Category: The Tour Diaries Prologue

Prologue, day one

Wednesday November 3

Mark:

Living in your own studio in the Irish countryside with no neighbours with your girlfriend who also just happens to be half your act really isn’t a bad way to go about things. And mornings like this really are what it’s all about. We have a nice, lazy start to the day, waking up slow. But once we’re up, we’re all go and it’s on. We hit the studio. Hard.

We’ve had the set pretty much there since last weekend. Now it’s all about running the thing and polishing and sculpting which has been our priority one everyday.

To do that, we also have the warm up thing which often includes a cup of tea and a trip out to our back garden which contains a ruined 18th century factory. And a river. It’s a perfect setting and it truly fits our location as the only house on the most central crossroads in the country. This makes us geographically the most central people in the country.

So out we go to prepare, Maja loudly running her vocal scales to a tutorial video while I join in beside her but not quite so loud. I kinda keep it more talky level. While she’s the singer, my backing vocal duties mean I also have to keep up my end up. So here we are, wandering down to the river at the bottom of our garden on a crisp, semi blue skied mid morning. Flanked by the dramatic three and six storey half destroyed mill buildings and with a light rain gently swirling, the crows look down on us as, steaming mugs in hand, we run through the exercises free of any inhibition. Although the main street of our small town is right across that river, no-one can hear us.

Maja’s progress has been a thing of wonder and I consider this again as her voice soars and soars through the vocal exercises while she runs up the scales, each repetition higher than the one before. By sheer force of will she has crafted herself into a singer. She had a nice voice when we met in February, but nowhere near the power or control she wields now. And here we are. Six months after the Brexit instigated move to Ireland from London, we’ve developed our sound and our set and are ready to hit the stage. For Maja’s first ever gig.

In the past few days we’ve stopped facing each other in rehearsal and have now set ourselves up side by side, as we would be on a stage. So many young bands make the mistake of not doing that, always rehearsing in the round, and then they’re suddenly lost at their first gig as they can’t see or communicate with each other as easily as they’re used to. We also have all our equipment set up as though for a gig, speaker on, mixing desk to our left. My guitar mic’d up as it will be, although hopefully this will be the only gig where we do that; by the time we hit the stage after this first time, we’ll have an electro acoustic. And we’ll be in Berlin. The opening city for our European tour. The mad thing here is that we are following through on intentions we stated after we’d known each other less than four weeks. Back then, on March 17 and in the midst of despair at Brexit threatening to tear us apart, we decided we were going to defeat its consequences by writing songs and touring the world. And here we are, an English guy and a Swedish girl in the dead centre of Ireland with songs written and up to speed, and about to start on the next bit.

Although we know these songs very well by now and have recorded a few of them, there are still a surprising amount of details to get right and internalise, and in some cases even rewrite as we feel there are parts that just don’t quite work. Now it’s time to look at that micro picture. Really dive deep and spend time on the smallest of details. Then emerge and see the bigger picture again, the song complete. One two three go. Again and again, song after song. Got through that, now back to the start and play the whole set without pause, details complete. This includes how we approach my backing vocals and, with Maja’s voice having got stronger by the day, we look at changing a few keys. Each new key change adds that little extra whip and pop. I’d say that since we started recording a few weeks ago, Maja’s voice has undergone the biggest improvement it’s ever been through. It’s the most impressive and quickest growth I’ve ever seen in a musician and it has not happened by accident. This has been sheer will and dedication.

Maja:

Lately it’s been hard actually getting to the singing, and as things tend to do, they are starting to slip away from me. It’s on the agenda to do every day, but even living together with Mark it can be hard to get it started. But as soon as I’m up we’re on it. The rehearsals right now have started to take the shape of going through the setlist focusing on the places I think is the hardest to nail. So we get on it and start to iron out these little places. I’m having a bit of a hard time with some of the melodies, and am still at times singing certain pitches a little bit flat. We also take a look at the setlist. I’ve been finding the song When I’m With You a little bit hard to nail recently, and maybe I’m finding it a little bit uninspiring right now, so even though I know the song, at times when I sing it, it sounds a little bit – off maybe? So that song goes out of the setlist for now. It’s still a great song, we both love it, but it’s a risk right now.
A risk we’re not willing to take. 

When it comes to originals, people usually have very short attention spans. If you go to a pub on a Saturday night, people want to hear covers. They want to sing along, or just continue chatting without putting that much focus into it. With originals, people usually lose interest quite quickly. So we’ve prepared a shortened setlist of five songs, so we can keep their attention. Open up with: Smile Is Going Round, I Like You (Better When You’re Naked), Freefall, All That I Can Be and lastly All Kinds Of Wonderful. It’s a short set, maybe 20-25 minutes, that is almost guaranteed to keep the crowd’s attention. No really slow songs, everything is powerful, fast paced and poppy. Just fun. And then we’re leaving a couple of songs that we could get to if the feeling is right. We rehearse on and off until I say no, I can’t continue anymore. It’s around five and my voice is breaking. After dinner I go to rest, and spend a little too long lying in bed mindlessly watching silly videos. Mark soon comes next to me and soon I can hear him start to snore. As it approaches nine, I toss the covers off me. ‘Wake up, if we’re going to see the guys we need to go now.’

Mark:

The guys are Pat and Colm. We met them on Sunday at the end of our day trip to Tullamore, the biggest town in Offaly. We’d been round a bunch of pubs and were on our last one before catching the last train back to Clara, which left at 9:30. And it was here that Pat just happened to be performing, his friend Colm tagging along for moral support and to sing a song or two. We got talking to Pat before the show, introducing ourselves as musicians and he was very welcoming. So much so that when we rose from our seats half an hour later, and said bye, and that we had to leave for our last train, he said, ‘Stick around and have the craic. I’m going your way. I’ll give you a lift.’ Wonderful. So stick around we did, and got into the fun hanging out with Colm and having a good dance around the place and taking in the general feelgood vibes created by one man and his guitar.

On the way home, they told us they were playing a little informal show at The Trap, our local, and where we just happened to be playing on Friday. They’d love to see us there, they say. So, tonight, there is where we’re going to go.

Maja:

Mark is immediately up, properly putting on a shirt. I reluctantly brush my hair. I’m tired, I’m going to go there, but I won’t even bother changing clothes. I’m wearing my Gorillaz sweatshirt, the one that only the band got from Damon Albarn during their tour a couple of years ago, the Humanz tour. Under it just a worn down T-shirt. Well, I’m ready to go. We get there and just inside Pat and Colm and a couple of others are sitting there next to the entrance drinking pints of Guinness. We say hello, and go get ourselves a beer each then go sit down at the table next to them, in the corner of the pub. We’re a bit too far away to participate in the discussions but we’re still closeby and the football is on. Me and Mark start to talk details about the tour we’re planning. We’ve recently started to entertain the concept of really penetrating a couple of cities before continuing along. Like, actually be in Berlin for a month or so, to build a reputation, and then start over in another city, maybe Amsterdam or Prague. Do that on repeat until we hopefully penetrate something bigger and get ourselves on to a real, organised tour or something else that could be amazing to do.

Mark seems a little bit bored with me, and wants to chat with others as well since we’re out. But I really don’t feel that way. Not tonight. I just want to see the music show, watch the football and drink one or maybe two beers. Without talking to anyone. So I sit back and let Mark go and talk with someone. It’s nice not having to be social all the time. I’m great at being social, but I kind of need to be in the mood for it. I just want to be with Mark and watch what’s going on. Colm asks why Mark hasn’t brought his guitar, but it’s not really what I want to spend my night doing. Sitting alone just watching Mark play. That feels a bit… unfriendly even. 

Mark:

I actually thought it would be a bit presumptuous to just bring an instrument. Especially if I had chosen to bring anything it would have been my bass and amp which would have had everyone wondering what the hell I planned to do with that at a table performance. Of course my volume would have been totally appropriate and fine, but I think just walking in with a 300 watt amp would have sent the wrong message. Once I’ve had the invitation, I do consider going home to get it and even say I could do so but I sense a very subtle reaction from Maja and ask, away from the guys, how she feels. Totally reasonably, she says, ‘I don’t want to be sitting here on my own while you go off and play with people. That’s not really my idea of a good night out.’ Yeah. Fair enough.

Maja:

So Mark decides to stay with me instead. As the football ends the musicians go to the stage area and sit around the table bringing out their instruments. Today’s musicians consist of Pat and his friends: his uncle Colm on guitar, Michael on Cajon and guitar, and Aine on violin. Pat calls us over and invites us to sit at the table but we feel that would be a bit of an intrusion. We’re fine where we are for now.

They start to sing and we sit close by listening. After a while Mark goes to chat with some people and I enjoy my one beer and entertainment. Completely convinced I’m going to keep a low profile, not talking to anyone. 

Mark:

I’m not bored with Maja. Not at all. But yeah, we’re out and we’re playing in this place in a few days’ time. I want to be sociable. But of course, we can hang out as just the two of us as well. It’s just that we’re also new to this town and there are a few people dotted about here tonight that we’ve got to know a little and who have been very welcoming. I’d like to go and say hi at the very least, and so I do.

Maja:

After a while Mark comes up to me to say that someone wants us to play. What?

No. No way! No, no, no, no, no. That’s not happening. I’m overly clear telling Mark this, then I escape to the ladies room. Upon my return, Mark grabs my shoulders, looks me in the eyes, very seriously, telling me: We should really play something. They’re asking us to.’ ‘No way Mark. We’re playing on Friday. I don’t want to wreck my voice.‘ Once again I try to get back to my seat. I feel a bit, well, not ready to perform. Mark is on me once again, ‘Please, we kind of need to.’ ‘Fine, but ONLY if I get to do Breakthrough. Because my voice isn’t holding up for any of the big songs.’ Mark seems relieved. 

Mark:

It’s the landlord Jimmy who first asks us to play. When I mention it to Maja she firmly says she doesn’t want to. Her voice is weak from everything we’ve done today and she doesn’t want to blow it for Friday. Fair enough. And anyway, I’m not going to begin to try to persuade Maja to do something she doesn’t want to do. I go and tell Jimmy we’re not playing and he’s like, ‘Why not?’ He doesn’t say it, but I can see it written all over face. We’re playing in here Friday. There’s an audience here and musicians with instruments that we can use to help advertise ourselves, both for ourselves and, as far as Jimmy’s concerned, for his bar. I totally get it. I return to Maja and yes, I’m a bit more forceful this time, saying that we’re here Friday, the bar has been kind enough to give us the gig, the least we can do is play at least one song here to help promote it. She gets it too.

