. The irony isn’t lost on us that our slowest, gentlest song  among a cacophony of smashers is called Insanity. Of the songs on our upcoming debut album, Insanity is the only slow starting one which doesn’t kick out of the gear in which it begins. We do have a few others like this floating about and waiting in the wings to be added to the repertoire, and a few mid tempo swaying type things, but nothing quite as all out gentle as this one.

As such, it appears our deliberate attempts to surprise worked, as we’re told later, by a few people, that they were waiting in full anticipation for this one to really kick in. But our real surprise is lying in wait and has been deliberately engineered. Having started with such a wonderful gentle thing, as soon as the last notes fade away, Maja charges in with ‘Go!’ And we smash straight into Make Me Shine. This juxtaposition is wild and makes Make Me Shine sound even heavier and more frantic than it usually does. And with our phone recording equipment being out there at the back among the audience, later on we’re able to hear the surprised laughter of shock as we hurtle through our second song.

Out of Make Me Shine and we plunge headlong into another enormous track – The Cat. This one really is full on with attitude, aggression and fun, all rolled into one. It contains one of my favourite chorus lines of ours: ‘I’m gonna rip it up spit it out smash it up I’m living on moonshine.’

We’re really getting to open up our repertoire in here. Three more songs to come next week.

It’s also really great to have found a place such as this which mixes it up more with a lot of comedians using it as a great place to find their voice and cut their teeth. You really can see the improvement in real time in people and that’s great to be a part of. And a few weeks in, it’s also fun to be a bit more familiar with some of the fun songs Den plays to introduce the evening and at various other points in the night. They really do lend themselves to audience participation and she actively encourages it at times. Many of these moments have become kind of our own Ramshackle Collective in-jokes, or whatever you would call them. Knowing her music and singing along to it makes you feel like part of a club. Which is kind of what they’re going for here as they look to build and build. We’re delighted to be playing our little part in that.

And here’s the full show. Insanity, Make Me Shine, The Cat

The London Diary: Camden, days 255 and 266

Day 255

March 19

Back at The Ramshackle Collective at Ten To One in Tottenham. Tomorrow Maja has to go back to Sweden for a few weeks. She possibly should have gone just a little earlier, but she really wanted to play here tonight, so the trip got put off until tomorrow morning.

Ten To One tends to close soon after the Ramshackle Night so to be able to properly meet some people and enjoy the hang as well as the show, it’s better to get in early. And just good to be around for the whole thing, we think. So nice and early tonight and, oh wow. The first thing we see when we walk in is that the place now has a stage. We can’t help but go straight up and stand on it and take in this new perspective. Ant looks up and says, ‘Yeah. We’re a proper music venue now.’ He really is trying to build something here. And with original music venues and venues in general closing down all over London and the UK, to see the trend reversed anywhere, and to see one opening up is priceless. I could say something similar about Tommy at The Marquis. And there’s a solid link between the two here tonight. This stage was put together between last week and this by Ant and Tom McQ, who regularly plays The Marquis. He’s here tonight and we go and catch up with him and Ant now. Between them, we hear of their own event going on in Walthamstow a week Saturday where Tom will be playing a full few sets of his own, and this time all originals. Before his show, and in between, Ant will be DJing. So a chance to see both of them fully doing their thing. Every other show I’ve seen Tom do he’s been in a situation where covers are kind of the thing, although it’s fine to throw some originals in. This will be a different evening so expect all originals. Brilliant. And Ant says that within his DJ sets he’s intending to play more and more original recorded music from upcoming bands. So that’s quite a few new stages, literally, being created in London as stages everywhere are being torn down.

Tom’s not playing here tonight. As a result I think I’m going to claim that tonight, the stage is ours. We don’t finish the show as we have the past two times, but it damn well feels like we do. Host Den has been at a comedy workshop and a bunch of the participants have come down here with her tonight. From here they have to get home to various parts of London and so won’t be staying too late. Den is really keen for them to see us, so asks if we don’t mind going on far earlier than the past few times. Really, we’ll go on when the host wants us to go on. We certainly aren’t taking closing the show for granted. But with the room being more full than we’ve yet seen it, and with so many of the people in it set to leave within the next half hour or so, we really do get the best spot of the night and it certainly feels like a closing set.

Fittingly, although we could have easily changed things around if needed, we’re planning to play two of our heaviest songs tonight with Nobody Said and Give Me The World. In between we’re playing one of those swayers I was talking about last week – Without A Gloria.

Tonight feels like a big show. It’s an open mic night, but our section of it feels like an event. I’ve seen few open mic acts ever get such a reception, and even fewer turn their, er, turn, into an event. It starts even before we begin due to a mistake as I forget to bring Maja’s mic to the stage when I bring my guitar from the back room. She saw me go out back and in all fairness assumed I would just bring the microphone as well. So there we are both on stage and all of a sudden we’re facing an expectant audience. Oh sorry Maja. I forgot your thing. So we have to leave everyone standing there while she goes through the audience to get it. As she starts to return, Ant decides to lead everyone in a steady insistent hand clap which accompanies her all the way back to the stage. With this, by the time she arrives, we are facing a very expectant room. Then she does something I’ve never seen her do before, insisting we’re not starting not beginning until the audience has closed up and moved up and in front of us at the stage. And so they do. From there, we have the room. Totally. And so it is that we get to close the first of the three of tonight’s sections. Brilliant. Job done, we can just go and chill out now and enjoy the rest of the evening. We’ve done our bit now.

Day 266

Saturday March 30

With Maja being in Sweden, I go to Tom’s thing on my own. I did mention it to a friend or two but no-one was able to make it, so here I am. This is happening at the Free Trade Hall in Walthamstow, an area a little further out in zone three, east London.

Ant’s DJ-ing before, in between sets, and after the show, with Tom playing on and off for the whole evening, and playing only his own original material, which is something I’ve not seen him do before. It’s great he’s created his own platform for this. Attendancewise, it looks pretty much full. Like comfortably full for a nightclub vibe. Which is really what it feels like. Ant’s playing all feel good, up tempo danceable songs, staying very much within pop and rock. A good chunk of 80s and 90s in there. And all around you can see people introducing themselves to each other with the room really feeling like something of a community. The kind of all in it together nightclub vibe I haven’t experienced since I don’t know how long, although to be fair, it’s also a long time since I’ve been to an actual nightclub, bars and live music venues having been more my thing since I don’t know when. I mingle a little and chat a bit with this person and that person, or have a quick interaction here and there. A hello to Ant. A quick word in passing with Tom. It’s just a really great night and a wonderful combination of DJ and live.

The London Diary: Camden, days 277 and 284

Day 277

Tuesday April 9

Maja got back late last night and we’re straight out the next night, which is tonight.

Another Ramshackle Collective at Ten To One, and damn those comedians are really upping their game. Even jokes we’re familiar with are starting to sound new. Routines are being honed to the point where, in a few cases, what were whole sections of an act are now just two or three lines. Even throwaway lines. This is crafting happening almost in real time in front of your eyes. It might also help that we haven’t been here for a few weeks, so improvements and changes become even clearer. But this is far and away the best evening we’ve had in here so far and they’ve all been great. But really, two or three acts in here tonight are better than acts that have been part of events I’ve paid to see. One of them closes tonight’s show, which means we don’t. But then, we didn’t say we were definitely coming and this guy was here first and got to be given the privilege so absolutely fair enough. His name is Baron Fortitude and he’s here prior to his upcoming performance at the final of the UK Musical Comedy Awards. I can say now he didn’t place in the top three, but that only speaks to what must have been the overall quality of the whole lineup.

As it is, we get to close the second section of tonight’s show and we do so with Freefall, How You Rock’n’Roll and Six Sense Lover. Den is great at introducing everyone and bigging them up and making sure they get a great and welcome reception and reaction. For us, she hints at what might be coming by saying to an expectant audience, ‘Hold onto your hats. It’s The Diaries.’ With that, we’re up and running. Unfortunately, there’s no video of this one, not anything we’re going to put up anyway, because there’s just too much hustle and bustle in front of the camera which was in the only place we could put it. But that’s just a mark of how successful and popular this night is beginning to become so we’ll happily take that.

Day 284

Tuesday April 16

Another entry in what is becoming more or less our weekly report on our goings-on at The Ramshackle Collective at The Ten To One Club in Tottenham. Oh, Den steps up for us tonight. She really steps up for us tonight. I said a few appearances ago that our part in the evening felt like an event. Well tonight it steps up even more. We’re closing the evening again, which Den tells us almost as soon as we arrive which is just brilliant and hugely appreciated. Between now and then, we sit back and enjoy another evening of music and comedy, again seeing all kinds of development here and there. Then it’s our turn and the atmosphere just changes to electric. This is up there with the time we walked into The Pull Inn in Ireland to Now Hustle and everyone already knew who we were and the room exploded in excitement that The Diaries had just walked in off the street unannounced. 

Oh, that was special. Of course our last show at The Trap and one or two more there, especially the time it was almost demanded that we  play after that fantastic Status Quo tribute show. We’d just popped in for a quiet pint or two, unexpectedly found the place hopping with a great live show, joyfully throwing ourselves into that environment. When we found ourselves contributing to the whole thing as we performed our biggest, most demanded and anticipated show up to that point. I think tonight has to join that list as the cheering starts BEFORE we play. Of course it’s no new thing for people to be encouraged to clap and cheer and give encouragement for acts coming to the stage, and hosts will often exhort people to go wild and clap and cheer and generally give a big welcome for whoever’s coming next. But this is a whole different level to that. This feels spontaneous and just up from out of the air. And real. Another thing we’re starting to see in here is that when people are there for the first time, they’re being told, ‘You have to stay and see The Diaries.’ And more often than not, they do. As I said, the cheers and whistles are reverberating off the walls even as we’re taking to the stage. Then Den rises to what has suddenly become something of an occasion and, like a boxing announcer, waves her fist in the air and declares, ‘On the sixteenth of April twenty twenty-four, please welcome … The Diaries.’ And the place is just up for it. We don’t even have Ant in tonight, the main man who owns the bar and who often acts as something of a cheerleader for us. We’ve got quite a few people in here for the first time tonight and everyone, it seems, is just carried off and away on the wave that seems to build and veer up at the stage as we reach it. We hadn’t planned for this reaction, or preaction if you will, but what we had planned rises perfectly to the expectation that we are now very much under. To be fair, if we hadn’t planned this, we probably would have done our turnaround on a dime again and done something like this anyway. But Maja is ready. And so am I. ‘Go!’ she shouts. And we’re off and away. Into Make Me Shine. A few seconds into this and the hand clapping starts and cheers fly up into the air. This is a song that explodes into a double chorus, the very business end of the song springing up, instantly fully formed. But then after that, the verse kind of takes it into somewhere bigger again. When that first verse comes up, the excitement raises in the room again and the cheers and calls and claps come even more urgently. And so it is as we go through the other songs in tonight’s planned repertoire, running through Talk About The Weather and I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). With that, Den come on stage and declares another triumphant evening over. But Maja’s not having that. She calls out that Den has to close the evening with her own anthemic song Take Your Bra Off. We think that’s what it’s called. Which is a fist waving singalong celebration of the comfort women feel at the end of the day when they’re finally able to remove this uncomfortable thing. ‘Take your bra off/ Take your bra off woman/ Take your bra off/ Liberate your bosom.’ I told you she was big on the surreal social commentary. Well, surreal doesn’t quite fit here, but maybe a unique take on social commentary. This is another brilliant song in her repertoire and rounds the evening off perfectly. But this time, Maja joins her on stage and the two of them blast it out as they celebrate the joy that is to be ‘In In In!!’

All done and a general hang out begins as the various acts get to mingle a bit more and talk to each other. This is where all the detail swapping and future show arranging and general community happens. And in among it all we meet Gabriel, who’s done his own stand up in here for the first time, lighting the place up with a spontaneous sounding infectious energy and a captivating innocence while at the same time hurtling very quickly towards the edge. He’s running his own open mic on Thursday next week in Finsbury Park and would love us to come. This is on the route of the first of the two buses we take to get here. He says he’s already decided to make us the main event. Brilliant. Thankyou very much. We’ll be there.

And here is that show complete with fantastic reception and introduction from Den.

The London Diary: Camden, days 293 to 300

Day 293

Tuesday April 23

Mark:

I’m going to blast through this Tuesday night as we have our now regular outing to The Ramshackle Collective night at the Ten To One Cocktail bar in Tottenham. It’s amazing we’ve found a regular place to play and have been getting such brilliant receptions. That continues tonight although we begin a little slower than usual, opting for Sand Bang to get things started. Then How You Rock’n’Roll and I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Now we’re up for this Thursday with Gabriel’s thing.

Day 295

Thursday April 25

Mark:

We have no idea what we’re walking into tonight but oh, does it turn into an amazing experience. Quite a small bar in what appears to be a high end restaurant place specialising in desserts by day and a bar by night. Gabriel’s got a few of the performers to come down from the Ramshackle Collective night, a decent extra cast of performers, and not a bad audience turnout. This is in Finsbury Park, north London, just one bus away from us, which is also the number 29, one of the most regular buses in London so not far off from getting a taxi really.

Gabriel’s welcomes as people arrive are massively effusive and it’s really nice to see that we know a few people here, especially as we’ve arrived decently early to be able to  settle in and hang out. And he very actively encourages mingling, saying that one of the aims of the evening should be that we all leave with a new friend. I think we do, as me and Maja mingle and chat with different people all night. You really can just go up to someone or sit down at a table and bang, you’re chatting like friends. We’re getting a similar feeling with Ten To One actually, and Ant’s event with Tom in Walthamstowe a few weeks ago had a similarly inclusive vibe. Seriously, more bars should be like this.

Gabriel  comperes with his own fantastically high energy, also performing a little seemingly off the cuff and frenetic stand-up between each act. And he puts us on very much towards the end when atmosphere levels in here are about at their highest. When it comes to our turn, he addresses the audience and says, ‘Guys, you have no idea what you’re about to experience.’ And then our name. Yes, a little bemusement from quite a few people, but we’re ready. Poised, Maja calls out, ‘Go!’ With that, we smash into Make Me Shine and the place just takes off. Oh, they’re into this. Even the guys behind the bar are joining in. Yes, they all seem to be thinking. Gabriel was right. They were not ready for this. When the song finishes, the eruption of cheers and applause is so loud I almost want to cover my ears. Just enormous. And we keep it right up there as we follow with Talk About The Weather, then I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) which people are still singing long after we’ve finished. What a fantastic night. 

And here’s the whole thing from that night.

Day 300

Tuesday April 30

Tonight’s a little strange for us. It’s The Ramshackle Collective again and we’re feeling like it’s time to try new things. A new song to start tonight, or at least a new song for this venue. Maybe we’re complacent, maybe we’re tired, maybe we’re just a little off. But a few too many loose moments leave us feeling not completely the best about it all afterwards. But Ant says it’s his favourite show of ours he’s seen. And similarly we get a great reaction from Rick when he sees the whole video. One of the reasons for this is the freshness and originality of our entrance. We tell Den how we’re going to start so that we can have the stage prepped and ready. With that we go to the back of the room and wait for our introduction. When it comes, we slowly walk out and through the room, getting a clap going and then beginning with the A capella Bang Bang, a song we wrote the night before our first gig at The Trap, and then performed the next day at our first gig in The Trap. It’s just kind of fallen off our radar a bit, but Maja suggested today that we bring it back, and so we do.

We’re deep in and it’s all gone off as well as we could possibly have wished with everyone joining in the clapping and the two of us making our way down the bar and singing it out. Then I get to the stage, pick up the guitar, and bang out a rhythmic snare type sound to take things up just that tiny level more. The idea here is that we finish the last chorus then I immediately bash out the intro to the next song, The Cat which has a big frenetic guitar intro. Except we finish the last chorus and I somehow manage to forget that we’ve already done the last verse, so I pull us back into that again. It’s semi trainwreck territory as Maja realises what’s going on and hesitatingly comes in again. With us going through this last verse, it also means we now have to do another chorus to re-outro the thing. In all, a very messy end to what had been such a promising beginning. 

If I can plead any mitigation it could be that I just had too many other things to remember. Once on the stage, first I had to put the capo on the guitar so that it was ready for the first song. Yes I could have put it on earlier, but that would have meant a capo just clamped to immobile strings for up to half an hour or maybe more. Not ideal. But no problem to put it on just after arriving on stage. Except I also have to plug the wireless in because the guitar won’t sit on the stand with the transmitter plugged in. To do this I have to go to the mixing desk, check where the faders are from the soundcheck we did earlier so that we could make our big entrance. So I’ve checked where the faders are, I’ve then taken them to zero, plugged the wireless in and put the faders back where they were. All this while continuing to sing at the same time. Maybe it’s no surprise I forgot we’d already done the last verse. It’s just also possible that this bubble so soon in sets the tone for the rest of the performance. Either making us uneasy, shaking the confidence a little, or doing that thing where you make a mistake and dwell on it, or make a mistake and continue to try to make up for it, so get tense, or too conscious or something and, self fulfilling prophesies and all that, another mistake or two drops in and so on and all that. It’s not really that bad, but enough that we notice and the flow just might not be quite what we would want. 

But there’s a huge but after all this. Ant is emphatic afterwards that this has been our best show yet in his place. Then Rick sees the video afterwards and without any prompting, says that this is his favourite performance of ours. And he’s seen everything. Everywhere. Wow. OK. What do we know?

There’s one more mildly strange thing that happens. We’d entered with Bang Bang, taking that as one of our three songs. So we get up, play The Cat after that, Followed by Rock’n’Roll Tree. We finish Rock’n’Roll Tree and we’re kind of starting to set our stuff down. But no-one in the venue moves. There’s no call for an encore or anything, but everyone’s just looking at us in some kind of anticipation like we’re not done. This really feels like an encore without being an encore. Or maybe Bang Bang was just seen as our way of getting to the stage and so what we’ve done only counts as two songs. I have no idea. We hadn’t planned for this but that’s OK. Into this temporary corridor of uncertainty a call comes out for I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Well, what else can we do? If you’re privileged enough to have a song requested, there’s only one thing you can do. Here we go.