Maja:

It is kind of a sit around the table with the musicians there, who seem to be playing mainly for themselves. I feel ridiculously out of place, like I don’t belong there. I combat my feelings and go up to the table where they welcome me. Mark gets to borrow Colm’s guitar, and we both sit down at the table. One, two, three and we’re off. It’s a very low song and I can’t sing it strongly. It’s gentle, which is why I chose it, and it is not directly going to be heard outside of the table. The vocal melody is delicate, intricate, and just can’t be sung in a powerful voice. It needs to be amplified. I can barely hear myself, trying to sing it as strongly as I can without any amplification. After a little while, I can hear the other musicians join in. Some gentle cajon. And some of the most beautiful violin playing I’ve ever heard. It sounds so beautiful, with the little orchestra backing my very delicate voice. The song is enormous, but so delicate that you can’t hear it if you don’t sharpen your ears. As the last note seems to be endlessly dragged across the universe, slowly fading out in the ether, applause fills up the newly made sound space. People shout at us to sing something more powerful and the musicians around us look astonished. Aine told me that she loved the quality of my voice and would love to hear it amplified. I am absolutely delighted. Delighted beyond. Pat seems to have been completely taken by surprise. He tells Mark that he absolutely loves the song and that the chords in the melody are absolutely beautiful. Both me and Mark shine with pride as we say thank you. But the consensus right now seems to be that we have to sing one more song. Oh. What to do? We need something a bit more powerful now. ‘Let’s go with freefall.’ 

Mark directs me this time to direct the bar instead of the musicians and I stand up. No way I can sing Freefall without standing up. As we start I realise how the whole bar is into it. Freefall isn’t a quick song, but it is powerful. It has some really heavy parts in it where I can actually use some volume and punk vibes, but it has a lot of gentleness in it as well if you choose to perform it that way. I think we’re joined by the other musicians in this song, but I am too busy performing to really notice. I am absolutely in the moment. I am living the song, using my whole body to express it. It’s like the whole world disappears as I sing. I get jolted back to reality by the occasional forgotten lyric, but more often than not my brain just keeps imagining some sound to put in the place instead. Avoiding breaking the spell. It’s like I can hear the room get shocked and sucked into the song, when the dynamics of the song changes. Once again the song dies out as I slowly fade out on the last note. The audience is delighted and I hear nothing but applause and praise everywhere I look.

We order ourselves a second beer, sitting down with the musicians, chatting a little bit in between the songs. There’s not that many breaks in it, but they seem to have newfound respect for both of us which is great. After a little while Mark calls me, telling me about this girl that seems to want to talk to me. I leave the musicians table, walk up and lean towards a bar chair. This girl Sevilla comes up to me, totally praising me and being very vocal about it. ‘I love what you did, you sing great. But I want to hear you sing more. I want you to sing more powerfully.’ Sevilla says. I try to defend myself, ‘Well, you see, I’ve sung so much today that I’m about to lose my voice. I can’t sing anymore’. She is having none of my defenses. ‘I really want to hear you belt it out. Do it for us, we want to hear’. Well OK, then. I don’t really think I have a choice in the matter. ‘OK, I’ll sing one more, a powerful one, just for you Sevilla.’ I go find Mark and tell him. ‘We’re going to do Naked.’ He looks surprised but delighted. ‘Tell them, we’re doing one more’, and Mark goes up to the musicians table to see about us doing one more. But just as he is walking up there, there’s this guy that asks them to do a song and he starts singing a traditional Irish trad song. We wait our turn, and I make sure to tell the bar manager that we’ll be doing one more so he won’t miss it. 

Mark:

I would never normally do this. Be invited to play a song with people, do my thing, then go and ask if I could do more. But this is not a normal situation. It’s punters who are doing the demanding and I make this clear to Pat, saying, ‘I’m sorry mate. I don’t really care, but we aren’t being given a choice here. People are demanding we do more. Could we please come back in?’ He laughs and offers me his guitar. Oh, double bonus. Unlike the guitar I used earlier, this one has a strap on it, meaning I’m able to play standing up which is how we usually do it.

Maja:

After we sit down at our seats at the musicians table I can actually see the people at the bar communicating in a way that seems like they’re anticipating our next song. Jerry calls people to him, and I can see the rumor spreading. As the Irishman finishes his eight minutes long song, Mark gets to borrow Pat’s guitar, and I take my place up on a chair, effectively creating a stage for myself. Mark stands close to me, and I turn towards the bar. 

‘Hello everyone, we are The Diaries. This is our pre warmup gig for the warmup gig we have here on Friday. We have one more song to perform to you tonight. This one is dedicated to you, Sevilla. ‘I Like You (Better When You’re Naked)’’. The crowd cheers, and we start. Hard. I sing loud, standing on the chair. Moving with my whole body. Looking at the audience. There’s no doubt only complete confidence. I own this place. You will look at me. You will love hearing this. I absolutely belt out the song. Powerfully. There’s no amplification, but everyone hears every single word I sing. You can feel how they are sucked into the moment, completely taken back by the performance. Everyone looks at me, and I am loving it. As the song cheekily ends with ‘I like you better when you’re naked’, me and Mark go quiet and the room absolutely explodes into applause. ‘Thank you so much’, I call out to the audience feeling like a rockstar. As I step off the chair I tell the audience, ‘Here you have it. That’s for all of you that are calling me shy’. I see how the people around me are shocked. They don’t expect me to say something that extreme, but it feels so nice. I got so tired of them thinking I couldn’t sing with power just because the first songs were slow. It’s a little bit of an in your face moment, which I completely deserve. 

This is awesome. People are loving it. I can see how they’re shocked and everyone’s attitudes have changed. From being all like: ‘What you’re doing is impossible’, to treating me with respect. It’s amazing. The greatest change in attitude I see from the musicians. They don’t seem to know what they just saw. It’s like they can’t process it. 

So. If we weren’t in the musicians group already, we certainly are now. Both of us.

I am a rockstar tonight.

Mark:

This does not happen. Original songs played during cover sets mostly get ignored, just less actually cheered. But even when they do, a reaction like this? No. That really doesn’t happen. To be asked for more? Does not happen at all. To have a third demanded? Actually demanded? Does. Not. Happen. This has been an incredible first experience of our own songs fully out there in public. A great confidence boost for myself and for Maja as she prepares to front a project for the first time in her life. And a confidence boost for our music and performances in general. I think you could say we feel ready for Friday now. 

We’ve heard quite a few pieces of advice recently about what we’re about to do. A guy we met a few weeks ago almost begged us not to try to play our own songs in this town. ‘They’ll throw things at you,’ he said.

Pat and Colm, who we met last week. Full of well meaning and heartfelt advice. Colm almost pleading with us not to do what we were planning to do. ‘I really really advise you to throw some covers in when you play there,’ he said in the car as Pat was giving us a lift home. I was emphatic. ‘No. It will be all originals.’ I think inside his mind he threw his hands in the air and gave up. ‘They’ll learn,’ he may well have been thinking.

Pat had his say in the same conversation. ‘Originals? No-one wants to know. All they want is nursery rhymes for adults. That’s what playing covers is and that’s what they want.’ Here, I threw my own two bob into it, even as I was defiantly resisting, just to let them know that I knew exactly where they were coming from. ‘John Lennon himself could come back from the dead, write a song for you and you could go play it in a bar and no-one would care.’ Pat and Colm nod knowingly. Yes. It’s exactly like that. Their demeanour screams, ‘You see. You get it. So don’t do it.’

After what’s just happened here tonight, no-one’s telling us to do covers anymore. This performance is also the catalyst for me and Maja to look at each other and say, ‘Screw it. Let’s do our full set as planned.’

Thursday November 4

Maja:

Yesterday was amazing. But I really went overboard with my voice so I have to rest it as much as possible today, so today I’m as silent as I can possibly be. We even do a silent rehearsal where Mark plays the guitar and we just sing the song in our heads. I am trying to memorise all of the lyrics. I know them somewhat by now, but I am a bit afraid of forgetting them.

Mark:

After this we go through the song ideas we’ve accumulated in our Cubase recording notes section. This takes almost two hours and we uncover and rediscover quite a few things we really quite like, including a song tentatively called Hanging In The Place, and another that could be called Shine, or something.

We talk through a few ideas over dinner, and then generally hang out, and then, as the clock ticks past midnight, Hanging In The Place suddenly starts to take shape as we each add lyrical ideas until we have a pretty cool A Capella song which we’re both singing. I make the crazy suggestion of performing this tomorrow and Maja does the crazy thing of agreeing. So that’s it. In the set it goes.

It’s the most scarcely worded song I’ve ever been involved in writing. Apart from the chorus, it has just 22 words and one of them is sung eight times. I ‘write’ the first verse with just the word Hello. ‘Oh, says Maja. A one letter verse. Cool.’ It is of course a slip, but I take up the challenge and proceed to rise to it, ‘writing’ a third verse of just I. With a little cheating ‘I’m’ to finish. One of the things songwriters often talk of is the challenge of writing a one chord song. I don’t think the one word verse gets nearly enough attention.

Now we have a chat about exactly what we’re going to do when we hit the stage. How much talk, and when? Everything’s up for grabs, but we do make one solid decision which is that we will not talk before the first song. No introductory preamble. People just want you to get on with it. We also decide we won’t talk after it. Just straight into the next one. 

Maja:

Mark wants to go to an event about the history of town today, but I won’t go. 

Mark:

It’s not just a talk about the history of the town. It’s a story of the history of the town from the Goodbody perspective. Ahhh. You see now. No? OK. We live in the house that used to be lived in by the manager of the mill. Or something like that. And our whole back garden is the mill works. The two big ruined buildings, the courtyard where trucks used to come out, complete with those big industrial garden gate doors. And the river at the end of it all. It was all constructed and run by the Goodbody family. We live in it, so tonight’s talk is literally about what’s in our back garden. Yes. I really want to go. But…

Maja:

My voice is too weak and I want to be at home. If we’re out tonight, someone might want us to perform, and I am not ready for that. I need to save myself for tomorrow. Mark reluctantly agrees that this is the best plan and we have a nice night staying in together. 