We do get video of all this, but so far we haven’t put any of it up. Only private so that it’s there for us to show people maybe, which is how Rick saw it. He knows us well, knows our songs, is a very experienced performer and writer himself so knows what he’s watching and how to listen to and watch things properly. So that’s all fine. But this one for public consumption? Not so sure. As we’ve seen, the performances are off with at least one big mistake and clear stage confusion – not good at all – and also with the way we made our entrance, we tried to film the angle down the bar as we came in, and then Maja tried to move the camera angle to the stage as she reached it, but some objects on the table got in the way and she was concentrating on singing and looking at the camera image and stage, and with a microphone in one hand, only had one hand free as it was. And of course very limited time because this was supposed to be an instant operation. So that fiddling is going on and then the framing of the stage isn’t all that good either as a result. So yeah. Probably won’t be putting this one up. But, from what we gather, the experience of the show in the room was really good. The best yet, as we heard from Ant. That can be the case at times with live performances. There are even cases of famous live albums from major bands being received really quite negatively from people who know what they’re talking about. The line of thought here often goes that it’s possible the experience in the room at the time was so good that the decision makers decided to put that show out; the experience from the stage, and the experience of those in the room can be amazing, you want to share it with the world, then the cold hard reality of hearing the recording can be something quite different. It happens. It’s also why so many of the live albums you hear are fixed after the performance in the studio, just as you would patch in and fix a mistake in an actual studio recording. Yep. For big big productions which are intended as live albums, all the instruments are tracked as though in an album recording, and then individually fixed afterwards. So if you’re in a band, the next time someone says something like, ‘Can’t you rock out and play or sing without mistakes? XXX band/ musician/ vocalist does it on their live albums/videos, go listen.’ Well guess what. XXX band/ musician/ vocalist didn’t. It just sounds like they did. Well of course sometimes they probably did to be fair, but you know where I’m coming from. But no, of course this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t all practice or rehearse to minimise live mistakes. I guess it just means we should be a little kinder to ourselves and others when they do happen.

The London Diary: Camden, day 304

Day 304

Saturday May 4

Oh damn, where to start? I’m kinda coming right up to date at the beginning here because it’s now the beginning of July 2024 and we’ve written nothing in here since April 30, meaning we missed the landmark Camden day of 300. The simplest catch-all reason for this is that for the better part of two months, life has just got in the way a little. Well, not a little at all. We’ve really been thrown right off any kind of track and have had to spend quite a lot of time dealing with things way outside of music and private enough that they really don’t belong in these pages. That may yet change, but for now we’ll keep all that where it is. But we’ve been essentially good and doing well through it all and continued to have nights out here and there, just nothing particularly to write about. Apart from the drama which we’re not. Yet. Sorry. During that time, musicwise we’ve mostly just made sure to at least keep going to the Ramshackle Collective on Tuesdays at the Ten To One bar in Tottenham, which has been our touchstone although one or two did get missed. When we first started doing this, we saw it as a gentle but solid way to get ourselves back in after another previous period of relative inactivity due to life getting in the way at that time as well. It then became a way to keep in touch with our music while everything else was falling out of touch. But apart from all that, it’s a great bar, Ramshackle is a great night which we really look forward to, and we’re just really connecting with the bar in general, a lot of the other acts that play there although we’ve not been writing much about that either, and Ant and Den in particular. That would be bar owner and Ramshackle organiser respectively. 

Also, when we first saw that Ramshackle could be a regular enough thing for us, we had a thought that it could help us stay in live performance shape while we tried to get back to the debut album which, yes, we’re aware, is dragging on a bit. But yeah. Even that plan got thrown for a whole other while. Thinking it was time to concentrate on recording also meant holding back on pursuing other venues, while remaining open to opportunities should they arise. All again to save Maja’s voice and energies so that she could concentrate on the album, while still getting the live work in to keep developing and maintaining our stage muscles, stamina and just general performance levels individually and collectively. So, relative inactivity and a massive chunk of Diary consisting of mostly just Tuesdays has been the overall result. Regarding that determination to continue to play live, in however limited a way, through all of this, I came across a great quote recently which I’m not getting quite right, but I am capturing the central point: If you rehearse a lot you’re practising rehearsing and so you get great at rehearsing. If you play live a lot you’re practising playing live and so you get great at playing live. 

Yes, we still do the rehearsing thing, especially in trying to introduce so many of the songs we have which have yet to make it to the stage. But rehearsal alone really doesn’t come close to what you get by regularly putting yourself on a stage and having to do your thing in front of an audience that needs to be entertained. 

All that said, we do have a really cool thing going on today as we’re heading off to our favourite Ten To One bar again to play a livestream on the Japanese Niconico platform. The first purpose of this is to do a full 45 minute rehearsal to see if we really can keep up the energy of our biggest smash set songs for that amount of time. This is something we’ve never attempted before and we have an imminent 45 minute show in here, for which we’re hoping to get the date confirmed today. So this is us doing our thing on stage, really going for it gig style, while taking the opportunity to livestream ourselves on stage in a venue, with the doors closed, so this is ours until opening sometime early afternoon.

This is just an enormous thing that Ant has allowed us to do. To come here, with the bar closed, to do this and really stretch out and perform on stage as though it’s for real. We’re lucky enough that we can rehearse pretty much properly at home, a real luxury for apartment living in London. But to really blast it out full throttle for this long? And bounce and hammer the floor and dance to the rhythms like you would in a real show? No. That really would be taking too much of a liberty. 

In all the time of The Diaries, we’ve played very few full sets, and for where we are, 45 minutes does constitute a full set. And those we have played, we didn’t yet have the full repertoire of up and at ‘em songs we have now so we did have opportunities to drop off the intensity. So this really is a test for us and an opportunity for us to see where we really are with our own gig stamina. Can we properly keep up our customary sprint for that long?

Answer: Yes we can. Damn this is a good workout and a truly great in-situation rehearsal. Even better, Den’s come along to the bar this morning. And with Ant having to be away until we’re almost done, she’s our sole live audience member for our first real go at playing this many big songs in the same set. We also manage an audience of around 60 to 70 online which really isn’t too bad either, especially as we’ve just up and done it and not put out any mention at all. Among those are one or two people who have seen previous livestreams, so returning spectators. Even better. And among the comments that come in – with Maja translating of course – is one saying that we should be playing The Toyko Dome, which is an actual stadium. I’m sure there’s a lot of politeness in that comment, but still. Oh, and that 60 to 70 figure. We also discover afterwards that our feed was glitching quite badly so that would have put a lot of people off. Understandably. It would certainly put me off. So without that, maybe we would have done even better regarding numbers.

After we’re all done, we have a chat with Ant and we confirm a date for our show here of Thursday June 6. It’s a full evening in which we also have to choose two acts to play before us. So yeah. Our first London headline show all booked and ready to go.

Some more may well be going up, but for now, here’s a look at one of the songs from the Japanese stream. Rock’n’Roll Tree.

The London Diary: Camden, days 307 to 335

Day 307

Tuesday May 7

A slightly unusual set choice tonight at Ramshackle as we decide to repeat what we did last week with the Bang Bang/ Sand Bang intro. Not a massively attended night tonight which does reduce the impact a little of this kind of entrance and on the ensuing video, but really good to have got this in the can so to speak. Also, on watching it back before posting in here, not massively sure about the tempo clapping at the beginning. It’s great everyone joins in but it doesn’t lend itself to clapping throughout the whole thing so that element kind of tails off somewhat. Something to think about for future outings of this combination should we do it again anytime.

We follow this up with two big smash set songs – the heavy metal-ish My Game My Rules and the very punkish The Cat. A proper barnstorming end to another great evening at The Ramshackle Collective at The Ten To One Bar.

Day 315

Wednesday May 15

We gave the regular Tuesday night a miss last night because we were both a little under the weather. We’re going to be missing next Tuesday’s as well. 

Day 323

Thursday May 23

Which brings us to today. Den messages to say that the next coming Tuesday is almost full with just one spot left. Do we want it? Oh yes. We very much do. After two in a row missed, we have already been feeling so up for it for next week. It’s also really, really cool to be asked for in this way so we are not going to pass that up at all. We will be there. It’s also an opportunity for us to start getting the lineup together that we’re going to play with in our first full London headline show in here on June 6. We need two support acts and we’d love Den to come along with us and open. And after that, we had the idea of getting in touch with my old friend and cover duo partner Dan to come along and do a set of his fantastic bouncing, dreaming, soulful originals. I’m really happy to report that both are very up for it and, with that, we have our lineup.

Day 328

Tuesday May 28

Which leads to tonight. One of the best in here so far, if not the best. Wonderfully attended with a fantastically responsive crowd and a night when everybody really brings their A game. Including a guy called Jeb from Canada who’s in London for just two days and has decided to come here and play one other arranged show somewhere, I’m sorry I can’t remember. And a singer/songwriter called John who’s come to London from Nottingham, about 130 miles away, just to play The Ramshackle tonight. Well, to have a day out in London while he’s here as well, but ostensibly just to play here. Ladies and gentlemen, this is where this thing is getting to now. We ourselves have gone and played open mics in different countries and have marvelled at the end of the night when they’ve brought out their regular person to play last, thinking what a cool and privileged position that is to have. Now we’re that thing to people when they come to England and to London to play.