And as we do, enjoying some celebratory whiskey at two o’clock in the morning, magic strikes us. A new song is born. We call it Bang Bang, and it goes in the set tomorrow.  

Mark:

To be fair, Maja’s all up for me going out on my own. I wouldn’t massively be against that myself, but tonight it just doesn’t quite fit. So yeah. We stay in. And bang bang happens. It’s the name of the song!!

Friday November 5

Mark:

My first ever rehearsal in bed. And the firstest band related thing I’ve ever done in my life. It happens as soon as I open my eyes so this record will not be broken. Unless someone uses my hands to play percussion while I’m asleep. Come to think of it, maybe they have. Maja’s already awake and as soon as she sees my eyes open she gently starts to sing our new song, which she will follow up by announcing it is now titled Bang Bang. And of course I join in. This song is an A capella with both of us singing.

And this is how we begin the day of our first gig. With our first and only rehearsal of the day and we’ve not even got up yet.

Maja:

I love that. I am getting so many of your firsts!

Mark:

Yes you most definitely are. And given I’ve never been on an actual international musical tour, I feel you’ll be getting a whole lot more of them. Oh, and people, this is actually me and Maja talking to each other in here right now. She’s in Sweden and I’m home alone in London. And Maja wrote this tonight and we’re putting it out tonight, so this is pretty much real time communication.

Maja:

You’ve been around for so much longer than I have, but I still manage to snatch all these little gems that I call our firsts. And yes, challenge accepted. I will soon play percussion with you when you’re asleep. I’m deciding that no-one has done that yet, so I’m going to! It’s mine!

Mark:

Oh no. I think I’ve made a terrible mistake.

As we get into the day, Maja is supremely confident. So much so that I actually find it a little unsettling, nervous that she might have gone a little into the complacent column. I mention none of this because I don’t want to make her nervous, and this confidence is wonderful to see. The first she heard of it was when she read that last sentence you just read. So you are literally on the same page.

Maja:

I can’t not react to that, can I? No. Seriously? Did you really find my behaviour unsettling? 

Mark:

Yes.

Maja:

Wow. That’s news to me. But yeah, I feel absolutely no nervousness towards performing. I can’t even tell you why, I just feel extremely confident. I’m not complacent, I just don’t feel nervous. I feel like I could perform in a stadium without being afraid. 

Mark: 

Working ourselves into the day, we have a look at my to do list for while Maja is away.

I have just the best to do list ever. It looks like this. 

song writing – which Maja absolutely insists goes top of priorities. 

Diary writing

Record guitar tracks for everything we have so that Maja can practice over the next three weeks.

Pitching for:

A support tour with an established act

Agents for The Diaries book(s)

Publishers for the same

Then pitching for this new idea.

The Tour Diary

This is something we believe could be a proposition for publications of various types, both on and offline, and something we think such businesses would pay for. We also think that if we stick to entities which are not in competition with each other, we can write essentially the same piece each week, or whatever is required, and get paid for it from each publication. It’s an idea.

Maja:

I’m quite happy with the list that’s finally starting to take shape. Mark really has enough to do to take the time of a full time job. Nah, he has way much more to do. As for me, I really wish I could be more active in this thing right now, but I am going to Sweden to have surgery. I have a ganglion on my wrist, which is pressing on a nerve and hurts so I’m getting it cut out, and during that time I am going to hang out at my mum’s house. So it’s going to be hard for me to focus on the project, but I’ll do my best during the time I get. I won’t really be able to write that much, since I will be effectively one armed for the majority of the visit. For me, it’s going to be surgery and family and dog time. Quite nice. So I’m going to focus on that, and Mark will be doing a lot from his side. The next time we will meet each other will probably be on our European Tour. Starting, maybe in Berlin? Let’s see what happens.

Somewhere in the afternoon I start to pack. I’m effectively packing for an European tour which I don’t know when I’m getting back from. I mainly have to make sure that all clothing is clothing I feel confident in, and only things that I would like to wear performing or in photographs and videos. And also, a couple of pajamas to sleep in. Clothing, make-up, and who’s a serious musician if you’re not having a significant part of your bag filled with music equipment? Microphones, leads, interface and small bits and pieces. Yeah, I think I’m somewhat set. I’m ready. We’re going on tour, and no, I haven’t played my first gig yet. That’s next now.

Mark:

We’ve spent the past few days mildly avoiding the elephant in the room that Maja’s leaving Ireland the day after the show and we won’t see each other for at least three weeks. But we haven’t been able to help escape the quite mad narrative fact that we will be playing our first gig on Maja’s last full day in Ireland before the tour.

With that, she now starts packing. A little while later I say, ‘I’ve just realised. You’re packing for the European tour.’ ‘Yes, I know,’ she replies. ‘I’ve been very well aware of that. It’s crazy.’ And she has still never played a gig in her life.

That of course is about to change. By the time 8 O’Clock comes round we’ve got our gear together and are ready to leave. The Trap is about five minutes’ walk away from us so we’re in with plenty of time to set up and soundcheck.

While we’re setting up, quite a few curious looks are coming our way. I see this as an excuse to introduce ourselves by going up to people, explaining what’s happening and giving them a card. The first person I walk up to reacts to my pleasantries with, ‘Will you just get on with it and play some music?’ Oh dear. Without losing my friend face, I explain to him that yes, while we still are setting up, we’re not due to start until 9pm anyway. It is now 8:20. I choose not to tell Maja of this mildly hostile exchange. Whenever you’re soundchecking or setting up, it’s not at all unheard of for a drunk person or two to say words along the lines of, ‘Get on with it.’ It really doesn’t make you particularly motivated to entertain them to be fair.

Maja hasn’t flinched. Hasn’t shown the slightest sign of blinking. Carry on. Get through the song and carry on. She was right. She really wasn’t nervous. She truly was ready. She’s come in here tonight like she owns the place and really, if you’re going to do your own songs to any kind of audience really, that’s the attitude you need to have. I’m in charge here and that’s the end of it. She is, and it’s all eyes on Maja.

Maja:

The second song feels easier. I’m totally in it. I have the lyrics on a music stand out of sight of the audience in case I lose my place in the song, but I realise that it’s really hard to change pages. I just take the previous song and toss it on the floor. Good enough. We barely allow any time between the two first songs, and to me A Listing disappears almost as quickly as we started it. As the song ends I realise the number of phones that have appeared. The cheer is deafening. I can’t really think straight, but I am good at working under pressure. Mark says ‘Thank you, thank you so much’, and I realise that I need to speak.

Mark:

When we finish: Mad. Just loud, high pitched. An original band in coverband territory. This isn’t supposed to happen. They’re with us all the way now and Maja is feeling it. It’s on. She’s ready to talk and gives the shortest of speeches to mention that this is our last gig before touring, and to introduce the next song, pausing before the bracket. I Like You (Better When You’re Naked), a song we started writing sitting at our kitchen table one night after Maja just came out with those exact words.

Maja:

‘Thank you so much everyone. We are The Diaries. This is our warm up gig for our European tour. Next stop, Berlin.’ Then, slightly out of breath: ‘This next song, we call: I Like You Better When You’re Naked.’ I wish I could show you the stunned looks on the audience’s faces. It’s priceless. I’m taking a sip of water, and use that short moment to really observe the audience. I couldn’t tell you how many people were here when we started, but it is definitely more now. I think the young guys from the back bar are starting to emerge as well. The phones are out. I’m loving it. And this song is really fun to perform. I won’t say fun to sing anymore, it’s fun to perform. A performance to me is so much more. I have the room wrapped around my little finger. 

Mark:

Oh man it’s on. After the adrenaline packed near disaster of Smile, which could have seen us finished before we really started, and the full throated support of A Listing, we feel we have this now. Maja’s body language throughout has shown that she never had a doubt and I think I can claim the same. We have not backed down. Not an inch. Not for a second. And now here we are. Naked just hits. It just hits. By now, the room is full of people pointing their phones at us, recording us. This level of reaction? An originals act in coverband territory? Come on. This does not happen. An original band in original band territory playing their first gig? Even there, this level of reaction does not happen. We thought the first two songs had caused eruptions. They were just warm ups for what follows Naked. Then we drop the ball.

Maja:

I had the room wrapped around my finger. I owned the room. Now it feels like no-one is listening anymore. I mean yeah, it is disappointing to see the audience right now, but I don’t really care. I can’t stop half way through a song, and if anyone is enjoying it, even one, I need to do my absolute best. Well maybe no-one is listening. It feels that way as the audience starts to creep back to their corners and beers. Even if the ball is dropped, even if they are going to boo afterwards, I need to finish this song. Finish it so we can lead into the next one. I close my eyes to try to feel the delicateness of the song a bit more. This song is all about feel. We performed this to a friend once, after showing some of our more upbeat material. You know what he did? He took a piss. He turned his back to us as I was singing and took a piss. Well, seeing that we just left. He is no friend of ours anymore. That’s a line crossed. Or more of a wall broken down with a bulldozer of disrespect. So I know that this song can be a hit or miss, and it is definitely missing today even though it hit two days ago. But dare I say we’re having a little bit of a success anyway. There’s this guy in the back with his hands in the air waving along to the music. As soon as I finish it, I let those last notes slowly die out and there’s applause. People are still cheering at us. ‘Thank you very much. Next song is called Freefall’.

Freefall feels so good to sing. It just does. There’s this delicateness in the beginning that completely matches the slowness of Breakthrough, but it is fierce. The language and melody are just strong. In the beginning it’s delicate but then it just cuts through. ‘These words are cutting far too deep, keep crawling at me in my sleep.’ Just yes. And that crawling is my little rewrite. This song just hits me so hard every time I sing it and I love performing it, which makes it a good choice to have after a possible miss. Because I won’t falter one step. I can totally just sing this song for myself, and that is going to make the audience adore me. I wanna be adored. And just by doing this, I am slowly picking the ball back up again. People are coming back out, and I have the attention once again. 