Day 335

Tuesday June 4

You could be forgiven for thinking we’re currently doing Ramshackle and absolutely nothing else all week every week. Live, at least, that has been the case to be fair, but we have also been out and about here and there. Sometimes just on a hang in various bars, but in some bars we’ve been gently showing our presence and generally making ourselves known, mostly in Camden. It’s just that so far, nothing much Diaryable has happened. It’s more a case of if and when we do manage to get into any of those venues, we could at that point recount the story of how that happened. A lot of this is due to my own (Mark) deep distrust of ‘promoters’ at grassroots level and a reluctance to get involved with them, so we’re trying to make it our own way. And we’ve said between ourselves that if there was a good, well connected local music scene with local bands really thriving, we would have just found it by now. I think it’s existing somewhat, but in pockets and dotted about venues more than as an actual movement or scene. The general way a ‘promoter’ ‘works’ at grassroots level is to sign up bands for their shows and then sell them tickets for them to sell on. Or to tell acts they must commit to bringing a certain number of people, usually between ten and thirty. In this, they often state that if the act fails to deliver that number on the night they won’t be able to play. The thing is, even if you are able to bring thirty of your friends, how do you then play another show within even three months if this is the only criteria under which you can play? Even if they do come to your show three months later, you can’t bank on them at all for any show after that. They’ve done their bit. They’ve seen you play. Maybe satisfied their curiosity. But again and again? Not realistically. Not outside the most loyal friend or family member. And yes, in this model, a promoter or venue will often stipulate that an act can’t play another gig within a certain radius of their venue two months before or after. Moving cities now, but I once tried to book a gig for my blues band in Madrid. I actually managed to pitch an owner and we were on to talking about dates. Then he asked where else we were playing. I very proudly told him of a gig or two we had coming up and that was that. The conversation was over and he just walked away from me. All of which explains what I’ve observed anecdotally, which is that promoters will book grassroots bands from way out of town. Why? Because it becomes their big gig in London and the whole family and the rest go on the trip with them. And that makes up almost their entire audience. But if this is your big gig in London and the only people, or 95 per cent of the people in your audience are people you’ve brought from your home town or city, have you even played in London at all? Well, I suppose you categorically, geographically have. But played to London? Hardly at all. You might as well have just put your house or local pub on the back of a lorry, brought it all the way here and played in that.

I think at this stage we also have to have a look at the general economy and state of play in London. Bottom line, the price of drinks has just gone too high that so people aren’t casually going out to gigs as they once would have done and so those very types of gigs have really tailed off. More than my own anecdotal experiences, I’ve seen this case stated a few times by venue owners saying the very notion of a grassroots scene is close to being financially untenable. I know we’re a few years on now, but a lot of venues didn’t survive the pandemic. And on that, even many of those that did, only survived because they were bought up by multi-national bar companies who were able to ride out the situation until the bar could be opened and become a viable business again. But of course, under such management, it wasn’t going to be an independent venue anymore. Sure the managers can still put on gigs if they want, but those gigs need to make the bar money and immediately. There’s no, ‘Oh, let’s put something on and see what happens,’ or, ‘Let’s see if we can build something here.’ No. It pretty much has to financially deliver on day one or not at all. So they do the not at all thing. That’s a totally understandable business model, but when it’s almost the only game in town, it means there almost isn’t a game in town.

All of which is why grassroots music and entertainment needs people such as Ant and bars such as Ten To One more than ever, and further to that, people like Den and her Ramshackle Collective night encouraging people to come out and play and watch and generally participate. And on this subject you absolutely have to include Tommy at The Marquis. Damn. That place has slipped off our radar a bit, but that, for us, is more a life getting in the way kind of thing which you may be aware has been quite a bit a bit of a thing in the past few months. We haven’t been the best communicators with Tommy in that either to be fair and I’m not entirely sure how that develops moving forwards but yes, it would certainly be nice to get something moving there again. We have been in a few times just for a drink or two. But as you’ll see over the next period, with this being written around six weeks behind, other things are maybe, just maybe, starting to develop for us meaning we really haven’t had as much opportunity to go, at least not during quieter days or evenings. We have been a few times in the past few months on Friday or Saturday nights and it’s been great. But that also means it’s been full on busy with the tunes really kicking off from their fantastic vinyl selection. Not really the best time to be trying to get the attention of the manager for a chat about things. 

Which brings us back to our regular Tuesday night at The Ramshackle at The Ten To One Bar. Another really fun night but a small audience for this one. It can go up and down. We’ve not even put out anything from tonight. For some reason we didn’t get a great sound on the recording, the audience is a bit quiet on it because it was one of those quiet nights, and our performance was a bit rough and, well, ramshackle. But hey, we’re still getting out there and doing our thing and developing as performers. And that, really, is what it is all about. Now we’re ready for our next thing. Our first full show in London when we get up and do our thing for a full 45 minutes. And that’s happening in here, in The Ten To One Bar in two days time on June 6.

The London Diary: Camden, days 337 to 354

Day 337

Thursday June 6

All very cool as we play our first headline show in London today with that 45 minute set in Ten To One. And yes, we go with exactly the same set we dress rehearsed in the Japanese live stream we did in this same venue a few weeks ago. Den is in here to open for us tonight, and I’m also reunited with Dan tonight who is going to go on second with his own set of originals. It’s really great to hear those songs live again. Brings back a few memories of when it was me and him going round playing full cover sets, but also every now and again going off to play an open mic to bash out a few of his. A few real gigs with those as well. And here they are tonight. Beforewhich we get to hear a whole load of Den songs which we haven’t heard before and it’s an absolute joy of nostalgia and surreal whimsy. Even a comical zombie song. What else?

And then we get to do our thing and for the first time he gets to hear us do our thing which I’m really pleased about. And we really do smash it out. But unfortunately, not the greatest of turnouts with Ant saying there was a party in here tonight which a lot of locals came to so it’s unlikely they’ll be in here again tonight. And no they aren’t. We’re assured that this won’t be the case next time. Because once we’re done, Ant says he’s really up for doing this regularly with us. Every two or three months or so. Oh wow. Just like that we have a regular full gig.

Grassroots gigs. Small audiences can happen. It’s a thing and part of what you buy into so that’s fine. You hope to build on the smallest of beginnings. That’s what it’s all about. The real minor downside from tonight is that we get no useable video. That’s because there’s one table in here that just constantly talks all the way through. And loudly too. Also kinda close to where our camera is set up. On the video it just sounds like they’re totally competing with us all night. Through every single song. For the full duration of every single song. Even during applauses they continue shouting across their table at each other, completely oblivious to the fact that there’s a gig going on in here. Oh well. It’s a public bar, they have every right to use it as they please. But…please. The thing is, there are two back areas they completely could have taken over if they’d wanted. It would have been quieter and therefor easier to talk in those places and they still could have heard the show if they’d wanted it to be a kind of background to their own thing. But no. They had to sit in the middle of the audience and right near our camera and do it. So yeah. No useable video from our first London headline. Shame. Thanks guys.

Day 339

Saturday June 8

One of those kind of lovely days we haven’t been massively Diarying so I thought we’d get one in here. We decide to take a walk into Soho. From our apartment in Camden, a brisk walk can get us there in about half an hour. Once there we head into Chinatown where we find a nice Korean restaurant for ramen. Then another walk down the street sees us discover a great sports bar for the main event of the day. The women’s French Open final. Which we get to see in our new discovery Clubhouse 5. A just about everything sports bar which has a variety of sports on all its TVs downstairs, and has dedicated its entire upstairs area to today’s final. Result. 

Day 349

Tuesday June 18 

Maja was away with work last week so we didn’t do our Tuesday Ramshackle thing. We’re back tonight though, and with a brand new song. Till Sunset Burns. This is not one of our explosive songs. Instead it’s a slow burning, almost singer/songwritery thing which winds its way into an epic chorus, hits a few patches of light and shade, and then launches into a huge, wandering and building outro which rises to quite a few different peaks. It’s a really good feeling to have a new song worked in and in the actual live repertoire now, and it gets a very encouraging reaction. We’ve got a lot of new songs to come, of many different styles. Slow burns like this one, a few big ballady type things, a few out and out rockers and, frankly, metallers, and a few of the happy-go-lucky whimsical type. 

Day 353 

Saturday June 22

We get a message from Gabriel today asking if we’re interested in playing the bar of his friend Anna, who we also met when she came to his event that we played a few weeks ago. We spoke to Anna about this bar at Gabriel’s event and there was talk of us playing it at some point, maybe. Well, here we are. Brilliant. We get right back and say yes, absolutely. We’d love to. It’s put in the diary for Friday July 19 at bar Cava-Ri in Norbury, south London. So that’s a trip across the river to play a gig. That will be the first time that’s happened.

I’ll cover this bit now. We see the bill a week or so later and it looks really interesting. A comedian, a belly dancer, a compere duo featuring Gabriel, and ourselves. This looks like a really cool event to have been asked to be a part of.

Day 354

Sunday June 23

Me and Maja have been playing pool every now and again at a few bars in Camden. And Maja’s also been recently introduced to snooker on the TV, mostly with the world championship final a few weeks ago in May. We got to talking about snooker and she said she’d really like to try it. Even if just the once. Just to see a real table. Maja’s never seen a full size snooker table.

At a Ramshackle event one evening a while ago we mentioned this to Ant in conversation and he was like, ‘I play snooker all the time. Give me a call sometime and we’ll arrange it.’ Wow. Did not see that coming. So yesterday I messaged him to see if he was up for it today and he was. Which is how we’ve now come to find ourselves in a snooker hall in Finsbury Park, a place he comes to regularly. He leads us in, asks for his usual table and we go out the back of the bar to enter an old style theatre type venue. We’re not going in there though. Instead, we take a side door which leads to a staircase, and upstairs a large room containing four full size snooker tables. And we have the place all to ourselves. Maja gets a brief introduction to the basic rules, which is pot a red, then a colour – black if it’s on as that’s worth more – then a red and so on until you stop when you reach a score of 147. Although that last part might be for the slightly more advanced players. For the likes of us, I warn Maja that the pockets are lot more unforgiving than what we’re used to in pool. If the ball isn’t headed directly to the centre of the pocket, it’s probably not going to go in. There’s very little rattling in off the jaws like there is in pool. 

Rather than winner stays on or anything like that – because games of snooker can take ages – we’re all going to play in the same game, taking it in turns around the three of us. Ant breaks, because he knows how to and it’s a good opportunity to introduce us to that element. He does it expertly, gently separating a few reds from the triangle while bringing the white all the way back down the table to near where it started. Maja’s up next. Now, I’ve played a fair amount of pool with Maja, including on a few tables we’ve found around the bars in Camden. She’s not the best. And now here she is taking on snooker. With the nearest available ball far further ahead than the longest pool table she would have played on. The white is somewhere around the still spotted green and brown. She bends down to the table and gives it a good whack in what looks like the general direction of a loose red sitting off to the left central side of the pack, somewhere between the zones of the pink and black. Not only does the white smash the red with full force, the the red then goes bounding off to make that lovely snooker whacking sound to go directly into the bottom corner pocket. Maja’s first ever shot on a full size snooker table and it’s one that would have been applauded in The Crucible. For those not into snooker at all, that’s the traditional venue for the world championships, and having to explain that has forced me into a somewhat unsatisfyingly clunky ending to a wonderful little anecdote. It’s a shot that causes all three of us to reverberate in wonder and takes a few shots to calm down from. Not those kind of shots. We have a serious game going on here. But seriously, I think we could all just call it a day and go home there and then. Peak reached. Job done. There’s only one star of today’s outing.

But we stay and put in a few really fun frames with Maja, if not quite pulling of that level of shot again, sinking a few very respectable more balls nonetheless. Who knew a low to middling clumsy – if we’re being fair – pool player could come and boss it like a natural on a snooker table? She has snooker veteran Ant quite speechless quite a few more times today, but never moreso than that first shot. Sorry for going on about it, but I think it’s one of the most remarkable moments of sport I’ve ever seen, certainly among friends. 

That wonderful little adventure done and we’re off for Sunday part two, which is to find a lovely pub in the area and have a beer garden Sunday lunch and a few early evening summer beers. Which we also achieve quite spectacularly. Yes. This is a Sunday that’s been totally Sunday’d.

The London Diary: Camden, days 363 to 375

Day 363

Tuesday July 2, 2024

Out for our regular Tuesday today and we can now add another regular to our dates. Regular comedian and very much friend of the Ramshackle Antonio asks us if we’re interested in doing a gig with him every Monday. Wow. Yeah. OK. This is to be a comedy night in Highbury, north London. The idea is for us to play in between the various sets of comedians he books for each night. Brilliant. For a long time we’ve been thinking we would be a good matchup with a comedy night. This was part of our thinking when we went to the Edinburgh Festival where we managed one great night of performance but drew a blank absolutely everywhere else. But now here in London, almost a year to the day since then, we have become a booking for a comedy night. Brilliant. Oh, and the venue is just two train stops away from us on the overground from Camden, which itself is super close to us. Less than 20 minutes door to door.

As for tonight, we’re back after missing last week and we decide to give new song Till Sunset Burns another runout. It really is good to be starting to get some of the new ones out now. We have quite a few waiting in the wings to get their own starts sometime in the coming weeks and months.

Day 368

Sunday July 7

Second time out with Ant playing snooker today. Brilliant. This time we don’t have the upstairs venue to ourselves. Which was lovely last time, but today there’s a bit more of an atmosphere in here, even with just two or three other people, which is its own kind of special. And one of the regulars in today is having his own practice session which he invites Maja to join. Which means me and Ant get on with having our own game while Maja gets to learn from a snooker jedi. ‘Watch out,’ says Ant. ‘She’ll be kicking all our arses by the time she’s finished over there.’ Yes, she does indeed return to us armed with a whole new set of skills. And given the rate at which Maja learns, there may well be a bit of snooker related kicking going on around here soon. After this it’s onto a local pool hall for a totally different experience. There must be around 20 tables in here, all buzzing with games and fizzing with shots. To that we add our own. And after battling the huge wide expanses of a snooker table all afternoon, rather than making any great claim to cue mastery, I think it’s at least fair to say this is very much like running on a road after training on sand.


Day 369

Monday July 8

The first of what is now set to be what we do on Mondays. Yep. The Diaries’ first residency. This is a free comedy show in a really cool community hall type venue above The Brewhouse and Kitchen bar in Highbury. Normally when you say above a bar you think a place up a bunch of stairs and kind of secretly hidden away. This isn’t like that at all. Instead, it’s fully up front as you enter the beer garden that you have to walk through to enter the bar proper. As you do, if you look up you’ll see a glass fronted room which is reached by a staircase from the beer garden itself. So, very open and not at all secretive. However, there is another way to reach it and, having missed the front entrance, we do indeed go through the bar. To be directed to a staircase at the back of what really is quite a large bar. Up that staircase we go to find a long, dark corridor. Still no sign of any venue. So we sheepishly venture down the corridor wondering exactly where it is we’re heading. Of course, there’s only one thing to say, nay, shoutout, fists aloft, in such a situation. And yes, we do. ‘Hello Cleveland. Hello Cleveland.’

End of the corridor and we still haven’t found anything. Just a door leading to the open air. Oh. OK. But oh. We step outside to find ourselves on a balcony overlooking the beer garden. Behind us is a glass frontage and what looks to be something of a venue. I do believe we’ve found it. Yep. Here we are and there’s Antonio and his co-host and drag performer Rubynia. Welcome to The Funny Brewer. 

Not massively attended tonight, but a good smattering of comedians and a few friends that have come along with them. There is a bar up here, but it’s unused so we’re all kind of on our own and it’s set up as a seated venue, all in rows facing the performance area. Behind this Antonio has set up a projector onto which the name of each performer is displayed behind them as they do their thing. Brilliant. Everyone has their own backdrop. So no, this is not an open mic, instead it’s a curated evening with everyone having been booked, and ourselves in there introduced by Antonio as the headliners. Yep. We’ll take that.

Right from the beginning we’ve said that we’ll play to 10 people like it’s ten thousand. Damn, we’ll play to one person like it’s ten thousand. Antonio has exactly the same mindset. The lights go off, the music comes on. Then he’s on the prowl, walking up the aisle in between the seats, a big welcome through the speakers from Rubynia behind him, so we hear, ‘Now please, welcome to the stage, Antonio Fadda.’ And here he comes. Just like he’s walking through his own comedy club full of hundreds, maybe even thousands, of cheering spectators all seated in thrilled expectation of a great night full of never before seen wonders. This is the image you need to project. As people are watching you, could they imagine you on the big stage? In the stadium? In front of a baying crowd, on your side or not? Because if you come out meek, that’s all they’re going to say. No, they could never cut it in a real arena. Or they just won’t see it. But come out and own the place? That person might be thinking, ‘You know, maybe. Just maybe.’ Or even, ‘Oh yes. I can see this now.’ Hundreds. Thousands. This is just what it would look like. And yes, this person could be up there doing it. Yes, I see them on the stadium stage, or walking among the aisles of the huge comedy club.’ Maybe they even imagine it as they’re watching them up there doing their thing. I’ve seen it myself at a few tiny open mics. Two particular performers come to mind. One was the first time I’d ever seen it. On the stage in the tiny upstairs venue at Fred Zepellins in Cork, Ireland. He  came out and, seriously, I could have sworn the guy was on a west end stage and had projected his hologram to us little mortals who could only make it to an open mic in Ireland. The other was Sally in Madrid. The first time I saw her on a tiny stage in a basement bar that looked like a cave – at Triskells incidentally – I thought, ‘I’m watching her at Wembley. She is on the Wembley stage right now.’ A little while later, quite a while later, she was the singer in my blues band.

And now this is Antonio. Right here. Fully formed. Already huge, no matter the size of the audience. Rubynia is also very game in this environment and fully puts it out there in the staple of the drag queen. The lip sync performance.

A few comedians do their thing, Antonio compering between them, then it’s our turn. What’s been decided is that we’ll play during the break. So, comedians on. Then us. Then on with the show. Problem. And I really did see this coming. We’re in a room upstairs with a non-functioning bar. The real bar is downstairs. The toilets are also at the end of that very long corridor we came down and it’s not ideal to sneak out to the toilet at a sit down comedy show. So as soon as the end of the first half is announced and it’s our turn. Yep. You know what’s coming. Everybody leaves. Everybody. Remember I said we’d play to one person like it was ten thousand? Well, ta daaa.