‘Thank you very much. I always wondered, what can you really be?’ I’m making this up on the spot. ‘What would you be? What if you were a door? Or a song?’ Mark fills in, telling me, ‘I think you’re a song tonight.’ ‘Yeah, I think I’m a song as well. That’s fitting for tonight. This next song is about that. It’s called All That I Can Be.’

Mark:

It’s only afterwards that we think maybe we shouldn’t have done this, but no-one ever made a mistake in hindsight. If we had chosen not to play Breakthrough we might have kicked ourselves for bottling it. But maybe to play a slowie after such a big hit of a fastie, maybe not the best of ideas. But then, maybe we didn’t think Naked would land in such a big way. But here we are. Breakthrough is a kind of a break and I get the feeling a few people are into it and having a nice groove. The bar all starts to get a bit chatty again. OK. That’s fine. I guess they’re happy to have a chance to get back to a little talk for a while. Then Freefall after that. I like the way this song starts slow and builds, fitting domino like into Breakthrough. But it’s another slow section people have to wait through and I can’t help thinking we’re slightly losing them after doing so well to have got them. Freefall is a really weird song for me. It’s a very old one and a song I’ve always put way down my own list. But it’s almost like the runt that finds its own power to beat the whole litter. It’s just kept being there. Way back when, being asked to do a radio slot, my band said Freefall was the one. Putting together a set for the next lineup of that band. Freefall was everyone’s choice. It wasn’t mine. Maja had my whole lifetime of songs to listen to. Freefall made it into the final selection. Then when we came to record, we went for Naked first. Maja’s next call? Yep. You guessed it. It just keeps being there. Whatever this thing is, it’s grown a will and a power well beyond my control. If I’d had my way it would never have been heard again past the first year of its existence. But here it is, almost two decades later still being picked above everything. You can’t do anything but stand aside when that starts happening to your own songs. 

So now it’s here now. It doesn’t get the best of reactions to be fair, but by the end we can see they’re still with us. Onto All That I Can Be and Wide Blue Yonder, a song we have a lot of faith in. Neither really fully hits anywhere near the first three, but Maja hasn’t been put off her stride one bit tonight. She’s a powerhouse tonight, her body language almost raging at the audience even as the songs drip feelgood factor. She’s selling them like they cannot be refused. And they are not being refused. The whoops and cheers of the first three songs haven’t quite happened again and I really think we’ve made a mistake with the order. But then, to not play Breakthrough would have felt like bottling it. We’ll take these lessons. Bottom line is, seven songs in and they’re still onside. I would have taken just that before we started tonight.

Maja:

Neither All That I Can Be nor Wide Blue Yonder got a huge reaction, but they are good songs and they got polite reactions. Which is fine. It feels like the audience is starting to lose focus, and they are getting used to the set we’re having. So it is time for us to stir it up with the biggest risk of tonight. Bang Bang. Written 18 hours ago, and no, I can’t quite recall the melody. Mark puts down his guitar and we start off with the first chorus together, the song starts directly with a chorus. As the chorus is about to end I turn my microphone off, put it down and start to walk around the pub singing the first verse. ‘Hello, hello, hello.’ I watch the people, kinda saying hello to them, letting the people close to me hear my voice as Mark is the only one amplified. I’m just dancing around singing, and so many people are filming me. The next chorus starts and I stay on the floor, preparing for the cool part that comes in verse two. I’m putting my hands into the pistol sign dancing bang bang, but the sound doesn’t come. Mark has completely forgotten how it goes, and he can’t hear me. Oh well, it must look really funny I think as I continue my silly soundless dance, singing bang bang myself. He soon improvises something and I continue to dance and sing ‘Walking through the tables a little unstable bang bang.’ Yeah. That’s it. The melody is slightly wrong, but it is OK. As I join him back for the last verse and chorus it feels like we did it. Now it is just the last song. There’s a loud cheer and we start our song All Kinds Of Wonderful.

Mark:

If we thought we were taking a risk on Bang Bang before we come here, it gets even riskier during Wide Blue Yonder. All I could think of was what was coming next and I just couldn’t remember the rhythm. So I lost focus and made a few mistakes in Wide as well, which we got away with, but they were there. Now we start Bang Bang and I still haven’t quite got it fully in my bones yet. It gets no introduction. Wide finishes and I click my fingers to a beat. We’re doing this A Capella and Maja is going to go out there among the audience, alone. While I stay on the stage, guitarless and alone. And with the second verse just totally gone from my mind.

But there she is. Out there, completely giving it. We really had no idea how this would go, but it’s going and Maja is owning the bar and her new public while I do my own gentle thing back here. We get to the second verse and I still don’t have it. So I just do. Something. Just keep it going. I think it’s horrendous and I will spend the next day still beating myself up about it. Like a goalkeeper who played great in a 4-1 victory but who can’t let go of the one goal that was totally his fault. But, fast forward and I see a recording of it. It really isn’t so bad at all. It even works. We got away with that one. Goal chalked off by VAR review. 4-0.

Even in the moment I feel we’ve got away with something. We were so uncertain about this one that we’d gone for just launching straight into the next song without a break, which is me pounding a down picking beat before Maja comes in when she’s ready. This results in the very strange but satisfying situation of being deep into the intro of a song while the audience is still full on cheering for the last one. Well, I guess that went OK then.

We’re now into our last song. All Kinds Of Wonderful. Another new one from Clara that me and Maja have punched and beaten into shape. One single line had us beat for two days until Maja bounded into the bathroom while I was having a shower to declare that she’d nailed it. She had.

Maja:

Performing All Kinds of Wonderful it’s like I just can’t connect with it. It feels flat, it feels just, boring almost. The attention we’re getting is devastatingly small. It just misses. That’s such a disappointment. The big one we’d saved for last. It feels like it deserves more attention, but yeah I get it. The performance is probably not doing the song any favours. I think it is a bit too poppy maybe. Maybe we can make it feel better in the future, maybe it can be just that the key is wrong, I don’t know. It needs to feel bigger. But I can’t do anything about it right now, but trying my best with what we got. So we do. As we finish, there’s almost no applause. 

‘Thank you very much guys, that was our last song. We are The Diaries.’ I finish off and take a sip of water. People are turning around confused.

Mark:

The reaction to us finishing this is a bit underwhelming. A little disappointing. We chose this as the show closer because we had so much faith in it and now everything feels a little flat. Oh well. We’ve made it this far and that really means a lot. I start to put the guitar down. Then, as I’m putting the guitar down, it begins.

More. More. More. But not just that. It feels like the whole bar is calling for Naked. An original act playing a coverband bar. Getting a rapturous encore, and a unanimous call for one song. Come on. This does not happen.

Maja:

They just started. Almost like a chant. More, more, more. People are shouting, and they want to hear the song Naked. Wow. This feels amazing. ‘Thank you so much everyone, we’ll do one more. This is I Like You Better When You’re Naked!’ And off we go. I’m sweating, my voice is beginning to break but I’m on the home run now. This is the last stretch and I am enjoying it to its fullest. I go all in, with power and all the cheekiness I can muster. I wish the audience was bigger. I am absolutely loving it.

After the cheeky ending where we both shout: ‘I like you better when you’re NAKED,’ the pub just explodes in applause and cheering and whooping. I feel like a rockstar. I am a rockstar. Again there are shouts for more. Demands. But we have to decline. I give Mark a victory kiss and we start to turn the equipment off and then we’re dragged around the different groups of the audience as people praise us. Well, of course there’s that drunk asshole that keeps asking me to get naked just because of that song, but apart from that there’s just a lot of praise. People tell us that we’re going to be huge. We sign autographs, and there’s requests to take selfies with us. After the first round of attention has settled down we order a beer. ‘Well done tonight Mark. We owned this place tonight.’

Well I’ve never done a gig before, but I don’t think this happens to everyone. Maybe it does, what do I know?

Mark:

Oh wow. OK. After all that, after all the uncertainty, with the, we have them, we don’t, we do, we don’t, we’re getting an encore. But not just that. There’s one particular song the whole place wants again. So we do it. And just like that we have them again. Totally. The place goes mad and some are even singing along to the chorus. We finish and again, there are calls for more and more. I look up at Maja. We really don’t have more. At least, not anything that can top that. And anyway, ‘Leave ‘em shouting for more,’ I say. Yep. We agree. We’re done. 

We make our way straight out into the bar. Past well wishing audience members and in among the few people we’ve got to know in here. But I get called away, and Maja does too. People just want to talk to us now.

The guys who call me over are emphatic. They want autographs. And more. They want us to sign stuff to put up over the back of the bar to show we were here. One of the guys even asks for some kind of memorabilia to display in the bar. I have no idea what that would be. I have no idea if the management would want anything and I’m not going to offer. That would just be a bit too forward. They introduce themselves to me as Albert, Steve and Joe. And they nod as Albert says, ‘You guys are going to be huge, and I want people to know you started in Clara.’ What the hell are you supposed to say to that? I just write the messages and sign the autographs. Then I take the beermats I was given over to a totally disbelieving Maja who signs the first autographs of her life. At the end of the first gig of her life. Singing originals.

Maja? What can I say? First ever gig and you’ve got two encore calls and you’re signing autographs. This. Does. Not. Happen. You are a rockstar. And I love you.

Maja:

This was amazing. I am a rockstar now. And so are you. 

I think I stole some more of you firsts tonight.

Saturday November 6

Maja:

We got home late last night, and maybe went to bed at around 2 AM, so my body feels destroyed as I open up my eyes at 6 in the morning. Off to a shower and then to the airport with the first train. Time is scarce, so Mark is escorting me to the airport in case I miss my flight. We make some chicken to eat on the train, and as we’re messing around with the packing Mark asks me, ‘We left stuff at the venue last night, right?’ ‘No we didn’t.’ Our PA and the trolley it was on are nowhere to be seen. Oh no. I am already dressed so I go outside to see if it is around here. As I trace our steps back to the bar, I find it. It’s neatly put towards our garden entry so it is as protected from rain as it could be. Thank you so much, whoever put it here. And what a relief as I drag it back home. 

We’re really short on time. We make the first train, where we get to have some tired celebratory chat until we fall asleep leaning against each other. It’s really cosy, and I am going to miss Mark so much it’s untrue. I wish I didn’t have to go, but reality is reality and I need to go. As we reach the airport we need to run to the check-in counter, where I just about made it before they closed. Before I leave him at the security check we look at each other and say, ‘Goodbye rockstar. See you in Berlin.’

Mark:

Yes. Goodbye rockstar. See you in Berlin.

Some of the coolest words I’ve ever said or heard.

Once I’ve made sure Maja is through and in line to board the plane – possibly the quickest I’ve ever seen anyone do that from terminal entry to line by the way – I get the bus back to the station. I have no intention of hanging around Dublin. I’m just going to get back home. Arriving at the station, I see the next train isn’t for another hour and a half. Oh bum. Oh, but there’s a big Premierleague soccer game on today that starts in an hour or so. New plan. I walk back into town and find a place to watch that.

On the way, walking along the River Liffey, I have a chat with Rick who’s curious about how last night went. When I tell him, his reaction is, ‘That is phenomenal.’ I see people playing original songs in bars all the time. No-one cares. It’s ridiculous that you got that reaction.’

Getting back home and me and Maja talk on the phone. We agree that we have a whole new confidence now about what we can do in Berlin and beyond. And a whole new confidence of being able to pitch to tours and agents. You can believe in your songs or your product all you want, but until you take it out to market or put it in front of people, you just don’t know. We went into a very tough arena last night and the thing just hit. You really do have to take something out of that. And we’re taking it all the way to Berlin.

Day five

Sunday November 7

Mark:

I want to go and see Pat in Tullamore again. First, just because I want to go and it would be nice to keep up with a new friendly face. But cynical me really does want to take news of what happened on Friday, bearing in mind the insistence we got last week that we were going to get nowhere round here playing originals and no covers. Granted, we still haven’t actually got anywhere. But neither is two encores and autograph requests nowhere. I really really want Pat to know this, and hopefully from there, maybe some word of this to other musicians he knows because he’s someone who seems to know them all.

My first surprise of the night is that the bar staff remember me and Maja from last week and are wonderfully friendly. Wow. That is impressive from them. About ten minutes after I’ve arrived and settled down, Pat shows up. We have an enthusiastic hello and the first thing he asks is how Maja’s getting on. Thanks for that. The second is yes, he asks how the show went last week. He’s delighted when I tell him, but I also think a little surprised. I can’t deny that I do enjoy telling him after last weeks’ insistences but to be fair, like I said at the time, I really think we did get a new found respect from him after he let us sit in on his set in The Trap. 

Maja: 

I arrived safe and sound at my parents place yesterday, and I am going to spend the time there until I meet up with Mark next time. Wherever that is going to be. It’s wonderful to be back home for a little while, and I get to hang out with my family and hopefully some friends as well while I have surgery and recover from it. My surgery appointment is on Thursday, and then they are going to remove the troublesome and painful ganglion I have on my left wrist. For the second time. I hope it’ll disappear for good this time. But who knows. It certainly has been restricting movement in my left hand for about a year now, and I’ve barely been using it since last spring. Which is a real shame, since I have really wanted to play both bass and guitar. I’m only just starting out with guitar, I know some basic chords and rhythms, and it would be a great tool for me to have especially in songwriting, but no. I have a messed up left hand instead. Balls. But what this actually means is that I won’t be distracting myself with what really matters for me and our project right now, which is training myself to be a great singer. I can do that. I am doing that.

But I still grieve the lost mobility of my left hand. I want it back. I hope it’ll come back soon.

I’m not going to go into details on day to day life here in Sweden. We’ll get back to that when the tour is properly starting. Oh boy, am I looking forward to that. 

Day six

Monday November 8

Mark:

On the way back from the airport bus to Dublin city centre I have the radio on my headphones. Out of nowhere, the DJ starts talking about a show he saw in London’s West End recently. Pride And Prejudice (Sort Of). Says it’s the funniest thing he’s seen in a long time. 

MJ calls me today. He’s an old friend from Cork and is one of the most positive, talented and hardest working people I’ve ever met. Apart from it just being cool to get in touch with him again, he is someone I would like to know about what we’re doing simply because he’s always all over the place in all kinds of interesting creative projects so you just never know what he’s into or who he’s dealing with. I don’t plan on asking for anything, I just want to give him the heads up and leave that to settle. He totally gets it and is thrilled to hear of everything that’s been going on and basically gets a real kick out of hearing the story, where we are with it and what we’re planning to do next. But after the initial hellos and how the hell are you doings and all that, I ask what he’s been up to. Well, that Mr DJ’s favourite new show, MJ’s only the sound designer for it, developing the songs. There’s kudos. My old mate. All the way to the West End. Couldn’t have happened to a more deserving person. So yeah, he is quite well positioned. And of course, as you’d imagine, a whole load of other stuff going on as well, including an independent record deal and an actual vinyl album on the way. I’ll give that a little plug when I hear all things are finalised and it’s available.

This is a really wonderful and energetic chat and we cover a lot of ground. But it’s also cool that we don’t get nostalgic at all with talking about old respective glories and adventures – among other things, he was once in my band and I depped with his.

Later on me and Maja are on the phone for four hours. It’s a full on hang out and an evening in itself. Once we’re done, not far off midnight, it’s movie time. Some Kind Of Monster, the docu-movie that almost inadvertently ended up covering the break up of Metallica. Before I put it on, I go and bring the guitar up from the studio. I think it will be good to just have it to hand.

A little way into the movie, maybe inspired by all its studio vibes, I pick the guitar up and start to work on a little idea we called Shine, from the two hour random material listening session we did on Thursday. Snatches of ideas start to come. For the following three hours I alternate between the movie and the song. Write till I feel there’s no idea left, back to the movie. Oh. Idea. Back to the song. And on it goes. I continue with this until I feel totally dry and really can’t do anymore. By the time lights go out, I’m nowhere near the end of the movie. They haven’t mentioned looking for a bass player yet.

Day seven

Tuesday November 9

Mark:

I’m woken sometime around 8:30am with ideas rattling round my head for the break in When I’m With You. This was supposed to be in Friday’s set but a few things with it just weren’t sitting right and the issues centred around the break. By 9 I’m up, pen, paper and guitar, and within a few minutes I have a new break. Oh man I feel ON. Today will be just songwriting. I can really feel it. Shine is well on its way and there are so many other ideas flying about that I just have to get hold of.

Yeah. It worked to have the guitar in here. If I hadn’t, I’m not sure I would have got to my writing session last night. And it was really nice to have it just sitting there this morning to get up and hit it straight away with what was in my head and to have the idea come out like that.

There and then I realise it’s not enough to have the guitar here for whenever I want it. I want the full studio setup. So I go downstairs and, in relays, bring up everything else for recording. It’s not a huge mission to be fair, but it’s so cool to now have it all here at the end of the bed. Mic stand and mic. Music stand. Interface and cable, headphones and external speaker monitor. Along with guitar and stand. And of course the computer. I also bring up the small coffee table to use as a desk and the wooden mini step ladder that also serves as a chair. This would not work if the two of us are here. Bedroom is bedroom and studio is studio. For very good reason. If one of us wants to go do something at 2am, we can, by going downstairs to a whole other room. Completely defeats the purpose to have it all in here. But with me on my own, I’m not disturbing anyone so I can have it here. Also, while the studio does get natural light from the back window out to the back garden, the front window is on the street. Not only do we want privacy in here, but we also don’t want to advertise all the music stuff we have. The basses, the amps, and other bits and pieces. Upstairs, I can have the blinds open and all the natural light you could want. Our studio is simply the coolest room I’ve ever had in any house I’ve ever lived in and I know it’s the same for Maja. And she’s just the tiniest bit sad when she hears later I’ve done this. But I’ve always thought it would be nice to have the window, and for right now, it makes total sense for me to have studio and bedroom as the same space. 

Set up like I am now, I get right to it examining and playing through the ideas I came up with last night. By 11:30 I’ve got a song written and done a one track recording of it on my phone to send to Maja. I love it love it love it and I know Maja will too. I just know she will flip when she hears this.

My plan now is to take a break, and then get onto some of the other ideas. I fully expect to get another song out of today. Maybe even another two. And in between I plan to get a few guitar parts down for Maja of our existing songs. 

Maja’s on the phone. She says nothing about the song. She doesn’t know I’ve sent her anything. But then she says she’s listened to it. This is not very encouraging. Then it gets even less so. ‘What do you think of it?’ she asks. This is not a good sign. It’s like when you finish a gig or a jam and someone says, ‘Did you enjoy that?’ They didn’t like it but don’t want to hurt your feelings so they fill the gap with something they think will be nice right where their opinion should be.

Maja:

Oh, I only got time to listen to it once and the recording was a one track demo so I didn’t really want to give an opinion about it even before listening to it again. I tell Mark ‘The first time was a bit meh, and I remember so vividly how it felt when we were working on the songs in progress a couple of days ago. I want it to feel like that. I’m not even sure what’s wrong, please let me get back to you.’

Mark:

Oh well. I’m honest about it and tell Maja I was really excited about this one, and that I’m crushed. She in turn says she’s heartbroken to hear that but I rush to tell her I’m actually encouraged. It shows the honesty and that she’s not put off by hurting my feelings although it’s clear she’s not enjoying this. ‘Look,’ I say. ‘When people go around in music creation trying not to hurt people’s feelings you end up with St Anger.’ This is the album Metallica ended up making in that documentary I was watching last night. It’s pretty much unanimously agreed that it is a terrible album by a great band. But one of the reasons it happened, in my opinion, is that they decided to be too nice to each other. Brutal honesty disappeared and total mediocrity entered. 

So we get into a chat about what’s wrong with it. Maja thinks I’ve lost the vibe of the original idea. Fair enough. So we talk about how we could get that back without throwing the whole thing out. She says she’s going to have another listen and get back to me with some more specific ideas. One of my thoughts here is that I should have let the song sit for a day or two before sending it, then I might have come to the same conclusions. One thing about songwriting is that so many times you can get so excited about a new song you think it’s the best thing you’ve ever written, and then the next day listen to it and wonder what the hell you were thinking.