That one person is Rubynia who very graciously stays behind and takes in our entire performance of four songs. Not only that, but she really fully gets into it. I like to think that we have something to do with that and it’s not just pity reactions. I really don’t think so. As we get to the end, people are starting to come back, and when we finish our fourth and final song, there are big shouts for encore. Well, as big a shout as four people can make. What can we do? Can’t let down our public. That wouldn’t do. Wouldn’t do at all.

Hello Cleveland…

When it’s all over, myself, Maja, Antonio and Rubynia all stay behind and have drink in the now empty(er) venue. It’s a great setting and really quite dramatic. This could well be the beginning of a movie and I make that point as we’re sitting there. Newly cleared venue, still brushed with the sparse detritus of an audience. Chairs scattered and musical and stage equipment half put away. And us sitting at a table we’ve pulled to the back/front? of the venue so it’s now at the long wall to wall windows looking out onto the balcony and Highbury high street beyond. We tell each other it’s all a really good show. Just needs to be found by an audience. There’s also a rethink of our half time show. Not quite The Superbowl was it? It’s decided that instead of playing the interval next time we’ll be integrated into the actual show itself. Not fully thought out yet, but the direction of thinking is that we’ll play two songs at the end of the first half, then two songs to bring the second half back in. Yep. Sounds good.

Day 370

Tuesday July 9

So this is two regular gigs now. Out at Highbury on Mondays, then in at Ramshackle on Tuesdays. Yes, Ramshackle is an open mic, but we feel we’ve adopted it as so much more and that does feel mutual.

And oh, we just missed out on Ramshackle and Ten To One being our 100th gig. Tonight is gig number 99.

But.

First, it’s happening on the ninth.

Second, someone in here has a birthday tonight and they’ve brought along a cake to share with everyone. It’s a flake cake. The flake is the chocolate bar used to make a 99.*

Third, we get our 99th follower on Instagram.**

*I always thought it was called a 99 cos it cost 99p. But I’ve just looked it up and this thing was first put together in the 1920s when it couldn’t possibly have cost 99p. And no-one knows where the name does come from. Theories apparently include two different addresses where the first ones were constructed – 99 Portobello Street in Portobello, Scotland, and 99 Wellington Street in Manchester. Maybe they cost a penny or something like that back then. Four quid or more now. But inevitably, at some point between those prices it would have cost 99p. Which I seem to remember them being when I was a kid.

**Our 99th Instagram follower is comedy drama performer, Marigold. She’s taken an excerpt out of her one woman stage act as an isolated performance for open mics and the like. When she says she’ll do the follow thing, we have no idea we’re at 98. Oh, and I should mention that our relatively low number of followers could be attributed to us having only recently re-picked up on actually using Instagram. We’ve also quite possibly not been as active as we could have been.

The only thing we were possibly missing tonight was red balloons.

But…

Day 375

Sunday July 14

We’re back in at Ten To One tonight. Not to play, but to watch the soccer Euro 24 final. Which somehow and incredibly, England have made it to. The colours of the English flag are red and white. We enter the bar tonight and it is full of…

Drum roll

Drum roll

Drum roll

Red balloons.

For the second Euros in a row, England make it to the final but lose. Still, fun to be making it to finals. Before the last Euros, and with the glorious exception of 1996, England’s record in this competition had been disastrous to mildly acceptable. Now they’ve helped us mark gig number 99. Now, onto 100.

The London Diary: Camden, day 383

Day 383

Monday July 22

I’m about to do that thing we do every now and then when a whole bunch of time gets thrown out in one entry. That can sometimes be for reasons of catchup and sometimes for reasons of, well, not a great deal of difference has been happening for a while. Here, we’re just about in the middle of those two scenarios. 

I’m writing out loud here and thinking we may just cover the whole next period in just one entry which would be about two months. An actual daily entry or two may make its way in. Let’s do this little next bit together and see how we go.

First, I’m just going to throw in a whole load of Mondays and Tuesdays that we do. We’ve written about a whole bunch of Ramshackle events at The Ten To One Bar in Tottenham and we continue to do a whole bunch more of them. Ditto the Monday nights until late August when we start to think that we’re neglecting other opportunities and open mic nights and the like that we’ve never been to because, well, they happen on Mondays and Tuesdays too. So, not to stop entirely, and totally grateful for all the stage time and such we’ve been able to take on. We’ve also really felt a lot of much needed improvement and consistency through these events because, yeah, as we’ve said a couple of times, life has got in the way a little bit in a kind of non-Diary way meaning momentum and actual performance level has taken a few knocks. So having these regular Tuesdays and Mondays has been fantastic to pull ourselves back up while hopefully pushing the level on at the same time. But now yeah, a little step back to maybe see if we can take a step forwards. Or at least sideways. New thoughts of NOW Hustling are also starting to creep back onto our horizon. For one reason or another we’ve not done that in London. Just the once in Shoreditch and that was only because a planned gig fell through so we went off in search of another one, which we found in The Old Reliance with Mario. Oh damn yeah. That could be a good place to get back to.

I’m well aware this is going to sound a touch boasty or big headed but we’re saying it If anyway. We’ve been talking about it and we agree we’re kinda at the point where we have to announce from any stage that all the songs we’re playing are actually our own. Most of the time you see singer/songwriters play their own songs and you just know they are originals. They can be very good songs of course, but something inside you just knows they aren’t playing covers. Although I have seen some bands or solo people play songs I’ve thought were amazing originals and have then been sometimes, yes, heartbroken, to learn that they were indeed covers. Sometimes I’ve not learned that till years after the fact. Torn anybody?

We now know that sometimes people just assume the songs we’re playing have to be by famous people, or some unknown songs from somewhere that are in some way professional and/ or successful and we’ve just decided to play them ourselves. We’ve had instances of people coming up to us and making requests then recoiling in impressed shock when we tell them we’re not a cover act and that these are all our own songs. Again just a few days ago, someone completely matter of factly, as though of course nothing else could be the case, asked where we found the songs we played. She said, very politely and with no tone of accusation, more curiosity really, is it just that you listen to a lot of music, hear a song you like, learn it and start playing it. She almost fell off her chair when we replied simply, no. We wrote them ourselves. Happened again in another bar recently. The William IV in Hampstead actually. We’ll get to that. It might be one of those usual daily entry things now I’ve just reminded myself of it. Nice round of applause after our third song. Maja announces that all three have in fact been all our own songs and the place erupted. Yeah. People often assume we’re an acoustic cover act. Because, hey, there’s no way those songs aren’t already hits in some way, right? There’s now way those people up there we’re watching on a tiny stage in a regular bar could possibly have written them themselves.

We get it. It does make a kind of sense; over the past 20 years our music experiences and sourcing have become so increasingly fractured, personal, generational, any-other-kind-of-groupable, that even people totally in touch with many things media and entertainment can find that huge monster hits and totally otherwise stellar artists have somehow slipped and sailed quite loudly and proudly under their radar. I’m only vaguely aware Brat Summer exists. Is that even what it is? I didn’t check. It’s not like I have a computer, internet or a Google search anywhere handy as I’m writing this.

The London Diary: Camden, days 376 to 380

Day 376

Monday July 15

So, our hundredth performance has arrived and it is claimed by Antonio’s The Funny Brewer weekly Monday event at The Brewhouse And Kitchen in Highbury. Unlike our debut here last week which suffered from, let’s say, a scheduling mishap, this week we very much do have an audience and we are welcomed to the stage ecstatically.

We are setting tonight up just like it was suggested last week after we played in the break during which everyone, er, went on a break. So the format is an evening of comedians in two halves with us ending the first half with two songs and beginning the second half with two more.

And we hit this one hard, starting with Make Me Shine then blasting into I Like You (Better When You’re Naked). Then we come back with the latest addition to our set, Till Sunset Burns before rounding it all off with Rock’n’Roll Tree. The reception to everything is just incredible. A very fitting atmosphere for gig number 100. 

Day 377

Tuesday July 16

Maja’s up early for a work awayday tomorrow so we have to leave after the first half of tonight’s Ramshackle Collective. With that, Den accommodates us by letting us close the first half. 

Day 380

Friday July 19

After the excitement of our 100th gig and then Tuesday night, tonight we’re off for our third performance of the week. This is the gig Gabriel and Anna got in touch about a few weeks ago and it’s at a brand new venue for us – Anna’s bar Cava-Ri in Norbury. Which is in south London. Whole new territory for us – for those not familiar at all with London, it’s pretty much split by the River Thames on north south lines and it is totally a thing that those living north of the river rarely venture to the south of it, and vice versa. Apart from those from the south going to the city centre, the main commercial, tourist and political parts of which are on and around the northern banks. We have absolutely no idea what to expect. The poster advertises quite a substantial and varied bill with pictures included of all the acts, including us. We haven’t even seen the venue. We thought about going down a week or so ago to say hello, hang out, see what it was. But when we checked, it looked like a bit of a trek and we weren’t up for that so it didn’t happen. I wonder if it had been the same distance away but north, we would have gone? Oh we could have fun with that one. But we’re going there and playing it today so let’s get on it.