About half an hour later Maja calls again. I love it. Forget everything you were planning on doing today and record that for me to work on. We break down what’s just happened in the past half hour. Maja sat down to listen to it to analyse what she didn’t like. As she listened, she thought, ‘Actually, I like that part. I like the way it does that. I like that bit that’s totally different to the rest of it and makes it sound like two songs mashed together. Oh. I like it.’

Maja:

I just love it. Yeah. It is true to what I already knew it was and could be. Now I have something to work on. Brilliant. Well done.

Mark:

Wow. I get on it. But it proves a really hard guitar part to get down. It has to be really energetic but tight and it’s so hard not to speed up, even on the metronome. And I’m not sure if it is a difficult song to remember – not technically, but there are a few dips and changes to go through – or if it’s just so new I’m thinking about too much to be able to play it cleanly. Also, as I’m playing without vocals, it’s so hard to internalise what’s happening and when to hit changes, especially in some of the longer passages. In the end I decide to record a really boring one-two-three guitar part. All just down strumming exactly on each metronome beat while gently singing the song to keep myself in place. The idea then is to record a vocal over this. Not a good vocal, just a perfect in-time vocal with every single syllable exactly where it’s supposed to be. It’s enough of a job just to get those two things done, complete with vocal drop-ins to correct every tiny timing mistake, to make sure the vocal matches the metronome. Because when I come to play a guitar take, any vocals not right on the beat will throw me off. 

Later that night I get to it again, transposing the guitar part to a different key to open up the chords a lot more which also has the effect of moving it up half a step; I’d written it in F# with all barre chords. It’s now in G with all open chords. A whole lot more dynamic. I record a one track version on the phone like this then two more versions in different keys to give Maja options when she listens to it. 

By the time I’ve done all that it’s 1am

Day eight

Wednesday November 10

Mark:

First thing I send Maja the three versions I recorded last night and then hit the studio. Damn it’s hard. All the songs we’ve recorded so far I’ve gone into the studio and just laid the whole guitar part down first time. Or hit a minor bubble, started again and nailed it. I’ve even been recording multiple guitar parts for songs – the same part tracked. Again, in and out. This one, I just can’t get it to work. Either can’t stay on the metronome or forget how long parts are supposed to be, all kinds of stuff. It doesn’t help that. Oh, and having changed the chords from barre to open last night, the first thing I have to do is redo that simple recording concept I did last night before I can even get started.

By the time I’ve got that done and am taking a studio and screen break to get ready to go in again, Maja has other ideas for us. This very prologue thing you’re reading right now. She’s been writing her bits and pieces to get us up to date with last Saturday, meaning she’s now finished her parts covering the gig, and the next day and everything up to all that. And she’s been reconfiguring the website to include The Tour Diaries, and made whole chunks of the thing easier to use and more attractive to look at. It’s all astonishing work, not least because she’s done it while being preoccupied with surgery first thing tomorrow morning, but yes, she also wanted to get it done before then so that I could start contacting people and basically sending us out to the wider world. We’d already agreed that if she hadn’t got to this stage I would have just started running with what we have, but she has done it. So now she needs me to do a final thing myself which is to check her writings for English and to add any reactions I might have to what she’s written into the actual Diary. Once I’ve got onto that, we are done. We are ready.

Maja:

I’m just absolutely delighted I was able to finish writing the tour diary prologue, and update the website to actually feature it in a nice way. I also did a couple of improvements and I think the whole thing is becoming even more user friendly. I have a couple of more ideas of improvements I want to do to optimize usability, but I don’t know if they’d be doable without too much effort. I have a European tour to prepare for so my time is really limited.

Mark:

So what we have now is:

The Tour Diaries prologue up to and including our first gig.

The Diaries. Admittedly a long way behind, but they are there.

The website itself.

A whole bunch of different pitches written for different disciplines which can be easily personalised. 

A back of the book type presentation, which I’ve just decided I’ll give you in here in a minute.

Tracks recorded and up.

And a gig that went pretty well which really helps in the confidence stakes when I’m telling people what we can do.

Which, by definition means we have the set together to do a gig. It’s around half an hour with a few more songs in touching distance of being ready.

On top of that, we have our cards and beermats and a whole lot of merchandising ideas for stuff we can easily put together and transport in bulk in a car.

That back of the book thing

Maja’s life is falling apart. Living in Sweden, her marriage is crumbling along with her fledgling dreams of playing music professionally. 

Mark is an experienced professional musician living in lockdown London. He becomes Maja’s online music tutor and mentor. He has no idea of the turmoil in her life.

With nowhere else to turn, Maja confides in Mark who says, ‘You could come here.’

Exactly one week later they meet for the first time at Heathrow Airport. Before they arrive at Mark’s house they are an item.

Problems

Brexit. Maja can’t stay in England long term, and Mark can’t live in Europe.

Corona. Travel restrictions are in place all over the world, removing any other options.

Solution

Realising they can both live in Ireland, The Diaries move from central London to a tiny town in the Irish countryside where they set up their own studio. This becomes the staging post for songwriting and recording as they prepare for their next step – touring the world.

The Diaries series is a true, inspiring, and living story of love, music, and travel set against impossible odds, all told with an unwavering sense of fun and optimism.

Day nine

Thursday November 11

Maja:

Today is finally time for my dreaded and anticipated hand surgery. I arrive early and get to meet the hand surgeon who explains the procedure; they are planning keyhole surgery, and depending on the findings they might not need to reopen the old incision. They are removing a ganglion, and that ganglion is just under my thumb, next to a big artery. Usually ganglions have a root, and they hope to find that root, remove the root from the inside and then it hopefully won’t reappear again. The ganglion will then disappear in a couple of weeks or months. I feel very positive about this as I go into surgery. I get dressed in the hospital gown, and wait for my turn in the assigned bed in the wakeup area. I get to chat with the nurses, and have a nice chat with the nurse from my last surgery. She remembers me and we chat about what’s been happening with the music and my move to Ireland since last time. It’s nice to be remembered. As the time drags closer it’s my turn and I follow the nurses to the operating theatre. The room is quite big and I don’t really get a proper look around since everything goes so quickly. There’s a small board/bed like object in the middle of the room which I am instructed to lie down on. They cover my body in a couple of blankets because the room is properly cold, and I am shivering. They strap me in with a safety belt on top of the blankets, I guess in case I start to roll over or move or something. On my right arm they check my blood pressure. I also have an IV inserted into that arm. My left arm is getting disinfected and I’m asked to hold it up in the other direction. After it is properly disinfected, it gets covered in a sterile cloth and I lose sight of it. It feels very awkward lying here in the same position as Jesus on the cross. Without any control over my arms. The nurse holds the gas element over my mouth, and I focus on her eyelashes as I breath in the gas. Her eyelashes are slightly lumped together with mascara.

Next thing, I am in another room feeling completely dislocated and my hand is enormous. It takes quite a while before I am able to properly wake up. When I am more awake I get a cup of tea, apple juice, a sandwich and chocolate which I absentmindedly eat. I’m still groggy. When the surgeon comes by I am finally awake enough to have the conversation. He had opened up six holes on the back of my hand for the keyhole surgery, but he couldn’t find the root of the ganglion. But he found some other tissue injury on the back of the hand which he fixed. As for the ganglion, he had to open up the wrist up where the old incision was and remove the ganglion. He then said that he burned the area to prevent it from coming back again. But there’s still a chance it might come back again, and then he might not want to surgically remove it again. 

I am absolutely devastated. It might come back and if it does, he might not want to take it out again. I can barely call a surgery like this a success. 

When I get home, I’m sad and in pain. It might be fixed, but I am mourning since it might not be. I don’t want to live with that thing on my hand, restricting my movements. Please. Let it never come back. Please.

Mark:

Maja’s into surgery first thing this morning so I know I won’t be hearing from her for a while, although we do have an early morning call and keep in touch right up to when she goes in.

Now I start to send pitches. The bulk of this will just be researching who to send it to and just sending it and hope they get back. I’m looking at sending to different types of publication, both on and offline proposing a regular feature of The Tour Diaries once we get on the road in December. And there will also be book pitches to be sent and literary agents. And I’m also trying to get us on an established tour, either something to make us change our plans for December or, more likely, something starting hopefully early next year.

What I can say is that the people I want to get our stuff to really do not want to be called. I get it. You work for a music publication. The world and his mother either wants to be writing for that publication or being written about by it. That’s a lot of people looking for their attention. If you were able to call, they’d never be off the phone dealing with just that stuff. So, email us please. If we like it, we’ll call you. Fine.

But there is one person I can speak to. I hope. I know we’re not right for him, but he might just know someone we will be right for, then I can go to them with his name and his blessing. And it will be nice to start with at least one friendly phonecall where I might just get the time of day and a little more besides. This is to John Dolan who was my boss when I was a music writer and general feature writer on The Evening Echo in Cork.

The mad thing here is, he was already going to be my first attempted point of contact today. He popped up on my social media last night and we had a little hello and I let him know I was living in Ireland. Which he said he would be interested in knowing more about. Well, he’s about to get the full lowdown.

I message him first thing saying I have something I would like to talk about and I leave my number, and he’s back to me almost immediately with his number saying I can call anytime. I’m on it immediately and we have the most wonderful catch up and chat. He’s hugely enthusiastic about all that we’re doing and says that yes, it really sounds like something the right kinds of publications would be very happy to work with and would pay for. Not his as they have a more specific brief, but then I knew that. What he does do is give me the name of the right person to speak to on one of the nationals. And I can drop his name in there. Brilliant brilliant. Thankyou very much. I’m on it. I call that newspaper office, expecting to be put through and to tell that person I’m an ex colleague of John’s and a former fellow journo and all that. But reception tells me all journalists are working from home, can’t be called and here’s her email address. Great. My one solid contact, complete with reference, and all I can do is email and hope it gets picked up. At least I’m able to mention my association with her friend and colleague in the subject field but that really isn’t the impact I was looking for.

After this, it’s onto the numbers game of identifying publications, trying to identify the right person if possible and sending the right kind of email.

Out of office hours and it’s back to recording, finally succeeding in getting a vocal down that’s absolutely on the line for every single syllable. 

Day 10

Friday November 12

Mark:

7am and I’m up and on the guitar to prepare this song for recording. In the kitchen with yesterday’s vocal track playing and the metronome on. I’m working on internalising this guitar part and getting it totally locked. A lot of this is just looping the intro and the first verse, really nailing it with the vocals.

I get that done, complete with double tracked vocals, and send it to Maja, she loves it and asks for another version in a different key. This means repeating the whole recording process all over again. But I have this now and little more than an hour later I have that too. Then I decide to learn the next song she wants for recording – an old one of mine called Does It Matter. 

Maja:

With very few exceptions, there are no proper studio recordings of Mark’s old songs. It’s mainly simple demos that he recorded by himself which I have listened to. And recently, listening to them, I have really started to feel Does It Matter. I want to do that one, and feel confident that I can perform it in a good way. I want to blow life into that song. 

Mark:

In a way Maja has blown life into so many of the songs. She really is making them feel brand new, even to me and it’s really mad to be hearing and especially playing some of them again, while at the same time adding new material to the pile that we feel equally good about.

After a solid day of practice and recording I’m totally done. And it’s bar time. This will be the first time I’ve been to The Trap since we played.

I am in no way prepared for what meets me. At first it’s kinda gentle. Just chatting and hanging out with a few of the regulars, mainly Breda and Mick. Then out of nowhere, Breda says to me, ‘Your song, I Like You Better When I’m Naked. That’s the best song I’ve heard for years.’ And I won’t say who, but someone asks if I’d be interested in selling them the rights for it. I won’t say how much for either, but I think they’re actually serious. No no and no. Breda again. ‘That song is a hit. You really should sell the rights.’ I really think I shouldn’t. She then tells me that last week we absolutely blew up on Snapchat. Wow. OK.

Maja:

No way we’re selling those rights. As a 50% shareholder, I am putting my veto in. Not happening.

Mark:

Meeting adjourned. Rights stay where they are.

Then the landlord Jimmy suggests I go and see what’s happening out back. So I do. Damn. It’s a full on wedding afters. The band is really cool – just acoustic guitar, cajon and a frontman but they really make it work. I say hi to a few people I know then go back into the front bar. A little while later, our new friend Eileen grabs me and leads me to the buffet area where the band are taking a break and hanging out. She introduces me to them as a songwriter. Cool. So we have a bit of a chat there before they go back out, and we’re joined by Adam, a well known DJ in the town who’ll be doing this thing later on. 

When the band kicks off again, I feel like checking them out so back in I go. I’ve been in a few minutes when Cyvina comes up to me. She’s the girl who first got Maja to sing in here a few days before our show. She didn’t make it to our Friday night, but she says to me now, ‘Do you know you guys have gone viral?’ Sorry? What? Your show last week. It blew up on Facebook. She shows me some stuff now. Three videos, all with hundreds of comments, a combined total or around a thousand likes, and whole bunches of shares. One video of our A Capella song Bang Bang, which we wrote the night before the show, has had well over 500 likes and over 50 shares. I don’t know what really constitutes as viral, but if you consider the local numbers, this is quite significant. This town has 3,500 people and the biggest town in the county, Tullamore, ten minutes down the road, only has 15,000. And to put it into even more perspective, when The Trap announced it was reopening after lockdown, that post got just 20 shares. It’s now that I start to realise that I’m kinda being recognised. A girl I’ve never seen before comes up to me and says, ‘I thought you guys were on tour.’ To which I reply we soon will be, but Maja has gone to Sweden and we’ll be meeting in Berlin in a few weeks. OK. She’s satisfied with that answer. 

As for the ‘viral’ videos, I’m really sorry to report that I don’t have the Facebook links. What I subsequently learn is that Cyvina just happened to be looking at a message as she saw me, scrolled down that person’s feed, and found the videos and then grabbed me and showed me. She’s then very quickly off before I get the chance to ask her to copy the link and send it to me, and I think I’ll see her later on but I just don’t. Moving forwards, she was later unable to remember whose page they were on and so far, I’ve not been able to find them to see what else is going on or to engage with people. It feels like a big missed opportunity and I’m kicking myself for not being quicker in the moment, but it really didn’t feel like an urgent enough thing to try to stop her from running off, and she will tell me she’s kicking herself for not being more on the ball in the moment as well. But it’s fine. I saw it, and I can just feel recognition in the air. Being in here tonight, I can see that we really have tickled some kind of consciousness.

Maja:

I’m so envious. Ridiculously envious. So I’ve been performing and been grabbing these peoples hearts, but, really, I have no way of knowing that except through Mark. He tells me all kinds of stories when we talk in the evening. I’m lying in bed, trying to rest and am feeling sorry for myself with my hand resting on a pillow. It hurts too much to have it on the bed. So someone tried to buy the rights to our song at the bar? Wait what? That’s just mad. And people are recognising you? And asking about me? Wait what? I don’t even know anyone there. I mean I’ve kinda half chatted to some people at the bar, but not even that much. This just feels strange. And amazing. I wonder what people would tell me if I was there. Would they care? Would they love me? Try to take photos? Would heads turn? Would whispers spread? Am I having hubris, or would those things actually happen? I have no idea. Maybe they would demand a performance like last Wednesday? That was just crazy and I really didn’t wish to sing that night, but it was still amazing to be so popular that I couldn’t refuse a request like that. Everything feels so unreal as I lie in bed, fantasizing about fame, the very same bed I slept in as a teenager. The very same room I lived in as a teenager. I remember so many nights lying here, speaking on the phone, dreaming about the future. Dreaming about my next trip, my next adventure. So here I am, once again, lying here, dreaming. But this time the dreams feel so unreal. So I am dreaming about becoming something of a pop/rock star. It just feels so unrealistic to even type, but it just feels like it is going to happen. It feels like I’m telling you we’re expecting rain tomorrow. It’s just going to happen. Of course I don’t know that, as you never know that it is actually going to rain.

Mark: 

We live in Ireland. It’s going to rain tomorrow.

Maja:

But right now, speaking with Mark about what happened at the bar today, it feels like it’s going to happen. And thinking about that feels just mad. It makes me excited, but also very sad that I am not there to see the reactions for myself. It would be amazing to see, but I can’t. But that might be for the best, who knows? What I can do is just to lie here in bed, rest and dream. Dream about everything that can be. Everything I will make happen.

Day 12

Sunday November 14

Mark:

Sometimes if one of us can’t get to sleep – normally me – one of us might go to the other room for the night. Again, normally me. When I wake up I’m surprised to see Maja isn’t next to me. My immediate reaction is to wonder why she slept in the other room last night. Then I suddenly wake up properly and realise where she is. Oh. Silly boy.

Once I’m up and awake, I decide to get a pretty significant job off my to do list. Record the set for Maja on just guitar so that she’s able to practice by herself with this to run through. I go into the studio for that and it actually turns out to be really good practice for me as well, playing the songs through without any vocals. And also just playing the songs through because if you don’t do this every now and again, they can disappear from your mind and be a hassle to get back again. Also, seeing as one of my next things is going to be to start getting to recording all these for Maja to make actual demos of in Sweden, it’s great practice there. 

Maja:

We’re optimistically thinking that I’ll actually be able to record any of the demos and yes, I’d love to do it. But I’m not in shape to start yet, but maybe I’ll get to it either here in Sweden or maybe in Germany, so it’s great to have them. 

Day 13

Monday November 15

Mark:

I really thought there would be a lot more publishing opportunities than there seems to be. I’m not talking books, more magazines and newspapers and their online equivalents. I thought there would be almost countless opportunities to target and maybe build up some kind of syndication or portfolio that could serve as an instant income stream and constant publicity, but now I’m looking up close, I see that we really fall through the gaps of so many; not quite completely music and not quite completely travel. And when you’re looking at publications around the world, they generally have one thing in common. They feature people from their catchment area. So American press, if they were to feature anyone abroad, would feature Americans and so on. We just don’t seem to be hitting the buttons hard enough and pretty much falling through the cracks. 

Maja:

It’s just great that Mark’s on this. Hopefully we’ll be able to catch someone’s eye. I think we have something cool going on. If this is not worth publishing, I honestly don’t know what is.

Day 14

Tuesday November 16

Mark:

I settle into a pattern over the next few days of recording tracks for Maja to work on in Sweden and contacting venues in Berlin. And looking at all the Irish bars they have there that might not have music regularly or at all, but we think we could go in and persuade them to let us do our half hour thing. There really is no point contacting them though. I have enough experience of this with bars through my years booking and hustling with The Insiders. Music venues, yes. Email them, or maybe even call them, but most don’t like being called as I’m seeing here. But bars? Forget it. You have to walk in, find a manager, and talk to them. Then, maybe, just maybe.

So my thing now is mostly being in the studio for recording and calling and emailing. With this, I move everything back downstairs and start utilising our wonderful studio space again. It really was fun to have it all in the bedroom but equally, it’s feels great to be back in here again.

The plan now is for everything to have two identical guitar tracks to thicken that out, then under there, bass which may well be barely audible and just enough to lift the guitar tracks. Then we’ll have some light percussion and of course the vocals. The idea is to be able to present a representation of us that is big and lively, but not so much that we’re selling ourselves on false pretences. You know, wonderful grooving basslines locked into supercool drums, people hear it, book us for their band night, then we turn up with just a single guitar. 

So yeah. Next few days is just totally on that. I have work to do.

Maja:

And I’m just sleeping. Glad someone is doing the work.

Day 18

Saturday November 20

Mark:

I’m not really one for going out to a bar with nothing going on on the offchance. If there’s a gig on, or a jam, or sport, or anything really, great. Then I can happily hang on my own and get talking to people, either strangers or people I know however vaguely. Tonight works as a go-ey out thing. Saturday night in The Trap is band night so yeah, I’m there

Almost immediately I bump into Adam, Steve and a few of their friends. They start telling anyone around us that I’m in the next U2, and they ask about Maja and how she’s doing. Then Adam sings, ‘I like you better when you’re naked,’ at me. Wow. This thing has really hit. Now there are a whole bunch of guys at a table behind us and Adam and Steve want to introduce me to them. There’s a band in here and it’s a bit loud so no-one can really talk much and we can’t even really do introductions. But the guys at the table make it clear they know of me. Before I know it, I’m centre of a whole bunch of guys and pictures are being taken. Then I’m picked up like a trophy. And pictures are being taken. Or video. I have no idea. Is this a ‘we’re with the guy in the band’ moment or a ‘Let’s make fun of the guy in the band’ moment? I have no idea but it all feels like good times Saturday night times. And just like last week, a few people come up to me and ask when the tour’s beginning and ask where my girlfriend is. And just like last week, I don’t know anyone who’s asking. Seems like we’re getting around this town.