It really isn’t that bad a trip at all. From nearby Kings Cross, a fast, one-stop train takes us to Croydon, a bit further south than where we’re going. From there quite a few buses are going our way which means a really short wait for a bus that drops us off almost right outside the place. Oh. We’re on London Road. Cool. This is a small-ish but busy high street and we now see Cava-Ri and it’s a cool, bright, modern looking type place. Exactly what you would expect of a wine bar and restaurant, which is what it is. And it’s beautifully set out with its tiled floors and sharp, clean edges. A truly classy venue and minimalist without the minimal. Subminimal. In front is what looks like a Mediterranean garden scene, complete with artificial grass, and totally independent to any of its surroundings. Matches the weather. It’s warm tonight. So much so that hardly anyone is venturing inside. Meaning everything is going to happen out here in our own little piece of the Med, a la Norbury and san mer.

Anna is delighted to see us as we approach from across the road. She welcomes us with a warm embrace and the wonderful exuberance of the host that she is, and sees to it we get free drinks before we start to set up. The regulars, dotted about the garden area on comfortable plush chairs, also welcome us in and invite us to sit and mingle. A few hellos, then we have to think about the set up. It’s simple once we’re settled. This little garden runs the short length, or rather width, of the glass fronted venue. The outside runs about five or six metres or so out onto the pavement with its own little wall. We’re to play at the far end, essentially looking down the side of the place and playing to what we now think of as the back of the garden. We discover now that we’re going to play a couple of sets of three songs each. We have compere/comedian Gary, who will be joined later by Gabriel. We’re going to start it all off, then another comedian will play, then we’re on again, then the star of the show will be a belly dancer. OK. All fun. Let’s go. Gary gently opens proceedings with a warm, welcomingly familiar old skool comedy halls act injected with his own spin and personality. It’s an almost conversational performance, performer and audience as one. Then he announces us and we’re on.

We decide our opening tonight will be How You Rock’n’Roll followed by I Like You (Better When You’re Naked) and then closing the first set with Talk About The Weather. Everyone in front of us is kinda chilled, and we’re interrupted every now and then by motorbikes or police cars going past. But that all adds to the wonderful summer, outdoor vibe we have going here, playing our songs and rocking out with the wind in our hair. As we get into this short set, more and more people start paying attention. Then, as we get deep into Weather, Gabriel arrives and rises the excitement of the whole place, especially when we hit the shout it out loud mid section. Can you feel it/There’s a storm coming/Can you feel it/Through my hands I’ve got the rhythm it’s running. Yes. He’s totally into it and it looks like he’s starting to take a few people with him. It’s all starting to bounce now. 

When we finish, he comes straight up to us on the stage area and introduces us to the people who have been, I would say, politely curious rather than exuberant about us. That changes when we go back out to the floor and so many people want to say hello and tell us how much they enjoyed what we did. But until all that happens, it feels a little more rather reserved. Summer evening outdoor vibes and so on. Gabriel is absolutely effervescent and changes all that. Up and with us, he asks if he can take the mic and Maja obliges. Into it he declares, ‘That was The Diaries Ladies and gentlemen. They’re going to be famous.’ He then briefly interviews us before going into hypeman mode to call out, ‘Make some noise for The Diaries.’ And they do. We are here now. He continues his impromptu interview, making sure people know who we are, where we’re from and where they can find out more about us online. Talking to us through the mic he says: ‘I really think that they don’t know that you are going to be famous and in years to come they will be like, Oh wow, I saw them at Cava-Ri.’ He then asks if they could get one more out of us, but we then say we will be back a little later. He’s delighted with that answer and the three of us all leave the stage together and happily walk back into the summer’s evening, ice all well and truly broken. We’ve thought it before, but after this little bump it’s fair to say that Gabriel is quite possibly our biggest cheerleader in London and we are actually starting to gather one or two. What a wonderful thing that is to be able to say.

I think we did reasonably well in the mingling stakes before our trip to the stage. But now everyone’s seen us do our thing, and with the confirming storm of Gabriel’s intervention, we really start to get in among it and talk to a few people. Or rather, more people start to come and say hi to us and speak enthusiastically about what they’ve just seen and to ask more about what we’re all about. Brilliant. Anna’s visible enthusiasm about us has also clearly had quite a bit to do with all that. They’ll be seeing more of us up on stage later. In the meantime we all sit back and enjoy the wonderful comedy of Junior Booker, clearly a pro who would be high up on any bill you’d pay to get into. Gabriel’s saying we’ll be famous. I’m going to pay that forward and predict you’ll be hearing the name Junior Booker a bit more sometime in the future, although he already has a fairly healthy profile around London so I can barely claim to be ahead of the game on that one. After we’ve kickstarted everything, he raises it all to another level. After which Gary entertains us all for a little while again. Gabriel also gets up and does his thing. Huge personality fired effervescent comedy which is impossible to ignore. And we do our thing again. Make Me Shine, Rock’n’Roll Tree, and My Game My Rules. This leads to solid calls for an encore so we come back with The Cat. Now it’s time to sit back, by this time really among the people as we feel more and more at home, and wait to see what this belly dancing thing is all about as Chantel prepares for her entrance. And wow. What an entrance it is. I really won’t get all technical or anything about Eastern dress or belly dancing moves or anything like that, but this really is a full on visual assault of music, dance and pure athletic gymnastics. What a show. She’s everywhere. In between every table, over every chair, and making eye contact with everyone in the place, inviting us all in and making everyone feel, in their own little way, that this performance is just for them. It’s a whole experience and a fantastic show to close what has been a great evening. We stick around for a while longer, mingling as the atmosphere of excitement rumbles on. Everyone’s really been on their game tonight but Chantel has elevated things to a higher level still.

Until…

A few weeks later we bump into Gabriel out and about. He tells us that not only are people still talking about us at Cava-Ri, but he’s heard more about us than even the belly dancer, who we thought absolutely owned the place. Wow. We really did leave something out there in south London. And one more thing.

When it’s time to leave, after having had a wonderful time with Anna and Gary and so many of their regulars, I suddenly realise where we are. I mentioned that we came here via Croydon on a fast overground train from Kings Cross. Fine. But hey. We’re just down the road from Brixton. A main road all the way with a ton of buses heading down there. Surely it won’t take long for one of those buses to come along. It doesn’t and in no time at all we’re in Brixton. From there, it’s a short and simple tube ride to Camden and back home. Oh wow. If I’d figured that out a few weeks ago we totally would have come for that introductory look around and hang out. Well, now we know this, we tell ourselves we will be back again for a casual visit. Not at all the trek we initially thought. Even the Croydon way we came was convenient enough. But this. From Camden, a short hop to Brixton then just about any bus you want down the road to the bar. And we can combine it with a visit to the wonderful area of Brixton next time, which Maja hasn’t experienced yet. It really is a fantastic part of London and I’ve been saying for a while we should go. Now we have an extra excuse to do so. Which is the little plan we come up with now. A trip to Brixton, hang out there a little while, then onto Cava-Ri. Yep. We will see you soon. And thankyou very much for tonight. It has been a wonderful adventure and we got to be part of it all.

Oh. We got paid tonight too. Brilliant. Brilliant. Operating as an original music act, that takes things to a slightly different level. It’s also only when we’re on our way home that we reflect on the evening as a whole. Those performers were top drawer professionals. And we were booked on the same bill as them. Yep. A whole new London level. And we totally belonged.

One more thing. Unfortunately there’s hardly no useable video from tonight. For our first performance we had a few motorbikes and siren blasting emergency vehicles go bombing down the road right next to us. Then, with the streets slightly quieter for our second slot, our tripod got just a little tiny bit bumped just as we started. Which was enough to totally mess up the framing, putting just a little of me in the shot and absolutely none of Maja. But we do have Gabriel’s entrance and presentation of us to share with you. It’s not publicly available, but as you’ve been kind enough to stay with us this far, here you go.

The London Diary: Camden, days 418 to 423

Day 418

Monday August 26

Maja has a week off and we’re using it to get ourselves back into the studio to see if we can finally start to do some album damage. The concept of the album has kinda changed a little. Well, not exactly changed as such. Well, it’s like this. Yes it’s been a long time and yes there have been long periods of dormancy to be fair for some of the reasons a little outlined above. But while we have the twelve songs we’ve always intended to be on this debut album, no matter what other songs we’ve written and continue to write, we’re not going to wait until the whole thing is done before putting it out as one piece of work. Well, music and the whole concept of how music is released is changing anyway, and by default we’re fitting right into that. So yeah. What we’re planning now is as soon as a song is done, we’re just putting it out. When the next one is done, out that goes too. And so on until all twelve are out. At which point we can repackage the whole lot as the long (for us at least) awaited debut album HEᒐ. By then we’ll also have other songs ready to go; first of all, album number two is already completely written and album number three is practically all there too. Within that, a load of recording and pre-production has already happened. So yeah, although HEᒐ has been a long time in the coming, once it actually has emerged, we’ll be fully ready to rock’n’roll onto the next stage.

Day 423

Saturday August 31

Oh wow. Oasis has announced they’re getting back together to play a few huge shows. After that, who knows? Maybe by the time you’re reading this, you do. But this is Oasis doing their thing again. One of our touchstone bands. We have so many references to them and their lyrics in so many of our songs. Our first studio release, just out now, is full of them. You may know it if you’ve seen one or two of our videos. Rock’n’Roll Tree. For a start, it begins with the line ‘Some might say…’ Then the chorus, well, one of the choruses, it’s that kind of song, starts with, ‘And it shines,’ and ends with, ‘When you’re standing on the shoulders of what some might say/ In a sink full of fishes.’ And another of our most referenced bands, Oasis adjacent you could say, is also in there with three references in one tiny tiny section. ‘When he loves you all the more than yesterday/ You’ve got to let it be.’ An early version of the song ended with the last yeah yeah yeah echoing the final lines of She Loves You, but Maja deemed that just a bit too much. 

There’s some big furore about who’s going to be in the band. Will it be the original lineup? But really, the whole thing is about Liam and Noel getting back together. For me, it would be nice if Bonehead was there too, but as Noel has said many times, Oasis is the two of them and anyone else in the other slots. Apart from the original five, thirteen other people have been in Oasis over the years, making a total of 18. So if you’re not going to get the stone cold original Definitely Maybe lineup, and you’re not, what does it really matter? Yeah. It’s really all about Liam and Noel. And Bonehead (my opinion). Also for me, I’d love it if Guigs played bass. Would really truly love it if Tony McCarrol got up and played a song or two a la Steven Adler. I really don’t see it. But Bring It On Down would just be perfect. Just for that one song. To have the whole band back together. Again, I really don’t see it happening. But really for drums, it has to be Alan White doesn’t it? Although when I saw them it was Zak Starkey and he was amazing. Ringo Starr’s son. Bringing Oasis and The Beatles totally together. But really, after what follows in here, I think most people couldn’t care less who plays on the bill. After all the fuss and excitement, couldn’t care less anymore that this thing is even happening. We’ll get to that.

For now, this is a huge deal for Maja who’s never seen them. It’s still a big enough deal for me too, even though I have seen them. Twice. But to be fair, both those shows for me were in the later 2000s so no, I never saw them in their mid to late 90s prime. I almost, almost went to Glastonbury in 1995, just as they were approaching their zenith and just a few months before Morning Glory came out. And I still can’t figure out how I missed going to the epochal Knebworth. I was living near Manchester at the time, was all over the bar and club scene, and just about the only things you ever heard anywhere you ever went was Oasis and The Stone Roses. And yes, of course all the other Britpop stuff was bubbling around everywhere too. So how did Knebworth manage to pass us all by? By us all, I mean all my friends at the time too. Not only did I not go, but I don’t remember anyone talking about going to it. At all. Either before or after. I have no idea. But we’re totally on this reunion tour thing. 

The only problem is, half the world (away) and its mother also is. We do the whole thing. Register for tickets, get ourselves on the pre sale ballot, sign up with the ticket sites. That all happened yesterday in anticipation of sale day today. Oh, this is exciting. We were a little disappointed to miss out on the whole pre-sale thing but that’s OK. Up early this morning and let’s log on as soon as the sale begins. Oh, we’re so on this.

The only problem is, half the world and its mother also is.

First thing in the morning we’re in the queue. Guess what.

Yes.

You are number 126,879 in the queue. OK, I made that number up, but yes, deep in the hundred thousands. Oh OK. Let’s see how this goes. There’s what? Fifteen stadium shows across the UK to aim at. Of course we’d prefer Wembley Stadium, what with us being in London and all that, but we can spread it out, right? That’s the plan anyway if our chosen venue sells out by the time we get there.

Right now you might be thinking how long it takes to get to the front of a queue when you’re being well over a hundred thousand people. 

We don’t sit and stare at the screen and watch it happen, although yes we do keep up with it. More, we just get on with our Saturday hanging around the apartment, watching a movie and stuff, but making sure not to go out. We do need to at least stay on top of this thing. 

Now, to get to the answer of how long this takes. Around eight hours. Eight hours and we’re into single figure thousands. Which, bizarrely, feels like a really small queue. For a further hour we watch with some fascination as it winds through the thousands and then unbelievably into triple figures. Somewhere in the mid thousands we stop the movie ane watch, transfixed as it goes down, down, down. Triple figures, then double, then. Then. Then. Single. Actually single. Eight people in front of us. We’re at the computer and waiting. All required details at our fingertips. Then, incredibly, almost impossibly, it ticks down to just one. We’re up next. Yes, this is adrenilly. Then it happens. We’re in and we can select tickets. We’re actually in. Then it happens. What? What? What? Is our disbelieving reaction to what we see. The advertised price of around £150 per ticket has more than doubled and yeah, that 150 was damn high to begin with. But this is Oasis, Maja’s never seen them and they are kinda our band. A little more on that later. But for now, we’re absolutely stunned and Maja is heartbroken. No. Just no. We are not paying that. It was a stretch to start with. But this? Due to high demand they say. High demand? High demand? The biggest band of their era, the defining band of their era, has got back together after 15 years of, it will never happen, and demand took people so much by surprise that the prices had to go up? No. Just. NO. An absolute disgrace. An absolute farce. Never have I seen so much goodwill and overall feelgood vibes evaporate into badwill and recrimination so quickly. Everyone involved should hang their heads in shame so that they can look down and see that little bit clearer how much money has pooled all around their ankles. Oh damn this is dirty. I’m very sorry to say, but Oasis feels just a little bit more sullied now. The event everyone was so jubilant and excited about yesterday has become a bitter, disillusioning experience. Literally over night, something so good, so joyous, so celebrated, has become something dirty, disdained and, yes, disowned. Well done everybody.

RIght. If I’m not going to tell this now I probably never am. What a perfect opportunity to talk about the time when I was working in a bar and I looked after Liam Gallagher and his table of, I’m remembering, around 10 people. They were on our biggest table on a Sunday so there must have been a lot of them. I think enough time has passed now to talk about this encounter. Damn that was a busy day. One of the busiest and most stressful I’ve ever worked through in a bar. Sunday Fathers Day, 2019. We had an inkling it would be a big one. So much so that the day before the assistant manager Duran, who I had a great relationship with, asked if I’d be OK to be called to come in early if it all really kicked off. I said yes I would, and said if I saw I had a call from the bar I would assume it was because everything was on fire and so wouldn’t even answer as that would waste time. Instead, I did what I said I would, which was to be ready to leave, just reject the call as soon as I saw it was coming in, and head straight to the bar, which was about a 10 minute walk from my house. I walked into absolute chaos and a massively grateful and relieved Duran who said she’d totally forgotten my suggested tactic of the night before and thought I’d just rejected the call and not thought to come in. That, and to see Liam Gallagher sitting at our biggest table. As soon as I entered, I sprang straight into action, throwing myself anywhere and everywhere to help get things under control. That was impossible. But at least I helped hold our heads above water. Oh, who am I kidding? The place was a mess. The one time it actually did fall apart like you feel it can sometimes, but somehow it just about manages to stay together. Today was the day it actually did fall apart. So much so that Duran even had to leave the whole thing to me being in charge as she felt she had to help out in the kitchen. In all my time in bars and restaurants, you’re talking fewer than five times that I ever saw any floor personnel have to do that. And only once did I ever see any kitchen staff come out and work the floor. That was when I managed to slice right through my hand while cutting a loaf of bread and so couldn’t possibly deliver plates of food to anyone. The blood pouring out of my hand was almost unstoppable.

Digressed.

The point being, in all this, Liam’s table had to wait possibly the longest I’ve ever seen a table have to wait for desserts. So long in fact that the next party for their table arrived for their booking and I had to be the one to go and ask/tell The Liam actual Gallagher could he and all his family and friends please leave this table and go and sit outside in the garden. Yep. I had to ask/tell Liam Gallagher to leave my pub. But in the best possible way and he was so so understanding and brilliant about it. And you know, through all this thing, when his table had so many things go wrong because it was just the worst day ever in there, and they would have had every right to feel aggrieved and to have voiced that quite strongly, I didn’t hear one complaint. Not to any of us, and neither did I even hear a word of complaint or disquiet pass between them. I’m sure words were said and eye rolls made, and all totally justifiably. But I didn’t see or hear a hint of irritation, blame or castigation. Then, out in the beer garden – I could almost have got on my knees in thanks to the weather that day – I heard him talking about how much he really liked the pub. And, once the people at the newly vacated table had settled, he went out of his way to go inside and talk to and spend a little time with them. And during all the chaos of the day, he also took interest in talking to me, asking where I was from and telling me two or three times that he really loved and appreciated the job I was doing. If anything, I was the rude one. Answering questions as briefly as I could and really trying to get away as quicky as I could. Everywhere I looked, it felt that day, something somewhere was on fire and I had to go and put it out. Sorry Liam. I just didn’t have the time. What I was quite happy about myself with was that, like every other famous person who ever came in – apart from Damian Lewis one time, but that really is another story – not once during that whole day did I ever let on that I even vaguely recognised him and I really like to think he clocked that and appreciated that. Because of course he knew that I knew who he was. He even knew that I knew that he knew that I knew that he knew that I knew who he was. You know? Basically, the guy and all his company was an absolute pleasure to deal with as customers. He played no large cards at all at all. I don’t think I ever even heard his voice above the general chatter of the bar. He just sat, chilled and enjoyed like everyone else in there that day. And, apart from a massively star struck colleague who just had to get a photo with him before he left, I don’t think I saw one person approach him or bother him.

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