I settle in and basically have a great night among the regulars, mingling in and out with people. And afterwards Maja calls to hear all about it. Once more she’s feeling thrilled and totally left out at the same time. And once more, I tell her she’s the coolest person in town precisely because she’s not here.

Maja:

Come on. This is just mad. What’s even the deal with this? Someone just picked you up? To take photos, or videos? And I was the one singing? No-one has ever done anything even similar to me. It’s mad. And amazing. I am envious beyond, but at the same time so happy that it is happening. It’s absurd being here and just hearing about all the cool things that are happening in Ireland. 

Day 19

Sunday, November 21

Maja:

Mark is really trying his best to find publishers and magazines to monetise this project as quickly as possible, but I’m thinking we should focus a little more on what actually matters, the tour, producing music and writing diaries. We can’t allow ourselves to be derailed too long from the core project that is the diaries. We live life, do music and write about it. Right now, the music needs more attention, and we need to focus on that. Doing too many administrative tasks before we really have the music in place could be a little bit counterproductive. It’s important to stay focused, and I don’t think that we can do too much until we’re on the ground. People are about meetings, and it’s easier to explain to someone when we’re there, face to face. I know these things take time, but we agree Mark should be focusing on music right now. We’re going to make this happen. We’ll find a way. We have a couple of ideas. Let’s see what we decide to do next.

Day 20

Monday November 22

Yep, and as we move into the last week in Ireland before Berlin, I’m really focussed on contacting venues to see what can be shaken out, and really just getting ourselves introduced. It’s pretty much that and prep work to make sure all the packing is in order, and the house is left in as good a shape as it can possibly be before I leave.

Day 22

Wednesday November 24

We have our first gig offer for Berlin. The Artliners, December 19. This quickly gets agreed and confirmed. We have lift off. 

Maja:

Just amazing. Someone actually got back to us with a gig offer. And it is going to be livestreamed, so anyone following The Diaries can actually tune in. Amazing. I can’t believe it is true. And no, I have absolutely no concept whatsoever of what it is actually going to be like to play it. But I look forward to it. A lot. It’s probably not that big, but surprise me. It’s going to be an amazing to experience. And I also think we’ll meet other musicians that are going to play there too, which I have never done before. I’ve never been to a gig like this before, not even as an audience member. My experience is a couple of concerts and rock gigs in Stockholm over ten years ago, but I have no idea if this is going to be similar in any way, shape or form. I just don’t know and that excites me. I hope we get a big audience, the bigger the better, but honestly I’m going to perform the same way regardless.

Day 23

Thursday Nov 25

Mark:

All the other replies coming in is from venues saying they’re not currently doing gigs because of Covid. This is a little concerning to say the least as it seems a real danger that Berlin could close down before we even get there. There’s already talk of other places in Europe talking about lockdowns. This is a bit of a concerning time and, while I know many other people have suffered much more from Covid, it would really be a blow to cancel our European tour this close to heading off after planning this for so long. Right back to that conversation on March 17, eight months ago. And all the preparation in Ireland. This really has been in the works a long time and it would be heartbreaking to have it all closed down before it even had a chance to begin.

Maja:

I guess this is the only thing that worries me. Eventual lockdowns and other impossibilities because of covid. But if that happens, we’ll just go back to Ireland and produce our album. Another thing I am nervous about is the hustling. Actually going into pubs and bars and asking for a gig. Could it really happen just like that? But this is Mark’s speciality so I’m going to leave the talking to him. I’ll command the room at our performances instead, that’s my job. That somehow feels easier right now. But I might learn how to do the hustling, who knows?

Today it is finally two weeks since the surgery and I get my bandages off. At the hospital, they cut off the bandages and I can finally see how my hand looks. It actually looks quite alright. The new incision follows the old one really nicely. It’s going to look like only one scar when it’s healed. As for the keyhole surgery, I find 5 holes at the back of my hand that kind of look like staples. They’re black and straight. It is really painful on both the backside of the hand and the front, and a lot of bruising. But that is going to go away real soon. I get to meet another surgeon and talk a little and then I get two wrist supports. One for more day to day activities if I want to use it, and one for training, so that I won’t hurt it doing more strenuous activities. Such as push ups. The surgeon expresses a lot of anger regarding push ups, and talks about how bad it is for young women with soft joints to do sports like that since it so easily wrecks their wrists. She’s apparently seen many people like me. Young active women with wrecked wrists. Which is quite sad since we’re encouraged to do push ups, but no one is talking about the dangers with it. Only the benefits. So beware, if you have soft joints, push ups can actually be bad for you and wreck your wrists, and then you’ll have surgery. Twice maybe more. As I had. But an encouraging thing we spoke about was guitar/bass playing and she doesn’t think that that will make the ganglion come back. Which is great. 

I just hope it won’t come back full stop.

Day 24

Friday Nov 26

I’ve decided I don’t really want to go out tonight. So I don’t Instead, I stay in and write Insanity. This is from a fragment of a song idea I started messing about with a few weeks ago which was centred around lyrics we wrote back in London in Maja’s first few weeks there, with the concept coming from Maja’s own thoughts and experiences. I’m now bashing and shaping this few pages of lyrics into melodies which fit what I’m working on now. I get it finished, roughly recorded and send it to Maja. She gets back to me immediately. 

Maja:

Insanity! It’s insane. It’s just amazing. And I remember very well when we started with the lyrics back in Carol Close, in London. It was lovely being next to Mark. And now, I’m struggling with multiple feelings. I really really wish I was there so I could be more present in what he is doing, but I am also so happy that he finds the motivation and time to write music. It’s great. But I’m still sad. I feel left out. Left out of something that feels so incredibly personal to me. But I’m going to get the opportunity to put my spin on it as soon as we meet up and start working on it. I just wish I was there.

Mark:

With this I decide I will go out afterall. Off to The Trap where, as soon as I enter, a girl sitting at the bar who I don’t know insists on buying me a drink. Five minutes later, she and her friends leave. I’m now hanging out with a few of the regulars we’ve got to know quite well in here and who were at our show.

They start to talk to me about a bar in New York which is pretty much the Clara bar where a lot of people from Clara go and people from Offaly, who live in New York, frequent. They give me their surnames and say that if we go in there and mention we know them, and say we live in Clara, we will be assured of a warm welcome. With this, we suddenly have an in to New York.

Maja:

Every time Mark goes out something completely unexpected seems to happen. Which is amazing. So we have somewhere to begin in New York now. I’m not sure how much that actually means, but it is something that we definitely didn’t have yesterday.

Day 25

Saturday November 27

Band night at The Trap and I’m out for it. The place is packed when I enter around 9pm and I know a few of the guys around the bar in front of the band. Immediately they’re asking me if I can get up and do a song tonight. I bat the requests away, saying that no-one wants to hear me sing. Yes, me and Maja have spoken about it and agreed I won’t do any performances without her. Still, the insistences continue and I continue to politely refuse. But I can’t deny that this is really cool. 

Day 26

Sunday November 28

It’s Pat’s Sunday in The Goalpost in Tullamore but I can’t get hold of him and don’t want to assume I can just turn up and get a lift back. He might have canceled for any reason for a start. Or he might have plans for later. But really, I just don’t want to do him the dis-courtesy of just turning up expecting I can get a lift home without asking. And there really is no point taking the train because, by the time I’d arrive at the venue, I’d have already missed the last train home. 

I decide I’m quite cool with staying in and am getting well settled when my phone rings about 8:30. It’s Pat returning my call. I thank him very much for getting back, but say it’s too late now. I’ve already missed the last train out. No problem he says. He’s five minutes away, he can give me a lift there and back. Brilliant. Best get my proper skates on and get ready then. So I do.

We arrive and as he goes to his spot to set up, he sees someone at the table right in front that he knows. Hang on. I know him too. It’s the drummer from last night and Pat formally introduces us. His name’s John by the way. This is cool. Pat gets started, nice and lively so it’s not really possible for me and John to talk too much, but we do the clinky glasses thing and snatch little, inconsequential chats in between songs.

Later, we move over to the bar and it becomes a little easier to talk. We chat about John’s drumming experience – he really has a lot – and the live scene in general in Tullamore and the county. Then he asks what I’m up to musically. When I tell him I’m heading to Berlin to start a European tour the day after tomorrow, he totally recoils. ‘Oh wow,’ he says. ‘I’m talking to a celebrity.’ ‘No, no no,’ I assure him. But he won’t be dissuaded. We go back and forth and have a laugh about this and eventually, he concedes. A little. ‘OK, I’m talking to someone who’s going to be a celebrity.’ I’m happy to leave that one there.

Day 27

Monday November 29

Maja:

I’ve been fixing so much with the car recently. There are different laws and regulations in different countries in Europe, so I have to make sure I’m prepared for them. My car currently has winter tyres on, and the summer tyres are broken so I have bought new summer tyres that I am going to put on the car today. Which is crazy enough in itself. To put on summer tyres when it has just reached minus 8 degrees. But apparently it’s illegal to drive with the studded ones in Germany, so I guess I’ll have to drive around here with summer tyres for now. In the middle of winter. It’s still better to have the summer tyres on, because when I finally reach Ireland, it’s going to be summer weather. At least as far as tyres is concerned. I just hope it won’t start to snow until I leave, because I don’t think the hour drive to the ferry will be very safe otherwise. I also get the properly serviced. We’re planning on driving all over Europe and I don’t want it to break down on us so far from home.

Mark:

Nice little tickle, also while on the subject of cars. Our landlord, who’s always been super helpful when anything has popped up, has offered to give me a lift to Dublin airport tomorrow. He has something on there and says he’s happy to make the little detours to pick me up and then make the airport drop. So that’s me sorted for tomorrow. And it’s not even one of those early flights, so a nice, chilled, 11:30 departure time from the house. Absolutely brilliant.